;

Author Topic: Funny Shit From The News  (Read 100548 times)

BubbaCat

  • Cishet White Male
  • Fagmin
  • *
  • Posts: 1607
  • Machiavellian House Negro
  • Awards old Something Wonderful Anonymous Sasstronaut Goon or Ex-Goon TNE Veteran
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #25 on: August 30, 2012, 10:38:27 AM »
0
http://www.sunnewsnetwork.ca/sunnews/world/archives/2012/08/20120828-121108.html

Quote
A Nebraska preschool is asking a three-year-old deaf boy to change his name because it violates the school board's weapons policy.

Hunter Spanjer signs his first name by making what looks like shooting gestures with both hands. He crosses his fingers when he does it - a modification to show it's his proper name.

But the Grand Island Public Schools board says its "Weapons in Schools" policy bans "any instrument ... that looks like a weapon." The school wants him to change the sign, a request Hunter's family says is both unfair and silly.

"Anybody that I have talked to thinks this is absolutely ridiculous. This is not threatening in any way," Hunter's grandmother Janet Logue told local news station 1011.

"It's a symbol. It's an actual sign, a registered sign," said Hunter's father, Brian Spanjer.
The school board wants to work out a compromise.

"We are working with the parents to come to the best solution we can for the child," said school board spokesman Jack Sheard.

But the Spanjers say they aren't interested. They're bringing in lawyers from the National Association of the Deaf to fight for their son's right to sign his own name.

Meanwhile, local residents told the station the school is overreacting and that Hunter poses no danger.

lol that kid is awesome

"Hey kid what's your name?"
*makes a finger gun*



Now that was just downright offensive and breaks somethingsensitive.com policy.  You hit both my white-guilt trigger and my columbine trigger.  My therapist is not going to be happy about this.

wimpb

  • Guest
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #26 on: August 30, 2012, 09:38:06 PM »
0
Not news, but didn't know where to put this and I didn't want to start a new thread:

wimpb

  • Guest
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #27 on: August 30, 2012, 09:50:10 PM »
0
http://dailycaller.com/2012/08/30/new-frontiers-in-hypersensitvity-state-department-officer-says-holding-down-the-fort-is-racist/

Did you know talking is racist? - a nigger, employed with your tax dollars

Quote
John M. Robinson, the Chief Diversity Officer at the U.S. Department of State, wants America’s diplomats to know that common phrases and idioms like “holding down the fort” are, in fact, deeply racist.

Robinson, who also serves as director of the Department’s Office of Civil Rights, used his “Diversity Notes” feature in the July/August issue of the official “State Magazine” to examine the hateful roots of everyday sayings. In one recent public relations kerfuffle at Nike, Inc., he wrote, the company torpedoed a sneaker called the “Black and Tan.”

“What a wonderful celebratory gesture and appreciation for Irish culture. Not!” wrote Robinson, an adult.

Robinson notes that “Black and Tan,” in addition to being an enjoyably robust alcoholic concoction, can refer to the brutal Protestant militiamen who ravaged the Irish countryside in the early 20th century — which is why Irish bartenders always get so upset when you order one.

In an effort to avoid offending those notoriously fragile Irish sensibilities, Nike pulled the shoe from stores.

Robinson would like us all to learn from the sneaker company’s inadvertent racism and really start watching what we say. For example, did you know “going Dutch” is a reference to Netherlanders’ apparently well-known parsimoniousness, and that your widowed neighbor, sweet old Mrs. Rasmussen, cries every time she hears you use it?

And did you know using the phrase “holding down the fort” is the linguistic equivalent of scalping a Cherokee? According to Robinson, the phrase dates back to American soldiers on the western frontier who wanted to “hold down” all that land they stole.

“Handicap” and “rule of thumb” are two more figures of speech that Robsinon, in his wisdom, has decreed offensive. The latter, Robinson says, refers to the width of a stick a man could once use to legally beat his wife.

And in case you’re wondering how he could have done all the etymological detective work necessary to conclude that these phrases came from where he says they came from, and still have time to perform his Chief Diversity Officer duties at the State Department, wonder no more: Robinson doesn’t really know if any of this is true.

