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Author Topic: Cracked going the way of SA, SJW pozzing up humor all over the place  (Read 206312 times)

cis scum 1.0

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I tend to check them out pretty regularly, often every morning while commuting or getting coffee. They usually have at least one article or two that are interesting, and some of them can be pretty funny sometimes. For the most part they also seemed immune to most of SJW funkill that has been going around on the internet in the last couple of years.

Well, that is, until a little while ago. First article I really noticed that went full SJW :madgoon: was this article '6 sexist video game problems even bigger than breasts' which was filled with feminist bullshit about video games (that the person writing obviously hadn't played, they apparently got so many basic things wrong). Cracked readers overwhelmingly rioted in the comments, the article wasn't signed and they just raged at how stupid, innacurate and full of SJW bullshit it was. I think it's their most commented on article, and even two months later people are still bitching about it in the comments.

Then there was an article about 'problematic' Halloween costumes (apparently wearing a chinaman outfit makes you a racist you should DIE) and another one about the bad MRAs and the darn friendzone and other shit like that has been slowly trickling in the last three months, at a faster and faster pace.

today they've hit overload with not one but three fucking articles that are just ridiculous unfunny uninformative SJW bullshit pieces. First, "7 things no one tells you about being homeless", a 'Quick Fix' called "4 Bigots using 'Science' to further their dumbass theories" and finally another regular article called "4 Friend Zone Cheat Codes (according to the internet)"

The homeless article (epitomed by :christina:) might be the most pernicious one of all, because under the umbrella of 'educating' people, it's all SJW bullshit from a white guy who ended up in that position because of his own damn stupidity. The guy had a contract where he had to spend one week at his job, then he had a week off and went back to his apartment. Three months in, turns out that he gets evicted without a notice. Now, instead of:

1) Suing the shit out of his landlord for evicting them without a notice, which is illegal
2) Using his money to rent a room somewhere

he instead became homeless for months and started to do LSD and live in the woods. what the fuck. The main reason why people are homeless is because they don't have a source of income, which is how they could be able to afford a place and to eat and all of these things in the first place. Not only did he have a job, it was a job where he only needed an apartment two weeks out of four. Shit, if he wanted to he could have commuted four or five hours to get to his job and then back to his new place, who gives a shit? He has a full week off, it's not like he needs to drive there every day, just once every two weeks.

Nope, like a goony motherfucker he went to live in the woods and started doing LSD and then pontificates about how homeless people have it hard and how they don't know how it is like he does.

Stupid motherfucker mentions how one of the first few things he did was to buy a stove to cook himself a meal, and it cost him $150. $150 for a fucking mini-stove. That works with gas, that he had to pay for. I mean, how else could he eat warm food on such a budget? Buy microwavable shit and use a gas station microwave to heat it up? Buy food that he could eat without having to eat it up?

I mean even if you're in fucking between paychecks and don't have the money RIGHT NOW to rent a room somewhere (where you'll only be there half the time anyway) he couldn't just call his family and say 'Uh well I'm about to be homeless, can you Western Union me $300 so I can pay upfront for a room, I'm getting my paycheck in a couple of weeks and I'll pay you then"? Shit, motherfucker could have simply sucked it up, lived in his truck for a week, went back to work then get a place when he came back with more money. But nope, living in the woods and becoming a junkie was the only option.Who the fuck thinks "I am so bored, I need to do LSD"? Such a pathetic excuse. It's not like having an apartment in that town would suddenly means he'd be so busy he wouldn't do drugs. He'd still have 7 days in a row without anything concrete to do. I wish I could see a picture of what that guy looks like, because I bet he looks like a limp-wristed goony faggot.



Quick Fix articles, for those who don't know, are supposed to be short lists of funny or weird or gross things, basically a quick and interesting read. While the four examples chosen there are obviously stupid, it's just fucking outraged 'LOOK WHAT THOSE PEOPLE BELEIVE AND HOW THEY BELITTLE SCIENCE!!' Bet you'll never see 'Trannies' on the list of people who abuse science in the name of bigotry (my womanpenis, my womansperm, cotton ceiling, female brain, etc...)

And, well the other one about the Friend Zone is just about those redditMRAbronies guys and how dare they! I couldn't bring myself to read all of it either, just stopped after I read this in the opening of the article:

Quote
You'll note that I'm keeping this advice gender-neutral, because despite how creepily male-oriented the available literature is, love can go unrequited in both directions.

