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The Something Sensitive Forums => Goon Acres => Topic started by: cis scum 1.0 on November 12, 2013, 06:49:21 PM

Title: Cracked going the way of SA, SJW pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 12, 2013, 06:49:21 PM
I tend to check them out pretty regularly, often every morning while commuting or getting coffee. They usually have at least one article or two that are interesting, and some of them can be pretty funny sometimes. For the most part they also seemed immune to most of SJW funkill that has been going around on the internet in the last couple of years.

Well, that is, until a little while ago. First article I really noticed that went full SJW :madgoon: was this article '6 sexist video game problems even bigger than breasts' (http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-sexist-video-game-problems-even-bigger-than-breasts/) which was filled with feminist bullshit about video games (that the person writing obviously hadn't played, they apparently got so many basic things wrong). Cracked readers overwhelmingly rioted in the comments, the article wasn't signed and they just raged at how stupid, innacurate and full of SJW bullshit it was. I think it's their most commented on article, and even two months later people are still bitching about it in the comments.

Then there was an article about 'problematic' Halloween costumes (apparently wearing a chinaman outfit makes you a racist you should DIE) and another one about the bad MRAs and the darn friendzone and other shit like that has been slowly trickling in the last three months, at a faster and faster pace.

today they've hit overload with not one but three fucking articles that are just ridiculous unfunny uninformative SJW bullshit pieces. First, "7 things no one tells you about being homeless" (http://www.cracked.com/article_20720_7-things-no-one-tells-you-about-being-homeless.html), a 'Quick Fix' called "4 Bigots using 'Science' to further their dumbass theories" (http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/4-bigots-using-science-to-further-their-dumbass-theories/) and finally another regular article called "4 Friend Zone Cheat Codes (according to the internet)" (http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-friend-zone-cheat-codes-according-to-internet/)

The homeless article (epitomed by :christina:) might be the most pernicious one of all, because under the umbrella of 'educating' people, it's all SJW bullshit from a white guy who ended up in that position because of his own damn stupidity. The guy had a contract where he had to spend one week at his job, then he had a week off and went back to his apartment. Three months in, turns out that he gets evicted without a notice. Now, instead of:

1) Suing the shit out of his landlord for evicting them without a notice, which is illegal
2) Using his money to rent a room somewhere

he instead became homeless for months and started to do LSD and live in the woods. what the fuck. The main reason why people are homeless is because they don't have a source of income, which is how they could be able to afford a place and to eat and all of these things in the first place. Not only did he have a job, it was a job where he only needed an apartment two weeks out of four. Shit, if he wanted to he could have commuted four or five hours to get to his job and then back to his new place, who gives a shit? He has a full week off, it's not like he needs to drive there every day, just once every two weeks.

Nope, like a goony motherfucker he went to live in the woods and started doing LSD and then pontificates about how homeless people have it hard and how they don't know how it is like he does.

Stupid motherfucker mentions how one of the first few things he did was to buy a stove to cook himself a meal, and it cost him $150. $150 for a fucking mini-stove. That works with gas, that he had to pay for. I mean, how else could he eat warm food on such a budget? Buy microwavable shit and use a gas station microwave to heat it up? Buy food that he could eat without having to eat it up?

I mean even if you're in fucking between paychecks and don't have the money RIGHT NOW to rent a room somewhere (where you'll only be there half the time anyway) he couldn't just call his family and say 'Uh well I'm about to be homeless, can you Western Union me $300 so I can pay upfront for a room, I'm getting my paycheck in a couple of weeks and I'll pay you then"? Shit, motherfucker could have simply sucked it up, lived in his truck for a week, went back to work then get a place when he came back with more money. But nope, living in the woods and becoming a junkie was the only option.Who the fuck thinks "I am so bored, I need to do LSD"? Such a pathetic excuse. It's not like having an apartment in that town would suddenly means he'd be so busy he wouldn't do drugs. He'd still have 7 days in a row without anything concrete to do. I wish I could see a picture of what that guy looks like, because I bet he looks like a limp-wristed goony faggot.



Quick Fix articles, for those who don't know, are supposed to be short lists of funny or weird or gross things, basically a quick and interesting read. While the four examples chosen there are obviously stupid, it's just fucking outraged 'LOOK WHAT THOSE PEOPLE BELEIVE AND HOW THEY BELITTLE SCIENCE!!' Bet you'll never see 'Trannies' on the list of people who abuse science in the name of bigotry (my womanpenis, my womansperm, cotton ceiling, female brain, etc...)

And, well the other one about the Friend Zone is just about those redditMRAbronies guys and how dare they! I couldn't bring myself to read all of it either, just stopped after I read this in the opening of the article:

Quote
You'll note that I'm keeping this advice gender-neutral, because despite how creepily male-oriented the available literature is, love can go unrequited in both directions.

:razor: :dinorage: :razor:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 12, 2013, 06:52:21 PM
its not that I care so much about cracked or anything, it just seems that slowly but surely every single website I go to is becoming more and more pozzed up by SJWs, either internally or being forced by outside forces to self-censor in order to not suffer their wrath.

i mean I don't even watch Conan O'Brian but apparently now making a joke about a muslim woman superhero saying she has 'so many more powers than her husband's other wives' is worthy of boycott and flagellation on the public scene.

what the fuck is happening, how the fuck can it become impossible to make jokes about everything but white republican heteronormative american reddit MRA pua bronies anymore?

I half expect that to become the new bond villain at this point, what the fuck is going on and why is everything become so pozzed up so fast everywhere?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Strategically placed watermelon on November 12, 2013, 07:28:26 PM
Cracked's downward spiral started happening years ago when David Wong became head editor there. David Wong was previously the owner of a site called pointlesswasteoftime which I used to read, it was the same sort of dumb 2000s internet comedy that Something Awful was at the time. He also wrote a comedy horror novel called John Dies at the End which was well received and somewhat successful on the internet for a while- there was an indie film made based on it that was on Netflix for a while.

David Wong and John Cheese are friends and at some point they both became pozzed and you can tell they started feeding off each other. John Cheese is the one who used to be "poor" (actually just a goony nerd in a white trash marriage) and Wong apparently became feminist along the way as well.

I'll admit I found Cracked funny a long time ago but it's been completely devoid of humor for the past few years.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: rape priviledge on November 12, 2013, 07:34:43 PM
Never read cracked.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on November 12, 2013, 07:37:48 PM
I gave up on Cracked a few years ago when I realized it was all clickbait list humor.

HERE'S 6 FUNNY THINGS!
*click*
1. Funny thing
2. Funny thing
CLICK HERE FOR 3-4!


:lolno:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on November 12, 2013, 08:03:40 PM
i read the daily caller because the writers dont take themselves too seriously and they arent pozzed

they are also appropriately outraged when trannies are in the wrong bathroom
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on November 12, 2013, 08:12:28 PM
its not that I care so much about cracked or anything, it just seems that slowly but surely every single website I go to is becoming more and more pozzed up by SJWs, either internally or being forced by outside forces to self-censor in order to not suffer their wrath.

i mean I don't even watch Conan O'Brian but apparently now making a joke about a muslim woman superhero saying she has 'so many more powers than her husband's other wives' is worthy of boycott and flagellation on the public scene.

what the fuck is happening, how the fuck can it become impossible to make jokes about everything but white republican heteronormative american reddit MRA pua bronies anymore?

I half expect that to become the new bond villain at this point, what the fuck is going on and why is everything become so pozzed up so fast everywhere?

I go to Cracked maybe twice a week and I've noticed it getting worse too. There are people complaining in the comments here and there, but there are also people trying to shout them down and I think we all know how this is going to end.

And speaking of "white republican heteronormative american etc.", my girlfriend watches that show The Blacklist on NBC - it's fucking terrible, like pretty much everything else NBC has done for years - and I've slowly picked up on the trend that seemingly every week the evil criminal is a white guy. Somebody is poisoning entire subway cars full of people? White guy. Somebody is kidnapping and killing witnesses before federal trials? White guy. Somebody is setting off bombs on airplanes? White guy.

I'm tired of all these white, American terrorists setting off bombs on planes and in the subways and smuggling dirty bombs into the country. It happens all the time. :lolno:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on November 12, 2013, 08:36:13 PM
Maybe we should start a cracked forum here at SS?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on November 12, 2013, 09:13:48 PM

I've slowly picked up on the trend that seemingly every week the evil criminal is a white guy. Somebody is poisoning entire subway cars full of people? White guy. Somebody is kidnapping and killing witnesses before federal trials? White guy. Somebody is setting off bombs on airplanes? White guy.


To be fair, all of those are crimes that require a lot of premeditation, planning and effort. When the shoe fits...
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Justice Dredd on November 12, 2013, 09:24:42 PM
these things happen. remember all the hooplah in the 90s about the terrible influences of the Simpsons and Married with Children having on the public? it's a phase that society goes through.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: MY FURSONOUNS on November 12, 2013, 09:47:07 PM
huh wonder if they squeezed out seanbaby since he refuses to be pc
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Fade to Vanilla on November 12, 2013, 09:58:34 PM
I gave up on Cracked a few years ago when I realized it was all clickbait list humor.

HERE'S 6 FUNNY THINGS!
*click*
1. Funny thing
2. Funny thing
CLICK HERE FOR 3-4!


:lolno:

there's this


Cracked's downward spiral started happening years ago when David Wong became head editor there. David Wong was previously the owner of a site called pointlesswasteoftime which I used to read, it was the same sort of dumb 2000s internet comedy that Something Awful was at the time. He also wrote a comedy horror novel called John Dies at the End which was well received and somewhat successful on the internet for a while- there was an indie film made based on it that was on Netflix for a while.

David Wong and John Cheese are friends and at some point they both became pozzed and you can tell they started feeding off each other. John Cheese is the one who used to be "poor" (actually just a goony nerd in a white trash marriage) and Wong apparently became feminist along the way as well.

I'll admit I found Cracked funny a long time ago but it's been completely devoid of humor for the past few years.

and this is kinda close, but i think you're blaming wong too much.

wong's books are enjoyable and fun (although the 2nd one got a bit rough at the end, without John dying and all that).  what i think is that wong is paying far more attention to that side of the biz and much less to the website.  can't blame him tbh.

that means that he either outsources most of his responsibilities by hiring new writers or cheese is doing more of the heavy lifting.  probably a bit of both. but after enough time, there are only so many ideas you can have for list-icles.  and add to that knowing that the internet is full of morons that couldn't make a fart joke in a bean factory, but that won't stop them from submitting shitty ideas to cracked about "top six reasons you should take a tranny on a date". 

in a lot of ways, it's like the simpsons.  the original writers were great, and there was several seasons worth of material for them to explore.  but after the top talent moves on, and the format doesn't reinvent itself, you're left with 2nd or 3rd rate fill-ins and re-runs. at this point, they need to hibernate for a while, let the PC crap build up and then reinvent themselves as a counter-PC site and shiv all that SJW crap in the shower to let it bleed out.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: freak puke on November 13, 2013, 01:30:58 AM
and this is kinda close, but i think you're blaming wong too much.

wong's books are enjoyable and fun (although the 2nd one got a bit rough at the end, without John dying and all that).  what i think is that wong is paying far more attention to that side of the biz and much less to the website.  can't blame him tbh.

I don't know if you were referring to something in This Book is Full of Spiders, but John Dies at the End was the first book, not the second.  The second book sucked, though.  It was like Wong decided that people liking the articles he wrote about SERIOUS ISSUES way back when (which were pretty good imo) meant that he should try to incorporate SERIOUS ISSUES into his new book.  Nothing terribly SJW or political, just hamfisted and stupid shit about John's alcoholism and the nature of evil or whatever.

And yeah, I haven't read Cracked since maybe the day after that shitty video games article, I think it was actually an article by Dan O'Brien that killed it for me, it basically boiled down to "Hey guys, stop trying so hard to have sex!"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: MY FURSONOUNS on November 13, 2013, 01:33:47 AM
i still remember the monkeysphere article from pwot that got me interested in psychology for about six minutes

which one wrote that
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on November 13, 2013, 01:41:00 AM
Cracked's downward spiral started happening years ago when David Wong became head editor there. David Wong was previously the owner of a site called pointlesswasteoftime which I used to read, it was the same sort of dumb 2000s internet comedy that Something Awful was at the time. He also wrote a comedy horror novel called John Dies at the End which was well received and somewhat successful on the internet for a while- there was an indie film made based on it that was on Netflix for a while.

David Wong and John Cheese are friends and at some point they both became pozzed and you can tell they started feeding off each other. John Cheese is the one who used to be "poor" (actually just a goony nerd in a white trash marriage) and Wong apparently became feminist along the way as well.

I'll admit I found Cracked funny a long time ago but it's been completely devoid of humor for the past few years.

I don't think pointlesswasteoftime was like old SA at all. dude seemed far less childish and actually wrote about insightful stuff (albeit comedically) instead of poison wombs making heaven too fucking crowded. he directed some pretty legit realtalk at internet spergs like 'spending all day on the internet filtering out all negativity and annoyance will turn you into a manchild with no ability to handle the real world' along with taking a very reasonable middle ground during the mid-2000s video game violence shitstorm.

he actually seems pretty intelligent and level-headed most of the time, even today, with one of his articles actually having a view of the world that would seem like 'bootstraps bullshit' to SA.
he also pretty much admitted that he votes republican all the time !!!AND!!! he called out DocEvil on Twitter for his retarded "SAVE TRAYVON FUCK THE WHITE MAN" bullshit and made him and his goon fans respond in a really butthurt mean-spirted way.

...........so it's fucking silly that he wrote this stupid fucking article http://www.cracked.com/article_19785_5-ways-modern-men-are-trained-to-hate-women.html because it's not only him projecting his own idiotic misogyny and sex-obsession over all men, but also going against his own earlier and later 'work hard and stop whining' comments; if women are THIS insanely oppressed, practically enslaved by men in the western world, that would contradict his worldviews hugely. he also retweets Anita Sarkeesian on Twitter for 'see I'm not a bigot despite being a rethuglikkkan!' points.

it's really lame because he actually seems like a decent guy who's embracing this stuff purely to fit in with Cracked's moronic community.
Quote
i still remember the monkeysphere article from pwot that got me interested in psychology for about six minutes

which one wrote that

yeah, that was a good one. Wong wrote it. see?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SSOUL TRANN on November 13, 2013, 01:42:59 AM
Last time I laughed at Cracked was when the local Skaggs Albersons was out of Mad Magazine.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Fade to Vanilla on November 13, 2013, 01:48:17 AM
and this is kinda close, but i think you're blaming wong too much.

wong's books are enjoyable and fun (although the 2nd one got a bit rough at the end, without John dying and all that).  what i think is that wong is paying far more attention to that side of the biz and much less to the website.  can't blame him tbh.

I don't know if you were referring to something in This Book is Full of Spiders, but John Dies at the End was the first book, not the second.  The second book sucked, though.  It was like Wong decided that people liking the articles he wrote about SERIOUS ISSUES way back when (which were pretty good imo) meant that he should try to incorporate SERIOUS ISSUES into his new book.  Nothing terribly SJW or political, just hamfisted and stupid shit about John's alcoholism and the nature of evil or whatever.

And yeah, I haven't read Cracked since maybe the day after that shitty video games article, I think it was actually an article by Dan O'Brien that killed it for me, it basically boiled down to "Hey guys, stop trying so hard to have sex!"

sorry, i worded that awkwardly making the connection back to JDATE.  yeah, JDATE was first, and spiders was the follow-up.  spiders just kinda fell apart, like it was trying to recapture the fever-dream, episodic nature of JDATE.  i even liked the JDATE movie, for what it was; it didn't aim too high and wasn't afraid to pick only certain of the stories to tell.  although i wish they included the bit about the sportscaster being possessed and ranting on live TV.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on November 13, 2013, 02:02:12 AM
Oh also: Cracked has been like this for eons. There was a 'sexist comic book heroine outfits' article with a 'top 10 bullshit defenses of sexist super heroine outfits' follow-up based on the comments section for the first article. Then he hypocritically admitted that he loves THIS comic http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empowered which is practically softcore porn by a guy who obviously jacks off to anime tits and the idiots on the forum justified it as "oh no, it's satire of our objectifying culture".

And this was like a year or more ago.

So I dunno where you've been all this time.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on November 13, 2013, 02:04:09 AM
I gave up on Cracked a few years ago when I realized it was all clickbait list humor.

HERE'S 6 FUNNY THINGS!
*click*
1. Funny thing
2. Funny thing
CLICK HERE FOR 3-4!


:lolno:

Bleecher Report pulls the same shit
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: VFW on November 13, 2013, 02:08:34 AM
Sean "Seanbaby" Reiley is probably the only reason I would read Cracked (his articles).

I wonder how ol' Sean would fare if his "friend" Miguel started fat chicks in party hats today?  :allears:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on November 13, 2013, 03:15:45 AM
The only Cracked writer I ever enjoyed was that Jacopo something guy who basically finds a ton of cool little stories from history, mostly on Wikipedia. Seanbaby is alright, Wong's pop-psych gives regular pop-psych a bad name.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: dicknihilator rapex on November 13, 2013, 07:42:51 AM
lol why are you taking Buchols stuff seriously. the friend zone article was satire or some shit
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 13, 2013, 10:34:14 AM
Pretty easy to figure out that making listicles about SJW issues make more money.  A lot of sites are employing this model, which is why we're seeing such pozzed news sites.  The unemployed tumblr masses is a pretty big internet demographic.

SJWs are unemployed and a demographic target that people are not going to want to target in the first place. If SJWs were such a great market and way to boost revenues, SA wouldn't be in the dire straits that it is.

You're conflating 'vocal minority' with 'customer base that creates ad clicks'. That's also why I don't get what's happening, the best way to alienate most of your user base and make leave is by upping up the SJW shit until they can't take it anymore. It's like sacrificing your son to an idol to get 25% less on your paycheck. Doesn't make any fucking sense.

And speaking of "white republican heteronormative american etc.", my girlfriend watches that show The Blacklist on NBC - it's fucking terrible, like pretty much everything else NBC has done for years - and I've slowly picked up on the trend that seemingly every week the evil criminal is a white guy. Somebody is poisoning entire subway cars full of people? White guy. Somebody is kidnapping and killing witnesses before federal trials? White guy. Somebody is setting off bombs on airplanes? White guy.

I'm tired of all these white, American terrorists setting off bombs on planes and in the subways and smuggling dirty bombs into the country. It happens all the time. :lolno:

Yeah the terrorists being white thing has been going on for way longer than that. When was the last time you had a major movie where the terrorists were Muslims (and was not based on a true story)? No way you could have a movie like 'True Lies' nowadays without having screams of Islamophobia and shit. I mean look at 24. There were, what, 8 or 9 seasons of that show? Was there a single time where the terrorists were muslims AND were not being directed/duped by evil rich white (conservative) men?

these things happen. remember all the hooplah in the 90s about the terrible influences of the Simpsons and Married with Children having on the public? it's a phase that society goes through.

I hope you're right because now I'm afraid that the few tv shows I watch (comedies from FX mostly) are going to go that way. The last thing I need is Archer falling in love with a post-op tranny because she's a real woman~ or some shit.

Oh also: Cracked has been like this for eons. There was a 'sexist comic book heroine outfits' article with a 'top 10 bullshit defenses of sexist super heroine outfits' follow-up based on the comments section for the first article. Then he hypocritically admitted that he loves THIS comic http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empowered which is practically softcore porn by a guy who obviously jacks off to anime tits and the idiots on the forum justified it as "oh no, it's satire of our objectifying culture".

And this was like a year or more ago.

So I dunno where you've been all this time.

I don't read articles about comic books, that's why some of those articles probably flew by me, mostly read the shit about history, movies and music. Don't really give a shit about video games or comics or other manchildren pursuits tbh
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on November 13, 2013, 11:36:49 AM
He fell in love with a post-robot-op commie, that's pretty close.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Strategically placed watermelon on November 13, 2013, 04:25:17 PM
I don't think pointlesswasteoftime was like old SA at all. dude seemed far less childish and actually wrote about insightful stuff (albeit comedically) instead of poison wombs making heaven too fucking crowded.

I might be misremembering then- the PWOT site has been down for years, he didn't even keep it open as an archive of all his old articles. The main thing I remember it for is the fake movie reviews.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Mullah Omar on November 13, 2013, 04:36:25 PM
Never read cracked.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on November 13, 2013, 11:24:17 PM
I don't think pointlesswasteoftime was like old SA at all. dude seemed far less childish and actually wrote about insightful stuff (albeit comedically) instead of poison wombs making heaven too fucking crowded.

I might be misremembering then- the PWOT site has been down for years, he didn't even keep it open as an archive of all his old articles. The main thing I remember it for is the fake movie reviews.
Oh I think he did SA-like stuff too, but he also wrote stuff that you'd absolutely never read on the SA front page.

Also Wong called out DocEvil's Trayvon tweet, made him and his goon followers mad as heck:

https://twitter.com/JohnDiesattheEn/status/356376149812719617

https://twitter.com/JohnDiesattheEn/status/356421900550942722

Quote
you’re bad at twitter and also life
Quote
this conversation was what I needed to unfollow David Wong. thank
Quote
yeah perhaps someday the rest of us can devolve into writing puffed-up listicles and objectively bad opinions

objectively bad opinions :allears:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on November 13, 2013, 11:41:52 PM
lmao, owned in less than 140 characters
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: bolonium on November 14, 2013, 06:50:39 AM
lmao, owned in less than 140 characters


Twitter is an amazing platform for drive-by trolling commies
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 14, 2013, 12:20:01 PM
yeah Cracked is definitely going the way of SA fuck damn it.
http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/americas-5-most-embarrassing-high-school-mascots/

:madgoon: A TEAM CALLED EAST ORINETALS?? AYRABSS?? HOW DARE THEY NOT CHANG ETHEIR NAMES AND MASCOTS TO THE 'GENDERFLUID FRIENDS OF NATURE'???

again what the fuck is it with all those "controversies" about these sports team names? They've had them for decades and suddenly at the tail end of 2013 people just realized it?

:sjw:

fuck it, one more and I'm done
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on November 14, 2013, 04:55:21 PM
Cracked has become a bugfuck crazy mess of SJW masquerading as humor and yet it's still a hundred times better than SA.  It's happened in the last year or so, too.  It used to be "Holy shit you won't fuckin' believe these five WW2 facts" and "insane creepy shit Japanese game programmers hid in kids games" galore, but now it's three articles about why everything you think about <#THING> is wrong, one incredibly unfunny photoshop, and a video skit that is so bad it robs me of my will to live.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on November 14, 2013, 05:08:35 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-awesome-things-with-inexplicably-bad-reputations_p2/

Quote
You could be forgiven for believing that the fedora just materialized on a dude's head one day, perhaps after he successfully inserted 12 separate "get me a sandwich" jokes into a single piece of My Little Pony erotic fan fiction. But the hat's real origin was entirely unrelated to Applejack and Gilda discovering their repressed love: It got its name from the 19th century play Fedora, in which actress Sarah Bernhardt wore a stylish, narrow-brimmed women's hat while playing the lead, Princess Fedora. Female fans of Bernhardt picked up the style, which soon became an early symbol of women's liberation. Only later did fedoras become associated with menswear. In other words, like those Satanists who unknowingly wear an ancient Christian symbol around their necks, MRAs have picked the wrong symbol for their movement and should try adopting something new.

heh
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Trump is the New Norma on November 14, 2013, 06:34:13 PM
PC SJW shit is good at infiltrating the internet, because all SJWs are unemployed and have 12+ hours a day to comment/influence websites.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on November 15, 2013, 09:04:15 AM
I'm afraid they're around the bend as long as they keep letting this shit create content:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-responses-to-sexism-that-just-make-everything-worse/
 :say:
 :christina:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on November 15, 2013, 09:13:01 AM
I'm afraid they're around the bend as long as they keep letting this shit create content:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-responses-to-sexism-that-just-make-everything-worse/
 :say:
 :christina:

Oh dog, I recognize that style. That guy makes one of the most pozzed and Gen-crY webcomic I've ever had the displeasure of seeing posted anywhere.

here, look at this shit jesus christ (http://www.viruscomix.com/page577.html)


e: from that article:

Quote
Why aren't there more female investment bankers? Maybe it's actually the same reason there aren't more male investment bankers who aren't insufferable alpha males

number of investment bankers this guy actually knows: the one number you can't write in Roman numerals
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on November 15, 2013, 09:14:46 AM
It's getting close to the time where I delete Cracked from my bookmarks tab.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on November 15, 2013, 09:31:51 AM
Quote
here, look at this shit jesus christ
 (http://www.viruscomix.com/page577.html)

(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QBwUuiehwBQ/T4IExllkxQI/AAAAAAAAA5Y/Rrxy4fkHypc/s1600/george-bush-gif.gif)

 :facepalm:



Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 15, 2013, 12:09:58 PM
I'm afraid they're around the bend as long as they keep letting this shit create content:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-responses-to-sexism-that-just-make-everything-worse/
 :say:
 :christina:

:dinorage:

fuck it, i'm done

Seriously, WHY would you put that on a comedy website? It's not funny, it's not interesting, it's not weird, it's not creepy, it's just a fucking beta faggot pontificating on sexism and saying

ITS YOUR FAULT EVEN IF YOUR NOT A SEXIST :madgoon: and ranting about fedora MRA bronies

:razor:

Fuck that shit, fuck it so hard. I tried to even give that article a fair shake, ended up skimming most of it and I want to beat the shit out of whoever wrote that.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on November 15, 2013, 04:59:27 PM
They also gave us this today: http://www.cracked.com/article_20719_5-hilariously-perverse-trends-you-missed-in-famous-artwork.html

And by "famous artwork" they mean medieval Christian artwork, and by medieval Christian artwork they mean "lol look at this weird religious stuff they painted baby Jesus' weiner rofl." Oh but they threw in a single entry about the Buddha so it's not at all about Christians, everybody.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: hair sniffing boner diary on November 15, 2013, 06:25:33 PM
They also gave us this today: http://www.cracked.com/article_20719_5-hilariously-perverse-trends-you-missed-in-famous-artwork.html

And by "famous artwork" they mean medieval Christian artwork, and by medieval Christian artwork they mean "lol look at this weird religious stuff they painted baby Jesus' weiner rofl." Oh but they threw in a single entry about the Buddha so it's not at all about Christians, everybody.

First bit, how dare they symbolise the spiritual nourishment from our lady. Wouldn't this same group of sjw jack wagons cry BODY POLICING if this were a Facebook photo of a welfare whale breastfeeding?

Content: is this self awareness?

http://www.cracked.com/article_20562_6-spectacularly-failed-attempts-to-be-politically-correct.html

Nope! One of their examples is the titular Princess from the Disney film Princess and the Frog. Nothing shows how much you care about real, racial issues like sperging over children's entertainment!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on November 15, 2013, 10:41:03 PM
They also gave us this today: http://www.cracked.com/article_20719_5-hilariously-perverse-trends-you-missed-in-famous-artwork.html

And by "famous artwork" they mean medieval Christian artwork, and by medieval Christian artwork they mean "lol look at this weird religious stuff they painted baby Jesus' weiner rofl." Oh but they threw in a single entry about the Buddha so it's not at all about Christians, everybody.

First bit, how dare they symbolise the spiritual nourishment from our lady. Wouldn't this same group of sjw jack wagons cry BODY POLICING if this were a Facebook photo of a welfare whale breastfeeding?