“Much has been written about whether the etymologies below are true or merely folklore, but this isn’t about their historical validity,” Robinson writes. “nstead, it is an opportunity to remember that our choice of wording affects our professional environment.”


Original here: http://digitaledition.state.gov/publication/?m=11956&l=1 (page 8)

High Impact Sexbot 2020

  • Cishet White Male
  • Alconauts
  • *
  • Posts: 3656
  • 18+
  • Awards Drinkin' and Postin' Killed in the Line of Posting Goon or Ex-Goon Better dead than red Strayan TNE Veteran
    • I got it in spades.
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #28 on: August 30, 2012, 09:53:53 PM »
0
And this is why we don't have a real space program anymore.

wimpb

  • Guest
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #29 on: August 30, 2012, 10:34:10 PM »
0
Remember when NASA launched the Voyager probes with a golden record with Beethoven's 9th on it?

Well the latest Mars probe played some will.i.am on Mars.

High Impact Sexbot 2020

  • Cishet White Male
  • Alconauts
  • *
  • Posts: 3656
  • 18+
  • Awards Drinkin' and Postin' Killed in the Line of Posting Goon or Ex-Goon Better dead than red Strayan TNE Veteran
    • I got it in spades.
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #30 on: August 30, 2012, 11:11:17 PM »
0
And some doof with a multicolored mohawk at the control panel.  :lolno:

Rocket

  • 5000 Posters Club
  • Cosmonauts
  • *
  • Posts: 11439
  • Don't call me a lawyer; I'll call my own!
  • Awards Fucked a lesbian You're Great...No, YOU'RE Great! old cold, dead hands Something Wonderful The Gentry Prepper Goon or Ex-Goon TNE Veteran Libertarian For Dixie's land we'll take our stand! Motorcyclist Sasstronaut Wounded in the line of posting.
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #31 on: August 31, 2012, 08:25:33 PM »
+1
It ain't mission control if it aint a bunch of chain smoking white guys with buzz cuts wearing white, short sleeve shirts, black ties and black, horn rimmed glasses.
Yes, that is me on my Rocket Cycle with my enormous penis.


High Impact Sexbot 2020

  • Cishet White Male
  • Alconauts
  • *
  • Posts: 3656
  • 18+
  • Awards Drinkin' and Postin' Killed in the Line of Posting Goon or Ex-Goon Better dead than red Strayan TNE Veteran
    • I got it in spades.
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #32 on: August 31, 2012, 08:59:37 PM »
0
It ain't mission control if it aint a bunch of chain smoking white guys with buzz cuts wearing white, short sleeve shirts, black ties and black, horn rimmed glasses.

 :reagan:

wimpb

  • Guest
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #33 on: September 02, 2012, 08:00:14 PM »
0


According to some bloggers, this is because of the new Voter ID laws in Florida...

Rocket

  • 5000 Posters Club
  • Cosmonauts
  • *
  • Posts: 11439
  • Don't call me a lawyer; I'll call my own!
  • Awards Fucked a lesbian You're Great...No, YOU'RE Great! old cold, dead hands Something Wonderful The Gentry Prepper Goon or Ex-Goon TNE Veteran Libertarian For Dixie's land we'll take our stand! Motorcyclist Sasstronaut Wounded in the line of posting.
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #34 on: September 02, 2012, 08:08:06 PM »
0
Can't see shit.
Yes, that is me on my Rocket Cycle with my enormous penis.


wimpb

  • Guest
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #35 on: September 02, 2012, 08:36:47 PM »
0
Bizarre, does this one work?

OSI

  • Cishet White Male
  • Grand Inquisitors
  • *
  • Posts: 2054
  • For Dixie's Land we'll make our stand
  • Awards TNE Veteran Classicist Arizona The Gentry cold, dead hands Prepper For Dixie's land we'll take our stand! Soldier Fascist Ave Maria
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #36 on: September 02, 2012, 08:59:22 PM »
0
And this is why we don't have a real space program anymore.

Or a coherent foreign policy beause everything is centered around getting people who check the right diversity boxes promoted.