:razor: :dinorage: :razor:
« Last Edit: July 24, 2015, 10:57:00 AM by This Swift Monostat Alt »

cis scum 1.0

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its not that I care so much about cracked or anything, it just seems that slowly but surely every single website I go to is becoming more and more pozzed up by SJWs, either internally or being forced by outside forces to self-censor in order to not suffer their wrath.

i mean I don't even watch Conan O'Brian but apparently now making a joke about a muslim woman superhero saying she has 'so many more powers than her husband's other wives' is worthy of boycott and flagellation on the public scene.

what the fuck is happening, how the fuck can it become impossible to make jokes about everything but white republican heteronormative american reddit MRA pua bronies anymore?

I half expect that to become the new bond villain at this point, what the fuck is going on and why is everything become so pozzed up so fast everywhere?

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Cracked's downward spiral started happening years ago when David Wong became head editor there. David Wong was previously the owner of a site called pointlesswasteoftime which I used to read, it was the same sort of dumb 2000s internet comedy that Something Awful was at the time. He also wrote a comedy horror novel called John Dies at the End which was well received and somewhat successful on the internet for a while- there was an indie film made based on it that was on Netflix for a while.

David Wong and John Cheese are friends and at some point they both became pozzed and you can tell they started feeding off each other. John Cheese is the one who used to be "poor" (actually just a goony nerd in a white trash marriage) and Wong apparently became feminist along the way as well.

I'll admit I found Cracked funny a long time ago but it's been completely devoid of humor for the past few years.
There is no "knee jerk reaction". You're a fucking idiot. Personally, I find Jews annoying and kind of gross. But the whole pseudoscience/historical revisionism thing is retarded as shit. I know you assume I must love jews, but you know what? I don't really give a shit about jews one way or another. Look at my posts retard. You say I'm defending Jews. But I'm not. I'm not posting about how great they are, how much I love them, how they should be accepted, or any of that. I never have Not once. I'm taking exception with retarded claims that are easily debunked and/or never backed up. I am objecting to the retarded "logic". But every time I do, someone jumps uo and assumes that I looooooove jews. Now, THAT'S a knee-jerk reaction. Pull your head out of your ass faggot.

There is a mountain of irrefutable, reviewed and supported statistical evidence that shows without a doubt that niggers are fucking terrible. As for Jews, there's just a lot of unsupported pseudoscientific bullshit. If you don't see how that is different, you are stupid as fuck.

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Never read cracked.

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I gave up on Cracked a few years ago when I realized it was all clickbait list humor.

HERE'S 6 FUNNY THINGS!
*click*
1. Funny thing
2. Funny thing
CLICK HERE FOR 3-4!


:lolno:
Get rid of the notion that an eleven year old cannot be stronger than you, I had a kid of similar age do this to be when I was 16 and your size. I'm pretty sure he was stronger than me, this kid is almost certainly stronger than you.

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i read the daily caller because the writers dont take themselves too seriously and they arent pozzed

they are also appropriately outraged when trannies are in the wrong bathroom
« Last Edit: November 12, 2013, 08:04:26 PM by wimpb »

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its not that I care so much about cracked or anything, it just seems that slowly but surely every single website I go to is becoming more and more pozzed up by SJWs, either internally or being forced by outside forces to self-censor in order to not suffer their wrath.

i mean I don't even watch Conan O'Brian but apparently now making a joke about a muslim woman superhero saying she has 'so many more powers than her husband's other wives' is worthy of boycott and flagellation on the public scene.

what the fuck is happening, how the fuck can it become impossible to make jokes about everything but white republican heteronormative american reddit MRA pua bronies anymore?

I half expect that to become the new bond villain at this point, what the fuck is going on and why is everything become so pozzed up so fast everywhere?

I go to Cracked maybe twice a week and I've noticed it getting worse too. There are people complaining in the comments here and there, but there are also people trying to shout them down and I think we all know how this is going to end.

And speaking of "white republican heteronormative american etc.", my girlfriend watches that show The Blacklist on NBC - it's fucking terrible, like pretty much everything else NBC has done for years - and I've slowly picked up on the trend that seemingly every week the evil criminal is a white guy. Somebody is poisoning entire subway cars full of people? White guy. Somebody is kidnapping and killing witnesses before federal trials? White guy. Somebody is setting off bombs on airplanes? White guy.