Content: is this self awareness?

http://www.cracked.com/article_20562_6-spectacularly-failed-attempts-to-be-politically-correct.html

Nope! One of their examples is the titular Princess from the Disney film Princess and the Frog. Nothing shows how much you care about real, racial issues like sperging over children's entertainment!


you didn't even read the article, the accidental racism came from putting the only black disney princess on the watermelon flavored candy which is pff imo
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OSI on November 15, 2013, 10:49:16 PM
Quote
here, look at this shit jesus christ
 (http://www.viruscomix.com/page577.html)

(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QBwUuiehwBQ/T4IExllkxQI/AAAAAAAAA5Y/Rrxy4fkHypc/s1600/george-bush-gif.gif)

 :facepalm:


holy fucking shit I've never seen an 88888888888888888888888888888888888888 comic before
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: MY FURSONOUNS on November 16, 2013, 12:13:17 AM
(http://i.imgur.com/P9ge2ZN.jpg)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on November 16, 2013, 04:37:25 AM
We could have this as an :8888888888: smiley. I think it's pretty much physically impossible to follow let alone understand the bullshit this guy spews:

(http://i.imgur.com/8bpOejEm.png)

(but if you're actually curious, I think the gist of it is "waaaaah being young and middle class in canada is so hard waaaaaaaaaah")
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on November 16, 2013, 04:59:19 AM
(http://i.imgur.com/rV5Dsiv.jpg)

sick pubeburns brah
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on November 16, 2013, 10:07:48 AM
canada

Welp, that explains pretty much the entirety of viruscomix.com then

e: yes we need that panel as the 888 emot.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 16, 2013, 05:38:29 PM
SJW faggotry is everywhere. From the AV Club's review of the last south park episode

Quote
"And everything to do with the head of Sony was problematic. Sure, there are plenty of examples of how South Park had mocked foreign cultures in un-PC ways. But that doesn’t mean that it often works as either comedy or commentary. It’s sometimes silly, usually offensive, and rarely productive. Having the CEO engage in Game Of Thrones-esque sex was fine. But having the mangled pronunciation of the “Black Friday Bundle” repeated over and over again was unfortunate."

:madgoon: HOW CAN SOUTH PARK MAKE FUN OF GLORIOUS NIPPON??
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on November 16, 2013, 06:14:08 PM
SJW faggotry is everywhere. From the AV Club's review of the last south park episode

Quote
"And everything to do with the head of Sony was problematic. Sure, there are plenty of examples of how South Park had mocked foreign cultures in un-PC ways. But that doesn’t mean that it often works as either comedy or commentary. It’s sometimes silly, usually offensive, and rarely productive. Having the CEO engage in Game Of Thrones-esque sex was fine. But having the mangled pronunciation of the “Black Friday Bundle” repeated over and over again was unfortunate."

:madgoon: HOW CAN SOUTH PARK MAKE FUN OF GLORIOUS NIPPON??

"Rarely productive?" "Problematic?" "Unfortunate?" Did this faggot miss the entire Chinpokomon episode from years ago with the tiny penis and Pearl Harbor jokes? Who the fuck still watches South Park anyway?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: hair sniffing boner diary on November 16, 2013, 11:09:19 PM
you didn't even read the article, the accidental racism came from putting the only black disney princess on the watermelon flavored candy which is pff imo

I did read it.   I was referring to the logical jump of "Maddy = Mammy" only being possible if you were looking to be offended, which they are constantly doing. But you're right I should have specified because the watermelon thing is much funnier and therefore more memorable
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Coyote Attic on November 17, 2013, 10:35:45 AM

I've seen them go back and talk about old movies and TV shows to bitch about social justice issues.


On SA, they started to infiltrate the Comic Strip Megathread. Think about that. A thread that started as making fun of a slowly-dying medium and people just *had* to start posting old James Bond comic strips from British papers so they could bitch about misogyny. You could almost hear the scraping of the soapboxes.

I'm particularly bitter about it because it was my "go-to" thread for several years. There were lots of fun edits but then it just became a place to dump as many comics as you could find so others could find social issues to bitch about.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on November 17, 2013, 12:10:41 PM

I've seen them go back and talk about old movies and TV shows to bitch about social justice issues.


On SA, they started to infiltrate the Comic Strip Megathread. Think about that. A thread that started as making fun of a slowly-dying medium and people just *had* to start posting old James Bond comic strips from British papers so they could bitch about misogyny. You could almost hear the scraping of the soapboxes.

I'm particularly bitter about it because it was my "go-to" thread for several years. There were lots of fun edits but then it just became a place to dump as many comics as you could find so others could find social issues to bitch about.

Yep. This is from the other day.

Quote from: The Sezza" post="421892178
From what I remember, "shala shala" is a made-up phrase for what English 'sounds like' to Korean speakers. It's kind of like an English speaker saying a Chinese language sounds like "ching chong", only less horrendously cringe-worthy.

Because if a Korean mocks English speakers it's not racist at all, but if an English speaking person mocks Chinese speakers it's horribly racist. :judy:

I very nearly called him out in the thread but I'm trying to fly under the radar on SA with my views and it wasn't worth derailing the thread and making it worse.

Also of note: almost every time a black person is drawn in a comic it's "blackface."
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on November 17, 2013, 12:56:40 PM
For the most part, businesses generally cow to these people, which only emboldens them.  I think Chick Fil A was the only people who stood their ground, everyone else seems to wilt.  SJW shit only works if people are receptive to their attacks.  A lot of these companies need to sack up and not give a shit what these unemployed, unwashed masses think.

I don't want to get too far off the point of noting what an SJW crybox Cracked is becoming, but I would like to happily point out that the one self-appointed warrior lost his job for protesting at chick-fil-a

http://www.examiner.com/article/man-s-drive-thru-visit-to-bully-chick-fil-a-backfires-loses-cfo-job
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: nerdball on November 20, 2013, 02:30:23 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-responses-to-sexism-that-just-make-everything-worse/

So much  :madgoon: :christina: :depressedlesbian:, so little time.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on November 20, 2013, 03:06:06 PM
For the most part, businesses generally cow to these people, which only emboldens them.  I think Chick Fil A was the only people who stood their ground, everyone else seems to wilt.  SJW shit only works if people are receptive to their attacks.  A lot of these companies need to sack up and not give a shit what these unemployed, unwashed masses think.

I don't want to get too far off the point of noting what an SJW crybox Cracked is becoming, but I would like to happily point out that the one self-appointed warrior lost his job for protesting at chick-fil-a

http://www.examiner.com/article/man-s-drive-thru-visit-to-bully-chick-fil-a-backfires-loses-cfo-job

Quality news site brah

http://www.examiner.com/article/ufo-nasa-reveals-biblical-like-spacecraft?cid=taboola_inbound
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on November 20, 2013, 03:18:18 PM
For the most part, businesses generally cow to these people, which only emboldens them.  I think Chick Fil A was the only people who stood their ground, everyone else seems to wilt.  SJW shit only works if people are receptive to their attacks.  A lot of these companies need to sack up and not give a shit what these unemployed, unwashed masses think.

I don't want to get too far off the point of noting what an SJW crybox Cracked is becoming, but I would like to happily point out that the one self-appointed warrior lost his job for protesting at chick-fil-a

http://www.examiner.com/article/man-s-drive-thru-visit-to-bully-chick-fil-a-backfires-loses-cfo-job

Quality news site brah

http://www.examiner.com/article/ufo-nasa-reveals-biblical-like-spacecraft?cid=taboola_inbound

Anybody can sign up to write for the Examiner. It's one small step above a blog platform.

So yeah don't treat it as a reliable source any more than you would joeblow.wordpress.com, but it's not an UFO/Christian loonies website either.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on November 20, 2013, 05:26:59 PM
its not that I care so much about cracked or anything, it just seems that slowly but surely every single website I go to is becoming more and more pozzed up by SJWs, either internally or being forced by outside forces to self-censor in order to not suffer their wrath.

I know this is old but this stuff makes me legit worried that I could be on the wrong side of this whole thing.   :bernanke:

PC did this in the early nineties, which is what led to the backlash that created SA, Ebaums, the chans and so on. It's cyclical.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 20, 2013, 07:29:05 PM
its not that I care so much about cracked or anything, it just seems that slowly but surely every single website I go to is becoming more and more pozzed up by SJWs, either internally or being forced by outside forces to self-censor in order to not suffer their wrath.

I know this is old but this stuff makes me legit worried that I could be on the wrong side of this whole thing.   :bernanke:

:lolno:

Rrail's slippery slope to pozzdom:

Began as a staunch conservative, but started to listen more and more to liberals until he became one himself, and is now wondering if he should go SJW because he 'doesn't want to be on the wrong side of things'. Move out of Seattle before it's too late. At this rate you'll have lopped your cock off in less than two years.


PS that's also why it's great to have faith and ideals: you don't end up taking in the whims of society because it's the "right thing to do". Your attitude is why we ended up with prohibition and forced eugenics in the 1920s.

How many people do you think just jumped on the forced eugenics train because "We're now in an era of science!" and they feared being on the wrong side of history for believing that no, you shouldn't forcibly sterilize retards and other undesirables?

The whims of the populace is the worst fucking reason to ever adopt an idea/philosophy.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 20, 2013, 07:30:55 PM
Actually to go further and show you how SJWs just suck the fun out of comedy, just look at this review from the AV club on a recent episode of Brooklyn 9-9. This is how the reviewer opened his critique.

Quote
Looking at the title of this episode and considering where Brooklyn Nine-Nine is set, I figured “Sal’s Pizza” would be a nod to Do the Right Thing.

... I’m not asking for a frank discussion of race relations in Brooklyn or a parody of Do the Right Thing (that wouldn’t have played well); it’s just strange to include iconography so heavily associated with the setting involved and not give a nod to it at all. It’s not a knock on the episode, but it pervaded my thoughts throughout.
I'm not asking you to bring up a serious race discussion in a comedy BUT WHY DIDN'T YOU? :madgoon:

And that's how he ends it:
Quote
I wasn’t happy about the prospect of comedy derived from women’s cattiness, but Diaz’s short moment of sentimentality, that women in male-dominated fields need to stick together, worked without feeling heavy-handed or cheesy. Unlike Santiago, it didn’t overstep its moment.

Nevermind that the whole episode was built around the competitive and destructive behavior of men toward each others in the name of rivalry, the fact that the show spent 2 minutes of women showing the same type of behavior is "problematic" because Heaven forbid we ever depict two women acting like women actually do in real life.


Are those the people you want to side with, Rrail? People who are so obsessed with social justice that even when watching a silly comedy, the first thing you do his bring up race, and end by bringing up feminism.

We've been calling them Social Justice Warriors, but it might be time for a more fitting name: The New Puritans.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: nerdball on November 21, 2013, 08:33:16 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/3l76vz9.jpg)

rrail.jpg
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Failure to communicate on November 23, 2013, 02:37:16 PM
So some guy on Reddit made this chart.

Quote
I was curious and figured I'd look at the Cracked.com Alexis rankings (basically the viewership) during and immediately after three of their more radical articles. The reception is akin to a battery acid enema.

(http://imgur.com/EWn8hEA.jpg)

Not a big surprise.  If someone wanted to read preachy, whiny SJ bullshit, they'd go to Jezebel, not Cracked.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Kill all goons on November 23, 2013, 02:49:17 PM
I can't stand reading John Cheese (what kind of nickname is that anyway?) articles. I can't figure out why because as a whole his articles try to be uplifting or whatever but it's just the way he writes that makes me want to punch his lights out. I mean has he ever written an article that WASN'T him bitching about what a fuck up he was in his early life?

So your father was an alcoholic whoop-de-fucking-do but you really don't need to write a 1000 articles about the same shit till the end of time.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on November 23, 2013, 05:21:23 PM
I can't stand reading John Cheese (what kind of nickname is that anyway?) articles. I can't figure out why because as a whole his articles try to be uplifting or whatever but it's just the way he writes that makes me want to punch his lights out. I mean has he ever written an article that WASN'T him bitching about what a fuck up he was in his early life?

So your father was an alcoholic whoop-de-fucking-do but you really don't need to write a 1000 articles about the same shit till the end of time.

john cheese is the closest most of gen-cry will get to the htfu lifestyle without changing the channel out of disgust
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Kill all goons on November 23, 2013, 05:54:09 PM
Also if it were me I'd prohibit every writer on cracked to write about batman ever again the comic books, the movies whatever. No more.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on November 23, 2013, 05:56:34 PM
I can't stand how often they call a list of things "insane". Get a fucking thesaurus ya list makin' nerds.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 23, 2013, 07:24:44 PM
yeah I'm glad to see the general cracked readership reacted the same way I did (fuck that shit, gonna go read something else then)

Maybe it'll teach them to stop posting faggot articles again. I bet they had a huuuuge drop after that " :madgoon: sexist problems in videogames" article. Their most commented upon article, and basically 90% are shitting on cracked for it.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: rape priviledge on November 23, 2013, 10:56:11 PM
I can't stand how often they call a list of things "insane". Get a fucking thesaurus ya list makin' nerds.

Yeah, their use of "insane" is problematic, bordering on toxic.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on November 23, 2013, 11:53:21 PM
I don't wanna read preachy shit from any side. Feminism, Anti-Feminism, Religion vs Atheism, Conservative vs. Liberal, etc.

I don't wanna read your totally wacky list of top ten reasons of why people who don't buy into your biased bullshit are stupid. I wanna read about historical badasses, or things I never knew about my favourite authors. At least create a separate article collection for people who are so insufferable about their personal beliefs that they cannot separate from them for even a moment to read a throwaway article about "ten presidents you didn't know had heroin addictions". No one wants to read anyone else's preachy bullshit as an excuse for comedy.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Trumpriarch on November 24, 2013, 03:12:35 AM
But how are all the white male cis bigots supposed to know they're awful horrible people if we don't remind them everywhere constantly?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Failure to communicate on November 24, 2013, 07:39:52 AM
I've got "CIS SCUM" tattoed onto the insides of my eyelids.  It's really helped me to appreicate the plight of oppressed trannies playing a videogame with a male protagonist.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Fade to Vanilla on November 24, 2013, 08:28:10 AM
I can't stand how often they call a list of things "insane". Get a fucking thesaurus ya list makin' nerds.

Yeah, their use of "insane" is problematic, bordering on toxic.
fark-like puns detected
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on November 24, 2013, 09:42:19 AM
So some guy on Reddit made this chart.

Quote
I was curious and figured I'd look at the Cracked.com Alexis rankings (basically the viewership) during and immediately after three of their more radical articles. The reception is akin to a battery acid enema.

(http://imgur.com/EWn8hEA.jpg)

Not a big surprise.  If someone wanted to read preachy, whiny SJ bullshit, they'd go to Jezebel, not Cracked.
The 'ways we are trained to hate women' article didn't even seem 'radical' as much as 'David Wong trying really hard to pull some progressive nonsense out of his ass so people won't think he's too much of a rethuglikkkan bigot'. The entire article was ridiculously out-of-character given his stated worldviews in other articles (for one it was full of cartoonish stereotyping and over-simplification of complex issues, things he always complains about in every other piece of writing he's posted).

It bit him in the ass because the article also had a weird air of "it's not my fault I have issues with women that make me do these dumb sexist things, it's the fault of my male biology and society".

His ego is probably too large for him to admit the article was dumb, but I doubt he'll do it again.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on November 24, 2013, 05:04:51 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F8FUjHn88SM
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Failure to communicate on November 25, 2013, 08:50:15 AM
He's seen some shit.

I just discovered Cracked has a tumblr (oh god) and they've quoted Winston Rowntree, the unbearable wall of text faggot who made one of the more retarded sexism articles on there.

http://cracked.tumblr.com/post/67978888110/sexism-is-everyones-problem-but-many-continue-to

The article in question is so awful it's beyond words.  Sadly, the top rated comments seem to mostly be in support of this shit, so the pozzed level is growing.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-responses-to-sexism-that-just-make-everything-worse/

Some guy ranting about how shit it is : http://www.caltrops.com/pointy.php?action=viewPost&pid=160213
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on November 25, 2013, 10:39:56 PM
Well, Cracked having a Tumblr is pretty damning.

Plus I wouldn't say "women are outraged."  These losers seem to think that Tumblr feminists are an accurate cross section of women in general.

$10 on Winston having some skeletons in his closet.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on November 25, 2013, 11:22:54 PM
Well, Cracked having a Tumblr is pretty damning.

Plus I wouldn't say "women are outraged."  These losers seem to think that Tumblr feminists are an accurate cross section of women in general.

$10 on Winston having some skeletons in his closet.

probably not, more likely he grew up poor and fatherless and surrounded by his mom's friends and sisters
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 26, 2013, 11:47:25 AM


decided to check today, and still full of sjw bullshit. FAn article called "5 everyday annouances that are actually worldwide disasters" which can be summed up as ' AMERICANS RUIN THE WORLD :madgoon: '

Traffic jams = global warming, too many ads on tv = turns you into a robot for The Man, bad weather forecasts = we need more socialized style government where we put more tax money on that shit, brief power outages = same shit, spam emails = pollutions and scams and shit

Yeah, a website supposed to be about humor and weird shit just went on a Ralph Nader rant from 1995.

It's not even as bad as "5 Unfortunate Biases Hard Coded into your DNA", which should have been called "5 reasons why white cis males should die"

5. You think Dark-skinned people are bad!
4. You don't respect fat people!
3. Women are only boobs and asses and vaginas to you!
2. You don't really care about the poor!
1. You're happy with your privilege and think you're better than everyone!

The comments also love the article, and include gems like

- A german guy who took a University test and realized because of it that he's actually prejudiced against Black people even though he barely ever met any in his life, and he doesn't feel hatred or has racist thoughts on a subconsious level
- Doctors are jerks to the obese!
- "If only black Africans had colonized America instead of white Europeans" (lmao)
- hegel posts there: "Nothing quite like a person telling you how modern feminism is pointless and sexist, while addressing this to your tits. Yes this has happened to me."



the list goes on and on. burn cracked to the ground
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 26, 2013, 11:52:04 AM
Quote
Turn on the TV right now and watch any comedy show. It doesn't have to actually be funny; it just has to be attempting to make jokes. Odds are you'll see one or two mildly racist jokes, maybe a couple of religious jokes, and a freaking avalanche of fat jokes. Making fun of fatties is the "last acceptable prejudice," because deep down we all associate being fat with being a terrible person. Why else would you try to drown yourself in Cheetos if not to consciously rid the world of your own horribleness?

The prejudice is so ingrained, we don't even know we have it, and it is getting worse -- weight discrimination has increased 66 percent in the past two decades. It starts early, too. A study in the U.K. found that kids as young as 4 assume that fat children have fewer friends, are less likely to be invited to parties, and are dumber than slim children, based on absolutely no knowledge of the children in question beyond their physical appearance. These same biases follow them into adulthood -- a separate study found that doctors who specifically treat obesity tend to think that fat people are lazy and stupid, findings that were presumably reinforced by the doctors' inclination to prescribe roller skates and book learnin' to their overweight patients.

Even more troubling, it turns out that male jurors, specifically thin male jurors, are more likely to convict an overweight person, especially if the accused is a woman (this is called "the Hamburglar effect," by us, just now). So just by being overweight, your chances of going to jail increase. People are also more likely to judge their bosses harshly and consider them less effective if they are overweight, even if their size doesn't affect their job in any way, and obese people (particularly obese women) actually earn less money than their colleagues. Considering that half the population is going to be staggeringly overweight within a few decades, we assume this prejudice is going to develop into fat people shunning slightly fatter people based on the size of their Rascal scooters rather than their actual waistlines.

 :lf:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Trumpriarch on November 26, 2013, 12:37:45 PM
Good. The more disadvantages that fat people face the better. Being fat needs to be made as unappealing as possible.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on November 26, 2013, 12:50:19 PM
Fat is where it's at.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on November 26, 2013, 12:55:18 PM
will someone knock winston "888" rowntree off his soapbox already.

e: oh holy lol. these people are fucking broken

(http://i.imgur.com/rrOiWYM.jpg)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 26, 2013, 01:25:03 PM
I keep trying to read the 5 biases in your DNA but it's so hard. I mean the list open with this:

Quote
I've told you before that we're all more racist than we think
:christina: x 1000

Quote
Unless you have avoided every single form of media for your entire life, you are probably aware that women are viewed as sexual objects in a way that men just aren't. However, we are so conditioned to this behavior that both men and women are equally guilty of looking at a female body as no more than a collection of round, bouncy parts.

All the women on tv shows, movies and video games are model quality while the men are just your average joe looking perfectly normal, and not models with perfectly sculpted abs, and there is absolutely no objectification of men in media directed toward women the same way there is of women when directed toward men. Just take the twilight movies, it's all about women tits and ass, not glistening vampire abs and shit.

Quote
n general, you are more likely to recognize objects through their individual pieces, but our brains seemed evolutionarily primed to see other humans as single entities, rather than a set of arms and legs. Except for women, whom we literally view as objects.

hegel.txt

Quote
When you pass homeless people on the street, there is a good chance you look away, or check your watch, or play dead to avoid having to speak to them. Sometimes you might give that person money, but you would be hard-pressed to recall anything about their appearance once you walked away. That's because science has proven that you care about that homeless person even less than you could've ever imagined.

Yeah it's not because the brain is wired in such a way that useless information, including the faces of people we think we will never see again, is immediately discarded. We never instantly forget who the cashier at a gas station or convenience store is if don't see them on a daily basis, it's just that our brains hate homeless people.

Quote
On paper, it seems ridiculous that people would devote so much time and money to a bunch of strangers playing a game they have absolutely nothing invested in and no possible way of affecting the outcome. Yet people will tattoo their bodies, end friendships, destroy relationships, and even start freaking riots just to prove their team (or "group") is better than everyone else's. The groups don't even stay the same -- team rosters change, sometimes on a yearly basis. People aren't devoted to the people in the group, but to the idea of the group itself, and they will attack you (verbally or physically) for even daring to wear the shirt of a different group in their presence.

bleep bloop bleep bloop what is this "sports" thing what you are talking makes no logical sense bleep bloop sports fans are violent alpha males bleep bloop engage evade subroutine

:aspero:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Failure to communicate on November 26, 2013, 02:40:36 PM
Holy fuck this "Racist DNA" shit.  It's like this is pushing for mandatory diversity classes because you have to wash away the evil born sin of racism (of course, only whites need attend, everyone else's DNA is pure!)

Quote
I've told you before that we're all more racist than we think. Many cultures have a fashion bias against darker skin. For example, last year in India, people bought over 230 metric tons of skin-lightening cream. Back in 2008, the cosmetics company L'Oreal was accused of lightening Beyonce Knowles' complexion in a series of ads, as if her blackness would suddenly terrify the millions of fans she'd earned around the globe over the previous decade.

When this shit starts out with a comparison of the western world with India (which is so racist it makes the KKK look like a goddamn diversity rally) and one instance of a single advertising company which was probably fired right after, you know they're grasping for all the tiniest straws they can get their hands on.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on November 26, 2013, 06:16:26 PM
theres all this chatter about how we're all racist but they never actually explain why racism is bad
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on November 26, 2013, 07:16:48 PM
will someone knock winston "888" rowntree off his soapbox already.

e: oh holy lol. these people are fucking broken

(http://i.imgur.com/rrOiWYM.jpg)

How are they still getting away with insinuating people they don't like/agree with must be gay? Isn't that thoughtcrime?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Justice Dredd on November 26, 2013, 07:30:26 PM
Quote
Except for women, whom we literally view as objects.

 :facepalm:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on November 26, 2013, 07:32:10 PM
Who are these faggots at Cracked trying to impress?  This kind of house nigger type of white male guilt has to be really taxing on the psyche.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on November 26, 2013, 08:14:18 PM
Now more than ever we need the viruscomix emot.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on November 26, 2013, 08:17:58 PM
Today's "Five everyday occurrences that are actually disasters" was literally* written by a hyperventilating fat 14 year old girl.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on November 26, 2013, 08:22:46 PM
Quote
Except for women, whom we literally view as objects.

 :facepalm:

when the only woman in your life is a fleshlight you might think everyone views women the same way you do
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on November 26, 2013, 10:07:50 PM
will someone knock winston "888" rowntree off his soapbox already.

e: oh holy lol. these people are fucking broken

(http://i.imgur.com/rrOiWYM.jpg)
Lets make one of these for SA
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on November 27, 2013, 01:46:48 AM
will someone knock winston "888" rowntree off his soapbox already.

e: oh holy lol. these people are fucking broken

(http://i.imgur.com/rrOiWYM.jpg)
Lets make one of these for SA

It would all translate to "I hate myself." Maybe one or two "NO, FUCK YOU DAD"s.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Gas Chamber of Commerce on November 27, 2013, 05:21:14 AM
I stopped reading cracked back when that stupid fucking article on sexism was posted a few months ago. I used to respect Wong and Cheese a lot for their articles, but that SJW clickbait is just too easy money for them to pass up.

This thread was like identifying a body at the morgue. Yes that's him, you can put the sheet back over him now.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Failure to communicate on November 27, 2013, 03:55:50 PM
This just in : The author of that "Racist DNA" article is a goddamn manatee.

(http://i.imgur.com/ey3iqoY.jpg)

I-is that a skin suit? :stonk: Jesus fucking christ.  I think it sees us.  Don't flinch, it's vision is based on movement.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on November 27, 2013, 03:57:41 PM
wtf is wrong with her skin :stonk:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Bitter Weirdo on November 27, 2013, 04:04:31 PM
Look at the fucking orange peel in that makeup. Bitch needs to be wet sanded for a while.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on November 27, 2013, 05:59:31 PM
Her face looks like if you touch it it would give in and crumble like old cake. It is disturbing.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Hollywood Shabat Goy Yaro on November 27, 2013, 06:02:50 PM
That is one of the deadest pair of eyes I've ever seen.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Harry D Greek on November 27, 2013, 06:15:29 PM
This just in : The author of that "Racist DNA" article is a goddamn manatee.

(http://i.imgur.com/ey3iqoY.jpg)

I-is that a skin suit? :stonk: Jesus fucking christ.  I think it sees us.  Don't flinch, it's vision is based on movement.

lol, anyone who writes articles like that should have to put their picture up next to it so people can know that the article isn't based on actually interacting with people irl
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 27, 2013, 06:18:37 PM
two thoughts:

1) that could easily be a tranny
2) cracked's very own fistgrrl

Quote
lol, anyone who writes articles like that should have to put their picture up next to it so people can know that the article isn't based on actually interacting with people irl

you know she's pissed that she's never been seen as "just a pair of breasts"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on November 27, 2013, 06:37:32 PM
Look at the fucking orange peel in that makeup. Bitch needs to be wet sanded for a while.

Strip back to the bare metal, scrub with steel wool, remix primer with more flow improver, respray.

Yes I did spend time working in an auto body shop in my teens why do you ask.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on November 27, 2013, 06:40:54 PM
That is one of the deadest pair of eyes I've ever seen.

"Sometimes that shark, he looks right into you. Right into your eyes. You know the thing about a shark, he's got... lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'. Until he bites ya and those black eyes roll over white. And then, ah then you hear that terrible high pitch screamin' and the ocean turns red and spite of all the poundin' and the hollerin' they all come in and rip you to pieces."

 :say:

(http://www.mentellect.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/quint.jpg)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: VFW on November 27, 2013, 06:48:06 PM
That porkster wishes buck nigs liked her.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on November 27, 2013, 10:40:33 PM
- One pound of makeup caked on her face as a result of poor skin quality due to a lifestyle resulting in her obesity
- Lazy, dead looking eyes

I think they need to have pictures of these social justice warriors every time they write an article.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Fade to Vanilla on November 27, 2013, 10:46:22 PM
never seen pancake make-up applied so heavily that it could be measured with a yardstick
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on November 27, 2013, 11:00:05 PM
which part of the human genome is responsible for cheek fuzz. look under her ear goddamn
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on November 28, 2013, 03:37:59 AM
never seen pancake make-up applied so heavily that it could be measured with a yardstick

i've never seen make up applied so heavily without covering up whatever flaw it was supposed to cover up
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on November 28, 2013, 04:06:08 AM
never seen pancake make-up applied so heavily that it could be measured with a yardstick

i've never seen make up applied so heavily without covering up whatever flaw it was supposed to cover up

What if... it actually does ?  :rose:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Fade to Vanilla on November 28, 2013, 04:41:54 AM
never seen pancake make-up applied so heavily that it could be measured with a yardstick

i've never seen make up applied so heavily without covering up whatever flaw it was supposed to cover up

her face?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on December 04, 2013, 02:26:07 PM
cracked just published a perfectly good article on spycraft and couldn't resist calling james bond a date rapist

i'm done with cracked, never again

fuck this gay earth
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 05, 2013, 01:54:06 PM
and yeah cracked today about "6 obviously terrible things movie always portray as great" wasn't terrible until the top 3

"old fashioned stuff" which just goes into a tangent about how old stuff just sucks and we need to get rid of traditions etc in lieu of new things whenever they pop up. 
"split second decisions" of course you will see that as something that is bad when the worst pressure you feel in your day is whether to abide by the three second rule or not
"nuclear weapons" Seriously when is the last time we saw a movie where nuclear weapons were seen as a great thing? In 1945 inbetween Hiroshima and the first hippies protesting against it a few months later?