High Impact Sexbot 2020

  • Cishet White Male
  • Alconauts
  • *
  • Posts: 3656
  • 18+
  • Awards Drinkin' and Postin' Killed in the Line of Posting Goon or Ex-Goon Better dead than red Strayan TNE Veteran
    • I got it in spades.
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #37 on: September 02, 2012, 09:27:00 PM »
0

Birk

  • Unperson
  • Fagmin
  • *
  • Posts: 768
  • Awards Generation Identitaire Drinkin' and Postin' For Dixie's land we'll take our stand! Goon or Ex-Goon TNE Veteran
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #38 on: September 21, 2012, 05:11:15 AM »
0

LITERALLY A RAPIST

  • Cishet White Male
  • Original Patients
  • *
  • Posts: 3155
  • Resident Physician and Expert Warlock
  • Awards Something Wonderful cold, dead hands Goon or Ex-Goon TNE Veteran Wounded in the line of posting.
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #39 on: October 03, 2012, 08:59:46 PM »
0
Quote
Philly student's Romney T-shirt likened to KKK sheet

By Kristen A. Graham
INQUIRER STAFF WRITER

A Philadelphia teacher allegedly likened a student's Romney T-shirt to a KKK sheet. The teacher is now under investigation.

One young woman chose to wear a shirt showing her support for Gov. Mitt Romney's presidential candidacy. Her geometry teacher didn't like it, the girl's father said on a radio call-in show on IQ 106.9 FM today.

The teacher allegedly told the girl to take off the shirt, saying it was like wearing a Ku Klux Klan sheet. The teacher allegedly threatened to use a marker to cross out Romney's name and that of Rep. Paul Ryan, his running mate. The teacher also allegedly tried to throw the student out of class.

The teacher also allegedly said that Carroll was "a Democratic school."

Her parents were livid. The student was afraid to go back to the class. She thought she would be retaliated against.

Philadelphia School District spokesman Fernando Gallard confirmed that last Friday at Carroll, "a teacher made some comments to a student wearing a Romney t-shirt in their classroom. The comments were of a political nature, and also of a personal nature. We are looking into the comments, and the conduct of the teacher."

Once the school received a complaint, an investigation was launched the same day, Gallard said. The investigation is ongoing.

In the meantime, the teacher was switched out of the class "to allow the student to feel comfortable to come to the class."

Gallard said the student was within her rights.

"She was expressing her freedom of speech, and was not in violation of any school or district policy," he said.

 

veteran of forum wars

  • Domestic Threat
  • ***
  • Posts: 216
  • This is where you fuckers went.
  • Awards Sasstronaut tfw no gf because jews Anonymous BYOB TNE Veteran Goon or Ex-Goon
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #40 on: October 07, 2012, 02:49:42 PM »
0
Idiocracy is now.
Why can't Ozma die(t) :smug:

Muttonfingers

  • Domestic Threat
  • ***
  • Posts: 139
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #41 on: October 08, 2012, 06:55:41 AM »
0
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2214364/Lineker-forced-say-sorry-Muslim-gaffe-commentary-Al-Jazeera.html?ICO=most_read_module

Quote
Lineker forced to apologise for saying Muslim players were 'eating grass' as they prayed in celebration during commentary on Al Jazeera

Gary Lineker has been forced to apologise after accidentally ridiculing two Muslim footballers during a match commentary on TV.

When the players celebrated a goal by dropping to their knees and bowing their heads in the Islamic prayer position, Lineker said they ‘ate grass’.

The gesture is often used by Muslim players to celebrate.

He was commentating on Al Jazeera TV, which is mainly aimed at audiences in the Middle East and has a huge Islamic audience.
Lineker, who is one of the BBC’s biggest faces in sport, has a clause in his contract that allows him to freelance for the other channel.

The gaffe was made during Wednesday night’s Champions League game between Schalke and Montpellier when discussing the French side’s opening goal.

He said: ‘A terrific effort from Karim Ait-Fana, who scored from just outside the area and then ate grass . . . as you do.’