I'm tired of all these white, American terrorists setting off bombs on planes and in the subways and smuggling dirty bombs into the country. It happens all the time. :lolno:

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Maybe we should start a cracked forum here at SS?
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I've slowly picked up on the trend that seemingly every week the evil criminal is a white guy. Somebody is poisoning entire subway cars full of people? White guy. Somebody is kidnapping and killing witnesses before federal trials? White guy. Somebody is setting off bombs on airplanes? White guy.


To be fair, all of those are crimes that require a lot of premeditation, planning and effort. When the shoe fits...

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these things happen. remember all the hooplah in the 90s about the terrible influences of the Simpsons and Married with Children having on the public? it's a phase that society goes through.

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huh wonder if they squeezed out seanbaby since he refuses to be pc
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I gave up on Cracked a few years ago when I realized it was all clickbait list humor.

HERE'S 6 FUNNY THINGS!
*click*
1. Funny thing
2. Funny thing
CLICK HERE FOR 3-4!


:lolno:

there's this


Cracked's downward spiral started happening years ago when David Wong became head editor there. David Wong was previously the owner of a site called pointlesswasteoftime which I used to read, it was the same sort of dumb 2000s internet comedy that Something Awful was at the time. He also wrote a comedy horror novel called John Dies at the End which was well received and somewhat successful on the internet for a while- there was an indie film made based on it that was on Netflix for a while.

David Wong and John Cheese are friends and at some point they both became pozzed and you can tell they started feeding off each other. John Cheese is the one who used to be "poor" (actually just a goony nerd in a white trash marriage) and Wong apparently became feminist along the way as well.

I'll admit I found Cracked funny a long time ago but it's been completely devoid of humor for the past few years.

and this is kinda close, but i think you're blaming wong too much.

wong's books are enjoyable and fun (although the 2nd one got a bit rough at the end, without John dying and all that).  what i think is that wong is paying far more attention to that side of the biz and much less to the website.  can't blame him tbh.

that means that he either outsources most of his responsibilities by hiring new writers or cheese is doing more of the heavy lifting.  probably a bit of both. but after enough time, there are only so many ideas you can have for list-icles.  and add to that knowing that the internet is full of morons that couldn't make a fart joke in a bean factory, but that won't stop them from submitting shitty ideas to cracked about "top six reasons you should take a tranny on a date". 

in a lot of ways, it's like the simpsons.  the original writers were great, and there was several seasons worth of material for them to explore.  but after the top talent moves on, and the format doesn't reinvent itself, you're left with 2nd or 3rd rate fill-ins and re-runs. at this point, they need to hibernate for a while, let the PC crap build up and then reinvent themselves as a counter-PC site and shiv all that SJW crap in the shower to let it bleed out.


Goddamnit E/N.

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and this is kinda close, but i think you're blaming wong too much.

wong's books are enjoyable and fun (although the 2nd one got a bit rough at the end, without John dying and all that).  what i think is that wong is paying far more attention to that side of the biz and much less to the website.  can't blame him tbh.

I don't know if you were referring to something in This Book is Full of Spiders, but John Dies at the End was the first book, not the second.  The second book sucked, though.  It was like Wong decided that people liking the articles he wrote about SERIOUS ISSUES way back when (which were pretty good imo) meant that he should try to incorporate SERIOUS ISSUES into his new book.  Nothing terribly SJW or political, just hamfisted and stupid shit about John's alcoholism and the nature of evil or whatever.

And yeah, I haven't read Cracked since maybe the day after that shitty video games article, I think it was actually an article by Dan O'Brien that killed it for me, it basically boiled down to "Hey guys, stop trying so hard to have sex!"
Quote
I have wrestled with the nigger demon in a number of ways.


For people who consider themselves feminists they have even more rules for how a woman should think and act than the fucking Taliban.

https://radishmag.wordpress.com/2014/02/14/pump-and-dump/

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i still remember the monkeysphere article from pwot that got me interested in psychology for about six minutes

which one wrote that
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Cracked's downward spiral started happening years ago when David Wong became head editor there. David Wong was previously the owner of a site called pointlesswasteoftime which I used to read, it was the same sort of dumb 2000s internet comedy that Something Awful was at the time. He also wrote a comedy horror novel called John Dies at the End which was well received and somewhat successful on the internet for a while- there was an indie film made based on it that was on Netflix for a while.