Nope, had to go ARGH THEY ARE EVIL WHy WONT PEOPLE GET THAT :madgoon:


also today's articles made me realize there was such a thing as "eye gazing parties" where you meet a bunch of strangers and just look at them in the eyes without saying anything and that just filled me with rage
:razor:

and John Cheese jsut wrote another article that might as well be entitled "I'm a dumbass, here are 5 things I realized over the last year of fucking up part 495". He needs a new schtick.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 05, 2013, 08:56:30 PM
and yeah cracked today about "6 obviously terrible things movie always portray as great" wasn't terrible until the top 3

"old fashioned stuff" which just goes into a tangent about how old stuff just sucks and we need to get rid of traditions etc in lieu of new things whenever they pop up. 
"split second decisions" of course you will see that as something that is bad when the worst pressure you feel in your day is whether to abide by the three second rule or not
"nuclear weapons" Seriously when is the last time we saw a movie where nuclear weapons were seen as a great thing? In 1945 inbetween Hiroshima and the first hippies protesting against it a few months later?

Nope, had to go ARGH THEY ARE EVIL WHy WONT PEOPLE GET THAT :madgoon:


also today's articles made me realize there was such a thing as "eye gazing parties" where you meet a bunch of strangers and just look at them in the eyes without saying anything and that just filled me with rage
:razor:

and John Cheese jsut wrote another article that might as well be entitled "I'm a dumbass, here are 5 things I realized over the last year of fucking up part 495". He needs a new schtick.

John Cheese tried to do a YouTube thing about cooking on a budget and it became readily apparent that he's a really unfunny person and needs to be edited by betters.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on December 05, 2013, 10:39:13 PM
also today's articles made me realize there was such a thing as "eye gazing parties" where you meet a bunch of strangers and just look at them in the eyes without saying anything and that just filled me with rage
:stare:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 06, 2013, 10:34:45 AM
just another example of why I fucking hate SJW bullshit. I think I found peak SJW bullshit in reviews.

American Horror Story is a show that was good for two seasons if you're in horror shit, but this season has been absolutely fucking terrible. My fiancee insists of finishing the rest of the season even though it's been terrible since last year's finale.

She emailed me this saying it'd send me into a rage. She was right. There are so many reasons why this season is terrible, I mean it's genuinely one of the worst things I've ever watched. The reviewer says he has a top 5 of the reasons why the show is terrible this season:

Quote
1.) The show has trouble extending its sympathy to anyone but white people. In fact, I’d say the show has trouble understanding anybody but white people.

...

Challenging art can make us sympathize with or feel pity for all manner of awful people. The film Downfall, for instance, doesn’t make you like Hitler, but it certainly puts you in his mindset as the end approaches, and I find that a remarkable movie. The problem with Coven is that it’s almost without exclusion able to extend this kind of sympathy to the white characters—to Fiona and Kyle and Zoe and Cordelia and Myrtle and LaLaurie and Nan and Madison and on and on—while being almost completely unable to extend any sympathy to its black characters.

...

It’s possible I’m being too sensitive to this because, as a good white liberal trying to be aware of my own privilege, who finally got around to seeing 12 Years A Slave last night and has it very much on the mind, I am going looking for outrage where outrage isn’t meant to exist. A couple of weeks ago, I thought the show’s racial politics merely clumsy. Now, I think they’re actually detracting from my enjoyment of the show.


5.) Coven says it’s all about empowerment, but nothing that happens in it is actually empowering.

This season wants so desperately to be about women and black people and the living dead taking back their power from their oppressors, but it’s, instead, mostly about a bunch of minorities doing battle with each other, rather than actually striking back at their oppressors. And I might think that that was some vicious social commentary on the part of the show’s writers, social commentary about how far too often, we let out own pet interests defeat our relationships with natural political allies, but I really think that they just think it will be funny to have great actresses hiss at each other for a while. There’s no greater level to the satire or political commentary. It simply extends to “If you give women powers, that’s feminism!” without understanding that empowering a character requires, necessarily, taking that power from someone who would traditionally have it.

jesus christ.

:dinorage: :razor: :dinorage:

This thing is like a fucking cult. The more you consume their movies and tv shows and music and listen to them pontificating, the more pozzed you become and everything you see becomes filtered through that lens. I am seeing this shit just grow everywhere faster and faster and more people becoming pozzed it's starting to feel like I'm in the middle of a really weak and beta bodysnatchers invasion.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 06, 2013, 10:36:28 AM
and his criticism comes right after an episode where, for no reason whatsover, Patti LuPone gives someone an enema while singing about the cleansing power of jesus.

which sounds like a pretty specific fetish that probably made a dozen men happy all over the world.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Harry D Greek on December 06, 2013, 10:42:51 AM
American Horror Story gotta be the most pozzed show I've seen an episode of, lol at it still not being good enough for the SJWs
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 06, 2013, 10:46:01 AM
Well you need to watch shit like Glee or Modern Family if you think AHS is the most pozzed thing you've seen. Excluding this season. This season is peak pozz. And peak cougar on twink enemas.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on December 06, 2013, 12:25:56 PM
Quote
Fiona and Kyle and Zoe and Cordelia and Myrtle and LaLaurie and Nan and Madison
:facepalm:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: armchair nazi on December 06, 2013, 01:11:53 PM
Well you need to watch shit like Glee or Modern Family if you think AHS is the most pozzed thing you've seen. Excluding this season. This season is peak pozz. And peak cougar on twink enemas.
brooklyn 99 is a STRONG competitor for most pozzed show
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 06, 2013, 01:17:23 PM
well it's a show that was literally pitched and greenlit on "This is Parks & Rec but in a police station and now we've got two fat guys and Ron is black :goonette: "
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: armchair nazi on December 06, 2013, 04:05:29 PM
not just black

gay

GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY DID WE MENTION GAY
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: armchair nazi on December 06, 2013, 04:11:16 PM
also every character on brooklyn 99 is essentially a combination of characters from the office and parks and rec, its like they listed the character traits of all those characters, put them in a bag, and randomly started picking to make the new characters for 99
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Kill all goons on December 06, 2013, 04:26:38 PM
I REALLY REALLY HATE JOHN CHEESE'S ARTICLES HOLY FUCK.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: spengler on December 08, 2013, 11:58:04 AM
SJWs are unemployed and a demographic target that people are not going to want to target in the first place.

Do you really think this is true? My take is that goons as a demographic are more likely to be unemployed than SJWs. The most SWJy people I know in real life all have white collar jobs, many of them with degrees in technical/legal fields.

Of course, I don't hang out with unemployed people very much, so maybe I'm just observing my own demographic bias.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 08, 2013, 12:56:14 PM
It depends what you're talking about. You're talking about "SJWy people" while I'm talking about the actual SJWs. That's like the difference between people who supported the Occupy movement and the people who spent a month sleeping in tents mainlining heroin and not protecting girls from homeless rapists and shit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 12, 2013, 12:22:51 PM
lmao from the cracked comment section where  the article was literally from a boring catlady ( http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-tips-socially-awkward-gal/ ):

Quote
What actually is the reason for clubs? I genuinely cannot understand the thought processes that go from "I wish to socialise with other humans" to "I will do this by standing in a dark, sweaty box rammed full of douchebags where I cannot hear a word anyone says unless they are literally shouting as loud as they possibly can, nor can I see anything or move without spilling someone's drink, all while stone cold f*****g sobre because I am not queueing for 20 minutes to spend £4.50 on a single f*****g pint."

:aspero:

today is a good day for goony articles, this one especially:
http://www.cracked.com/article_20727_5-reasons-video-game-industry-about-to-crash.html

the list opens up with "they put people who know finance and not the intricacies of console wars in charge :parsons:"


5 - Why are you putting people who know about finance in control (of companies) instead of gamers?
4 - why are you putting people who know about finance in control (of budgets) instead of gamers?
3 - why are you putting people who know about finance in control (of marketing) instead of gamers?
2 - why are you putting people who know about finance in control (of publicity) instead of gamers?
1 - why are you putting people who know about finance in control (of everything) instead of gamers?

The video games market will crash because it's managed by people who care about making more money. Occupy steam :madgoon:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 16, 2013, 11:15:47 AM
http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/4-stupid-ads-that-had-no-goddamn-clue-how-to-appeal-to-women/

:christina: ads directed to regular woman and not fat goonettes who play lots of video games? YOU GUYS DON'T KNOW HOW ADVERTISING REALLY WORKS
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on December 16, 2013, 11:38:32 AM
http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/4-stupid-ads-that-had-no-goddamn-clue-how-to-appeal-to-women/

:christina: ads directed to regular woman and not fat goonettes who play lots of video games? YOU GUYS DON'T KNOW HOW ADVERTISING REALLY WORKS

With Cracked.com's increased traffic, its standards have also tightened. Only the smartest and funniest of aspiring comedians are allowed to publish articles on such a prestigious site:

(http://i.imgur.com/9MZo0jY.png)

https://twitter.com/HilleryAlley/status/405838299102593024
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on December 16, 2013, 07:15:31 PM
Let's find embarrassing examples of sexist advertising in places people are likely to see it. A website selling irons, a New Zealand credit union, and an internal ad for Samsung hard drives. This misogyny culture is really deep-seated

whatever, at least the writer really has a gift for comedy

(http://i.imgur.com/gxqFkbY.jpg)


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA is Hillery Alley an anagram of that tranny comedian Avery? The jokes are just as killer
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on December 16, 2013, 07:17:41 PM
fuck
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on December 17, 2013, 09:28:32 AM
will someone knock winston "888" rowntree off his soapbox already.

e: oh holy lol. these people are fucking broken

(http://i.imgur.com/rrOiWYM.jpg)

:allears:

Yes, people who think stupid people shouldn't be allowed to outbreed smart people (as they are), are literally Hitler addressing the Reichstag.

Also lol at people who get that butthurt over not being attracted to all races.  No, it's not fucking racist if you're not attracted to a certain race of people, you stupid fucking idiots.

I'm sure some will :smug: that and be like "that's EXACTLY what it is", but congratulations on not understanding the fundamentals of how attraction works I guess.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on December 17, 2013, 09:59:49 AM
another work of comedy genius by celebrated comic artist Winston ":888:" Rowntree  :pound:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 17, 2013, 11:47:07 AM
jesus christ. "5 shocking failures in 2013 we should have seen coming" started alright but in the middle of it, he actually fucking whiteknighted healthcare.gov :tuss: It's totes normal to spend a billion dollars on a website and have it be unusable for months bra. You should have expected it and there's no reason to complain about it.

I'm 99% convinced it was first conceived as an article to defend Obamacare and then he built the rest around it as an afterthought
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on December 17, 2013, 02:14:37 PM
All cracked articles have become :888:

(I'm glad we have that emot now)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on December 17, 2013, 07:29:06 PM
All cracked articles have become :888:

(I'm glad we have that emot now)
to this day, ive not read that shit
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 17, 2013, 07:32:03 PM
I wanted to once but I realized I'd have to squint my eyes and looking like wimpb even for 30 seconds wasn't worth the knowledge of what is written there
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on December 17, 2013, 08:43:43 PM
will someone knock winston "888" rowntree off his soapbox already.

e: oh holy lol. these people are fucking broken

(http://i.imgur.com/rrOiWYM.jpg)


what always gets me about the "I HATE GAY MARRIAGE = I'M IN THE CLOSET I SECRETLY LOVE DICKS" thing is that it still assumes homosexuality be abnormal, weird and negative. By their own poz logic, saying someone is gay to make fun of them is the worst crime ever and how Holocausts get rolling


 :unparsons: LOL this rethugliKKKan congressman was caught sucking cocks in a bus station bathroom LOL
 :parsons:  Someone called a linebacker a 'pussy' in an NFL thread! What hateful language! I demand a permaban!!!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Huffington Post on December 17, 2013, 09:20:16 PM

what always gets me about the "I HATE GAY MARRIAGE = I'M IN THE CLOSET I SECRETLY LOVE DICKS" thing is that it still assumes homosexuality be abnormal, weird and negative. By their own poz logic, saying someone is gay to make fun of them is the worst crime ever and how Holocausts get rolling


 :unparsons: LOL this rethugliKKKan congressman was caught sucking cocks in a bus station bathroom LOL
 :parsons:  Someone called a linebacker a 'pussy' in an NFL thread! What hateful language! I demand a permaban!!!

troons do it to. Any time a guy makes a comment that they decide is transphobic, a bunch of them come along and tell him he only hates them because he secretly wants to fuck them. I guess even troons realize that only a broken weirdo would want to have sex with a troon.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Internet Catchphrase on December 17, 2013, 11:25:19 PM
Its the typical grade school 'i know u are but what am i' mentality that a fucked up mind like a cock mutilator still has today, having never progressed to a higher thought process than sophistry.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on December 18, 2013, 12:47:51 AM
"The loudest homophobes are often secret gays" is a real thing, they even did an actual study in relatively pre-pozzed years (early 90's) where they showed gay porn to a bunch of self-proclaimed straight test subjects and the ones with anti-gay opinions tended to get more chubs.

It's not exactly an inexplicable mystery though. If you think being gay is OK, either you're straight or you will come out of the closet at the first chance (or maybe not, but either way you won't lie about it to the researchers). If you don't think being gay is OK, that's when you're going to stay in the closet to everybody and everyone despite the fact that for the last several decades you've been able to have a pretty safe life even while loving the cock.

So it's not so much "anti-gay beliefs -> must be a closeted cocksucker lol" as much as it is "closeted cocksucker -> anti-gay beliefs are one of the few reasons to still be in the closet".
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on December 18, 2013, 02:03:26 AM
"The loudest homophobes are often secret gays" is a real thing, they even did an actual study in relatively pre-pozzed years (early 90's) where they showed gay porn to a bunch of self-proclaimed straight test subjects and the ones with anti-gay opinions tended to get more chubs.

It's not exactly an inexplicable mystery though. If you think being gay is OK, either you're straight or you will come out of the closet at the first chance (or maybe not, but either way you won't lie about it to the researchers). If you don't think being gay is OK, that's when you're going to stay in the closet to everybody and everyone despite the fact that for the last several decades you've been able to have a pretty safe life even while loving the cock.

So it's not so much "anti-gay beliefs -> must be a closeted cocksucker lol" as much as it is "closeted cocksucker -> anti-gay beliefs are one of the few reasons to still be in the closet".
People who vehemently hate gays are not secretly closeted homosexuals. They're usually called religious people.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Professor of Niggerology on December 18, 2013, 02:14:16 AM
"The loudest homophobes are often secret gays" is a real thing, they even did an actual study in relatively pre-pozzed years (early 90's) where they showed gay porn to a bunch of self-proclaimed straight test subjects and the ones with anti-gay opinions tended to get more chubs.

It's not exactly an inexplicable mystery though. If you think being gay is OK, either you're straight or you will come out of the closet at the first chance (or maybe not, but either way you won't lie about it to the researchers). If you don't think being gay is OK, that's when you're going to stay in the closet to everybody and everyone despite the fact that for the last several decades you've been able to have a pretty safe life even while loving the cock.

So it's not so much "anti-gay beliefs -> must be a closeted cocksucker lol" as much as it is "closeted cocksucker -> anti-gay beliefs are one of the few reasons to still be in the closet".
im pretty sure the study you are referring to was garbage but that doesnt stop people from quoting it like the gospel
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on December 18, 2013, 06:33:54 AM
All cracked articles have become :888:

(I'm glad we have that emot now)

(http://i.imgur.com/0bEDGtE.png)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Gas Chamber of Commerce on December 18, 2013, 07:24:00 AM
if you're going to link to cracked articles please pastebin that shit
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 18, 2013, 08:00:51 AM
there was actually a Cracked article that went against the "anti-gay people are gay" thing coincidentally enough
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on December 18, 2013, 08:12:12 AM
coincidentally enough

don't do this don't abuse adverbs
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 18, 2013, 08:21:42 AM
Oh yeah one dumb thing about Cracked, aside from the sjw stuff, is that the job of their editors is to make sure every single article reads like it's written by the same person. One of the writers complained once outside of Cracked that they completely changed the tone of an article he wrote, from "spiders are cool" to "spiders are objectively evil disgusting vermin that should be burned to death" (because Cracked readers are babies who can relate to having a panic attack over small things that can't even hurt them).

Ever notice how so many of the more serious articles have the same David Wong-wannabe writing? That's very likely why.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on December 18, 2013, 09:05:33 AM
holy fucking shit I have found the absolute bottom of leftthink, sjw, we are the 99% #occupy mindset.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-valuable-lessons-you-only-learn-from-having-crappy-job/

 :razor:  :hulkout:

and of course that shit was written and illustrated by...

 :888:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 18, 2013, 09:14:47 AM
http://www.cracked.com/article_19118_the-good-bad-ugly-video-games-5Bcomic5D.html lol 888 comic guy tell me more about how video games need to be 300 hour sand boxes that you pretend to live in and that trick you into thinking you have autonomy to be fun

also he whines about OBJECTIFYING design but likes Chun-Li ummmmmmmmm
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on December 18, 2013, 10:42:53 AM
this part is p spot on though:

(http://i.imgur.com/9KkknYY.png)

See, the thing about Winston Rowntree is that he's not a completely talentless hack. To be sure, he was always a pozzed-out (http://www.viruscomix.com/page339.html) leftist (http://www.viruscomix.com/page338.html) petty feminist (http://www.viruscomix.com/page330.html) pseudo-intellectual (http://www.viruscomix.com/page414.html), yeah.

But he could also be funny (http://www.viruscomix.com/page389.html), unexpected (http://www.viruscomix.com/page423.html), visually catchy (http://www.viruscomix.com/page431.html) and even his :888: could be restrained (http://www.viruscomix.com/page400.html) and used with purpose, aware it wasn't going to be read (http://www.viruscomix.com/page487.html).

And he occasionally had this pop-insight that wasn't preachy (http://www.viruscomix.com/page471.html), knew first world problems aren't real problems (http://www.viruscomix.com/page528.html), and looked genuinely cool (http://www.viruscomix.com/page500.html).

I think he's the sort of artist who really would have benefited from working in traditional publication, with an editor who wouldn't tolerate self-indulgent crap from a newbie, and who would have forced him to stay lean, focus on his strengths, and not alienate everybody who disagreed with his views on politics and music.

But instead he came of age in the Web 2.0 era, where he could start his own little website and grab a niche of equally insufferable pseudo-alternative college students, and absolutely nobody to tell him what worked and what didn't. So he was able to stick around and tread water until he found an outlet which had the exact same outlook (Cracked.com). And he's only going to get worse from now on.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on December 18, 2013, 10:54:23 AM

http://www.viruscomix.com/page471.html http://www.viruscomix.com/page528.html http://www.viruscomix.com/page500.html

(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QBwUuiehwBQ/T4IExllkxQI/AAAAAAAAA5Y/Rrxy4fkHypc/s1600/george-bush-gif.gif)

seriously in that strip he bitches about a lara croft type, designed by committee pixel fuckdoll, then later complains that the one character who's probably used by more goons as wank material than any other got a sensible outfit

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SSOUL TRANN on December 18, 2013, 10:56:06 AM
if you're going to link to cracked articles please pastebin that shit
yeah please stop giving those faggots pageviews
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 18, 2013, 11:35:34 AM
His art style is pretty boring even if he has some nice ideas. Doesn't really go far enough in any interesting direction.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Kill all goons on December 18, 2013, 12:15:32 PM
Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooords.jpg
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 18, 2013, 02:28:48 PM
jesus christ. I think this is one of the worst things I've ever seen:
(http://i.imgur.com/AJxh33X.jpg)

Someone unironically said that giving good service at your job is "kind of heroic"

:lilal: :dinorage:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on December 18, 2013, 03:14:10 PM
rowntree's kind of a preachy faggot but i enjoy his art style and he has more on his mind than just videogames so meh I fucks with it
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Babomb on December 18, 2013, 05:36:58 PM
jesus christ. I think this is one of the worst things I've ever seen:
(http://i.imgur.com/AJxh33X.jpg)

Someone unironically said that giving good service at your job is "kind of heroic"

:lilal: :dinorage:
This just in: not being a douche to people is "kind of heroic"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: High Impact Sexbot 2020 on December 18, 2013, 06:30:12 PM
Put plate on table despite my self-perpetuating victim complex. A hero.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on December 18, 2013, 06:34:13 PM
shitman's family diner
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on December 18, 2013, 07:34:42 PM
Quote from: Winston 'socially calamitous' Rowntree
Additionally, people can't get good jobs because they just don't have any connections. Think about how you got your job/apartment/romantic partner, if you have a good one. Was it because you knew someone?

I didn't know anyone, and that was either because of or the cause of my other problem, which was/is an absence of social skills and confidence. You're not gonna get a good job when you're too socially calamitous to go hand out resumes


What a goony faggot. Nepotism in itself isn't bad for Social Justice Winston, it's that he's unable to benefit from it because he's an awkward gimp

for the goon->English translation thread:
'socially calamitous'   =   fedora-wearing creeper with audible mouth breathing noise
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OSI on December 18, 2013, 11:22:01 PM
Why am I not surprised the two biggest hand wringing faggots that post here are defending this lefty sjw. :allears:

MGD its alright bro you don't need to quote bullshit "studies" to hide behind we already know you're a faggot.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 18, 2013, 11:49:31 PM
Why am I not surprised the two biggest hand wringing faggots that post here are defending this lefty sjw. :allears:

MGD its alright bro you don't need to quote bullshit "studies" to hide behind we already know you're a faggot.
I'm pretty leftist and found myself siding with something sensitive user " DICKS CURE DYKES" during one of your arguments with him (the one about workplace inequity buried somewhere in the feminism thread), and I still think the cracked 888 comics guy is lame as shit and draws competent and not-really-annoying, yet also very non-noteworthy art. He doesn't really go to particularly interesting directions with his stylization but his characters also lack the organicness to be interestingly realistic(ish).

A problem with the "aliens attacking earth because of vanilla ice lol lmao" comic is that the joke delivery was too wordy. It wasn't a bad idea but comedy works best when the punchline just comes along and you don't spend a couple of panels preparing for its arrival and making it a nice cup of tea.

And his political views seem copypasted from his peers.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on December 19, 2013, 12:28:06 AM
hangly man is a more competent cartoonist than winston rowntree
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 19, 2013, 12:45:53 AM
Oddly enough I agree
(http://i.imgur.com/GraQoan.png)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Fade to Vanilla on December 19, 2013, 06:52:12 AM
i cannot get the kind of drugs here in this country that would let me read all that shit.  goddamn, that's some fabulous furry freak bros. cartoonin' there.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 19, 2013, 10:35:24 AM
lmao http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-facts-about-being-poor-from-rich-person/

pure :christina: makes an article mocking the rich by pretending to be rich and mocking the poor and it's just so much bullshit
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on December 19, 2013, 01:44:46 PM
It seems like an avalanche of SJW articles are getting pushed out in the past few weeks.  Looking back on this thread, it looks like they dipped their big toe in the water and now they're going all in.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 19, 2013, 01:47:44 PM
yeah it's pretty crazy, in a month it went from "wow in the last 4 months they had three pure SJW articles" to a recent peak of three in a day
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on December 19, 2013, 01:52:43 PM
Looking at Google trends for cracked.com, it looks like it is taking a big dip.  From their peak in September 2011, they're down to about half of their peak traffic.  I know Gawker likes to write clickbait/linkbait, I wonder if this SJW shit is an attempt to gain more pageviews.

Except for me because I'm going to go on that stupid and shitty site anymore.  Fuck them.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on December 19, 2013, 08:04:38 PM
Why am I not surprised the two biggest hand wringing faggots that post here are defending this lefty sjw. :allears:

MGD its alright bro you don't need to quote bullshit "studies" to hide behind we already know you're a faggot.

 :coolmad: i love you too buddy
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 22, 2013, 01:24:10 AM
Oh yeah one dumb thing about Cracked, aside from the sjw stuff, is that the job of their editors is to make sure every single article reads like it's written by the same person. One of the writers complained once outside of Cracked that they completely changed the tone of an article he wrote, from "spiders are cool" to "spiders are objectively evil disgusting vermin that should be burned to death" (because Cracked readers are babies who can relate to having a panic attack over small things that can't even hurt them).

Ever notice how so many of the more serious articles have the same David Wong-wannabe writing? That's very likely why.

I used to post in their sandbox.  I'd say roughly 65% of the content in any given article is completely rewritten by either David Wong, Jack O'Brien or Daniel O'Brien, the others were barely involved but that might have changed in recent years.  They make a big to-do about how they're doing you a service because Movie Director And New York Times Best Seller David Wong is writing under YOUR name!  He's a certified Funny Man and you should feel blessed that he'd do this for you and not even ask for credit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 25, 2013, 03:33:52 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-old-news-stories-media-pretended-were-new-this-year/

"Quentin Tarantino is a literal white supremacist"
\
 :goonette:

Oh yeah one dumb thing about Cracked, aside from the sjw stuff, is that the job of their editors is to make sure every single article reads like it's written by the same person. One of the writers complained once outside of Cracked that they completely changed the tone of an article he wrote, from "spiders are cool" to "spiders are objectively evil disgusting vermin that should be burned to death" (because Cracked readers are babies who can relate to having a panic attack over small things that can't even hurt them).

Ever notice how so many of the more serious articles have the same David Wong-wannabe writing? That's very likely why.

I used to post in their sandbox.  I'd say roughly 65% of the content in any given article is completely rewritten by either David Wong, Jack O'Brien or Daniel O'Brien, the others were barely involved but that might have changed in recent years.  They make a big to-do about how they're doing you a service because Movie Director And New York Times Best Seller David Wong is writing under YOUR name!  He's a certified Funny Man and you should feel blessed that he'd do this for you and not even ask for credit.
What do you mean by sandbox? Because it would be pretty funny if this was legit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 25, 2013, 03:43:12 AM
So I'm reading the comments
Quote
Dead n****r storage is ALWAYS uncomfortable and wrong.
lol

Edit:
Quote

I'm black and I've used the word more times than I can remember growing up. Rap. Hip Hop. Whatever you want to call it, is littered with the word so it was commonplace for me. Having grown up and learned the history behind it, I no longer side with the "let the word lose its power" argument. My brother still uses it freely eg "Man...these Ns drive me crazy." I don't say anything to him about it, but I choose to not use it/repeat it. What changed my opinion on it was learning stories about how blacks were abused and killed. I saw pictures of lynchings, blacks being attacked by dogs pre/during the civil rights era, and it stuck with me that "while these people were being tortured, or running for their lives from mobs, that word was probably the only recognizable sound that they could make out over the roar and their own screams."

After that, considering how many people have been viciously killed, with that word being the last recognizable word falling on their ears, I decided I'd never use it again. Likewise, I don't use ethnic slangs for other races, or people of different sexual orientation. Every time I hear the "the if we stopped talking about it as offensive, it will lose its impact" argument I think "tell that to the people that were dragged behind trucks as it was yelled at them." Do you think it would console them to know that, if nothing else, this word will lose all its meaning in a couple decades because we no longer maintain its role as offensive?
I respect this dude way more than 'progressive' white people saying shit like "racial slurs are ok against the right people :)". Guy is super PC but actually sticks to his guns.

Edit edit:

(http://i.imgur.com/VAvEX4f.png)
lol

Edit edit edit:
Quote
In a world where George Zimmerman is out there pulling his gat on whoever looks at him funny and Trayvon Martin isn't a living person anymore,
jesus christ
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 26, 2013, 05:09:58 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-old-news-stories-media-pretended-were-new-this-year/

"Quentin Tarantino is a literal white supremacist"
\
 :goonette:

Oh yeah one dumb thing about Cracked, aside from the sjw stuff, is that the job of their editors is to make sure every single article reads like it's written by the same person. One of the writers complained once outside of Cracked that they completely changed the tone of an article he wrote, from "spiders are cool" to "spiders are objectively evil disgusting vermin that should be burned to death" (because Cracked readers are babies who can relate to having a panic attack over small things that can't even hurt them).