High Impact Sexbot 2020

  • Cishet White Male
  • Alconauts
  • *
  • Posts: 3656
  • 18+
  • Awards Drinkin' and Postin' Killed in the Line of Posting Goon or Ex-Goon Better dead than red Strayan TNE Veteran
    • I got it in spades.
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #42 on: October 08, 2012, 07:43:33 AM »
0
Meanwhile, Tim Tebow, what a christard, amirite?  :smug:

brolonium

  • Cishet White Male
  • Alconauts
  • *
  • Posts: 3130
  • The rarest pepe
  • Awards Drinkin' and Postin'
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #43 on: October 08, 2012, 07:57:51 AM »
0
http://conservativebyte.com/2012/10/uw-madison-students-unfair-that-obama-couldnt-use-teleprompter-in-debate/

More than half the people I asked, who thought the president could have done better, said “it wasn’t fair” that President Obama was not allowed to use his teleprompter in the debate.

:razor:

Although on the other hand, if someone was deaf they'd let them have a hearing aid, and if they were blind they could bring a white stick and a dog, so I guess someone with no brain should be allowed to use their aids as well.

wimpb

  • Guest
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #44 on: October 08, 2012, 07:38:33 PM »
0
Yeah, well Obama hit back...on Nickolodeon.

http://www.tmz.com/2012/10/08/barack-obama-mitt-romeny-nickelodeon-kids-pick-president-adam-fetcher/
Quote
President Obama’s peeps say Mitt Romney is gonna be sorry for blowing off a bunch of kids who participated in the Nickelodeon show, “Kids Pick the President.”

The premise of the show — kids submit questions to each candidate and based on the answers they make their pick for leader of the free world.

Obama answered the kids’ questions, but Romney said he didn’t have the time.

Deputy National Press Secretary Adam Fetcher tells TMZ, “It’s no surprise Romney decided to play hookey. Kids demand details, and I’m sure they want some answers on why Romney could increase their class sizes, eliminate their teacher’s jobs, raise taxes on their families and slash funding for Big Bird.”

Rocket

  • 5000 Posters Club
  • Cosmonauts
  • *
  • Posts: 11439
  • Don't call me a lawyer; I'll call my own!
  • Awards Fucked a lesbian You're Great...No, YOU'RE Great! old cold, dead hands Something Wonderful The Gentry Prepper Goon or Ex-Goon TNE Veteran Libertarian For Dixie's land we'll take our stand! Motorcyclist Sasstronaut Wounded in the line of posting.
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #45 on: October 08, 2012, 10:45:16 PM »
0
I fear that Romney may have lost the voters who are influenced by children.


 :obammy:
Yes, that is me on my Rocket Cycle with my enormous penis.


High Impact Sexbot 2020

  • Cishet White Male
  • Alconauts
  • *
  • Posts: 3656
  • 18+
  • Awards Drinkin' and Postin' Killed in the Line of Posting Goon or Ex-Goon Better dead than red Strayan TNE Veteran
    • I got it in spades.
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #46 on: October 08, 2012, 11:29:41 PM »
0
I fear that Romney may have lost the voters who are influenced by children.


 :obammy:

Black people were gunna vot for bammy anyway  :smug:

wimpb

  • Guest
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #47 on: October 09, 2012, 08:57:57 PM »
0
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bZxs09eV-Vc" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bZxs09eV-Vc</a>



 :facepalm:

Birk

  • Unperson
  • Fagmin
  • *
  • Posts: 768
  • Awards Generation Identitaire Drinkin' and Postin' For Dixie's land we'll take our stand! Goon or Ex-Goon TNE Veteran
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #48 on: October 09, 2012, 09:20:30 PM »
0
omg that's a real fucking ad.

OSI

  • Cishet White Male
  • Grand Inquisitors
  • *
  • Posts: 2054
  • For Dixie's Land we'll make our stand
  • Awards TNE Veteran Classicist Arizona The Gentry cold, dead hands Prepper For Dixie's land we'll take our stand! Soldier Fascist Ave Maria
    • Awards
Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #49 on: October 09, 2012, 10:00:04 PM »
0
Well that's it for the American experiment. Let's roll up our sleeves and figure out what comes next.