Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:32 PM]: I remember once after a show someone asked me "Wow, so you just make that all up on the spot when you go up?"
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:34 PM]: No you stupid nigger I poured over every single word and cadence and bit of timing, I rewrote most of those jokes 12+ times to cut the fat and maximize the laughs, and everything down to my smallest facial expressions and when I take a shot after what joke was carefully thought out. You. Dumb. Nigger.
Theoretically Offended [01|Apr 05:34 PM]: BUT IT'S JUST TELLING JOKES, AGENT
Theoretically Offended [01|Apr 05:34 PM]: HOW COULD THAT BE HARD
Theoretically Offended [01|Apr 05:35 PM]: It's like writing. People think it's just sitting down and coming up with bullshit and spewing it onto a page.
Carbpoole [01|Apr 05:35 PM]: Throw some bones, three minutes, something to work with.
Theoretically Offended [01|Apr 05:35 PM]: But there's a lot of painstaking effort that goes into creative works. Like, actual, good creative works.
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:35 PM]: Well like, okay. Let me try to put my money where my mouth is.
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:36 PM]: Sometimes I like to challenge myself by taking a common saying or idiom, and then making that the setup, and try to write the best possible punchline for it. Its a writing exercize
Carbpoole [01|Apr 05:36 PM]: It's not a cock, is it?
Theoretically Offended [01|Apr 05:36 PM]: Granted as I've only done some short stories on the interwebs I think I'm pretty far down on the totem pole compared to you, Agent.
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:36 PM]: For example, once I took "Every time God closes a door he opens a window" and sat trying to come up with a funny punchline
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:37 PM]: The best one was "...and then Eric Clapton writes a real sad song about it"
Theoretically Offended [01|Apr 05:37 PM]: Heh.
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:37 PM]: So go ahead and pick out a common saying or idiom of your choice, something 95% of people have heard before, pick it and I'll try to write some punchlines for it.
Theoretically Offended [01|Apr 05:38 PM]: Swallow your pride
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:38 PM]: Okay so my first instinct was a blowjob joke
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:38 PM]: BUT
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:38 PM]: that would be a hack's first instinct
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:38 PM]: and he would just go with it
Carbpoole [01|Apr 05:39 PM]: Last time I picked an idiom I got blasted. Not much of a joke about a niggerdeath forum hating grammar. Or maybe?...
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:39 PM]: I want it to be something they wouldn't see coming.
Theoretically Offended [01|Apr 05:39 PM]: I'll admit I would've been a bit disappointed if you'd gone with a blowjob joke.
Theoretically Offended [01|Apr 05:39 PM]: Especially considering I'm painfully bad at comedy and even I thought of that.
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:39 PM]: Yeah there has got to be something better
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:39 PM]: I'm thinking
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:40 PM]: So now I'm thinking of a joke that might revolve around me being so arrogant I'd choke on it
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:40 PM]: Which is a little less predictable but not by much
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:41 PM]: GOT IT
Carbpoole [01|Apr 05:42 PM]: Nah, tell your joke.
Carbpoole [01|Apr 05:43 PM]: I've got plenty of good stories about immigrants, some that have been called "funniest story ever" by people, but I can't tell stories like that.
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:43 PM]: I believe its important to swallow your pride. Also swallow your charm, wit, bravery, willingness to get in fistfights, and ability to fuck ugly chicks. Look what I'm trying to say is I'm an alcoholic.
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:43 PM]: There, thats a good enough joke to tell onstage. I did it.
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:43 PM]: Yay
Theoretically Offended [01|Apr 05:44 PM]: I actually laughed out loud at that.
Theoretically Offended [01|Apr 05:44 PM]: Now I want to see one of your shows.
Agent Provodkateur [01|Apr 05:46 PM]: I remember hearing some famous musician say something like "It took me decades to learn which notes NOT to play". It applies just as much to jokewriting imo. That easy blowjob joke was just sitting there and its temping to go for it and be lazy, which is why I mentioned it was my immediate first go-to, which means its the shortest and thus laziest route.