Ever notice how so many of the more serious articles have the same David Wong-wannabe writing? That's very likely why.

I used to post in their sandbox.  I'd say roughly 65% of the content in any given article is completely rewritten by either David Wong, Jack O'Brien or Daniel O'Brien, the others were barely involved but that might have changed in recent years.  They make a big to-do about how they're doing you a service because Movie Director And New York Times Best Seller David Wong is writing under YOUR name!  He's a certified Funny Man and you should feel blessed that he'd do this for you and not even ask for credit.
What do you mean by sandbox? Because it would be pretty funny if this was legit.

On the Pointless Waste of Time boards there is a hidden forums for user-submitted content.  It's been redesigned since I've last been there, but there was a big sticky from Wong about the rules and everything and one of the last bullets was "What do I do if my article looks completely different!?" and his response was some drivel about THE CRACKED VOICE and then some other moderators chimed in saying "Yeah we had that happen to us and it sucks, but now as moderators we feel fortunate that happened.  We got WORLD CLASS TALENT pretending to be us!  What could be better?"  That was a big reason I quit being interested in CRACKED, when you look under the hood it's a massive circle jerk over David Wong and Christina "Let me tell you about my cats" H.

Another cool thing.  Because the barrier to entry to the hidden forums is literally just posting in one thread asking to get in, tons of copycat sites will post the exact same article as CRACKED but with more points (editors usually ask for ten examples in their lists and take the top five) and will get them to print days in advance.  This has been acknowledged by David Wong since 2011 but this shit still keeps happening.

I can post more about my time there if you want.  It's infinitely worse than anything Lowtax has done.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 26, 2013, 05:49:21 PM
do go on
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 26, 2013, 09:30:58 PM
User submitted content, when approved and posted, earn the writer $50, but what do you do when you're just a child and cannot legally be paid?  David Wong says: just get your dad's social security and say he did it.  This was a legitimate problem for a few months because of a new feature the site was trying to roll out that I'll talk about later.

There is literally no fact checking.  Absolutely zero.  If you post a rough draft to the sandbox of something like "Ass-Kicking Badasses (That Are Really Just Misunderstood Sweethearts)" and say "Ghengis Khan used to sleep with a blanket - http://www.en.wikipedia.org/randombullshit" it will go through completely unchallenged so long as the url citation is from a reasonably famous website (they have cited Tumblr on many occasions)

There was a planned feature for the website that came around when Wong was Googling Batman The Dark Knight and found out that CRACKED wasn't on the first page of results so he decided to game Google Search Results by making Wacky Summaries (can't remember the name).  The idea was for users to write silly summaries for really famous movies and a simple voting system would determine which were the best.  The highest rated summaries would be featured in a rotation on the front page and the writer would get a pittance.  Over time, Wacky Summaries would include television series, radio dramas, YouTube channels and music albums.  It was completely blatant click bait: the URLs looked like www.cracked.com/batman_(1965) and the text, formatting and images were all lifted from IMDb.  There were ghost links to actors and movies that didn't exist anywhere on the CRACKED servers because the webadmin lifted code from IMDb.  The excuse at the time was that it was just temporary and everything would be solved before the feature was rolled out (spoilers: this never got fixed).  Wacky Summaries Beta was posted in the sandbox and to make sure all 1000 of the top grossing movies of all time (as determined by IMDb) got summaries, CRACKED.com would pay $5 to whoever managed to post the first summary for every movie.  This turned out as well as expected.  When it was time to cash out, a whole bunch of users turned out to be underaged and freaked out because Wong made some huge post about "We gotta pay you because we don't want to get sued!" and they didn't want the site to get in trouble.  Three months later Wacky Summaries was completely scrubbed from CRACKED.com.

Pointless Waste of Time has been beyond dead for the last half decade.  Half of the posters are moderators or admins.  It's incredibly sad.  Abbreviations and the edit button are banned from PWOT so if you accidentally post

btw ur gay

some wacky ass moderator will swoop in and edit in,

Big Tittied Women ur you are gay

I don't exactly understand how Mesopotamia is relevant to this discussion about homosexuality, so I took the liberty of assuming it was a mistype.  Happy PWOTting! -D

This happens in seconds because the moderators are autistic as fuck.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 26, 2013, 09:31:22 PM
There's more but I need some time to remember details.  Biggest point is, CRACKED.com will openly admit to breaking the law over a twenty dollar paycheck.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on December 26, 2013, 09:58:29 PM
User submitted content, when approved and posted, earn the writer $50, but what do you do when you're just a child and cannot legally be paid?  David Wong says: just get your dad's social security and say he did it.  This was a legitimate problem for a few months because of a new feature the site was trying to roll out that I'll talk about later.

There is literally no fact checking.  Absolutely zero.  If you post a rough draft to the sandbox of something like "Ass-Kicking Badasses (That Are Really Just Misunderstood Sweethearts)" and say "Ghengis Khan used to sleep with a blanket - http://www.en.wikipedia.org/randombullshit" it will go through completely unchallenged so long as the url citation is from a reasonably famous website (they have cited Tumblr on many occasions)

There was a planned feature for the website that came around when Wong was Googling Batman The Dark Knight and found out that CRACKED wasn't on the first page of results so he decided to game Google Search Results by making Wacky Summaries (can't remember the name).  The idea was for users to write silly summaries for really famous movies and a simple voting system would determine which were the best.  The highest rated summaries would be featured in a rotation on the front page and the writer would get a pittance.  Over time, Wacky Summaries would include television series, radio dramas, YouTube channels and music albums.  It was completely blatant click bait: the URLs looked like www.cracked.com/batman_(1965) and the text, formatting and images were all lifted from IMDb.  There were ghost links to actors and movies that didn't exist anywhere on the CRACKED servers because the webadmin lifted code from IMDb.  The excuse at the time was that it was just temporary and everything would be solved before the feature was rolled out (spoilers: this never got fixed).  Wacky Summaries Beta was posted in the sandbox and to make sure all 1000 of the top grossing movies of all time (as determined by IMDb) got summaries, CRACKED.com would pay $5 to whoever managed to post the first summary for every movie.  This turned out as well as expected.  When it was time to cash out, a whole bunch of users turned out to be underaged and freaked out because Wong made some huge post about "We gotta pay you because we don't want to get sued!" and they didn't want the site to get in trouble.  Three months later Wacky Summaries was completely scrubbed from CRACKED.com.

Pointless Waste of Time has been beyond dead for the last half decade.  Half of the posters are moderators or admins.  It's incredibly sad.  Abbreviations and the edit button are banned from PWOT so if you accidentally post

btw ur gay

some wacky ass moderator will swoop in and edit in,

Big Tittied Women ur you are gay

I don't exactly understand how Mesopotamia is relevant to this discussion about homosexuality, so I took the liberty of assuming it was a mistype.  Happy PWOTting! -D

This happens in seconds because the moderators are autistic as fuck.

DCCCLXXXVIII
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 26, 2013, 10:03:18 PM
Oh yeah the single most annoying thing.  If you post a smilie, a mod will edit it out and say

We don't "do" smilies here.

They all do this.  They all put the quotes around do and everything.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on December 26, 2013, 10:13:19 PM
Fun read. Though as pathetic as all that sounds, Wong still can't hold a candle to Lowtax in sadness. (Rich would have set a $50 fee for the privilege of publishing articles, and Cracked.com nowadays would be an obscure relic of a website.)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 26, 2013, 10:18:39 PM
Fun read. Though as pathetic as all that sounds, Wong still can't hold a candle to Lowtax in sadness. (Rich would have set a $50 fee for the privilege of publishing articles, and Cracked.com nowadays would be an obscure relic of a website.)

David Wong's avatar is a picture of himself yelling about a movie with Prince's Purple Rain jacket he photoshopped himself into.  He's almost 40, unmarried, and his best (and only) friend is a recovering alcoholic who can't shut the fuck up about being a recovering alcoholic for more than an hour.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on December 26, 2013, 10:20:18 PM
Cracked's forums SERIOUSLY need an interface update. Those forums look like a web class project designed by collage kids in the late 90's.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 26, 2013, 10:21:24 PM
Cracked's forums SERIOUSLY need an interface update. Those forums look like a web class project designed by collage kids in the late 90's.

They actually updated it a year ago, it used to look worse.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 26, 2013, 10:22:12 PM
To be honest, I dunno if the heavy editing thing is as bad as what SA has been doing to get traffic for years on end: have people pay to register and submit funny content (i.e. do your work for you), then take said funny content and plaster the "SOMETHINGAWFUL.COM" logo on it. So when the picture gets reposted nobody will know who did it - but they'll know to visit Something Awful dot com! And everyone rolled with it because they were just contributing to the hilarious SA hivemind while filling Lowtax's pockets with extra chair money.

Remember when Maddox pointed that out in the Maddox vs. SA shitstorm eons ago? Remember when some time passed and Maddox decided "eh, it's in the past, I got no hard feelings towards Lowtax" because he's a normal person? And Lowtax reacted to this by making a "lol fuck Maddox for getting media attention, that fucking faggot" thread on FYAD (a forum invisible to unregistered/banned users, because that's how Lowtax rolls) which was then followed by FYAD goons sucking up to him by making stale sarcastic posts that basically amounted to "don't worry daddy, you're better than this lamestream LOSER".
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on December 26, 2013, 10:28:02 PM
Cracked's forums SERIOUSLY need an interface update. Those forums look like a web class project designed by collage kids in the late 90's.
They actually updated it a year ago, it used to look worse.

I've never understood this shit with most of the internet. At least SA and this place have updated, modern looking forums that are easy to read.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 26, 2013, 10:30:36 PM
Cracked's forums SERIOUSLY need an interface update. Those forums look like a web class project designed by collage kids in the late 90's.
They actually updated it a year ago, it used to look worse.

I've never understood this shit with most of the internet. At least SA and this place have updated, modern looking forums that are easy to read.

In PWOT's case there's no incentive to update because there's no community left.  Everyone's gone.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OSI on December 26, 2013, 10:35:01 PM
Didn't David Wong have a falling out with the publishing house who originally pushed "Scott dies at the end" or whatever?  IIRC the moment he started seeing sales he jumped to a larger press.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 26, 2013, 10:38:54 PM
Didn't David Wong have a falling out with the publishing house who originally pushed "Scott dies at the end" or whatever?  IIRC the moment he started seeing sales he jumped to a larger press.

David Wong is a huge piece of shit and will be the topic of my next big post.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OSI on December 26, 2013, 10:52:54 PM
Didn't David Wong have a falling out with the publishing house who originally pushed "Scott dies at the end" or whatever?  IIRC the moment he started seeing sales he jumped to a larger press.

David Wong is a huge piece of shit and will be the topic of my next big post.

:uaears:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on December 26, 2013, 10:56:50 PM
David Wong is a huge piece of shit and will be the topic of my next big post.
:rock: Please, do tell.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 26, 2013, 11:15:19 PM
David Wong: Piece of Shit

As I stated before, Jason Pargin has publicly admitted to breaking labor laws.  Outside of that,

(http://i.imgur.com/7C5Jf7s.png)

This motherfucker started the fat acceptance movement.

---

One of the first things you'll notice if you spend a few days on PWOT is how fucking often Davie posts.  It's truly incredible, 13 and a half posts every day for the last 10 years.  Only, he never replies to anyone outside of John Cheese and Christina H.  How does he post so much then?  Like so:

PWOT > D&D > Which one's better, a cat or a dog?

(User 1)  I like cats but I want your opinion!

(Mod 1) Dog, they taste the best.

(User 2) Mod 1, I disagree.  Cat is a delicacy in many Asian countries.

(David Wong) Alright, I've seen numerous threads through the course of my ownership of the Pointless Waste of Time fourms, and this is how this thread is going to work.  If you only post a one line reply, you get a strike.  If you quote the message above you, you get a strike.  Three strikes and you're banned.  These threads are honey pots and a complete waste of human thought and I don't want PWOT to be associated with it.
As for the debate, I feel a strong preference to dogs due to the fact that I had grown up on a puppy mill.  Cats, on the other hand, are a great choice for those who like little assholes who eat your food and poop on your floor.  Both opinions are valid but one is absolutely correct.

(User 3)^^I like dogs too.
I fucking warned you just a post ago, two strikes.  Get the hell out of here.

(David Wong)This thread bores me.  Closed until further notice.

-locked-

-unlocked-

(Christina H)I like cats!

-locked-

No one ever replies to him.  Every thread he posts in, he comes in like a wrecking ball, completely disregards any discussion that came before, lays down ground rules for the thread and then leaves.

I dunno if he'd admit it NOW but in the past Wong said that he's only voted republican for a pretty long time.

I really liked his writing on pointlesswasteoftime.com (as in, his old website before Cracked.com even existed) and I'm pretty sure he only became this way in recent years. He still has some traces of realtalk left in him, like when he called out DocEvil's shitty Trayvon tweets, but he's certainly taken one too many steps towards populist tumblrshit territory.

It's really weird, even in recent years his writing has shifted back and forth between 'women are practically enslaved by men in the western world' to HTFU bootstraps-type advice (aimed at everyone). It's like he sometimes does Tumblr stuff to clear his name and appeal to the modern internet more.

He also seems like a colossal douchebag on Neogaf. Every post I've read by him has been some holier-than-thou epic burn.

His political philosophy, leanings and opinions are all contrarian.  He's constantly in the "right" no matter what the situation is.  He voted for Bush twice and Obama twice.  First time he voted for Obama he said that the Republican party had strayed too far away from its roots and didn't fully represent his opinions.  Guess what he said after the NSA fiasco.  He says shit and then contradicts himself a few months later because all he knows is click bait, all his opinions are "edgy with a hint of real talk, but not real enough to discourage advertisers".  Top 5 Reasons Air is Cancer and Top 5 Reasons Air is Life will be posted back-to-back without a hint of irony.

To be honest, I dunno if the heavy editing thing is as bad as what SA has been doing to get traffic for years on end: have people pay to register and submit funny content (i.e. do your work for you), then take said funny content and plaster the "SOMETHINGAWFUL.COM" logo on it. So when the picture gets reposted nobody will know who did it - but they'll know to visit Something Awful dot com! And everyone rolled with it because they were just contributing to the hilarious SA hivemind while filling Lowtax's pockets with extra chair money.

The heavy editing comes from David being deceptive about the nature of the sandbox.  It's put together to look like you submit articles and then the articles get accepted and put on the front page when really it's a research panel for the editor's sake (with the added bonus of a few funny jokes)  The thing is, most of the rough drafts end up funnier than the actual articles because the sandbox writers don't have to worry about offending advertisers.  The editors are given fine working mules and they reduce them to glue, then they put the glue in the microwave for a few minutes until it's nice and lukewarm.  The only columnist that's actually funny and holds real opinions is Seanbaby, and surprise surprise he's one of the few that's not an editor.

why does this faggot have a fake gook name is it white guilt?

His pseudonym is from his book about a cool kickass Asian who does drugs and has adventures with his best friend when in reality he's a pasty, 40-something Jewboy who telecommutes from Illinois.  The CRACKED offices are in Santa Monica.  He's that boring.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Internet Catchphrase on December 26, 2013, 11:55:46 PM
why does this faggot have a fake gook name is it white guilt?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 27, 2013, 12:06:07 AM
I dunno if he'd admit it NOW but in the past Wong said that he's only voted republican for a pretty long time.

I really liked his writing on pointlesswasteoftime.com (as in, his old website before Cracked.com even existed) and I'm pretty sure he only became this way in recent years. He still has some traces of realtalk left in him, like when he called out DocEvil's shitty Trayvon tweets, but he's certainly taken one too many steps towards populist tumblrshit territory.

It's really weird, even in recent years his writing has shifted back and forth between 'women are practically enslaved by men in the western world' to HTFU bootstraps-type advice (aimed at everyone). It's like he sometimes does Tumblr stuff to clear his name and appeal to the modern internet more.

He also seems like a colossal douchebag on Neogaf. Every post I've read by him has been some holier-than-thou epic burn.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on December 27, 2013, 02:42:24 PM
Next up I'll tackle Christina H and John Cheese and why their bullshit is ruining the website.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OSI on December 27, 2013, 02:56:06 PM
Wait did you have anything about Wong chucking his publisher the minute he got some press?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Trump is the New Norma on December 27, 2013, 10:51:58 PM


Today, on the internet, you get more hits by criticizing shit. Not surprised by any of this.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on December 28, 2013, 03:20:00 PM
i wanna titty fuck katie willert so bad and shoot hot jizz all over her glasses and big nose
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on December 28, 2013, 04:08:51 PM
888 Warning!

Doing some research...

In light of an article posted about the Google Bus kerfluffle, the article mentioned that pandering to social justice warriors is one of the easiest way to gain clicks and that sites like Gawker thrive on it.  Which validates my earlier theory that Cracked is going full SJW to stay relevant since "8 ways to cornhole your frat buddy" is getting ignored by their previous userbase, probably because they stopped coming up with funny or interesting listicles.

With the uptick of SJW bullshit, I had to wonder if cracked.com saw a drop in click traffic beforehand.  Sure enough it did:

(http://i.imgur.com/XSkMnsF.png)

If you notice, when the SJW articles started to get pinched out, in 2012, the site saw a noticeable decrease in click traffic.  However it didn't really stop the decrease.  At December 2013, cracked is about 46% of their peak.

Now, for lols, let's look at Cracked vs. Something Awful:

(http://i.imgur.com/o9sdQsw.png)

Both of them have something in common: they are sites on an irreversible decline.  Even going SJW isn't saving them.  Let's look at how they are doing vs. Gawker:

(http://i.imgur.com/BLCUb4P.png)

Most of those peaks are due to controversies because Gawker is a terrible site.  However they seem to be the only one of the three that is succeeding with their business model.  More people are searching for Gawker than SA and Cracked in spite of all three sites using similar strategies of griping about rich people and exposing bigotry on the internet.

My thought is that the reason why this is is because nobody fucking goes to SA or Cracked to hear about social justice warrior bullshit.  However Gawker was always created with that in mind: a bunch of queens handflapping over the latest indiscretion.  That is their bread and butter.  SA arguably was a site to look at photoshops and to laugh if your sense of humor sucked.  Cracked was a site to look at dumb list articles for males in college to say "Wow, I didn't know that!" before switching over to look at sports scores on ESPN.  Neither of their userbases went there to fight the patriarchy.  As you can see, going SJW isn't helping them.  In fact, a convincing case can be made that going SJW is hastening their decline, even though Gawker is growing employing that strategy.

So why go full poz?  It seems to me that going that direction permanently fucks you over.  SA, Cracked, and other similar sites already lost their former core audience by talking about how white males are so bad because they give feels to the 15-20 strong black genderqueer community on Tumblr.  If they depoz themselves, they will lose their scant amount of SJW audience and end up with nothing.  Since their new audience is so sensitive, the only plan is to double down because SJWs want internet blood to be spilled and someone, somewhere out there, a white cis male is happy with his situation in life.  So they step it up and they are locked in to the death spiral.  Cracked will never have anything that will appeal to men who aren't ashamed of being born with a penis from this point on.  In other words, get used to more "5 incredibly sexist things Winston Rountree found while walking down a sidewalk."
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 29, 2013, 11:13:12 AM
they specifically got sjw article "6 Sexist Video Game Problems Even Bigger Than the Breasts" from a few months ago up on the front page again. not even gonna link it as it is obvious lazy clickbait, but he complains about Tera Online being sexist and objectifying women in the first line; we're talking about a game where the men look like this. http://i.imgur.com/sW04r9H.jpg
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on December 29, 2013, 11:24:33 AM
Reminds me of the original wiscon thread, when all the fat chicks were spamming the thread with drawings of animu men who were built like fight club brad pitt, while saying things like "Maybe this sexiness will calm you all down!"

Then it backfired when we pointed out that they were doing that despite insisting that their fatness was beautiful and whatnot.

"Posting pictures on a forum can be tricky".

Goddamn I love that thread.

http://web.archive.org/web/20080923231127/http://sass.buttes.org/forum/viewtopic.php?id=19144
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on January 03, 2014, 10:14:00 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-sad-ways-ae-became-walmart-television-networks/

lmao a whole article just going :ultlibrage: at A&E for not kowtowing with SJWs and choosing to be an enterprise for profit and not justice~

yeah fuck cracked forever "How dare they exploit this tragedy to make more money!! (please click many times on this article so we get more ad revenue from that controversy tia)"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on January 05, 2014, 08:51:45 PM
Next up I'll tackle Christina H and John Cheese and why their bullshit is ruining the website.

still waiting
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Gas Chamber of Commerce on January 05, 2014, 11:00:52 PM
Goddamn I love that thread.

http://web.archive.org/web/20080923231127/http://sass.buttes.org/forum/viewtopic.php?id=19144

this is pure gold
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on January 05, 2014, 11:36:47 PM
going on six years later and this sig picture still makes me laugh every time I see it

(http://web.archive.org/web/20120711130053/http://i.buttes.org/index.php/http:/img57.imageshack.us/img57/3112/hdifwisiguw5.jpg)

 i can hear it
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: bolonium on January 06, 2014, 08:12:53 AM
going on six years later and this sig picture still makes me laugh every time I see it

(http://web.archive.org/web/20120711130053/http://i.buttes.org/index.php/http:/img57.imageshack.us/img57/3112/hdifwisiguw5.jpg)

 i can hear it


Fuuuk I forgot how long ago SASS was :stare:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on January 06, 2014, 10:49:30 PM
I just looked up WisCon to see if they're still having them

Quote from: Wiscon 2014 Rules
Waiting in Line is Often Optional.

The Dessert Salon and SignOut both have definite start times. Some people enjoy chatting in long lines before such events, but these lines are entirely optional. The Dessert Salon Buffet is replenished throughout the event, and SignOut lasts for 90 minutes.

The more things change, the more they stay the same :allears:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on January 07, 2014, 12:58:31 PM
What I love about memories of WisCon was that there was even a thread in LF mocking them at the time. That was early in the LF days before it become a Marxist-only shithole.

Now of course any mockery would be drowned by strident SJW screeching.

Remember that Typhoon blogger who was going to hunt down SASSers and call their bosses?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on January 07, 2014, 05:28:21 PM
I just looked up WisCon to see if they're still having them

Quote from: Wiscon 2014 Rules
Waiting in Line is Often Optional.

The Dessert Salon and SignOut both have definite start times. Some people enjoy chatting in long lines before such events, but these lines are entirely optional. The Dessert Salon Buffet is replenished throughout the event, and SignOut lasts for 90 minutes.

The more things change, the more they stay the same :allears:

Is cholera still on the menu?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on January 07, 2014, 05:42:30 PM
BTW cracked is still letting us know George Zimmerman is GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY (because he painted a picture)

Quote
#2. An "Original" Painting by George Zimmerman -- $100,099

Under no condition is shooting an unarmed teenager an opportunity to sparkle in the limelight, which is why most people would have assumed George Zimmerman couldn't be more eager to slink into obscurity following his not guilty verdict. Instead, he did a photo op at a fucking gun factory, joined Twitter, and made this:

abcnews.go.com
Great, he can add art to the list of things he's killed.

That is an honest to goodness eBay auction of George Zimmerman art -- bought for $100,000 after a soul-crushing 96 bids. That is, someone willingly paid a small fortune to own a painting made by a guy who is only famous for shooting a kid, which, as far as reasons to press "reset" on this long, sad game of SimCity we call our society go, is a pretty solid one.

But hey, perhaps people just know good, original, and totally-not-a-stock-photo-no-sir art when they see it.


Read more: http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/4-pieces-celebrity-memorabilia-sold-to-insane-rich-people/#ixzz2pksllQuu
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OSI on January 07, 2014, 07:00:05 PM
"Typhoon" aka K. Tempest Bradford aka 100% Nigger is one of the leading lights of sci-fi/fantasy writing.  Not because of anything worthwhile she's written, but because she embodies the SJW party line of Tor Books/SFWA.

The future is a fat nigger eating chocolate in front of your face - forever.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on January 07, 2014, 08:12:34 PM
Is cholera still on the menu?

(http://i.imgur.com/KSrRAan.jpg)

 :lilal:  Looks like it
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on January 07, 2014, 09:40:13 PM
"Typhoon" aka K. Tempest Bradford aka 100% Nigger is one of the leading lights of sci-fi/fantasy writing.  Not because of anything worthwhile she's written, but because she embodies the SJW party line of Tor Books/SFWA.

The future is a fat nigger eating chocolate in front of your face - forever.

Yeah, I looked her up on ED and tracked back to her blog after mentioning her. She's still at it, all these years later.

I had forgotten the 100% Nigger meltdown.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on January 09, 2014, 07:29:00 PM
how fucking convenient

http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/fat-officially-incurable-according-to-science/
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on January 09, 2014, 07:31:45 PM
Quote
"Well, just stop eating so much!" Sure, kid. To feel what it's like, try this: Go, say, just 72 hours without eating anything. See how long it is until the starvation mechanism kicks in and the brain starts hammering you with food urges with such machine gun frequency that it is basically impossible to resist. That's what life is like for a formerly fat person all the time. Their starvation switch is permanently on. And they're not going 72 hours, they're trying to go the rest of their lives. Don't take my word for it. Here's a breakdown of the science, in plain English. It's like being an addict where the withdrawal symptoms last for decades.

when I slimmed down I couldn't eat a donut without feeling bloated only a few months after I started hitting the gym and changed my diet. what the fuck is this shit?

this just in: kicking heroin is easier than losing weight.  :rpno:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on January 09, 2014, 07:39:07 PM
Next up I'll tackle Christina H and John Cheese and why their bullshit is ruining the website.

still waiting
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on January 09, 2014, 09:54:43 PM
Quote
So the guy or girl you see in the "Before" and "After" photos in weight loss commercials, who completely changed body type with diet and exercise? You know, like Jared from Subway, who lost 230 pounds? Either they're about to be fat again in a couple of years, or they're a medical freak occurrence, like the sick guy who was told he had six months to live but miraculously survives 20 years.


This is concentrated goon mentality right here. Even if the 'science' was accurate, the sentiment is "yeah, you could enjoy a couple of years of being in good shape, healthier, and feeling better about your body while being more attractive to others. But you'd just gain it all back, so why even bother?"

People that are so lazy they actually rationalize away happiness are the best reason to make suicide booths a reality. David Wong, even your byline is fat.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on January 09, 2014, 11:23:41 PM
"Statistically, 90% of people who lose lots of weight gain it back pretty quickly, so..."

 non-goon -> "... I'll have to try real hard to be the 10%  :clint:"

 goon -> "... what's the point of even trying :parsons:"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on January 09, 2014, 11:56:55 PM
But try and turn it around on them and see how far that goes...

 :lolno:  why bother unlocking all your Steam achievements, you're just going to die in a few decades anyways

 :unparsons: you see, video games allow a person to experience the satisfaction of achieving something and
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: fuc awf on January 10, 2014, 12:48:32 AM
You guys read books? Nerds.  :bronson:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on January 10, 2014, 06:32:00 AM
I did the "lose a lot of weight and then put it back on and then some" thing. At the start of 12th grade I was 300lbs on the dot. By summer after graduation I was down to about 240.

I'm currently at 320ish (Fluctuates between like 318 and 323) and down 40 or so from my highest weight. It's me, I'm the statistic.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on January 10, 2014, 06:54:50 AM
i managed to shed forty pounds over one summer in russia after struggling with being a rather husky kid through middle and high school
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on January 10, 2014, 07:20:00 AM
I did the "lose a lot of weight and then put it back on and then some" thing. At the start of 12th grade I was 300lbs on the dot. By summer after graduation I was down to about 240.

I'm currently at 320ish (Fluctuates between like 318 and 323) and down 40 or so from my highest weight. It's me, I'm the statistic.

jesus christ youre a fat fuck
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on January 10, 2014, 08:02:31 AM
I did the "lose a lot of weight and then put it back on and then some" thing. At the start of 12th grade I was 300lbs on the dot. By summer after graduation I was down to about 240.

