The Wow Thread

[Rape Artist]

OK there should be a thread for concentrated mockery of mentally ill goons butchering themselves and egging each other on to take hormones because obviously they were born in the wrong body and the only therapy they need is sweet sweet estrogen.

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3447636

The latest LOL is two pages of goons literally butchering themselves while trying to shave their legs:

Horror story time.  First time shaving my legs was an overwhelming disaster.  I was aware of the need to put gel on it before, but hopeless with the whole aftercare thing.  Basically, since I was staying in student digs at the time, my hair follicles got infected with a really nasty staph strain that I'm still kinda dealing with intermittently about 3 years on.

So for god's sake be careful.

Oh, getting infections from not properly dealing with ingrown hairs is definitely a thing, especially in the student germ factories.

I get cut at least once on each shaving attempt but I'll admit to being incredibly clumsy.
Oddly enough I almost never cut myself shaving my face, the only thing I can guess is that I'm in the wrong position.

One of my first times leg-shaving I cut one of my knees very, very badly to the point that now I have a scar where it was.

Yeah, cuts only really happy for me if I start pressing harder to get a closer shave. Irritation is still a big problem if I do it frequently, since thick hair fucking sucks.

One of the first few times I shaved my legs, I did the whole process (electric razor first, then shaving with gel, then moisturizing). I did a light stroke up from just above the ankle and... Gash. I think some people's bodies just won't cooperate.

I actually have a really huge scar on my right shin from my first big shaving attempt. It was kind of freaky because it turns out blood flows a shitload in water and I was freaking out about it because it looked like so much.

That's why I epilate instead since I get a nasty cut every single time I try to shave.

[reactionary]

One of the first few times I shaved my legs, I did the whole process (electric razor first, then shaving with gel, then moisturizing). I did a light stroke up from just above the ankle and... Gash. I think some people's bodies just won't cooperate.

Why doesn't my body work like a woman's? DOESN'T IT KNOW THAT DEEP DOWN I AM A WOMAN??

[Mailorder Divorcee]

How the fuck do you get an infection from shaving? No matter what part of your body it is...

How are these people still alive?

[Rape Artist]

How the fuck do you get an infection from shaving? No matter what part of your body it is...

How are these people still alive?

A staph infection that lasts for THREE YEARS

[Mailorder Divorcee]

A staph infection that lasts for THREE YEARS

There's no excuse for that shit unless you're living homeless on the streets of Sierra Leone.

[A Fierce Woman of Size]

These guys must be really uncoordinated, preteens shave their legs and they dont get staph infections

[Agly]

You have to live in fucking filth to get a staph infection from shaving. If you have clean hot water and a clean razor, no cut you get from shaving should ever give you any kind of infection.
And here's another one, these fucking hambeasts want to be smooth skinned ladies and all this shit, but can't get the job done without slicing the shit out of themselves, and are also too fucking stupid to try waxing. Maybe it's because they are giant fucking pussies and waxing hurts, or it represents some form of female oppression, but seriously, if you can't manage to fucking shave without slicing yourself up, maybe you shouldn't be allowed to have a razor.

[whatthedickesisthis]

...these fucking hambeasts... can't get the job done without slicing the shit out of themselves

tgoons self serving in all kinds of ways 

"shit I'm hungry again /chops left testicle off"
 
 

[bunnybean]

Somebody please go in there and recommend wax; I want these guys to feel the true pain of being a woman if they're so inept at shaving that they can't do it without nearly killing themselves off via infection


I mean how the fuck do you manage that? I don't remember any little girls from middle school dropping dead from using a razor for the first time

[Huffington Post]

well they sucked at being men and now they're sucking at being women too.

[Patriarchy]

I was going to say "why not wax?". I mean if you're so incompetent that you can't shave yourself without getting a staph infection, try a different method.

[Rape Artist]

I was going to say "why not wax?". I mean if you're so incompetent that you can't shave yourself without getting a staph infection, try a different method.

