Hath we forgotten?
My mommy left home when I was three
and she didn't leave much for my pa and me
as I cried and cried and begged her please to stay
Now I don't blame her cause she left my dad
He's a giant beta, but what makes me sad
Was before she left she went and named me "Cay"
Well she must o' thought that was quite a name
Soaked in tears and wrapped in shame
It seems I got picked on e'ery day
Some gal'd call me faggot and I'd turn red
Some guy'd fill a toilet bowl with m'head
I tell ya, life ain't easy for a boy named Cay
Well I grew up weak and I grew up sad
Spent my life postin' in the 'YAD
I'd use a manly avatar to hide my shame
But I made a vow to the moon and stars
That I'd be a mod and posting superstar
And I'd leave behind this fucking awful name
It was ole' twitterverse in mid-july
Like it always was, my dick was dry
I thoght I'd tweet a broken slutty gal
I joined her as she slang some mud
I stared at her and pulled my pud
What's the worse can happen anyhow?
Well it turns out that this wasn't FYAD
And my powers here were might sad
I couldn't ban and got called on my shit
I went back to the QCS
And sat in my chair and beat my chest
And I said "MY NAME IS CAY! YES ITS QUITE FAY!
NOW GOKU GONNA DIE!!!"
ect. ect. I'm done.
Well, to get between those attention whore thighs
I said he was one of those patriarchy guys
And expected him to run away from Twitter and cower in fear.
But he came back with a zinger and a jab
So I told him to suck my dick like a fag
And I was grinning 140 characters from ear to ear
I tell ya, I've been in slapfights with plenty of men
And I usually gas or permaban them
With moderator of Something Awful Forum powers
I saw him respond with another pun
And start trending like a son of a gun
Then get retweeted by the SS pantshitters and all of their followers
And he said: "Abe you know I ain't got no beef
But I believe you've got a mistaken belief
About who exactly it is you think you’re puttin' down.
I’m only thirteen, and now you’re positioned
With evidence of having propositioned
An underage minor for sex with your hairy mound.”
He said: "I think you should thank me for insulting that hoe
Who brushes her teeth with a vibrating dildo
And shows off the things she was sticking up her nighty gown.
I won’t suck your dick and I won’t be afraid
Of a grown man who goes by the name of “Cay”
But I will get you de-moded and fired and run out of town."
So SS posted a thread about the Twitter link
And 4chan called my boss with the leak
And I got called in for an employee review
And I think about him, every day
About how much harm he caused your old pal Cay
And the next time I ask an underage boy to suck my dick, I’ll use… Grinder or Tumblr or Backpage! Any damn thing but Twitter!