I'm currently at 320ish (Fluctuates between like 318 and 323) and down 40 or so from my highest weight. It's me, I'm the statistic.

jesus christ youre a fat fuck

Oh fuck why didn't anyone tell me this is the first I've heard!!!!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: High Impact Sexbot 2020 on January 10, 2014, 08:33:23 AM
Change Aran's name to David Wong's Proof of Concept tia
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on January 10, 2014, 09:40:15 AM
Who's David Wong?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: High Impact Sexbot 2020 on January 10, 2014, 10:07:08 AM
Who's David Wong?

Oh sorry, you must have just randomly wandered into the thread to announce how fat you are. My mistake.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on January 10, 2014, 10:57:49 AM
Who's David Wong?

Oh sorry, you must have just randomly wandered into the thread to announce how fat you are. My mistake.

Who are you?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: [SWOLE]Grode Jar on January 10, 2014, 11:38:45 AM
Reminds me of the original wiscon thread, when all the fat chicks were spamming the thread with drawings of animu men who were built like fight club brad pitt, while saying things like "Maybe this sexiness will calm you all down!"

Then it backfired when we pointed out that they were doing that despite insisting that their fatness was beautiful and whatnot.

"Posting pictures on a forum can be tricky".

Goddamn I love that thread.

http://web.archive.org/web/20080923231127/http://sass.buttes.org/forum/viewtopic.php?id=19144

Good god almighty troons and "xhe" existed in 2008.  :stare:  I now understand why radfems hate all of those people and hate SJWs as much as us.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: [L.N.E]Giblets on January 10, 2014, 12:57:34 PM
i managed to shed forty pounds over one summer in russia after struggling with being a rather husky kid through middle and high school

See my being fat, social anxiety, living at home and constant E/N posting isn't the same as those fucking goons...
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Hollywood Shabat Goy Yaro on January 10, 2014, 01:13:46 PM
Thanks David Wong for pointing out that my weight loss will be for naught, even though I've managed to stay committed to it for three years and I have no signs of stopping. :reagan:
 
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on January 10, 2014, 01:27:31 PM
Quote
So the guy or girl you see in the "Before" and "After" photos in weight loss commercials, who completely changed body type with diet and exercise? You know, like Jared from Subway, who lost 230 pounds? Either they're about to be fat again in a couple of years, or they're a medical freak occurrence, like the sick guy who was told he had six months to live but miraculously survives 20 years.


This is concentrated goon mentality right here. Even if the 'science' was accurate, the sentiment is "yeah, you could enjoy a couple of years of being in good shape, healthier, and feeling better about your body while being more attractive to others. But you'd just gain it all back, so why even bother?"

People that are so lazy they actually rationalize away happiness are the best reason to make suicide booths a reality. David Wong, even your byline is fat.

They're right but for the wrong reason. Those miracle slimdown photos are typically of people who are already exercise junkies who got injured or ill and gained weight, then when they got better worked back down as they would've without taking whatever snake oil the ad is pushing.

In the end the only non-bypass way is to work out and eat right, not to take a miracle pill.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: rape priviledge on January 10, 2014, 01:33:21 PM
They're right but for the wrong reason. Those miracle slimdown photos are typically of people who are already exercise junkies who got injured or ill and gained weight, then when they got better worked back down as they would've without taking whatever snake oil the ad is pushing.


Most of them are fake. This guys's transformation took one hour:
(http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2013/07/25/article-2377489-1AFB7C57000005DC-802_634x458.jpg)

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2377489/How-shots-used-aggressive-marketing-sell-new-diets-fitness-regimes-big-con.html (http://www.anonym.to/?http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2377489/How-shots-used-aggressive-marketing-sell-new-diets-fitness-regimes-big-con.html)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on January 10, 2014, 01:55:48 PM
i managed to shed forty pounds over one summer in russia

:eminem: That was heartless of you, girl. Russian orphanages are horrible places and nobody will adopt a black kid.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on January 10, 2014, 03:38:08 PM
i managed to shed forty pounds over one summer in russia

:eminem: That was heartless of you, girl. Russian orphanages are horrible places and nobody will adopt a black kid.

Yeah, finding a host family was nearly impossible. The first one was wealthy and wanted me for English practice, and the second took me in hesitantly but ended up really liking me in the end but the family suffered major domestic abuse problems.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Diamond Dallas Page on January 11, 2014, 02:47:29 AM
Reminds me of the original wiscon thread, when all the fat chicks were spamming the thread with drawings of animu men who were built like fight club brad pitt, while saying things like "Maybe this sexiness will calm you all down!"

Then it backfired when we pointed out that they were doing that despite insisting that their fatness was beautiful and whatnot.

"Posting pictures on a forum can be tricky".

Goddamn I love that thread.

http://web.archive.org/web/20080923231127/http://sass.buttes.org/forum/viewtopic.php?id=19144

Good god almighty troons and "xhe" existed in 2008.  :stare:  I now understand why radfems hate all of those people and hate SJWs as much as us.

After Obama's election, all of the downtrodden minorities suddenly felt a lot more empowered, and accommodating white people were all too happy to be walked on.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on January 11, 2014, 10:44:43 AM
"Typhoon" aka K. Tempest Bradford aka 100% Honor student is one of the leading lights of sci-fi/fantasy writing.  Not because of anything worthwhile she's written, but because she embodies the SJW party line of Tor Books/SFWA.

The future is a fat honor student eating chocolate in front of your face - forever.

Yeah, I looked her up on ED and tracked back to her blog after mentioning her. She's still at it, all these years later.

I had forgotten the 100% Honor student meltdown.

At the most recent wiscon, she has a no whiteys allowed 100% honor student only special room. I am not kidding.

http://tempest.fluidartist.com/wiscon-36-poc-safer-space/

Quote
I am once again the WisCon concom liaison and organizer for the POC Safer Space. This year I am joined in organizing and fabulousness by Jayme Goh. Huzzah! We will once again be in the Solitaire Room since it affords us an out of the way space with no Gawkers. Last year we had the hotel push the conference room up against the wall which made the space a lot more inviting. I will also ask if more comfy chairs can find a way in there. If any locals are willing to donate comfy chairs, please let me know. Last year we pre-scheduled some break out sessions and alternate panels in the room, but what seemed to work better was spontaneous stuff.I encourage any POC attending WisCon to come to that space if they need to discuss something that went down on a panel, continue a discussion that started at a panel, or if they just need a space to vent and calm down. I actually had some of the most enlightening conversations in that room during after-panel venting and I’m sure that will happen again, However, if anyone wants to pre-schedule something please feel free. I just suspect mostly it will be spontaneous stuff. The one thing I would like to schedule is a post Opening Ceremonies trip to the space so that people know where it is and how it will be set up and how they can use the space. This will come on the heels of the POC dinner earlier that evening. And then, of course, it’s party time. Just as with last year, there will be coffee and tea service in the room throughout the day and a laptop for those who need to check email or Tumblr. Just don’t leave any Tumblr porn on the screen for those of us who are innocent ;)

Any questions, requests, comments, suggestions? Leave them in the comments or ping me via email or on Twitter or Facebook.

Both comments and pings are currently closed

I really think we should do some invasion and poke another chimpout out of her. She fell for every single one back in 2008 and wrote giant 888 screeds about every single troll.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on January 11, 2014, 11:34:14 AM
Placing bets on that laptop getting stolen some point during the day
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: bolonium on January 12, 2014, 12:01:05 AM
She's a racist :umberto:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on January 12, 2014, 12:12:41 AM
So convenient of them to reintroduce segregation and save everyone the trouble.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: kosher nostra on January 12, 2014, 09:44:40 AM
Change Aran's name to David Wong's Proof of Concept tia
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on January 12, 2014, 10:16:30 AM
Quote

Tosh could have turned this around for himself simply by taking another approach. For instance, Tosh cracks a rape joke, audience member says "Rape is never funny," Tosh responds with "Tell that to the circus clown who made me play the slide whistle while he finished on my back."

Is that joke awful? Yes it is, but it isn't as globally offensive as his actual response. In fact, that would have gotten laughs. Uncomfortable ones, and that audience member would still have been pissed at him, but the whole show would have had less of a sex offender vibe than it did.
:facepalm:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-victims-we-have-to-stop-feeling-sorry-for_p2/ #2 here in this old article is pretty good though
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on January 12, 2014, 01:40:10 PM
oh for fuck's sake

http://www.cracked.com/article_20701_5-shockingly-outdated-problems-women-in-military-face.html

Quote
"They still have this mentality of being mighty, dick-swinging warriors," Noble says. "And have the right to rape and pillage." And if you find yourself about to say, "She has a job around a bunch of testosterone-filled alpha males, what does she expect?!?" just stop and listen to what you're saying. Really. Take a moment to evaluate your life.

You read it here, US soldiers are machines governed by two codes off action, raping and pillaging. It's a daily need.

The worst thing is that after feeling the need to say (anonymously) that every soldier is someone who feels its his right to rape and pillage, she continued by stating a study that slightly more than 1 in 10 women in the army report feeling sexual harassment. Of course she goes on to claim that it's because most women don't report it and clearly the numbers are much much higher even if you can't prove it. I mean it's like 10 out of 10 women gets raped repeatedly man. Cause they are alpha baby killing bros.


edit: and today an article about how to make your jokes more pc so people like them better
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-offensive-jokes-that-could-have-easily-been-fixed/
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on January 12, 2014, 01:57:04 PM
Let's even take her claim completely at face value - 15% of the women do indeed get pressured for sexual favors. Fine.

The title of that section is "You're expected to perform sexual favors to get ahead". What definition of the word "expected" includes something that 85% of the population never experiences?  :tuss:

Also, lol at #4-#2 presented as women's issues. Combat gear sucks, doctors are rude, and recruiters are lying bastards, man I've never heard any of those complaints from male soldiers, those filthy pigs are all happy as pigs in mud.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on January 12, 2014, 02:46:08 PM
Is Cracked still keeping up the facade of being a comedy website? These articles are just poorly researched Tumblr talking points.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Kill all goons on January 12, 2014, 04:32:28 PM
I would say no, can't even remember the last time I read a funny article on there.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: sub-base turf sniffing boner diarist on January 12, 2014, 06:54:09 PM
Quote
"They still have this mentality of being mighty, dick-swinging warriors," Noble says. "And have the right to rape and pillage."

Private, what is best in life?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on January 12, 2014, 08:44:36 PM
Quote
And if you find yourself about to say, "She has a job around a bunch of testosterone-filled alpha males, what does she expect?!?" just stop and listen to what you're saying. Really. Take a moment to evaluate your life.

Okay let me take a moment.

...

God DAMN my life is pretty awesome. Thanks, angry internet writer!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on January 12, 2014, 09:24:07 PM
oh for fuck's sake

http://www.cracked.com/article_20701_5-shockingly-outdated-problems-women-in-military-face.html

Quote
"They still have this mentality of being mighty, dick-swinging warriors," Noble says. "And have the right to rape and pillage." And if you find yourself about to say, "She has a job around a bunch of testosterone-filled alpha males, what does she expect?!?" just stop and listen to what you're saying. Really. Take a moment to evaluate your life.

You read it here, US soldiers are machines governed by two codes off action, raping and pillaging. It's a daily need.

The worst thing is that after feeling the need to say (anonymously) that every soldier is someone who feels its his right to rape and pillage, she continued by stating a study that slightly more than 1 in 10 women in the army report feeling sexual harassment. Of course she goes on to claim that it's because most women don't report it and clearly the numbers are much much higher even if you can't prove it. I mean it's like 10 out of 10 women gets raped repeatedly man. Cause they are alpha baby killing bros.


edit: and today an article about how to make your jokes more pc so people like them better
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-offensive-jokes-that-could-have-easily-been-fixed/

its very well known that the us military has a long history of raping and pillaging because of the highly publicized court marshals where soldiers are punished for raping and pillaging
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on January 13, 2014, 08:02:59 PM
its very well known that the us military has a long history of raping and pillaging because of the highly publicized court marshals where soldiers are punished for raping and pillaging

Those are more procedural/technique criticisms than anything, though. Making sure the proper paperwork was filed, procedure done in order, reflective belt worn at all times, etc.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on January 13, 2014, 08:21:20 PM
*Watches "The General's Daughter" on Netflix*

*Sits down to pen half of Cracked article*

*Queues up GI Jane*

*Finishes article*



INTERNET JOURNALISM
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on January 13, 2014, 10:41:20 PM
its very well known that the us military has a long history of raping and pillaging because of the highly publicized court marshals where soldiers are punished for raping and pillaging

Those are more procedural/technique criticisms than anything, though. Making sure the proper paperwork was filed, procedure done in order, reflective belt worn at all times, etc.

sergeant, we have testimony from 5 members of your unit who said you werent wearing a seatbelt at the time you were plowing your 5t truck into a horde of gook refugees. we also have a reliable report that states that when calling in a napalm strike on a gook village full of non-combatants that you were not wearing your helmet or flak armor, what were you thinking sergeant?!?! you could have been hurt!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on January 13, 2014, 11:27:45 PM
its very well known that the us military has a long history of raping and pillaging because of the highly publicized court marshals where soldiers are punished for raping and pillaging

Those are more procedural/technique criticisms than anything, though. Making sure the proper paperwork was filed, procedure done in order, reflective belt worn at all times, etc.

sergeant, we have testimony from 5 members of your unit who said you werent wearing a seatbelt at the time you were plowing your 5t truck into a horde of gook refugees. we also have a reliable report that states that when calling in a napalm strike on a gook village full of non-combatants that you were not wearing your helmet or flak armor, what were you thinking sergeant?!?! you could have been hurt!

Catch-2022
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: freak puke on January 14, 2014, 03:29:57 AM
Took me a while to find it, but here it is, all they way back from 2012 (emphasis mine):

Quote from: David Wong
This is 4chan's number one pasttime. Go there at any random moment and you'll find a link to a Facebook memorial page with "You know what to do, /b/" and hundreds of people suggesting what to spam it with.

Keep that in mind in case you ever meet someone who says they post on 4chan, or don't think it's that bad, or any time you see an interview with Chris Poole (who owns it). This is what 4chan is all about, and they're all supporting it.

Their moderators don't delete or edit or ban for it - it's purely allowed, it's the reason 4chan exists, so people have a place to do things like this.


You heard it here first, folks!  4chan exists for exactly one reason, and literally everyone on the entire website supports it!

See also: http://www.cracked.com/forums/topic/120596/horrible-people-in-this-thread./0


tl'dr the hand-wringing bullshit in the articles was inevitable
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Justice Dredd on January 14, 2014, 08:14:53 AM
its very well known that the us military has a long history of raping and pillaging because of the highly publicized court marshals where soldiers are punished for raping and pillaging

Those are more procedural/technique criticisms than anything, though. Making sure the proper paperwork was filed, procedure done in order, reflective belt worn at all times, etc.

sergeant, we have testimony from 5 members of your unit who said you werent wearing a seatbelt at the time you were plowing your 5t truck into a horde of gook refugees. we also have a reliable report that states that when calling in a napalm strike on a gook village full of non-combatants that you were not wearing your helmet or flak armor, what were you thinking sergeant?!?! you could have been hurt!

this honestly isn't that far off. in iraq, at one of the biggest fobs in the country they had MPs who would pull over your HMMWV for speeding on the fob. someone's entire deployment was going halfway across the world to pull over soldiers driving 40 in a 35.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pretty Sneaky Cis on January 14, 2014, 08:42:26 AM
Quote
I am once again the WisCon concom liaison and organizer for the POC Safer Space. This year I am joined in organizing and fabulousness by Jayme Goh. Huzzah! We will once again be in the Solitaire Room since it affords us an out of the way space with no Gawkers. Last year we had the hotel push the conference room up against the wall which made the space a lot more inviting.

Nice that they took the effort to arrange things in a manner familiar to the inmat-- err... attendees.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on January 14, 2014, 11:19:35 AM
Took me a while to find it, but here it is, all they way back from 2012 (emphasis mine):

Quote from: David Wong
This is 4chan's number one pasttime. Go there at any random moment and you'll find a link to a Facebook memorial page with "You know what to do, /b/" and hundreds of people suggesting what to spam it with.

Keep that in mind in case you ever meet someone who says they post on 4chan, or don't think it's that bad, or any time you see an interview with Chris Poole (who owns it). This is what 4chan is all about, and they're all supporting it.

Their moderators don't delete or edit or ban for it - it's purely allowed, it's the reason 4chan exists, so people have a place to do things like this.


You heard it here first, folks!  4chan exists for exactly one reason, and literally everyone on the entire website supports it!

See also: http://www.cracked.com/forums/topic/120596/horrible-people-in-this-thread./0


tl'dr the hand-wringing bullshit in the articles was inevitable
All this time I thought /cgl/ was a board for autistic women who dress up as anime characters, but I guess it's about posting muddy dicks on Facebook memorial pages after all! :tuss:

This might just be the dumbest thing Wong has ever said. It's also amazingly pathetic given how much he's stressed the whole "don't view things in black and white don't let anyone make you into their pawn blahblah" thing because "let's all rally against this thing that is different from us FOR OUR CHILDREN!!!!!!!! >:'O" is actually a pretty common manipulation method.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: freak puke on January 14, 2014, 01:12:15 PM
But wait, there's more! (http://www.cracked.com/forums/topic/93112/26quot3Bare-you-saying-society-should-just-let-him-die26quot3B-crowd-shouts-26quot3Byes2126quot3B/20)


Thread in a nutshell:


Quote from: Something Rusty
Hold on a second,

"Human suffering is the only thing that matters" is exactly the kind of argument I was talking about.

Maybe I need to back up.  Here's a question I start my Health Economics classes off with:

"Suppose medical technology develops a pill that can keep anyone of any age with any disease or injury healthy, happy, comfortable and active for a month at a time indefinitely.  The real physical resources of time, effort, and materials required to manufacture the pill are such that each pill costs $10,000, even with full competition in all relevant markets.  Should society:

A:  Sacrifice almost all other private and public goods to supply a pill a month to all people who could make use of it.
B:  Provide a limited number of the pills as a social investment, dished out at random or based on some social criteria.   
C:  Allow people who can afford to buy the pill to buy it, and allow those who cannot to suffer and die unless aided by charity.
D: Some combination of B and C
E:  Suppress the discovery and allow no one to have it."

That is simplified, but it is the real situation we face.  We can do incredible things for a few people, but not everyone.  We can decide to restrict access to keep things fair.  We cannot do everything for everyone that diminishes human suffering.  That's not hiding behind spreadsheets, that's facing the facts.  We can be pissed off that expensive things are possible, but it's not defensible to say everything that is possible should be done everywhere.
 
To me, to be serious about this issue, it is necessary to accept human suffering and death.  It's vital to have a stopping rule.  At some point, someone has to be in a position where they can do more, but choose not to. Its unavoidable, no matter what level of public or private provision of health care you want to impose/allow.

 I'm not talking about avoidable pain like withholding morphine to hospice patients.  That's cheap and easy.  And it's perfectly fine, by my lights, for a society to say "We will spend considerable amounts of money to protect people from pain and suffering" and to do so.  But it's a whole different animal to say human suffering is the only thing that matters.

Saying there is no limit to the health care everyone should get is not empathetic, it's a dodge.  Saying rich people should have no more access to health care than poor people is a political position related to justice but not to empathy.

I'm not appealing to justice or free market principles or liberty here when I say some people who could technically be preserved as a medical matter cannot be as an economic matter.


In response:

Quote from: Captain Bravo
Also, and this is just a personal thing, but after the third time people waste effort trying to describe how something like this is sociopathic and perhaps just a tiny bit sadistic, and you immediately jump right back into faux-indignation/damage control/hypothetical miracle pill mode? I'm just as likely to simply say "fuck it" call you a dipshit motherfucker and start deleting your posts. Just a heads-up there, letting you know how some of us are feeling about the whole thing. Airing those impressions. Gettin' all that out there in the open.

Yes, folks, this thread has it all:  righteous indignation, painting with broad strokes, threatening to delete posts for wrongthink, LITERALLY SHAKING and even some stdh.txt!


Quote from: arrace
I don't think there's any way of rationalizing what those crowd members did, whether you try to look at it from an abstract point of view or not. Let me tell you a story about a guy I knew in high school. Basically, he was going overseas to serve in the military after graduation. So one day I'm talking to him about it, and I ask him, "Are you scared at all?" And he says, "A little I guess. But at least I don't have to worry about killing people." And I asked, "What do you mean?" And he responded, "Well I'm just killing Iraqis, they're not really people." I immediately changed the topic and never spoke to the guy again.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on January 14, 2014, 05:35:47 PM
Do you think we should start a subfourm for cracked users?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on January 15, 2014, 08:30:54 AM
well now they've gone full fire

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-movies-that-sent-opposite-their-intended-message/
Quote
#5. The Dark Knight Rises: Anarchy Is Not That Bad

Warner Bros.

The Message:

Like Christopher Nolan's previous Batman movies, The Dark Knight Rises is awash with political commentary. A terrorist leader, Bane, seizes power in Gotham and starts giving speeches that read like a Wikipedia article about Marxism: The people of Gotham should rise up, throw off their chains made of rich people, and take over. The city's authorities are lured underground and trapped, and Batman is forced to watch from his distant prison as anti-capitalist anarchy destroys the city. The message here doesn't have to be spelled out in Mitt Romney bumper stickers: This is what happens when the 99 percent seize power, and it stinks more than the Porta-Potties in the second month of an Occupy Wall Street camp.

Why It Falls Flat:

Because Bane's anarchy-plagued Gotham works better than a lot of American cities.

Oh sure, we get a little montage of wealthy people getting dragged out into the street, and yes, there are some unfair trials going on. But for the average Joe Gothamite on the street? Life seems to be going pretty well. For example, look at these shots we see of Gotham's streets, months after it was taken over by Bane and his band of revolutionary thugs:

Now let's compare those to what a normal city street looks like after 11 days of a garbage strike:

Clearly, someone is collecting Gotham's trash, so we can only assume that there was a deleted scene in which Bane took a break from fist-based murder and held a meeting that detailed an orderly garbage-collecting roster using PowerPoint slides:

The streets are also apparently getting plowed, which is more than Gotham's real-life counterpart can manage when it's not being occupied by evil mercenaries. Sewerage and water are presumably still running, judging by how clean everyone looks and how much typhoid they don't have. The cops trapped underground are being fed, which means that the occupation has a functioning welfare system that extends even to its political enemies. Electricity is common enough for people to talk about watching TV. And all this without anyone paying any taxes. Nolan's depiction of a socialist nightmare actually looks pretty sweet. Maybe Venezuela can learn from the masked sociopath, and prevent all those toilet paper shortages it keeps having.

Yes, Bane did have a bomb that was going to blow up the city. But that just means that Nolan's message ended up being "violent socialist revolutions are alright, provided that no one stumbles on any experimental nuclear weapons."

:tuss:

The fact that you have people who actually think these things, and the fact that tens of thousands if not more agree with him on the basics is terrifying.

edit:

like, if that had been written as a satire of the useful idiots pretending that the USSR wasn't starving and people weren't dying etc... that would have been hilarious and spot on. the sad reality is that those people still exist today.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: [SWOLE]Grode Jar on January 15, 2014, 10:40:45 AM
Honestly I'm fine with idiots believing these things.  They will all be the first to die if the revolution does occur because they have no valuable skills.  Gender studies and history degrees do not make for good comrades. 
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Professor of Niggerology on January 15, 2014, 10:52:31 AM
oh for fuck's sake

http://www.cracked.com/article_20701_5-shockingly-outdated-problems-women-in-military-face.html

Quote
"They still have this mentality of being mighty, dick-swinging warriors," Noble says. "And have the right to rape and pillage." And if you find yourself about to say, "She has a job around a bunch of testosterone-filled alpha males, what does she expect?!?" just stop and listen to what you're saying. Really. Take a moment to evaluate your life.

You read it here, US soldiers are machines governed by two codes off action, raping and pillaging. It's a daily need.

The worst thing is that after feeling the need to say (anonymously) that every soldier is someone who feels its his right to rape and pillage, she continued by stating a study that slightly more than 1 in 10 women in the army report feeling sexual harassment. Of course she goes on to claim that it's because most women don't report it and clearly the numbers are much much higher even if you can't prove it. I mean it's like 10 out of 10 women gets raped repeatedly man. Cause they are alpha baby killing bros.


edit: and today an article about how to make your jokes more pc so people like them better
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-offensive-jokes-that-could-have-easily-been-fixed/
I like how the list includes recruiters lying, as if thats something exclusive to women.

also is there anyway having your boobs crushed by esapi plates could be comfortable?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: dd0sed on January 15, 2014, 11:19:12 AM
I'm surprised nobody brought up this poz fest: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-old-news-stories-media-pretended-were-new-this-year/

On Miley Cyrus:

Quote
#5. The Pop Star Trajectory Is as Old as Pop Stars

For good or bad, for almost as long as women have put themselves on the stage, they've used what the good Lord gave them to get your eyes on their bodies and your ears on their voices. Madonna, Lady Gaga, Christina Aguilera, Debbie Harry, Janet Jackson, Britney, Cher, Tina Turner, and middle-aged Julie Andrews are all part of a long tradition of scintillating while entertaining. Oh, did you miss that part where I said Mary Poppins has performed with her bosoms unswaddled?

I think more than enough has been said about Miley Cyrus, but I think most of the backlash came down to her age, so recently being a Disney teen star, and just how completely bizzare and plain unattractive her routine was. And the Robin Thicke bit was bordering on ephebophilia (not to mention his wife was in the audience), but who are we to judge? Didn't you hear sex and body positivity are really in now?

Quote
So let's make a vow to stop condescending to Miley Cyrus and all the other skankyish pop stars who come after her as victims of predatory management or even worse -- naivete. Clearly, there's some foresight and brilliant planning behind the career of Miley Cyrus. It's time to recognize Miley as a woman who is self-aware and probably on her way to stealing the pop star throne.

Expanding on this kind of thinking, consider this from an article on Miley Cyrus by the lesbian porn producer  Jincey Lumpkin (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jincey-lumpkin/why-miley-cyrus-is-a-feminist-icon_b_4078373.html) (and from Huffpo no less):

Quote
How dare I? Aren't I worried about the legion of 12-year-olds who will also feel compelled to writhe around in little to no clothing? No, I am not worried. In fact, I think we need to stop freaking out about sexuality. We are all sexual people. Babies masturbate in the womb. We pop out from Mama full of sexual instincts. Get real, parents: Children are sexual creatures.

"Children are sexual creatures"... isn't that the rhetoric pedophiles usually employ?

But of course, we have to remember that any opposition to this amounts to wanting to burn women at the stakes:

Quote
I think that what brought on the good ol' American ire was not Miley's nakedness but rather her "fuck you" attitude in combination with an expression of sexuality. She was channeling Marky Mark and Michael Jackson and their crotch-grabbing ways. And we know what happens to women who defiantly appropriate male sexual behavior: They are burned at the stake.

Stop the witch hunt. Acknowledge that female sexuality is loud, proud and here to stay.

I bet it won't be long before we see a Cracked article with a title something like "5 Reasons Why it's Insane to Deny Children Are Sexual Beings" and how "pedosexuality" is a legitimate orientation, and how there's a number of emotionally mature, high IQ children out there that should give us pause as to why we shouldn't be so concerned about age of consent laws or 40 year olds hooking up with 14 year olds anymore.

But back to the article- #4 is the horrors of white people using the nigger word:

Quote
You don't have to look back far to find white celebrities using racial slurs. Whether it's Dr. Laura, Roger Ebert, Mel Gibson, Michael Richards, or Riley Cooper, every single instance draws anger and shock BECAUSE WE ALREADY WENT OVER THIS. For every white person defending their right to use the N-word, there are thousands and thousands of white people wondering where these idiots come from and how they always end up with cameras in their faces. White people see frequent N-word user Quentin Tarantino as the Michael Scott of Hollywood: clueless, embarrassing, and inappropriate, but somehow good at sales.