David Wong and John Cheese are friends and at some point they both became pozzed and you can tell they started feeding off each other. John Cheese is the one who used to be "poor" (actually just a goony nerd in a white trash marriage) and Wong apparently became feminist along the way as well.

I'll admit I found Cracked funny a long time ago but it's been completely devoid of humor for the past few years.

I don't think pointlesswasteoftime was like old SA at all. dude seemed far less childish and actually wrote about insightful stuff (albeit comedically) instead of poison wombs making heaven too fucking crowded. he directed some pretty legit realtalk at internet spergs like 'spending all day on the internet filtering out all negativity and annoyance will turn you into a manchild with no ability to handle the real world' along with taking a very reasonable middle ground during the mid-2000s video game violence shitstorm.

he actually seems pretty intelligent and level-headed most of the time, even today, with one of his articles actually having a view of the world that would seem like 'bootstraps bullshit' to SA.
he also pretty much admitted that he votes republican all the time !!!AND!!! he called out DocEvil on Twitter for his retarded "SAVE TRAYVON FUCK THE WHITE MAN" bullshit and made him and his goon fans respond in a really butthurt mean-spirted way.

...........so it's fucking silly that he wrote this stupid fucking article http://www.cracked.com/article_19785_5-ways-modern-men-are-trained-to-hate-women.html because it's not only him projecting his own idiotic misogyny and sex-obsession over all men, but also going against his own earlier and later 'work hard and stop whining' comments; if women are THIS insanely oppressed, practically enslaved by men in the western world, that would contradict his worldviews hugely. he also retweets Anita Sarkeesian on Twitter for 'see I'm not a bigot despite being a rethuglikkkan!' points.

it's really lame because he actually seems like a decent guy who's embracing this stuff purely to fit in with Cracked's moronic community.
Quote
i still remember the monkeysphere article from pwot that got me interested in psychology for about six minutes

which one wrote that

yeah, that was a good one. Wong wrote it. see?

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Last time I laughed at Cracked was when the local Skaggs Albersons was out of Mad Magazine.
"If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen."


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and this is kinda close, but i think you're blaming wong too much.

wong's books are enjoyable and fun (although the 2nd one got a bit rough at the end, without John dying and all that).  what i think is that wong is paying far more attention to that side of the biz and much less to the website.  can't blame him tbh.

I don't know if you were referring to something in This Book is Full of Spiders, but John Dies at the End was the first book, not the second.  The second book sucked, though.  It was like Wong decided that people liking the articles he wrote about SERIOUS ISSUES way back when (which were pretty good imo) meant that he should try to incorporate SERIOUS ISSUES into his new book.  Nothing terribly SJW or political, just hamfisted and stupid shit about John's alcoholism and the nature of evil or whatever.

And yeah, I haven't read Cracked since maybe the day after that shitty video games article, I think it was actually an article by Dan O'Brien that killed it for me, it basically boiled down to "Hey guys, stop trying so hard to have sex!"

sorry, i worded that awkwardly making the connection back to JDATE.  yeah, JDATE was first, and spiders was the follow-up.  spiders just kinda fell apart, like it was trying to recapture the fever-dream, episodic nature of JDATE.  i even liked the JDATE movie, for what it was; it didn't aim too high and wasn't afraid to pick only certain of the stories to tell.  although i wish they included the bit about the sportscaster being possessed and ranting on live TV.


Goddamnit E/N.

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Oh also: Cracked has been like this for eons. There was a 'sexist comic book heroine outfits' article with a 'top 10 bullshit defenses of sexist super heroine outfits' follow-up based on the comments section for the first article. Then he hypocritically admitted that he loves THIS comic http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empowered which is practically softcore porn by a guy who obviously jacks off to anime tits and the idiots on the forum justified it as "oh no, it's satire of our objectifying culture".

And this was like a year or more ago.

So I dunno where you've been all this time.

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I gave up on Cracked a few years ago when I realized it was all clickbait list humor.

HERE'S 6 FUNNY THINGS!
*click*
1. Funny thing
2. Funny thing
CLICK HERE FOR 3-4!


:lolno:

Bleecher Report pulls the same shit

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Sean "Seanbaby" Reiley is probably the only reason I would read Cracked (his articles).

