;

Author Topic: Funny Shit From The News  (Read 190142 times)

Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0

  • 5000 Posters Club
  • Fagmin
  • *
  • Posts: 8776
  • We don't need another hero
  • Awards Metal Fan Classicist Took Down an Admin You're Great...No, YOU'RE Great! old Took down a Moderator Something Wonderful Goon or Ex-Goon TNE Veteran Sasstronaut United Statesian Bah Jaysus!
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5325 on: August 26, 2018, 08:01:07 AM »
0
Rogue is totally a slang word for thief in Southeast,Ky. Just like calling people/children heathens is a thing.  :jesse:

On Justified Boyd Crowder liked to proudly declare himself an "outlaw", is that a thing among small time criminals there?

Jim Acostas Impotent Rage

  • Cishet White Male
  • ******
  • Posts: 2462
  • Awards Deplorables
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5326 on: August 27, 2018, 09:26:29 AM »
+6
Remember when "Thug" was suddenly racist?

Yankees are Scum

  • Unperson
  • *****
  • Posts: 891
  • Awards White Chick Wounded Multiple Times in the Line of Posting United Statesian Fuck you, dad! You can't know! 420
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5327 on: August 27, 2018, 12:20:35 PM »
+7
Rogue is totally a slang word for thief in Southeast,Ky. Just like calling people/children heathens is a thing.  :jesse:

On Justified Boyd Crowder liked to proudly declare himself an "outlaw", is that a thing among small time criminals there?

Nope,not really. The "fuck the police" attitude is totally a thing with the white trash here though which is really funny in a way. It's all "fuck those pigs and fuck snitches" until a fist fight happens.  Then they all call the same cops they badmouth.

InsideOutside

  • Cishet White Male
  • ******
  • Posts: 2333
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5328 on: August 27, 2018, 05:23:24 PM »
+5
A fascinating window into the mind of a Jewess:

https://www.texasmonthly.com/articles/the-other-side-of-the-story/

Quote
We would still have to go to synagogue on Tuesday, my father said, where he and my mother would digest the truth before they fasted for the start of the Jewish New Year. The four of us would go to temple to mark the first of the ten days of repentance, and we would be much too honest with strangers. We would correct the people who had seen inaccurate local news reports about Trace Lehrer, who knew him as the middle school teacher that sexually abused a current student—some preteen boy, according to the stories.

I would tell anyone who mentioned Trace Lehrer that the “victim” was actually a former student and that she was actually a fourteen-year-old girl. I would tell them that I was the girl and that I hadn’t been sexually abused, then swear that Trace Lehrer loved me and that I loved him back. It couldn’t be abuse when he and I had discussed what we were going to name our kids. I would tell them that none of this was fair, and I would feel slightly embarrassed because I would know that the strangers agreed with me—it wasn’t fair—but that they would think it wasn’t fair for different reasons. I would tell only those who weren’t strangers that I missed Trace Lehrer and that I knew he and I would speak soon, but everyone felt like a stranger then.

bonus lol - the same person who wrote ^^ also wrote VV:


David Hedgehogstein

  • Cishet White Male
  • Knights
  • *
  • Posts: 3489
  • Member of Jew Club
  • Awards Goon or Ex-Goon old Swear on me mum m8
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5329 on: August 27, 2018, 06:11:18 PM »
+2
A fascinating window into the mind of a Jewess:

https://www.texasmonthly.com/articles/the-other-side-of-the-story/

Quote
We would still have to go to synagogue on Tuesday, my father said, where he and my mother would digest the truth before they fasted for the start of the Jewish New Year. The four of us would go to temple to mark the first of the ten days of repentance, and we would be much too honest with strangers. We would correct the people who had seen inaccurate local news reports about Trace Lehrer, who knew him as the middle school teacher that sexually abused a current student—some preteen boy, according to the stories.

I would tell anyone who mentioned Trace Lehrer that the “victim” was actually a former student and that she was actually a fourteen-year-old girl. I would tell them that I was the girl and that I hadn’t been sexually abused, then swear that Trace Lehrer loved me and that I loved him back. It couldn’t be abuse when he and I had discussed what we were going to name our kids. I would tell them that none of this was fair, and I would feel slightly embarrassed because I would know that the strangers agreed with me—it wasn’t fair—but that they would think it wasn’t fair for different reasons. I would tell only those who weren’t strangers that I missed Trace Lehrer and that I knew he and I would speak soon, but everyone felt like a stranger then.

bonus lol - the same person who wrote ^^ also wrote VV:


Whole thing reads like a pedo's wankfest
Disgusting.


Spokker

  • Cishet White Male
  • ******
  • Posts: 1234
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5330 on: September 05, 2018, 12:43:30 PM »
+9
Remember, guys. Gang members have a code. They only shoot each other!

https://abcnews.go.com/US/killed-hours-city-mother-phd-student-fatally-shot/story?id=57590455

Quote
A Northwestern University doctoral student who beat cancer was one of six people shot to death over the weekend in Chicago, gunned down by a stray bullet when he walked into the middle of a gunfight just four hours after arriving in the city to start school, police and his mother said.

A certain form of cancer still got him.

Spokker

  • Cishet White Male
  • ******
  • Posts: 1234
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5331 on: September 05, 2018, 12:47:02 PM »
+4
http://www.foxnews.com/world/2018/09/05/boy-15-beheaded-himself-with-chainsaw-after-losing-computer-game-reports.html

Quote
Russian police are investigating claims a boy beheaded himself with a chainsaw after losing at a computer game.

I wonder if he yelled, "Timber!"

Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0

  • 5000 Posters Club
  • Fagmin
  • *
  • Posts: 8776
  • We don't need another hero
  • Awards Metal Fan Classicist Took Down an Admin You're Great...No, YOU'RE Great! old Took down a Moderator Something Wonderful Goon or Ex-Goon TNE Veteran Sasstronaut United Statesian Bah Jaysus!
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5332 on: September 05, 2018, 02:23:49 PM »
+6
Damn, when he told u he was hardcore he wasn't kidding

:stare:

InsideOutside

  • Cishet White Male
  • ******
  • Posts: 2333
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5333 on: September 05, 2018, 02:57:49 PM »
+6
A year after Hurricane Harvey, Houston grapples with the most pressing issue of rebuilding a city and preventing such a thing from ever happening again:

Won't anyone think about the Orthodox Jews? (skip to 30:10)

https://www.npr.org/podcasts/478859728/think


White Rapper

  • Cishet White Male
  • Goon Institute
  • *
  • Posts: 1205
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5334 on: September 05, 2018, 03:03:40 PM »
+3
Remember, guys. Gang members have a code. They only shoot each other!

https://abcnews.go.com/US/killed-hours-city-mother-phd-student-fatally-shot/story?id=57590455

Quote
A Northwestern University doctoral student who beat cancer was one of six people shot to death over the weekend in Chicago, gunned down by a stray bullet when he walked into the middle of a gunfight just four hours after arriving in the city to start school, police and his mother said.

A certain form of cancer still got him.


All that fancy learning didnt teach em to avoid the jungle.

level 69 memelord

  • Unperson
  • *****
  • Posts: 586
  • Emo Tablecloth Salesman
  • Awards old Wounded Multiple Times in the Line of Posting Murderer Ambien posting Californian DeVry Lithuanian
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5335 on: September 05, 2018, 04:11:43 PM »
+5
Remember, guys. Gang members have a code. They only shoot each other!

https://abcnews.go.com/US/killed-hours-city-mother-phd-student-fatally-shot/story?id=57590455

Quote
A Northwestern University doctoral student who beat cancer was one of six people shot to death over the weekend in Chicago, gunned down by a stray bullet when he walked into the middle of a gunfight just four hours after arriving in the city to start school, police and his mother said.

A certain form of cancer still got him.


All that fancy learning didnt teach em to avoid the jungle.

Quote
Tonya Colombo said her son had just arrived in Chicago to live with his fiancé, Vincent Perez.

lmbo
Trigger warning: the second video contains powerful audio of the man’s fragmented urine stream.

Yankees are Scum

  • Unperson
  • *****
  • Posts: 891
  • Awards White Chick Wounded Multiple Times in the Line of Posting United Statesian Fuck you, dad! You can't know! 420
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5336 on: September 05, 2018, 10:26:03 PM »
+4
http://www.wymt.com/content/news/Woman-steals-calculator-peace-lillies-among-other-things-during-burglary-492443431.html

Pikeville must have a bad batch going around too. Lol what in the fuck is with the crackheads in Ky stealing worthless,dumb shit?

Ky Man Vs Florida Man,who would win?

asip

  • Cishet White Male
  • ******
  • Posts: 1560
  • Awards Wounded in the line of posting. Motorcyclist United Statesian Deplorables You Shall Not Pass!
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5337 on: September 06, 2018, 03:12:09 PM »
+5
 KY man is stronger but FL man doesn't feel pain. Tough to say

Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0

  • 5000 Posters Club
  • Fagmin
  • *
  • Posts: 8776
  • We don't need another hero
  • Awards Metal Fan Classicist Took Down an Admin You're Great...No, YOU'RE Great! old Took down a Moderator Something Wonderful Goon or Ex-Goon TNE Veteran Sasstronaut United Statesian Bah Jaysus!
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5338 on: September 16, 2018, 09:34:17 AM »
+7
https://amp.cnn.com/cnn/2018/09/16/americas/mexico-mariachi-shooting-garibaldi/index.html

Quote
Dozens of mariachi bands were serenading couples and families in Mexico City when five men disguised as musicians unleashed a hail of gunfire.

Five people were killed and several others were wounded Friday after a group of men wearing traditional mariachi suits descended on the city's iconic Plaza Garibaldi and opened fire at a restaurant, the city's prosecutor's office said.

Police found three people dead and two others were taken to hospitals where they later died. The victims were identified as three men and two women whose ages ranged from 22 to 46, officials said.

A foreigner, who was not identified, was among the eight others who were wounded, the prosecutor's office said.

The gunmen fled on motorcycles after the shooting, officials say, and were still on the run as of Saturday night.

Good to see Banderas and Rodriguez are working together again.

Dr. Hatchet-Wound

  • Cishet White Male
  • ******
  • Posts: 2193
  • Head, Dangerous & Elective surgery Mazzoni Center
  • Awards Drinkin' and Postin' Libertarian 420 Scrooge The Gentry cold, dead hands Goon or Ex-Goon Better dead than red old United Statesian
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5339 on: September 16, 2018, 11:03:55 AM »
+8
I can think of only one dude bad enough to go up against mariachi mass-shooters



Social Anthropoid

  • Cishet White Male
  • ******
  • Posts: 1524
  • アメリカを再び偉大にしよう
  • Awards Anonymous Sasstronaut Faggot Deplorables Autistic Killed in the Line of Posting Goon or Ex-Goon
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #5340 on: September 19, 2018, 11:59:08 PM »
+5
AP: Federal agency says it lost track of 1,488 migrant children

https://www.apnews.com/aad956b7281f4057aaac1ef4b5732f12

heil hitler
nah im a
white wow