As lame as this section is, I'm really surprised it didn't go on about how since cracker, honkey etc. don't carry the baggage nigger does, white people shouldn't care at all about having racial slurs thrown against them, especially since racism is prejudice + power and racism against white people simply doesn't exist, so spare us your white tears.

Quote
#3. Our Government Has Always Been Up in Our Business

Long story short (too late!), three different whistle-blowers alerted us about the NSA's insanity before Edward Snowden. The difference between those guys and Snowden was that Snowden went straight to the press, bypassing all the internal mechanisms that got the other three shut down faster than a brothel during period week.

This whole sections amounts to "Pfft, what's the big deal? The government has ALWAYS been looking into our private business!" This isn't the first time Cracked has thrown around this sniveling, castrated response to what amounts to hands down the most extensive, breathtaking invasion of personal privacy in human history (and constantly lying about it) that not only affects american citizens, but those of our allies without their knowledge, giving information on our citizens to Israel, verified abuse of personal information on the part of NSA employees etc. etc. It's also besides the point that others spoke of these activities years ago- we had no idea just how extensive it was until Snowden. I'm not really sure what motivates this kind of reaction to things like the NSA- is it just some kind of forced cynicism or tacit Obama worship? It's not exactly poz, but regardless, it's fucking pathetic and something Cracked has gone for on multiple occassions.

#2 is pretty unremarkable in that it amounts to "Why make a big deal over the Toronto mayor? We've always had shitty people who rule over us!", but it can probably be taken as an extension of #3.

And #1 ("Humanity Is (Always) Going in the Right Direction") is of course the absolute most insufferable, pozzed part of the entire article, a breathtaking elucidation of SJW thought, and opening with what might be one of the most embarrassing, cringe-inducing lines in Cracked history:

Quote
In a world where George Zimmerman is out there pulling his gat on whoever looks at him funny and Trayvon Martin isn't a living person anymore, it's only natural to get caught up in the worst the world has to offer.

Yeah... because when I think of what's wrong with the world, I think of Trayvon Martin being gone.  :tuss:

After bemoaning the loss of Trayvon Martin Luther King (who certainly wasn't a violent, burglaring, lean abusing delinquent who, despite falling through the cracks of his school's police and was either on his way to prison or the grave by another "youth") at the hands of George "Hitler Reincarnated" Zimmerman and the latter's eternal rampage, we're on to a tour de force of modern liberal thinking about how progress and time are perfectly correlated and the good always win out over the bigots:

Quote
This year, a single man refocused the entire mission of one of history's most influential institutions. A Pakistani teenage girl was recognized for her constant fight to educate Muslim girls, even after getting shot in the head for her advocacy. And the Supreme Court struck down the section of the Defense of Marriage Act that prevents gay married couples from getting federal benefits. So, to recap: The future of two of the world's most conservative religions are in progressive hands, and the United States government is tired of fighting gays for their constitutional rights. Are you excited? Good. Should you be surprised? No.

2 of those 3 are all about the wonders of gay equality, and the first of course is likely viewed by Cracked and such not as a victory for basic human decency, but apart of the tapestry of modern feminist insanity.

Quote
History always punishes conservatives, not because conservatives are bad or wrong, but because they are, by definition, stuck. If you're standing still while the world is moving, you're going to get left behind.

Now remember, the word "conservative" isn't just a political term. If you want something to stay the same, whether we're talking about your religion, your music choices, or your hairline, you're conservative in that respect. Civilizations that turn inward and reject progress fall behind every time. Before Europe even figured out how boats work, China was already navigating their way to the Middle East and Africa. They should have been the ones who colonized the world -- except around the year 1500, the Chinese decided "we're good here" and ceased all exploration to the outside world. While European powers were clamoring all over each other to discover/take over different parts of the globe, China officially banned all sea travel. By the time European countries got their sights on China a few hundred years later, the technology gap was too wide to cross. Europe won.

The exact same thing happened in Japan. Beginning in 1633, Japan went into isolation mode: no one could come in and no one could leave. Two hundred years later, England had the firepower and technology to force their way in to get access to that delicious Japanese trade money. In both cases, both cultures started out ahead, then shut in on themselves for whatever reason, therefore missing every opportunity to see new things, experiment, and improve on others' ideas, or move forward in any way. They were conservative. And they got stuck.

See, conservativism is just about preserving things for no reason other than being apart of "tradition". There's no value to be gained from any sort of institutions that have been tied around the basic family unit that have existed throughout human history- guess what else has been apart of traditional societies? Racism, slavery, misogyny, homophobia, and TRANSPHOBIA! It has nothing to do whatsoever with seeing new things, experimenting and improving on others' ideas, which are best viewed as seeing gays and trannies as perfectly healthy in every way and just like "cishets", rotten, mentally imbalanced whores like Miley Cyrus as admirable, and upholding white (or "white hispanic", if you prefer) racism as the worst sin in the world and deifying people like Trayvon Martin. But it doesn't stop there:

Quote
So don't be surprised if the next generation of Christian conservative leadership is a lot less conservative than you'd expect, or if the Tea Party slowly fades away in the next few election cycles, or our grandkids never quite understand what the big deal with gay marriage was.

And don't be surprised if we have demiromantic pansexual multiple systems neutros transabled femmeboi otherkins serving in major positions of power, and how anyone who thinks such people are in any way abnormal are monsters. The "slippery slope" may technically be a fallacy, but it's perfectly applicable here, since modern liberalism essentially revolves around "if it's not hurting you then WHAT'S THE PROBLEM, BIGOT???", which has been best defined as "harm based morality" , seeing morality and social interaction as little more than nebulous concepts of preventing "harm" and upholding "consent". There's absolutely no real moral foundation to it, and it's the exact opposite of a social fabric with an actual one, other than "privilege checking." And that's why we're nowadays, if anyone's heard of that "Nash Grier" hysteria, also seeing general outrage over the idea of women having to shave their body hair (including armpits), which used to be limited to insane campus feminists and is now a basic talking point over some stupid teenage boys talking about what they want in a girl. And let's not even get started on how the fat positivity movement has also included seeing stretch marks as beautiful.

You know, it doesn't really surprise me that Cracked got this bad. I never really read Cracked until a few years ago, and it was little more than a timesink, because beyond the basic information presented, the site was goony as fuck even then. The writing and humor are absolutely atrocious and genuinely painful to read at times, and it seems like it's always been that way, though I never really read PWOT. Nerds are by nature more sympathetic to this kind of shit, so it comes as little surprise Cracked has been finding itself on the SJW bandwagon, but it's still no less souring when articles like this are prime evidence of how this shit is everywhere now. I should also add, there's still plenty of people in the comments of this article criticizing it, especially #1, but they're fighting something they won't be able to win against at this point.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on January 15, 2014, 11:23:39 AM
well now they've gone full fire

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-movies-that-sent-opposite-their-intended-message/
Quote
#5. The Dark Knight Rises: Anarchy Is Not That Bad

Warner Bros.

The Message:

Like Christopher Nolan's previous Batman movies, The Dark Knight Rises is awash with political commentary. A terrorist leader, Bane, seizes power in Gotham and starts giving speeches that read like a Wikipedia article about Marxism: The people of Gotham should rise up, throw off their chains made of rich people, and take over. The city's authorities are lured underground and trapped, and Batman is forced to watch from his distant prison as anti-capitalist anarchy destroys the city. The message here doesn't have to be spelled out in Mitt Romney bumper stickers: This is what happens when the 99 percent seize power, and it stinks more than the Porta-Potties in the second month of an Occupy Wall Street camp.

Why It Falls Flat:

Because Bane's anarchy-plagued Gotham works better than a lot of American cities.

Oh sure, we get a little montage of wealthy people getting dragged out into the street, and yes, there are some unfair trials going on. But for the average Joe Gothamite on the street? Life seems to be going pretty well. For example, look at these shots we see of Gotham's streets, months after it was taken over by Bane and his band of revolutionary thugs:

Now let's compare those to what a normal city street looks like after 11 days of a garbage strike:

Clearly, someone is collecting Gotham's trash, so we can only assume that there was a deleted scene in which Bane took a break from fist-based murder and held a meeting that detailed an orderly garbage-collecting roster using PowerPoint slides:

The streets are also apparently getting plowed, which is more than Gotham's real-life counterpart can manage when it's not being occupied by evil mercenaries. Sewerage and water are presumably still running, judging by how clean everyone looks and how much typhoid they don't have. The cops trapped underground are being fed, which means that the occupation has a functioning welfare system that extends even to its political enemies. Electricity is common enough for people to talk about watching TV. And all this without anyone paying any taxes. Nolan's depiction of a socialist nightmare actually looks pretty sweet. Maybe Venezuela can learn from the masked sociopath, and prevent all those toilet paper shortages it keeps having.

Yes, Bane did have a bomb that was going to blow up the city. But that just means that Nolan's message ended up being "violent socialist revolutions are alright, provided that no one stumbles on any experimental nuclear weapons."

you read this wrong, he's not saying all this stuff is awesome, he's saying Nolan failed to accurately depict what happens when government shuts down
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: rape priviledge on January 15, 2014, 12:19:25 PM
When a feminist reads a text, she will interpret everything to be a product of the patriarchy and sexual oppression. When a Marxist reads the same text, he'll interpret it as some sort of class warfare and inequality. A person's analysis of a text/film says more about the analyzer than about the media.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on January 15, 2014, 08:30:27 PM
Next up I'll tackle Christina H and John Cheese and why their bullshit is ruining the website.

still waiting

Yeah sorry about that, the holidays rolled around and I had other priorities.

I've tried writing this two or thee times, but I can't make this as big of an effort post as the others.  People like Christina and John are endemic of all comedy sites.  You have to evolve to survive, and CRACKED invested in a type of humor (wacky cat women talking about the fuckin' MAN, maaaan and reformed drug addicts who are better than you (despite the fact that John lives in abject poverty and has zero interpersonal skills and is only famous because he attached himself to someone funnier than him)) that their established fan base simply doesn't care for.  CRACKED readers want interesting lists and fun facts, not some dumb idiot's blog.  I can't speak for the future of CRACKED, but I hope it sways more toward Wikipedia's front page on April Fool's: true facts presented in a way that, although correct, is intentionally misleading.

I can't find the videos, but John Cheese did a series of YouTube videos called Broke Ass Cooking.  They were ridiculously pathetic.  If I can find some I'll post them here.  Suffice it to say, he is not a cool drug man.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on January 17, 2014, 03:29:40 PM
women soldiers are so funny. hey i want to be a professional murderer and welfare zombie. wtf why are you raping me what an injustice
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on January 17, 2014, 05:13:30 PM
women soldiers are so funny. hey i want to be a professional murderer and welfare zombie. wtf why are you raping me what an injustice

This would be a brilliant thing to post in D&D. Watch the "all soldiers are evil kitten murderers" and "rape is the worst thing in the history of the world" crowd tear each other apart.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on January 17, 2014, 05:45:43 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7Ea5P3W1qU

this???
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: High Impact Sexbot 2020 on January 17, 2014, 08:43:25 PM
women soldiers are so funny. hey i want to be a professional murderer and welfare zombie. wtf why are you raping me what an injustice

This would be a brilliant thing to post in D&D. Watch the "all soldiers are evil kitten murderers" and "rape is the worst thing in the history of the world" crowd tear each other apart.

You assume their principles aren't as fluid as their gender.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on January 17, 2014, 09:43:50 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7Ea5P3W1qU

this???

Yeah, there used to be a lot more, but it looks like he deleted them all.  The original ones were just him talking to a tripod in an even dirtier kitchen.  No fast forwarding or jump cuts or nothing, he expected people to sit through a 45 minute long steak cooking.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on January 17, 2014, 11:59:44 PM
you read this wrong, he's not saying all this stuff is awesome, he's saying Nolan failed to accurately depict what happens when government shuts down

I still find it actually somewhat intriguing that Chris Nolan is still so revered with Goons/SJWs after TDKR. Goons were writing walls of text about how it was fascist propaganda in that it (supposedly) portrayed police officers as the heroes and poor people as the enemy. Also, remember back when TDK came out goons were saying that the Joker was the ultimate badass messiah against capitalism/wall street because he told that nigger he doesn't care about money more than the message or some shit?

Goons. :tuss:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on January 18, 2014, 12:06:43 AM
The Nolan Batman films are pretty left leaning.  Batman Begins had several moments where they kept stressing that the reason why poor people committed crime was because of the evil corporations and poverty so it totally wasn't their fault.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: As a white male I on January 18, 2014, 06:54:55 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7Ea5P3W1qU

this???

Goddamn that's awful. It looks like something shot by a teenager on a camcorder in the late 90's.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: VFW on January 18, 2014, 09:25:03 AM
Excellent write-up dd0sed

I only read cracked for seanbaby anyway.  :colbert:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on January 19, 2014, 10:28:18 AM
Excellent write-up dd0sed

I only read cracked for seanbaby anyway.  :colbert:

Didn't he quit or something?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on January 19, 2014, 11:53:31 AM
seanbaby has his own website why wouldn't you just read him there?

 :jesse:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Tranny Feet on January 20, 2014, 12:52:04 AM
The most annoying fucking thing about Cracked and its forums is John Dies At The End and John Dies At The End and also John Dies At The End. Hey, did you know David Wong, the guy who wrote John Dies At The End wrote a book called John Dies At The End? Plus, John Dies At The End.

I think I lasted about an hour pottering about on their forums a few years back out of curiousity before the constant mentions of this shit that I had to go look up (it's a book, apparently) started to grate. I mean, you don't see Stephen King crowbarring in unsolicited references to The Shining to anyone within earshot while he's talking to the checkout girl  bagging his groceries and he had the excuse of being absolutely fucking melted out of his face on hard liquor and drugs when his output was earning millions and being Oscar nominated so I couldn't understand why the fuck these clowns kept going on and on about "JDatE" like it was up there with The Bible in terms of influence. Do the mental arithmetic and you quickly realise there are a finite number of books you can read in your lifetime and there's no fucking way I'm pissing time away on anything that began as an "internet novel". Check his fucking Twitter handle. What a tit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on January 21, 2014, 10:19:28 AM
the three new articles on cracked today are about depression, feminism, and being a beta.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on January 21, 2014, 10:40:43 AM
Has anyone here been watching the Daily Show? Is it me or it became extremely pc, ultra-SJW and preachy in the last few years? I hadn't watched a single episode in like 6 years and well the two episodes I selected at random (last friday and in the summer) were like this:

last week:
opened on a 7 minutes segment about feminism at work, where a woman pretended to be the patriarchy and loving how great it is to be a rich white fat cat
continued with a segment about gay marriage in utah where he literally popped champaign to celebrate
finished on a 8 minute interview about the importance of healthcare

I mean what in the fuck is that shit?

And worse, the episode from last summer happened to be in the middle of the Paula Deen thing and they had some random black girl come on the stage and scream about racism and how slavery was bad and I mean no jokes just actual yelling about racism

What the fuck? This used to be a show about making fun of the news, not pontificating.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on January 21, 2014, 10:42:14 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-ways-were-programmed-to-think-women-arent-funny/?wa_user1=3&wa_user2=Weird+World&wa_user3=blog&wa_user4=feature_module

"women are socially conditioned to be shit at humor, but men are bigots and you should FUCKING SEVER if they say women aren't funny"

is she even listening to herself
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: VFW on January 21, 2014, 10:50:27 AM
I only find Aisha Tyler and Sarah Silverman funny (all ss cred drops to negative infinity) but mostly women comics are ranting about periods, cramps or how slutty they are.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on January 21, 2014, 11:42:14 AM
male comics talk constantly about their dicks, farts, and how they like porn so content really isn't why lady comics arent funny. lady comics aren't funny because women aren't funny. they don't know how to structure or deliver a joke and they can't be self-deprecating except about I LIKE DICKS LOL which really isn't self-deprecating at all
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on January 21, 2014, 01:09:07 PM
Has anyone here been watching the Daily Show? Is it me or it became extremely pc, ultra-SJW and preachy in the last few years? I hadn't watched a single episode in like 6 years and well the two episodes I selected at random (last friday and in the summer) were like this:

last week:
opened on a 7 minutes segment about feminism at work, where a woman pretended to be the patriarchy and loving how great it is to be a rich white fat cat
continued with a segment about gay marriage in utah where he literally popped champaign to celebrate
finished on a 8 minute interview about the importance of healthcare

I mean what in the fuck is that shit?

And worse, the episode from last summer happened to be in the middle of the Paula Deen thing and they had some random black girl come on the stage and scream about racism and how slavery was bad and I mean no jokes just actual yelling about racism

What the fuck? This used to be a show about making fun of the news, not pontificating.
its been that way for awhile. and when someone in the media calls him out on it he just retreats into the 'its all jokes' he should just own it one way or another
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Justice Dredd on January 21, 2014, 01:52:10 PM
Has anyone here been watching the Daily Show? Is it me or it became extremely pc, ultra-SJW and preachy in the last few years? I hadn't watched a single episode in like 6 years and well the two episodes I selected at random (last friday and in the summer) were like this:

last week:
opened on a 7 minutes segment about feminism at work, where a woman pretended to be the patriarchy and loving how great it is to be a rich white fat cat
continued with a segment about gay marriage in utah where he literally popped champaign to celebrate
finished on a 8 minute interview about the importance of healthcare

I mean what in the fuck is that shit?

And worse, the episode from last summer happened to be in the middle of the Paula Deen thing and they had some random black girl come on the stage and scream about racism and how slavery was bad and I mean no jokes just actual yelling about racism

What the fuck? This used to be a show about making fun of the news, not pontificating.
its been that way for awhile. and when someone in the media calls him out on it he just retreats into the 'its all jokes' he should just own it one way or another

the show follows the same formula. take what a republican said out of context and make it into a strawman, do whatever a democrat says and turn it into a martyrdom. here's the shit about lisa browns being BANNED FOR DARING TO SAY 'VAGINA' on the senate floor
http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/mon-june-18-2012/the-vagina-idealogues---michigan-lawmaker-banned-from-speaking (http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/mon-june-18-2012/the-vagina-idealogues---michigan-lawmaker-banned-from-speaking)

nevermind that it was because she yelled "I'm flattered that you're all so interested in my vagina, but no means no." clearly the RETHUGLIKKANS weren't at all upset about the insinuation that they were obsessed with her vagina and trotting out 'no means no' like they were out to rape her, the inappropriateness of the comment and how if they accused the women of the senate floor of being interested in their penises it would be sexism, no it was simply because she used the word 'vagina' and those stuffy old white men can't bear to hear that word at all.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on January 21, 2014, 02:48:13 PM
there a few female comedians that i've found legit funny but sarah silverman is not one of them
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on January 21, 2014, 03:39:19 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-ways-were-programmed-to-think-women-arent-funny/?wa_user1=3&wa_user2=Weird+World&wa_user3=blog&wa_user4=feature_module

"women are socially conditioned to be shit at humor, but men are bigots and you should FUCKING SEVER if they say women aren't funny"

is she even listening to herself

Yeah I didn't even click on that trash because I knew that's what it was going to be.  Thanks for confirming it, though.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Sum Beezy on January 21, 2014, 04:44:35 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-ways-were-programmed-to-think-women-arent-funny/?wa_user1=3&wa_user2=Weird+World&wa_user3=blog&wa_user4=feature_module

"women are socially conditioned to be shit at humor, but men are bigots and you should FUCKING SEVER if they say women aren't funny"

is she even listening to herself

She seriously went "you'd think this article was funny if I were a man!" :christina:

I genuinely thought it was a man writing this entire article until she mentioned it, it was still horribly unfunny. Just really sarcastic preaching.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on January 21, 2014, 05:23:35 PM
 :myecred:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on January 21, 2014, 05:33:55 PM
Has anyone here been watching the Daily Show? Is it me or it became extremely pc, ultra-SJW and preachy in the last few years? I hadn't watched a single episode in like 6 years and well the two episodes I selected at random (last friday and in the summer) were like this:

last week:
opened on a 7 minutes segment about feminism at work, where a woman pretended to be the patriarchy and loving how great it is to be a rich white fat cat
continued with a segment about gay marriage in utah where he literally popped champaign to celebrate
finished on a 8 minute interview about the importance of healthcare

I mean what in the fuck is that shit?

And worse, the episode from last summer happened to be in the middle of the Paula Deen thing and they had some random black girl come on the stage and scream about racism and how slavery was bad and I mean no jokes just actual yelling about racism

What the fuck? This used to be a show about making fun of the news, not pontificating.

I remember in 2008 when Obama was elected and people were saying "uh oh, the Daily Show is now going to be the most conservative show out there" because they assumed Jon Stewart would skewer Obama as much as he did Bush.  Little did they realize that he would just end up retreating further to the left.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on January 21, 2014, 06:07:48 PM
the daily show criticizes obama and the democrats a lot actually, for not standing up standing up to those crazy evil republicans
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on January 21, 2014, 08:21:34 PM
the Daily Show used to be really funny as a satire where they dug up random weird shit in middle America and interviewed strange people who had no idea they were doing something weird/being laughed at

...and now I feel old as balls because that was over a decade ago. Christ.

Ah well, at least they've got a mass audience now with their new formula: John Stewart does high-pitched voice or stereotypical New Jersey accent to deliver some sarcastic commentary about Congress, followed by an interview where he fellates whatever retard is in the studio

I can think of maybe one person he's interviewed in the last ten years where he hasn't gone HOW DO YOU DO THE THING YOU DO, IT'S AMAZING HOW YOU ARE ABLE TO DO IT, IT'S REALLY INCREDIBLE
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SSOUL TRANN on January 21, 2014, 08:38:47 PM
I only find Aisha Tyler and Sarah Silverman funny (all ss cred drops to negative infinity) but mostly women comics are ranting about periods, cramps or how slutty they are.

I did some big effortpost on this a few months back, but yeah, this is the problem with most comedians who are women/black/gay/muslim/X group. They can ONLY see the world through the eyes of that group.

Every single female or black comic I worked with on the road did exclusively material about being a woman or being black. Whats worse, is they couched, IN THE MATERIAL, direct accusations to the audience that if you DON'T laugh at the upcoming punchline you are a bigot. They were incapable of just having a funny thought or observation that was ubiquitous or universal.

The best comics from these groups can straddle the line. Eddie Murphy had plenty of bits about being black, but he had bits about being a kid and shitting in the tub, or music, or family, that everyone could love. Hannibal Buress is a brilliant young black comic just getting big now who is a great jokewriter who does material everyone can relate to.

I also really like Sarah Silverman as a jokewriter. I've heard plenty of jokes she's written and thought "man, wish I thought of that". But then, this is why she's been a marquee headliner since her 20's.

This is why at this point in my career I very rarely take bookings at comedy clubs, because I have to work with other comedians, and I have no idea if they are going to take a shit onstage and give me a hole to dig out of. I like bars and private/corporate events where I work ALOOOONE. And when I DO feel like going out to see comedy myself, if I even see a woman or I'M A BLACK MAN black guy or whatever on the poster, I don't bother going. Burned too many times.

:effort:
Tell us a joke.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on January 21, 2014, 09:58:33 PM
Craig Kilborn was hilarious. I adored the Daily Show as a teenager who thought she was totally informed and was runnin' shit. Even during my "liberal" teenage days I thought he was insufferable, especially because I prefer the Colbert Report and Colbert himself as a comedian (I STILL adore the man). Back when Colbert did the Rally to Restore Fear and Stewart took it over for his preachy liberal shit I was really annoyed. Even being a pretty moderate person, enough was just enough. Then there are the people who watch Stewart and replace him for their actual source of news. It's awful.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: New Feminist Jihad on January 21, 2014, 10:38:27 PM
Maybe this deserves another thread, but my beginning of the end with regards to the Daily Show was during the Trayvon trial because I couldn't stand their idiotic, dogmatic "coverage" of it.
I've only watched the show since 2008 but ever since about 2010, it really became a farce. It's just liberal tv at this point.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: High Impact Sexbot 2020 on January 21, 2014, 11:05:01 PM
Sarah Silverman funny (all ss cred drops to negative infinity)

(all ss cred drops to negative infinity)

(all ss cred drops to negative infinity)

(all ss cred drops to negative infinity)

SARAH SILVERMAN

FUNNY


(all ss cred drops to negative infinity)

:polonium:

SARAH SILVERMAN FUNNY

:polonium:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: armchair nazi on January 21, 2014, 11:41:42 PM
Craig Kilborn was hilarious. I adored the Daily Show as a teenager who thought she was totally informed and was runnin' shit. Even during my "liberal" teenage days I thought he was insufferable, especially because I prefer the Colbert Report and Colbert himself as a comedian (I STILL adore the man). Back when Colbert did the Rally to Restore Fear and Stewart took it over for his preachy liberal shit I was really annoyed. Even being a pretty moderate person, enough was just enough. Then there are the people who watch Stewart and replace him for their actual source of news. It's awful.
craig kilborn is the fucking man and should be way more popular and famous than he is.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Diamond Dallas Page on January 21, 2014, 11:55:40 PM
Has anyone here been watching the Daily Show? Is it me or it became extremely pc, ultra-SJW and preachy in the last few years? I hadn't watched a single episode in like 6 years and well the two episodes I selected at random (last friday and in the summer) were like this:

last week:
opened on a 7 minutes segment about feminism at work, where a woman pretended to be the patriarchy and loving how great it is to be a rich white fat cat
continued with a segment about gay marriage in utah where he literally popped champaign to celebrate
finished on a 8 minute interview about the importance of healthcare

I mean what in the fuck is that shit?

And worse, the episode from last summer happened to be in the middle of the Paula Deen thing and they had some random black girl come on the stage and scream about racism and how slavery was bad and I mean no jokes just actual yelling about racism

What the fuck? This used to be a show about making fun of the news, not pontificating.

A lot of the people who proudly bragged about getting all their news from Jon Stewart during Bush's first term are the same ones who now use minorities as shields and bludgeons against normal people, and their friends that just shrugged it off are the ones that quietly let them get away with it now.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on January 22, 2014, 12:39:38 AM
Has anyone here been watching the Daily Show? Is it me or it became extremely pc, ultra-SJW and preachy in the last few years? I hadn't watched a single episode in like 6 years and well the two episodes I selected at random (last friday and in the summer) were like this:

last week:
opened on a 7 minutes segment about feminism at work, where a woman pretended to be the patriarchy and loving how great it is to be a rich white fat cat
continued with a segment about gay marriage in utah where he literally popped champaign to celebrate
finished on a 8 minute interview about the importance of healthcare

I mean what in the fuck is that shit?

And worse, the episode from last summer happened to be in the middle of the Paula Deen thing and they had some random black girl come on the stage and scream about racism and how slavery was bad and I mean no jokes just actual yelling about racism

What the fuck? This used to be a show about making fun of the news, not pontificating.

Going to have to disagree with you on this part. Stewart has always been light on criticizing the American Left especially on issues pertaining to Social Justice from their point of view. Once he realized in 2008 that he could make a fucking FORTUNE by calling anyone opposing Obama a bigot/racist on his comedy platform he cashed in, and it's paid off well for him; he makes about 35 million a year now. Thats way more than Bill O'Reilly & any late night talk show host like Leno, Letterman, etc. Like ClemenSalad said, once anybody calls Stewart out on his shit he just resorts back to the incredibly tired "I'm a satirist" argument. He won't even fucking acknowledge the fact that he probably influences more people to vote Democrat than any other person in the Media does. I could care more or less about Stewart, and he can be funny sometimes when he's not sucking the cock of the SJW agenda. Also I agree with Bill Maher on how stupid that rally was  that Stewart & Colbert did.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: angryoldman on January 22, 2014, 01:44:40 AM


Ah well, at least they've got a mass audience now with their new formula: John Stewart does high-pitched voice or stereotypical New Jersey accent to deliver some sarcastic commentary about Congress, followed by an interview where he fellates whatever retard is in the studio

I can think of maybe one person he's interviewed in the last ten years where he hasn't gone HOW DO YOU DO THE THING YOU DO, IT'S AMAZING HOW YOU ARE ABLE TO DO IT, IT'S REALLY INCREDIBLE

Watching John "evil torture memo" Yoo rope a dope Stewart was glorious.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: angryoldman on January 22, 2014, 01:47:07 AM
Like ClemenSalad said, once anybody calls Stewart out on his shit he just resorts back to the incredibly tired "I'm a satirist" argument. He won't even fucking acknowledge the fact that he probably influences more people to vote Democrat than any other person in the Media does. I could care more or less about Stewart, and he can be funny sometimes when he's not sucking the cock of the SJW agenda. Also I agree with Bill Maher on how stupid that rally was  that Stewart & Colbert did.
Yeah, the "clown nose on, clown nose off" bit is pretty pathetic, as is his attempts to never address that issue.