I wonder how ol' Sean would fare if his "friend" Miguel started fat chicks in party hats today?  :allears:

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The only Cracked writer I ever enjoyed was that Jacopo something guy who basically finds a ton of cool little stories from history, mostly on Wikipedia. Seanbaby is alright, Wong's pop-psych gives regular pop-psych a bad name.

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lol why are you taking Buchols stuff seriously. the friend zone article was satire or some shit

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Pretty easy to figure out that making listicles about SJW issues make more money.  A lot of sites are employing this model, which is why we're seeing such pozzed news sites.  The unemployed tumblr masses is a pretty big internet demographic.

SJWs are unemployed and a demographic target that people are not going to want to target in the first place. If SJWs were such a great market and way to boost revenues, SA wouldn't be in the dire straits that it is.

You're conflating 'vocal minority' with 'customer base that creates ad clicks'. That's also why I don't get what's happening, the best way to alienate most of your user base and make leave is by upping up the SJW shit until they can't take it anymore. It's like sacrificing your son to an idol to get 25% less on your paycheck. Doesn't make any fucking sense.

And speaking of "white republican heteronormative american etc.", my girlfriend watches that show The Blacklist on NBC - it's fucking terrible, like pretty much everything else NBC has done for years - and I've slowly picked up on the trend that seemingly every week the evil criminal is a white guy. Somebody is poisoning entire subway cars full of people? White guy. Somebody is kidnapping and killing witnesses before federal trials? White guy. Somebody is setting off bombs on airplanes? White guy.

I'm tired of all these white, American terrorists setting off bombs on planes and in the subways and smuggling dirty bombs into the country. It happens all the time. :lolno:

Yeah the terrorists being white thing has been going on for way longer than that. When was the last time you had a major movie where the terrorists were Muslims (and was not based on a true story)? No way you could have a movie like 'True Lies' nowadays without having screams of Islamophobia and shit. I mean look at 24. There were, what, 8 or 9 seasons of that show? Was there a single time where the terrorists were muslims AND were not being directed/duped by evil rich white (conservative) men?

these things happen. remember all the hooplah in the 90s about the terrible influences of the Simpsons and Married with Children having on the public? it's a phase that society goes through.

I hope you're right because now I'm afraid that the few tv shows I watch (comedies from FX mostly) are going to go that way. The last thing I need is Archer falling in love with a post-op tranny because she's a real woman~ or some shit.

Oh also: Cracked has been like this for eons. There was a 'sexist comic book heroine outfits' article with a 'top 10 bullshit defenses of sexist super heroine outfits' follow-up based on the comments section for the first article. Then he hypocritically admitted that he loves THIS comic http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empowered which is practically softcore porn by a guy who obviously jacks off to anime tits and the idiots on the forum justified it as "oh no, it's satire of our objectifying culture".

And this was like a year or more ago.

So I dunno where you've been all this time.

I don't read articles about comic books, that's why some of those articles probably flew by me, mostly read the shit about history, movies and music. Don't really give a shit about video games or comics or other manchildren pursuits tbh

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He fell in love with a post-robot-op commie, that's pretty close.

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I don't think pointlesswasteoftime was like old SA at all. dude seemed far less childish and actually wrote about insightful stuff (albeit comedically) instead of poison wombs making heaven too fucking crowded.

I might be misremembering then- the PWOT site has been down for years, he didn't even keep it open as an archive of all his old articles. The main thing I remember it for is the fake movie reviews.
There is no "knee jerk reaction". You're a fucking idiot. Personally, I find Jews annoying and kind of gross. But the whole pseudoscience/historical revisionism thing is retarded as shit. I know you assume I must love jews, but you know what? I don't really give a shit about jews one way or another. Look at my posts retard. You say I'm defending Jews. But I'm not. I'm not posting about how great they are, how much I love them, how they should be accepted, or any of that. I never have Not once. I'm taking exception with retarded claims that are easily debunked and/or never backed up. I am objecting to the retarded "logic". But every time I do, someone jumps uo and assumes that I looooooove jews. Now, THAT'S a knee-jerk reaction. Pull your head out of your ass faggot.

There is a mountain of irrefutable, reviewed and supported statistical evidence that shows without a doubt that niggers are fucking terrible. As for Jews, there's just a lot of unsupported pseudoscientific bullshit. If you don't see how that is different, you are stupid as fuck.