Goons would somehow tear their skin off.

They could go to a waxing salon instead but that would involve pain, money, and interacting with another human.

[Troon Holocaust Apathy]

I was going to say "why not wax?". I mean if you're so incompetent that you can't shave yourself without getting a staph infection, try a different method.

Goons would somehow tear their skin off.

They could go to a waxing salon instead but that would involve pain, money, and interacting with another human.

Hey, go get your balls waxed.

Then you'll understand why these "women" don't want to do it.

[Rape Artist]

I was going to say "why not wax?". I mean if you're so incompetent that you can't shave yourself without getting a staph infection, try a different method.

Goons would somehow tear their skin off.

They could go to a waxing salon instead but that would involve pain, money, and interacting with another human.

Hey, go get your balls waxed.

Then you'll understand why these "women" don't want to do it.

I actually have had my balls and crack waxed, lots of times. I dated an aesthetician for a couple years and she gave me freebie manzillians.

It does hurt but it's over in a few minutes, and the results are glorious.

[Patriarchy]

In response to some talking head saying something about not wanting trans males using the womens bathroom.

Fucking privileged bigot. Look I have to either choose between paying for my hormones or my diapers. I can't afford both. I hope he feels high and mighty in his clean, un-soiled pants.

[Dental Grade Dildo]

I was going to say "why not wax?". I mean if you're so incompetent that you can't shave yourself without getting a staph infection, try a different method.

Goons would somehow tear their skin off.

They could go to a waxing salon instead but that would involve pain, money, and interacting with another human.

Hey, go get your balls waxed.

Then you'll understand why these "women" don't want to do it.

I actually have had my balls and crack waxed, lots of times. I dated an aesthetician for a couple years and she gave me freebie manzillians.

It does hurt but it's over in a few minutes, and the results are glorious.

Does the regrowth itch less compared to the regrowth after shaving? Because that part is the fucking worst.

[Rape Artist]

I'm a gamer girl, tee-hee!

[dolonium]

In response to some talking head saying something about not wanting trans males using the womens bathroom.

Fucking privileged bigot. Look I have to either choose between paying for my hormones or my diapers. I can't afford both. I hope he feels high and mighty in his clean, un-soiled pants.

[SomethingAwfulIsOk]

The troon thread always switches between boring as hell and funny (and disturbing) as shit. Having you guys quoting me the non-boring parts is always great. Keep up the good work 

[Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0]

You have to live in fucking filth to get a staph infection from shaving. If you have clean hot water and a clean razor, no cut you get from shaving should ever give you any kind of infection.
And here's another one, these fucking hambeasts want to be smooth skinned ladies and all this shit, but can't get the job done without slicing the shit out of themselves, and are also too fucking stupid to try waxing. Maybe it's because they are giant fucking pussies and waxing hurts, or it represents some form of female oppression, but seriously, if you can't manage to fucking shave without slicing yourself up, maybe you shouldn't be allowed to have a razor.

...or maybe you should. 

[OSI]

I guess if shaving is hard for goons Benny the snake would be dead in a week if he went troon.

[Rape Artist]

Does the regrowth itch less compared to the regrowth after shaving? Because that part is the fucking worst.

Nope doesn't itch at all.

[Agly]

I'm a gamer girl, tee-hee!

Look at the forehead on that thing. Seriously. That is a giant fucking melon. It's like a massive potato someone carved an unhappy face into. Man or woman this person must have a fucking iron girder neck to support that thing, it's one step away from being hydrocephalic.

[Rape Artist]

I'm a gamer girl, tee-hee!

Look at the forehead on that thing. Seriously. That is a giant fucking melon. It's like a massive potato someone carved an unhappy face into. Man or woman this person must have a fucking iron girder neck to support that thing, it's one step away from being hydrocephalic.

doesn't help that it's balding

[Oogploont Woozoord]

Love that forehead