That fucking rally. All you need to know is that they had Yusuf Islam there. If they had any balls they would have asked him if he still thinks Salman Rushdie should be murdered.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on January 22, 2014, 12:27:16 PM
 :adam:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on January 22, 2014, 03:58:17 PM
Tell us a joke.

Every time god closes a door, he opens a window. Then Eric Clapton writes a real sad song about it.

i felt bad laughing at this
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on January 22, 2014, 04:08:49 PM
Also Stewart is calling the games in Russia this year the homophobic olympics  :ultlibrage:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Jack Ruby on January 22, 2014, 08:27:43 PM
Jon Stewart sucks and was never funny. He was the only unfunny thing in Half Baked.

Anyway, I think this is kind of emblematic of how relatively pozzed David Wong has gotten. John Dies at the End went through three published editions: The CafePress one he did himself, the Permuted Press edition, and finally the big time real publisher one. I have the first and third of them (because whatever Cracked has turned into, JDATE is fucking great).

At one point, our narrator and his companions are in Vegas, and they spot Elton John's gaudy tour bus. Here's what the original edition says:

"Behind it was an 18-wheeler, painted white with neon outlines, some kind of logo airbrushed on the side. [Unfunny crybaby alcoholic John] asked, 'I wonder what's in there.'
Big Jim said, 'Shipment of fags.'
This seemed to anger Molly..."

Five years of internet social justice later, here's how it reads now:

""Behind it was an 18-wheeler, painted white with neon outlines, some kind of logo airbrushed on the side. [Hillbilly Warcraft-addict divorcee John] asked, 'I wonder what's in there.'
Big Jim said, 'Shipment of fags.'
The asshole's a comedian all of a sudden.
This seemed to anger Molly..."

The italics are in the original, indicating the narrator talking to himself.

So what happened here is that David Wong wrote a pretty funny joke that contained the fag word. When it came time to re-edit his novel five years later, he was pozzed enough that he felt the need to add a disclaimer.

"I mean, I wrote the joke, but that's certainly not something I'd ever say, and I want you all to know how much less I think of Jim Sullivan, a fictional character of my own making, for saying something so awful."

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on January 23, 2014, 12:02:16 AM
Jon Stewart sucks and was never funny. He was the only unfunny thing in Half Baked.

Anyway, I think this is kind of emblematic of how relatively pozzed David Wong has gotten. John Dies at the End went through three published editions: The CafePress one he did himself, the Permuted Press edition, and finally the big time real publisher one. I have the first and third of them (because whatever Cracked has turned into, JDATE is fucking great).

At one point, our narrator and his companions are in Vegas, and they spot Elton John's gaudy tour bus. Here's what the original edition says:

"Behind it was an 18-wheeler, painted white with neon outlines, some kind of logo airbrushed on the side. [Unfunny crybaby alcoholic John] asked, 'I wonder what's in there.'
Big Jim said, 'Shipment of fags.'
This seemed to anger Molly..."

Five years of internet social justice later, here's how it reads now:

""Behind it was an 18-wheeler, painted white with neon outlines, some kind of logo airbrushed on the side. [Hillbilly Warcraft-addict divorcee John] asked, 'I wonder what's in there.'
Big Jim said, 'Shipment of fags.'
The asshole's a comedian all of a sudden.
This seemed to anger Molly..."

The italics are in the original, indicating the narrator talking to himself.

So what happened here is that David Wong wrote a pretty funny joke that contained the fag word. When it came time to re-edit his novel five years later, he was pozzed enough that he felt the need to add a disclaimer.

"I mean, I wrote the joke, but that's certainly not something I'd ever say, and I want you all to know how much less I think of Jim Sullivan, a fictional character of my own making, for saying something so awful."
a friend says the book originally had a "black people are loud in movie theaters" part and is asking if he removed it
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on January 23, 2014, 12:46:04 AM
When in reality, its a seeing a shitty horror movie is a predominantly black patronized theater is incredible.  I am as white as fuck, but by the end of the movie I'm yelling for people not to go in there. A fucking experience that cannot be replicated at home.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SSOUL TRANN on January 23, 2014, 03:14:00 AM
Tell us a joke.

Every time god closes a door, he opens a window. Then Eric Clapton writes a real sad song about it.
Nice  :stewart:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on January 23, 2014, 03:53:35 AM
When in reality, its a seeing a shitty horror movie is a predominantly black patronized theater is incredible.  I am as white as fuck, but by the end of the movie I'm yelling for people not to go in there. A fucking experience that cannot be replicated at home.

I saw Django Unchained while visiting my aunt in Mississippi, my fucking god you could barely hear the movie.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on January 23, 2014, 08:37:05 AM
Turns out that John Cheese is also a massive sperg who's afraid of social interaction as well
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-tips-awkward-people-looking-to-make-new-friends/

That's how he opens it
Quote
Meeting new people sucks. Well, at least it does for people like us -- people who would rather eat a bar of soap than endure the awkward juggling of social rules and misreading of body language that comes with human contact. Confident, practiced people will tell you it's as easy as walking up to a stranger and saying hello, but it's not that simple for us. We don't have their charisma or their gift of being able to blow off the throbbing sting of rejection. For us, that throb is always there. And for once, I'm not talking about genitals. Mostly.

Unfortunately, we're programmed to be social creatures, and biology will eventually nag us until we break and fill the void with whatever poor bastard we trick into being our emotional caulk. The problem is: How? How the hell do you find them, let alone know what to say when you do? Well, there are a few basic things "normal" people know that we don't. For instance ...

and it's filled with gems like that:

Quote
Personally, I don't like to go outside of my house unless it's on fire ... and even then, I weigh my motion versus the likelihood of my doom. I'm perfectly content to sit in front of the computer from the time I wake up until the time I go to bed, working, watching TV shows, playing games. It's all done on my computer. Most of my friends are the same exact way, and that's why the majority of my friends are all online. The fact that we choose to communicate without physically being in the same room doesn't make our friendships any less real or powerful.

Hahaha I have to say it's a p hilarious read but not why they intended it to be
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: High Impact Sexbot 2020 on January 23, 2014, 08:42:53 AM
I tried scanreading it and I had an 888 poz malfunction.  :depressedlesbian:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on January 23, 2014, 10:16:44 AM
When in reality, its a seeing a shitty horror movie is a predominantly black patronized theater is incredible.  I am as white as fuck, but by the end of the movie I'm yelling for people not to go in there. A fucking experience that cannot be replicated at home.
It's great for shitty movies too. It's the only way I was able to enjoy Constantine.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Kill all goons on January 23, 2014, 10:29:29 AM
Turns out that John Cheese is also a massive sperg who's afraid of social interaction as well
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-tips-awkward-people-looking-to-make-new-friends/

That's how he opens it
Quote
Meeting new people sucks. Well, at least it does for people like us -- people who would rather eat a bar of soap than endure the awkward juggling of social rules and misreading of body language that comes with human contact. Confident, practiced people will tell you it's as easy as walking up to a stranger and saying hello, but it's not that simple for us. We don't have their charisma or their gift of being able to blow off the throbbing sting of rejection. For us, that throb is always there. And for once, I'm not talking about genitals. Mostly.

Unfortunately, we're programmed to be social creatures, and biology will eventually nag us until we break and fill the void with whatever poor bastard we trick into being our emotional caulk. The problem is: How? How the hell do you find them, let alone know what to say when you do? Well, there are a few basic things "normal" people know that we don't. For instance ...

and it's filled with gems like that:

Quote
Personally, I don't like to go outside of my house unless it's on fire ... and even then, I weigh my motion versus the likelihood of my doom. I'm perfectly content to sit in front of the computer from the time I wake up until the time I go to bed, working, watching TV shows, playing games. It's all done on my computer. Most of my friends are the same exact way, and that's why the majority of my friends are all online. The fact that we choose to communicate without physically being in the same room doesn't make our friendships any less real or powerful.

Hahaha I have to say it's a p hilarious read but not why they intended it to be

This really puts his all of his "life advice" articles on Cracked in a new light. This guy is the last person who should be giving advice to people on how to live.

Also:

Quote
For us, that throb is always there. And for once, I'm not talking about genitals. Mostly.

Seriously this is the most unfunniest shit right here. Dick jokes is basically his go to route in every goddamn article. He thinks this is funny. You can actually play a little game, go read all of his articles (or better yet don't) and try to find at least one that doesn't contain a stupid, retarded dick joke for no reason whatsoever.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Tranny Feet on January 23, 2014, 05:09:07 PM
It's weird how these developmentally disabled manchildren understand perfectly the concept of using a particular skill over and over again to level-up in pretty much every RPG ever but can't seem to get their heads around the same principle being valid in real life. You don't learn how to talk to people by sitting in your room the same way you can't learn how to ride a bike by lying on your back and pedaling your legs.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: dd0sed on January 23, 2014, 06:45:48 PM
Martin Luther King day was just a few days ago, so it's worth mentioning Cracked openly discussed MLK's plagiarism nearly 5 years ago (http://www.cracked.com/article_17198_5-great-men-who-built-their-careers-plagiarism.html), and ended off with this:

Quote
Did He Pay?

Not during his lifetime. To be fair, it takes balls to accuse the greatest civil rights activist in history with plagiarism. Now, if you'll excuse us, we're all going to go hide in an undisclosed cave with a bunch of loaded guns, and enough crystal meth to keep us awake all year.

Should probably add "scrubbing this section from memory" soon enough.

On another note, David Wong regularly posts on Twitter, and he's gotten a fair amount of flak over there for the SJW direction Cracked his taken- in this case, his crusade for fat positivity: http://www.reddit.com/r/bestof/comments/1uss4z/lila_vanilla_shares_her_experience_of_assisting/celclda?context=3

Quote
lastpageblues 69 points 14 days ago

Just wanted to make sure that the Cracked readership felt at home. All we need now is John Cheese writing some common sense article about life and then pretend like he just said something profound.

Quote
COBatman 54 points 14 days ago

WTF happened to Cracked? It used to be funny, but it's become "5 Reasons you're a racist misogynist pig because you watched Star Wars in the 80s". Shut the fuck up with the self righteous preaching. No one wants to hear a "comedy" writer, and I use that term very loosely, preaching condescendingly towards them. Fuck you.

Quote
ArchangelleGestapo 28 points 13 days ago

    I assume everyone there is 13 but sometimes I wonder.

The linked thread is full of comments from medical residents.. They must all be Doogie Howsers!

Well, good for you, not letting facts get in the way of your feelings. You reason like a true SJW. I understand why our local SJW club looks up to you. They get you.

Quote
LikeASirBaws 26 points 14 days ago

If this is the David Wong from Cracked...

    Loved John Dies at the End

    Cracked seems to have gotten really Social Justicey lately. Is there any particular reason why the content on the site seems to have taken a more overt turn in regards to social critique?

Quote
the_liebestod 27 points 14 days ago

It seems like the natural answer to 2 is that a lot of the staffers are SJWs. If Wong is any indication. I'm kinda surprised that someone uses a professionally-identifying account to engage in straight-up SRS-style posting. Especially when they work at a humor site. But hey, it's Cracked.

His post has a score of -159 and dozens of people ripping into him, and Wong, of course, doesn't respond.

And here's Dan O'Brien, a lead writer, cozying up with SRS: (http://www.reddit.com/r/SRSMeta/comments/1msitg/when_did_we_get_crackedcom_in_our_back_pockets/)

Quote
There hasn't really been a concerted effort to change or point us toward any specific direction, no. We write about what's on our minds and what we think our audience will respond to.

On the PUA send up article, I just wanted to talk about feminism, which is important to me, in a way that didn't feel like I was brow beating anyone or trying to make men feel like monsters just for being born men. It's easy to end up sounding preachy or accusatory, and I wanted to cover these issues which, if our forum is any indication, mean a lot to our readers in a way that wasn't super soap-boxy. I was probably half successful, but I liked trying.

The sexism in video games article, man, I love that piece as much as you folks. Much better than anything I could have come up with. Glad you enjoyed the site this week, and I'm sorry in advance if you hate it next week.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on January 23, 2014, 06:58:46 PM
Turns out that John Cheese is also a massive sperg who's afraid of social interaction as well
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-tips-awkward-people-looking-to-make-new-friends/

That's how he opens it
Quote
Meeting new people sucks. Well, at least it does for people like us -- people who would rather eat a bar of soap than endure the awkward juggling of social rules and misreading of body language that comes with human contact. Confident, practiced people will tell you it's as easy as walking up to a stranger and saying hello, but it's not that simple for us. We don't have their charisma or their gift of being able to blow off the throbbing sting of rejection. For us, that throb is always there. And for once, I'm not talking about genitals. Mostly.

Unfortunately, we're programmed to be social creatures, and biology will eventually nag us until we break and fill the void with whatever poor bastard we trick into being our emotional caulk. The problem is: How? How the hell do you find them, let alone know what to say when you do? Well, there are a few basic things "normal" people know that we don't. For instance ...

and it's filled with gems like that:

Quote
Personally, I don't like to go outside of my house unless it's on fire ... and even then, I weigh my motion versus the likelihood of my doom. I'm perfectly content to sit in front of the computer from the time I wake up until the time I go to bed, working, watching TV shows, playing games. It's all done on my computer. Most of my friends are the same exact way, and that's why the majority of my friends are all online. The fact that we choose to communicate without physically being in the same room doesn't make our friendships any less real or powerful.

Hahaha I have to say it's a p hilarious read but not why they intended it to be


Note the massive contradiction between "why yes my internet friends are just as meaningful as real-life ones" and, well, the entire rest of the article.

Which one is it, John Cheese? Are you a comfortable introvert who exchanges a couple of emails per day and is otherwise happy to do his own thing, or are you frantically trying to make at least a couple of acquaintances so someone will wish you a merry Christmas in 2014?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on January 24, 2014, 02:58:33 PM
Guys!  We in the west are totes wrong!  Living in Iran is extra-awesome!

http://www.cracked.com/article_20855_5-ways-life-in-iran-nothing-like-you-think.html

 :lolno:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on January 24, 2014, 03:48:19 PM
I think all you really need to look is look at how many Iranian people try to come to the U.S. than look at how that stacks up against the opposite.

 :madgoon: But AMERIKKA!! :madgoon:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on January 24, 2014, 09:56:04 PM
I think all you really need to look is look at how many Iranian people try to come to the U.S. than look at how that stacks up against the opposite.

 :madgoon: But AMERIKKA!! :madgoon:

Christopher Hitchens responds to some dumb fucking Iranian girl claiming women have rights in Iran:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXjm31Bvomo

Note how see says "but my hair might have to be covered only a little bit in Iran".  :facepalm:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on January 26, 2014, 02:43:29 PM
Read more: http://www.cracked.com/article_20935_help21-were-losing-all-our-writers-to-fame-fortune.html#ixzz2rXFfWi35

"Help! We're Losing All Our Writers to Fame and Fortune." I think Wong finally chased off all the good writers from cracked.


Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Jack Ruby on January 26, 2014, 03:16:03 PM
Read more: http://www.cracked.com/article_20935_help21-were-losing-all-our-writers-to-fame-fortune.html#ixzz2rXFfWi35

"Help! We're Losing All Our Writers to Fame and Fortune." I think Wong finally chased off all the good writers from cracked.

Seanbaby's posted three straight pieces on Break.com (whatever that is), so it looks like Wong's already gotten rid of the only one worth reading.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on January 27, 2014, 01:13:51 AM
Guys!  We in the west are totes wrong!  Living in Iran is extra-awesome!

http://www.cracked.com/article_20855_5-ways-life-in-iran-nothing-like-you-think.html

 :lolno:


#1 on that list is "Their Holidays Kick Ass" and...

Quote
...Oh -- and did I mention how many people are dressed as Blackface Santa? Sure, the character's face is supposed to be covered in soot, but no amount of cultural understanding can prepare you for your first sight of children boarding a midnight bus looking like they're on their way to a minstrel show.


(http://i.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/article/6/6/3/235663.jpg)

You might think, "Wow, Muslim festivals are pretty badass,"...

 :ultlibrage: BIGOTRY ALERT!!  :ultlibrage:


How many of these hand-wringing faggots pop up every Christmastime to tell us Black Peter is an example of how the Dutch are a bunch of loathsome racists?

(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a7/Zwartepiet.png)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Fade to Vanilla on January 27, 2014, 08:25:19 PM
 :librage: : non-white culture is the only one worth preserving!

 :clint: : ok, what about when two non-white cultures conflict like the hutus against the tutsis?

 :ultlibrage: : IMPERIALIST FASCIST EXPLOITER

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on January 28, 2014, 08:11:21 AM
today on cracked: why telling people they can be less fat by eating less and exercising more is unscientific and a dick move
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on January 28, 2014, 01:42:56 PM
"I guess some people just can't handle having ample food supplies and alot of free time" is the lesson we're meant to take away here.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on January 29, 2014, 09:04:58 AM
How can you two bring this up and not even mention the worst part of it:

Quote
I'm sure I've said this to people many times over the years, along with all of the other terrible advice on this list. So if I could go back in time, I'd tell Past David, and anyone else offering this condescending, dismissive, wet shart of an attempt at advice, to please grasp something:

The fat people you make fun of and condescend to probably have more willpower than you do.

That's because (and you would know this, Past David, if you were capable of pulling your head out of your own asshole long enough to grasp the idea that the universe contains beings who aren't exactly like you), in order to just stay at their weight, even if it's 300 pounds over the healthy level, they have to successfully resist the urge to eat more often than you do. Mocking them for having more fat on their body is like mocking an MMA fighter for having more bruises than you. You're not stronger, you're just living a different life.

:myecred2:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BrownBlow on January 30, 2014, 01:13:38 AM
Read more: http://www.cracked.com/article_20935_help21-were-losing-all-our-writers-to-fame-fortune.html#ixzz2rXFfWi35

"Help! We're Losing All Our Writers to Fame and Fortune." I think Wong finally chased off all the good writers from cracked.

$50 for a week of research and writing with no assurance your own words will get published isn't enough to keep talented writers on staff?

What?

What?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on January 30, 2014, 07:42:47 AM
Maybe that explains the surge of SJW bullshit: they lost their good writers and the only writers (read: dumbasses) willing to work for free are SJWs who just want another outlet for their soapboxes.  I guess you do get what you pay for.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on January 30, 2014, 11:23:09 AM
Maybe that explains the surge of SJW bullshit: they lost their good writers and the only writers (read: dumbasses) willing to work for free are SJWs who just want another outlet for their soapboxes.  I guess you do get what you pay for.
They probably all left because Wong chased them off.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Jack Ruby on February 02, 2014, 09:04:40 PM
From an otherwise innocuous/forgettable article about presidents (http://www.cracked.com/article_20913_5-presidents-who-were-total-badasses-in-their-youth.html):

Quote
To give you an example, he was so committed to his poker games that he turned down an invitation to have dinner with Charles Lindbergh when the famous hero pilot/racist stopped by the island because it overlapped with one of his nightly money-winning contests.

Yeah, that's the important thing about Charles Lindbergh, you faggot shut-in. I bet he didn't bother to learn your pronouns while he was making aviation history and flying combat missions in the Pacific.

How dare a man born in 1902 not CHECK HIS PRIVILEGE?! :ultlibrage:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on February 02, 2014, 10:20:40 PM
To be fair, I expected Obama to be on that list and was pleasantly surprised to see that he wasn't there.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on February 02, 2014, 11:37:21 PM
its like that joke about the guy who did all those amazing things but he gets called a dicksucker because "you suck one dick..."

"i tell you, you can be the first man to fly across the atlantic without stopping, you can fly 50 combat missions in ww2 and do some amazing shit, but you say nigger once..."
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on February 04, 2014, 12:56:28 AM
I remember when the Daily Show was actually funny - the last thing I specifically remember that made me laugh like a lunatic was a report on some kind of carbonated, flavored milk. After the report, John pulled out a pouch of it from behind the desk and said something like "Oh, come on. How bad could it be?" and then took a drink while something ominous like O Fortuna blared in the background before a look of slowly dawning horror crept across his disgusted face.

Then I remember that that was back in, like, 2000. The show went off a cliff fast during the Bush years and I haven't watched an episode since sometime around 2009.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on February 04, 2014, 10:15:28 PM
Oh boy, gang!

:888:

Oh boy! (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-relationship-zones-worse-than-the-friend-zone/)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: High Impact Sexbot 2020 on February 04, 2014, 10:19:51 PM
Oh boy, gang!

:888:

Oh boy! (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-relationship-zones-worse-than-the-friend-zone/)

Faggot Irredeemable.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Shelarahn on February 04, 2014, 11:22:57 PM
The articles with the cutesy tumblr SJW comics are the fucking worst. What happened to Crack making dick jokes in every article

Also them trying to hawk their jew "dispensary" every page is awful
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on February 05, 2014, 04:03:14 AM
Quote
Surprise, bitches! This is what the actual friend zone is! Also sorry for saying "bitches," I know using that term like that is sexist. I just really like the comedic shock value of the phrase "Surprise, bitches!" Do you think it would work as a T-shirt? I'm getting off topic.

J.F. Sargent needs to be put down like a sick dog.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on February 05, 2014, 11:39:33 AM
the problem with the internet today is that if you remember the internet 10-15 years ago - which sounds like i'm talking about the 17th century - the majority of the comedy on the internet revolved around making fun of crazy fuckups on the internet, where making fun of a fat person's webpage was good clean fun everybody could get behind. unfortunately the crazy incompetent fucked up people grew in number and endured and outlasted, and now the lunatics run the asylum
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on February 05, 2014, 08:03:55 PM
This piece of poz appeared on my facebook feed today:

6 Awesome Theories That Totally Change Famous Characters

With an innocuous title like that, maybe it'll be alright, right? I'll just copy-paste the individual items and save you part of the disgust:

Quote from: some faggot
#6. Heath Ledger's Joker Was Probably a Soldier
#5. Jack Sparrow Became a Pirate Because He Refused to Haul Slaves
#4. Nala Was Almost Raped by Scar (yes, from the fucking Lion King)
#3. Spock Is a Descendant of Sherlock Holmes
#2. Kirk Is a Space-Holocaust Survivor
#1. Optimus Prime Is the Six Million Dollar Robot


Even when they're sperging about pop culture, these faggots need to inject social justice. It's "awesome" to imagine there's a rape subtext in a children's cartoon? This is the urgoon right here. Literally unable to bear their shitty movie heroes being anything other than hand-wringing moralistic faggots.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on February 05, 2014, 09:07:56 PM
Even when they're sperging about pop culture, these faggots need to inject social justice. It's "awesome" to imagine there's a rape subtext in a children's cartoon? This is the urgoon right here. Literally unable to bear their shitty movie heroes being anything other than hand-wringing moralistic faggots.

i read the article (oops) and it looks like none of these are "theories" as they were pretty explicitly stated within the works themselves

#6. Heath Ledger's Joker Was Probably a Soldier (possibility raised in an official companion book)
#5. Jack Sparrow Became a Pirate Because He Refused to Haul Slaves (deleted scene from the movie)
#4. Nala Was Almost Raped by Scar (song cut from the movie but present in the broadway musical)
#3. Spock Is a Descendant of Sherlock Holmes (heavily implied in Star Trek VI and not the first time Sherlock Holmes has been linked to other fictional characters (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wold_Newton_family))
#2. Kirk Is a Space-Holocaust Survivor (explicitly stated in one episode)
#1. Optimus Prime Is the Six Million Dollar Robot (explicitly stated in one episode)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on February 05, 2014, 10:17:08 PM
Even when they're sperging about pop culture, these faggots need to inject social justice. It's "awesome" to imagine there's a rape subtext in a children's cartoon? This is the urgoon right here. Literally unable to bear their shitty movie heroes being anything other than hand-wringing moralistic faggots.

i read the article (oops) and it looks like none of these are "theories" as they were pretty explicitly stated within the works themselves

#6. Heath Ledger's Joker Was Probably a Soldier (possibility raised in an official companion book)
#5. Jack Sparrow Became a Pirate Because He Refused to Haul Slaves (deleted scene from the movie)
#4. Nala Was Almost Raped by Scar (song cut from the movie but present in the broadway musical)
#3. Spock Is a Descendant of Sherlock Holmes (heavily implied in Star Trek VI and not the first time Sherlock Holmes has been linked to other fictional characters (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wold_Newton_family))
#2. Kirk Is a Space-Holocaust Survivor (explicitly stated in one episode)
#1. Optimus Prime Is the Six Million Dollar Robot (explicitly stated in one episode)

 :indians: <-- this has nothing to do with tuss's aspergers, but lol
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on February 06, 2014, 03:17:06 AM
How can you two bring this up and not even mention the worst part of it:

Quote
The fat people you make fun of and condescend to probably have more willpower than you do.

That's because (and you would know this, Past David, if you were capable of pulling your head out of your own asshole long enough to grasp the idea that the universe contains beings who aren't exactly like you), in order to just stay at their weight, even if it's 300 pounds over the healthy level, they have to successfully resist the urge to eat more often than you do. Mocking them for having more fat on their body is like mocking an MMA fighter for having more bruises than you. You're not stronger, you're just living a different life.

This is such fatso apologist horse shit. It takes more will power to eat 4000 calories a day instead of 2000? What the fuck?

Even if it was true, it wouldn't be true: Hardly any fatties are just fatties. Most of them are getting fatter all the time. A 300 pound guy rarely stays 300. He's usually 305 next time you check in.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: MexicanKetchup on February 06, 2014, 01:23:13 PM
when I slimmed down I couldn't eat a donut without feeling bloated only a few months after I started hitting the gym and changed my diet. what the fuck is this shit?

Yeah, I used to be a fat guy. You know why I'm not anymore? I stopped eating shit. I just cold quit. I eat healthy food, lots of vegetables and get plenty of exercise. The pounds just vanished. To this day I can occasionally eat cookies, cake or whatever like a normal fucking human being without my brain forcing me to vacuum down an entire plate.

It's called willpower you broken pieces of fat fucking shit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on February 06, 2014, 01:34:27 PM
you know who has a lot of willpower? people who do a shitload of heroin, i mean think about all the willpower it takes to not do twice as much heroin as they do
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Hollywood Shabat Goy Yaro on February 06, 2014, 02:10:06 PM
Nice to know a hambeast has more willpower than a former chubbster like me who exercises six days a week.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Strategically placed watermelon on February 06, 2014, 02:21:04 PM
If you think about it, fat people get WAY more exercise than skinny people. They lift an extra 200 lbs of weight 24/7, everywhere they go.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Bobby Hill in a dress on February 06, 2014, 03:09:52 PM
How can you two bring this up and not even mention the worst part of it:

Quote
I'm sure I've said this to people many times over the years, along with all of the other terrible advice on this list. So if I could go back in time, I'd tell Past David, and anyone else offering this condescending, dismissive, wet shart of an attempt at advice, to please grasp something:

The fat people you make fun of and condescend to probably have more willpower than you do.

That's because (and you would know this, Past David, if you were capable of pulling your head out of your own asshole long enough to grasp the idea that the universe contains beings who aren't exactly like you), in order to just stay at their weight, even if it's 300 pounds over the healthy level, they have to successfully resist the urge to eat more often than you do. Mocking them for having more fat on their body is like mocking an MMA fighter for having more bruises than you. You're not stronger, you're just living a different life.
Jesus christ this is so blatantly in your face stupid that it has to be some kind of satire.

Fat people are fat not necessarily because they eat more; they're fat because they eat shit. Take a 300+ pound dude, change nothing with the frequency with which he eats or the portions of his food. Just replace Mountain Dew with water, and Cheetoes with carrot sticks or sliced fruit. Wait a whole year and dude will be at least 50 lbs lighter.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Male Gaze on February 09, 2014, 01:21:31 AM
I'm a fat fuck. I spent two years not being a fat fuck after being a fat fuck all my life because I got a job that involved tons of physical labor and the fat slid off like water.

Suddenly I'm at a desk chair all the time and I'm a fat fuck again, but I'm sure it's just because I carry fat genes because we're all totally hardwired by genetics and the environment is irrelevant except when this leads to problematic ideas of biological determinism for protected groups.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on February 09, 2014, 01:36:50 AM
#5. Jack Sparrow Became a Pirate Because He Refused to Haul Slaves (deleted scene from the movie)

Jesus fucking Christ if they put that bullshit in the movie everything Sparrow said he loves about piracy would've been utter bullshit, along with a totally different view the character would've had overall. They don't know how lucky they were by deleting that shit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Male Gaze on February 09, 2014, 01:38:56 AM
I just watched the second movie a couple days ago and Jack Sparrow gleefully sold Will Turner into supernatural slavery.

Someone has probably written a slashfic about it.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on February 09, 2014, 04:51:48 AM
I just watched the second movie a couple days ago and Jack Sparrow gleefully sold Will Turner into supernatural slavery.

Someone has probably written a slashfic about it.

There are currently 19,800 stories in the Pirates of the Caribbeans section of fanfiction.net. That doesn't count personal blogs/tumblrs/Brooklyn Bruiser's porn story forum, etc.

So yes, someone almost certainly has.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on February 09, 2014, 01:47:12 PM
when I slimmed down I couldn't eat a donut without feeling bloated only a few months after I started hitting the gym and changed my diet. what the fuck is this shit?

Yeah, I used to be a fat guy. You know why I'm not anymore? I stopped eating shit. I just cold quit. I eat healthy food, lots of vegetables and get plenty of exercise. The pounds just vanished. To this day I can occasionally eat cookies, cake or whatever like a normal fucking human being without my brain forcing me to vacuum down an entire plate.

It's called willpower you broken pieces of fat fucking shit.

TO be fair, one thing you can relate to is that you don't really realize how healthy actually feel until you get there.

Even people who have been fat their whole lives think they know what healthy means.  They think it's "normal" to be 30-40 pounds overweight and that they're constant depression and lethargy is normal.

It's only after you spend a considerable amount of time avoiding shit like soda and salty/fatty foods that you truly get it.  I was once a fat fuck too dude.  When I first started eating veggies routinely I *HATED* it. I wanted to eat a fuckton of pasta and cheese (lol I know) not a salad with baked lean chicken/fish.  After a few months, I decided I wanted a soda for some reason.  You know what? I COULDN'T FINISH IT.  It's gross.  Overpowering in how fucking sugary they are.  Also, you start to learn what being "full" means.  One of the worst though is that all of a sudden you feel like dogshit having a large hamburger or something (even if you made it yourself).  That bloating and shit you get is your body saying "oh, shit, this isn't GOOD!!"  When your diet and lifestyle are shit, even your body "gives up" and that's why you don't feel *as bad* about it!

It's very easy when you do nothing but drink soda and eat bread all day to think that's what's delicious.  You may even convince yourself you're being healthy by eating lots of fruits (which have tons of natural sugar).  It's only when you make a concentrated effort to being healthy that you realize just what you should feel like every day.

Exercising regularly only serves to supplement your feeling good.

Lots of people give up because you will feel like total shit for a long while when you first attempt this plan.  In fact, you'll probably feel the worst you've ever felt.  Keeping at it for about a month, all of a sudden it reverses.  Suddenly, if you take a week (in some cases a day) off from exercise, all of a sudden you feel SLOW the next day.

Being healthy does feel better and wonderful.  Sorry for this 888 bullshit post, but as a fat who HTFU'd up and made the transformation, you should be keenly aware of what actually goes on in the minds of people who haven't yet.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on February 09, 2014, 01:52:44 PM
How can you two bring this up and not even mention the worst part of it:

Quote
I'm sure I've said this to people many times over the years, along with all of the other terrible advice on this list. So if I could go back in time, I'd tell Past David, and anyone else offering this condescending, dismissive, wet shart of an attempt at advice, to please grasp something:

The fat people you make fun of and condescend to probably have more willpower than you do.

That's because (and you would know this, Past David, if you were capable of pulling your head out of your own asshole long enough to grasp the idea that the universe contains beings who aren't exactly like you), in order to just stay at their weight, even if it's 300 pounds over the healthy level, they have to successfully resist the urge to eat more often than you do. Mocking them for having more fat on their body is like mocking an MMA fighter for having more bruises than you. You're not stronger, you're just living a different life.
Jesus christ this is so blatantly in your face stupid that it has to be some kind of satire.

Fat people are fat not necessarily because they eat more; they're fat because they eat shit. Take a 300+ pound dude, change nothing with the frequency with which he eats or the portions of his food. Just replace Mountain Dew with water, and Cheetoes with carrot sticks or sliced fruit. Wait a whole year and dude will be at least 50 lbs lighter.

When I was my worst, I was ~240 pounds.  I lost like 15 pounds by just cutting soda out and stopping with the snacking at the vending machine that sat two doors down from my office.  I hadn't even started exercising regularly yet.

It doesn't take "more willpower", that's goony fucking bullshit.  As I just said though, you do have to realize that when you're fat you often do crave shitty foods more than healthy foods. They legitimately just don't know what healthy feels like.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Bobby Hill in a dress on February 09, 2014, 04:39:41 PM
Soda is a lot like cigarettes in that aspect. When you're drinking cola regularly it tastes great and the fizz feels good. Then if you quit for an extended period of time and try having some again, it's so sweet that you want to vomit. Likewise with cigarettes they taste amazing as long as you're a regular smoker. Go 3-4 days without a smoke and then try having one. It's like someone dumped ash into your mouth and it takes a few smokes before you enjoy it again.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on February 09, 2014, 05:11:09 PM
888! 888!

I lost a bunch of weight.

A problem a lot of fat people have is that they initially take an all or nothing approach.  If you go from eating fast food three times a day to eating egg whites and oatmeal, you will feel like fucking shit.  I did that and the first two weeks were pretty agonizing until my body adjusted to the healthier food.

Here's what I should have done:

First week: replaced pop and liquid calories with water, coffee, and/or tea
Second week: Replaced breakfast with something nutritious
Third week: Replaced lunch with something nutritious
Fourth week: Replaced dinner with something nutritious

If you take the all or nothing approach, most fat people are going to fail.  You will feel really shitty one night, snap, eat a Big Mac, say "fuck it", and go back to how it was.  If people took a more gradual approach, people would have more success.  I think that doesn't get emphasized enough.  There is also the social element but I don't think that is as big of a deal as people say.  Worst case scenario, you can go one night a week eating like shit as long as the rest of the week you're fine.  You will feel like shit after eating a burger and you'll realize that eating that shit isn't good for you.

Because losing weight is initially difficult, this is where sites like cracked.com get it wrong.  They assume that because you have those urges to down a Code Red, that means being fat is perfectly natural, and anyone who says otherwise is a fascist piece of shit.  They conflate sugar withdrawals with genetic predisposition to being fat.  It's also true that people do have different metabolisms.  We all know people who eat like shit but don't gain any weight.  Goons are so hung up on screaming about equality that they think it is ok for everyone to eat like shit because there's that one guy who eats McDonald's all the time but has a six pack.  Might as well give up, right?  At any rate, fat people know they're fat and no matter how much they scream about fat shaming or some fat chick taking a picture of her stretch marks, none of them really feel that good about themselves.  It's a defense mechanism.  As much as they may like their fat bodies, most of them would kill to be normal weight.

PCgoons try to pretend there is nothing wrong with being fat but it sucked.  I'm not even talking about the social aspects.  I needed more sleep, I got winded very easily, I felt like I was in a haze all the time, and I barely had enough energy to get from point A to point B.  When I lost over 100 pounds, I had all kinds of energy I didn't know I had and felt like a functional human being who was thriving, not just surviving.  It's a shame these fat people would rather wallow in their obesity but that's their life.  PCgoons will scream all day about how my opinions are wrong and that the corpulent are one of society's many poor victims of the patriarchy but fuck it, I'll take being part of the "problem" over being 300 lbs any day.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on February 10, 2014, 12:56:41 AM
We had a thread on TNE where people talked about working out. A surprising amount of SASSers were fat nerds during their high school and college years.  I guess that's not terribly surprising given we posted on SA and now post on a forum of a forum.

Interesting that so many SASSers who are disgusted with goons have made themselves better and escape gooniness!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: High Impact Sexbot 2020 on February 10, 2014, 10:06:17 PM
But self-improvement is scientifically impossible!  :parsons:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Gotta hav my pogs on February 11, 2014, 03:01:25 AM
Quote
One thing I'm pretty sure men don't have to ask when clothes shopping is, "Is this supposed to be a long shirt, or a short dress?" This is a common question for many women. If you're at a department store, you might be lucky enough to see it printed on the price tag, but if not, good luck. Other pieces of clothing that can be confused are tube tops and short skirts, leg warmers and arm warmers, and whether something is supposed to be pajamas or not.

This inept bitch can't figure out how to wear clothes because they come in different sizes and fabrics.

Quote
The end result of all this is that because of the good cut, I end up wearing my World of Warcraft T-shirts a lot even though I don't play the game anymore and am honestly a little embarrassed.

Of course you do.

From the author of: 'Plus Sized' Clothes: Translating the Baffling Euphemisms and 5 Reasons Riding a Bike Is The Most Humiliating Exercise.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Tranny Feet on February 11, 2014, 09:57:39 AM
"A good cut." No, the reason you feel comfortable in your WoW t-shirts is because they're big enough to fit over your doughy frame without being too clingy and making you look like the Michelin Man. It's fuck all to do with the "cut" of an XXL $0.03 sweatshop t-shirt. It's modern day sackcloth.

Being in shape actually makes shopping for clothes more of a pain in the ass because when you're taking pride in your appearance you want to look good and accentuate the work you put in so it takes effort, rather than throwing the nearest cape-like fabric over your amorphous body. Putting on an appreciable amount of muscle also makes buying shit like dress shirts a fucking annoyance because what fits your new thicker chest and shoulders might be too long in the arms etc., brah.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Gotta hav my pogs on February 11, 2014, 11:08:58 AM
Men's clothes are actually harder to buy than women's because the fit has to be exact while women's clothes have some leeway in drape. Or you can go to a tailor, but don't even mention an added cost to these gormless walmart fatties.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: armchair nazi on February 11, 2014, 03:46:10 PM
"A good cut." No, the reason you feel comfortable in your WoW t-shirts is because they're big enough to fit over your doughy frame without being too clingy and making you look like the Michelin Man. It's fuck all to do with the "cut" of an XXL $0.03 sweatshop t-shirt. It's modern day sackcloth.

Being in shape actually makes shopping for clothes more of a pain in the ass because when you're taking pride in your appearance you want to look good and accentuate the work you put in so it takes effort, rather than throwing the nearest cape-like fabric over your amorphous body. Putting on an appreciable amount of muscle also makes buying shit like dress shirts a fucking annoyance because what fits your new thicker chest and shoulders might be too long in the arms etc., brah.

yeah, and the other problem with this is that all the cuts assume you weigh like 500 pounds. if you have a large neck or wide shoulders or whatever, the rest of the shirt is NEVER going to fit because the assumption is that you are a blob

thank god for slim cuts, but even then they often think you have the physique of an aids patient
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on February 12, 2014, 02:28:36 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-life-lessons-you-learn-from-being-bullied/

I expected that article to be absolute shit but turned out to be some pretty good real talk and realism

maybe there's hope
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BubbaCat on February 12, 2014, 02:54:36 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-life-lessons-you-learn-from-being-bullied/

I expected that article to be absolute shit but turned out to be some pretty good real talk and realism

maybe there's hope

Changing the world :50bux: at a time. :ignatius:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on February 12, 2014, 05:13:42 PM
Make this an emote
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on February 23, 2014, 08:50:49 AM
Quote
Look at the original Predator film: the manliest men in the history of all time, plus Hawkins, with massive guns in a hot, steamy jungle. It's sweat and muscles and massive barrels on the hunt. But the thing they're hunting is also hunting them, watching them as they fumble about through the woods chasing their own tails, learning about them, playing with them until it decides to make its own move and start picking them off one at a time. The entire movie is an "alpha male's" skewed perspective on dating -- women on the prowl, using and abusing men who, despite all their power, still fall victim to the sly and subtle cruelty of the pussy. And that's all it is, it just has a vagina face. There's nothing else feminine about it because the entire female has been reduced to one body part that now has teeth in it.
:megatuss:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on February 23, 2014, 09:20:59 AM
They reposted this nugget on the frontpage again

http://www.cracked.com/article_19785_5-ways-modern-men-are-trained-to-hate-women.html

looks like they are gonna just doubledown on sjw shit from here on out.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on February 23, 2014, 09:33:35 AM
by far the most embarrassing article Wong has ever written.

the entire thing is basically "here's a bunch of goony sexist shit I do" but veiled as "here's what SOCIETY tells US, MEN to do"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on February 23, 2014, 09:50:25 AM
This whole article is full of logical fallacies and extrapolating the author's own social inadequacies to the entirety of society. I feel bad for David Wong if he spends his whole life in the thrall of the all-mighty vagina. Wong needs to get off the internet because Reddit isn't a representative sample of anyone, men or women.

Quote
"See, every single male can remember the first time, when he was 5 or 6 years old, he showed his penis to a stranger and everybody started freaking the hell out."

Seriously, look at this shit. How can anyone not conclude that this guy has some problems?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OOK OOK SCREE (D-IL) on February 23, 2014, 10:08:15 AM
This whole article is full of logical fallacies and extrapolating the author's own social inadequacies to the entirety of society. I feel bad for David Wong if he spends his whole life in the thrall of the all-mighty vagina. Wong needs to get off the internet because Reddit isn't a representative sample of anyone, men or women.

Quote
"See, every single male can remember the first time, when he was 5 or 6 years old, he showed his penis to a stranger and everybody started freaking the hell out."

Seriously, look at this shit. How can anyone not conclude that this guy has some problems?

Quote
We're starving, and all women are various types of food. Only instead of food, it's sex. And we're trying to conduct our everyday business around the fact that we're trying to renew our driver's license with a talking pair of boobs.

:stonk:

What is wrong with this guy?  Giving advice is about the last thing he's qualified to do. 
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on February 23, 2014, 10:33:57 AM
This whole article is full of logical fallacies and extrapolating the author's own social inadequacies to the entirety of society. I feel bad for David Wong if he spends his whole life in the thrall of the all-mighty vagina. Wong needs to get off the internet because Reddit isn't a representative sample of anyone, men or women.

Quote
"See, every single male can remember the first time, when he was 5 or 6 years old, he showed his penis to a stranger and everybody started freaking the hell out."

Seriously, look at this shit. How can anyone not conclude that this guy has some problems?

Quote
We're starving, and all women are various types of food. Only instead of food, it's sex. And we're trying to conduct our everyday business around the fact that we're trying to renew our driver's license with a talking pair of boobs.

:stonk:

What is wrong with this guy?  Giving advice is about the last thing he's qualified to do.
all the guys reading this will remember the time when they whipped out their dick and slapped their girlfriend across the face with it for refusing to do the dishes. right guys? we're all victims of society here. :unparsons:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on February 23, 2014, 10:50:57 AM
 I tried to write something intelligent here but sex kept distracting me :rolleyes:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on February 23, 2014, 11:00:43 AM
Someone needs to tell John Cheese that you can't apologie your way into being a better likeable person.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on February 23, 2014, 11:30:54 AM
My God, the writers of cracked are getting alpha'ed by robo-ads.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on February 23, 2014, 12:45:47 PM
itt David "Penectomy Imminent" Wong writes another shitty diatribe about "modern men"

Quote
And now you see the problem. From birth we're taught that we're owed a beautiful girl. We all think of ourselves as the hero of our own story, and we all (whether we admit it or not) think we're heroes for just getting through our day.

So it's very frustrating, and I mean frustrating to the point of violence, when we don't get what we're owed. A contract has been broken. These women, by exercising their own choices, are denying it to us. It's why every Nice Guy is shocked to find that buying gifts for a girl and doing her favors won't win him sex. It's why we go to "slut" and "whore" as our default insults -- we're not mad that women enjoy sex. We're mad that women are distributing to other people the sex that they owed us.

Yes, the women in these stories are being portrayed as wonderful and beautiful and perfect. But remember, there are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.

hm yes  :goonthink:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: VFW on February 23, 2014, 03:25:52 PM
itt David "Penectomy Imminent" Wong writes another shitty diatribe about "modern men"

Quote
And now you see the problem. From birth we're taught that we're owed a beautiful girl. We all think of ourselves as the hero of our own story, and we all (whether we admit it or not) think we're heroes for just getting through our day.

So it's very frustrating, and I mean frustrating to the point of violence, when we don't get what we're owed. A contract has been broken. These women, by exercising their own choices, are denying it to us. It's why every Nice Guy is shocked to find that buying gifts for a girl and doing her favors won't win him sex. It's why we go to "slut" and "whore" as our default insults -- we're not mad that women enjoy sex. We're mad that women are distributing to other people the sex that they owed us.

Yes, the women in these stories are being portrayed as wonderful and beautiful and perfect. But remember, there are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.

hm yes  :goonthink:

David "Chong dong" Wong proves that beta faggots pretending to be nice are untrustworthy psychotics through this incredible act of projection.txt
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on February 23, 2014, 04:21:30 PM
itt David "Penectomy Imminent" Wong writes another shitty diatribe about "modern men"

Quote
And now you see the problem. From birth we're taught that we're owed a beautiful girl. We all think of ourselves as the hero of our own story, and we all (whether we admit it or not) think we're heroes for just getting through our day.

So it's very frustrating, and I mean frustrating to the point of violence, when we don't get what we're owed. A contract has been broken. These women, by exercising their own choices, are denying it to us. It's why every Nice Guy is shocked to find that buying gifts for a girl and doing her favors won't win him sex. It's why we go to "slut" and "whore" as our default insults -- we're not mad that women enjoy sex. We're mad that women are distributing to other people the sex that they owed us.

Yes, the women in these stories are being portrayed as wonderful and beautiful and perfect. But remember, there are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.

hm yes  :goonthink:

David "Chong dong" Wong proves that beta faggots prettending to be nice are untrustworthy psychotics through this incredible act of projection.txt

 :adam: Wow its  almost as if David Wong's only experience with men is a bunch of beta-nerds on the internet.

 Of course he's just going to dismiss any similar conclusions you could make about women based on the type of media they consume because *reasons* :rolleyes:

 :ultlibrage: INTERNALIZED MISOGYNY Just ugh :ultlibrage:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on February 23, 2014, 10:42:25 PM
reminder that David Wong votes republican more often than not and wrote an article specifically about hardening the fuck up http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person/

if he truly believed women in the privileged Cracked-reading world were treated as badly as his 'ways we are trained to hate women' article claims, he'd have had to predate every single one of his points in the above article with 'if you are a man'.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on February 23, 2014, 10:59:01 PM
maybe david wong doesnt believe any of it and just knows his audience
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on February 23, 2014, 11:19:18 PM
maybe david wong doesnt believe any of it and just knows his audience

turns out....david wong was the alpha all along  :adam:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on February 24, 2014, 09:28:22 AM
jesus christ the word 'projection' just kept flashing in my head over and over agai. dude needs help
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on March 19, 2014, 10:00:35 AM
cracked has an article ablooblooing about how hard it is to be a tranny

i'm done with cracked (again) (for real this time)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on March 19, 2014, 10:21:07 AM
:lolno:

Quote
#5 We're not trying to trick anyone

Here is how trans women usually show up in pop culture: A straight male character hits on some girl at a bar, only to find, surprise, said lady is transgender. From The Hangover 2 to The Crying Game to a shitload of songs, it's played like the straight male's worst nightmare. And the man's hilarious (negative) reaction is always the point of the story -- his panic, his anger, his disgust. The trans woman is just a prop.

And in every case, we're meant to identify with the guy: He was attracted to her, and since she turned out to have a penis, that attraction was an intentional dupe on the part of the transgender woman.

To you it's probably never been more than a somewhat lazy, throwaway joke, but what the fuck kind of message does it send to young transgender kids? "If you flirt, you're a liar"? By society's unspoken rule, just hanging out at a club is an act of deception for somebody like me. After all, some guy might think I'm cute and approach me. If that person flies into a rage upon hearing the truth, society will be entirely on his side -- even though that rage may involve him trying to beat the shit out of me, or worse.

So for a trans person, that cloud hangs over every flirty interaction. I met a guy at a social event recently and got the feeling he might have been flirting with me, but I didn't know if he knew. I was scared a little the whole time because he was much larger than me (not that I'm small). I waited a month and a half of hanging out, without so much as a touch on the arm, before telling him. It took that long for me to feel sure I'd be safe either way. If you're saying to yourself, "Well, you shouldn't have led him on!" remember that some men consider simply being in the room with them to be "leading them on." You think I'd be safer wearing a sign around my neck? Some people are enraged just by the fact that I exist.

All right, so maybe it's safer to stay at home and try to meet people over the Internet? There we can merely be verbally assaulted, nonstop, in pretty much any setting. Internet slang for a trans woman is "trap," as in, a being who exists only to "trap" males into questioning their sexuality. So now I can be reminded that the world is filled with people who fly into a violent rage at the mere suggestion of my existence, from the comfort of my own home. Thanks, Internet!

:sjw:

And the rest of the points he made?

#4 It's treated like a mental illness!
#3 It's not about surgery!
#2 There's not just one type of trans!
#1 It's fucking dangerous!

Yeah fuck you cracked I'm done for good this time
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on March 19, 2014, 11:21:37 AM
Wow I just saw this, Cracked for God's sake write some funny articles, enough preaching on Tumblr's Crusade of the Week.

"Why won't these bigots just have sex with me? :myecred:"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Strategically placed watermelon on March 19, 2014, 02:18:19 PM
"young transgender kids"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on March 19, 2014, 04:17:16 PM
It's like the tumblr warriors don't understand that it doesn't matter how they try to "normalize" this shit, the majority of the population on earth are never going to want to be approached or involved with a transperson romantically or physically. The majority of the human race is going to be put off by the person's mutilated genitalia and near delusional obsession with being the opposite sex. The majority of people are going to want to date normal, well adjusted people who aren't mental and physical freaks and trainwrecks. This trend is reflected in nearly every species on earth.
Most men and women are looking to court and be with normal men and women who come as close as possible to their type. Even most gays and lesbians, I imagine, are looking to do the very same.

Much luck and love to the people who do want to get involved with transpeople, and much love and luck to their trans partners. For the rest of us, stop trying to normalize it and force this shit on us. If the majority of the population co exists with transpeople and allow them to live their lives as people and citizens, that's as good as it should be expected to get. Coexist and allow each other to function as members of society. Show everyone some human decency, transpeople naturally included. But stop tryin to force eveyone to be big fans of each other.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on March 19, 2014, 04:52:56 PM
Quote
"Only when Andrade grabbed at Zapata's crotch did he discover the truth. But when she smiled at him and said, "I'm all woman"
this is massively fucked up behavior.

but, it's also true that reacting to something like this with >murder< makes you a psycho with no impulse control that shouldn't be roaming the streets.

but then, I can't help but wonder... has any murderer ever actually gotten away with murdering a transsexual person for this reason after a trial? because the case mentioned in the linked article ended with the guy being thrown in jail: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Angie_Zapata
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on March 19, 2014, 07:50:02 PM
i think voluntary manslaughter is a justifiable response to attempted rape
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on March 19, 2014, 09:02:54 PM
i think voluntary manslaughter is a justifiable response to attempted rape
I wouldn't say it's really 'attempted rape'; it's obviously bad but 'doing sexual stuff with a straight guy without telling him about your penis' doesn't quite fit the definition of rape in my mind.

But I AM curious how this stuff would change if it was a lesbian woman who killed a MtF for tricking her. And if she said she was 'triggered by penises' because of a past assault or something. The in-fighting would be crazy, like "Cultural Marxism: a CIS story" but a million times bigger and more intense.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on March 19, 2014, 09:38:02 PM
Wow, Cracked has crossed the Rubicon of Poz, there is no way they can return to what they were.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: MY FURSONOUNS on March 20, 2014, 08:07:22 AM
cracked can fuck right off

and to think the marriage between pointlesswasteoftime.com and the license to the title of a 2nd-rate mad magazine knockoff would have produced this utter bullshit

smh

no wonder they dont let seanbaby reiley write for them anymore
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on March 20, 2014, 08:15:40 AM
cracked can fuck right off

and to think the marriage between pointlesswasteoftime.com and the license to the title of a 2nd-rate mad magazine knockoff would have produced this utter bullshit

smh

no wonder they dont let seanbaby reiley write for them anymore
seanbaby's gta 5 article was reaching for tumblr territory too, was really weird to see since I've liked the guy's shit since I was an internet baby

I don't remember what it said but I remember being with him until a certain line made me go 'wait, what?'.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on March 20, 2014, 11:49:20 AM
cracked can fuck right off

and to think the marriage between pointlesswasteoftime.com and the license to the title of a 2nd-rate mad magazine knockoff would have produced this utter bullshit

smh

no wonder they dont let seanbaby reiley write for them anymore
seanbaby's gta 5 article was reaching for tumblr territory too, was really weird to see since I've liked the guy's shit since I was an internet baby

I don't remember what it said but I remember being with him until a certain line made me go 'wait, what?'.

His article was likely edited by Wong to fit the SJW narrative.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on March 20, 2014, 12:02:56 PM
Thats what I'm betting.

Also, why does everyone, including SS, keep referring to cracked as a comedy site or articles as funny? I never remember so much as smirking at a cracked article. I read them because sometimes they were interesting, and had some really cool historical events, places, or people that I'd never heard of.

I know the authors try to shoehorn phrases like "well he was out of fucks to give!" about some war hero or something, but eh.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: PUSSY CANCER on March 20, 2014, 12:12:46 PM
:lolno:

Quote
#5 We're not trying to trick anyone


So for a trans person, that cloud hangs over every flirty interaction. I met a guy at a social event recently and got the feeling he might have been flirting with me, but I didn't know if he knew. I was scared a little the whole time because he was much larger than me (not that I'm small). I waited a month and a half of hanging out, without so much as a touch on the arm, before telling him. It took that long for me to feel sure I'd be safe either way. If you're saying to yourself, "Well, you shouldn't have led him on!" remember that some men consider simply being in the room with them to be "leading them on." You think I'd be safer wearing a sign around my neck? Some people are enraged just by the fact that I exist.




autism.txt
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on March 20, 2014, 05:36:53 PM
The try really hard to appeal to "nerd" humor. Shit like, "five things you never knew the nazis were doing: hitler was trying to build a casino. Could you imagine if hitler built a casino?!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?! That would be like DARTH VADER opening a BACON FACTORY and MARIO is the salesman and SOLID SNAKE is the customer!!!!!!!!"


It always made me cringe.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on March 20, 2014, 05:50:08 PM
The try really hard to appeal to "nerd" humor. Shit like, "five things you never knew the nazis were doing: hitler was trying to build a casino. Could you imagine if hitler built a casino?!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?! That would be like DARTH VADER opening a BACON FACTORY and MARIO is the salesman and SOLID SNAKE is the customer!!!!!!!!"


It always made me cringe.

This is Cracked we're talking about so you forgot about BATMAN!!1!!1!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on March 20, 2014, 05:54:33 PM
The try really hard to appeal to "nerd" humor. Shit like, "five things you never knew the nazis were doing: hitler was trying to build a casino. Could you imagine if hitler built a casino?!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?! That would be like DARTH VADER opening a BACON FACTORY and MARIO is the salesman and SOLID SNAKE is the customer!!!!!!!!"


It always made me cringe.

This is Cracked we're talking about so you forgot about BATMAN!!1!!1!



HAhAhahahahhahahhahHahahahHah 80's MOVIES!!!!!1111 back to the FUtUrE!!!!!!!!!!!!

We're 80's manchildren kids and we GET IT!!!!!! We're just a bunch of wiley white male 30 somethings trying to date and get jobs but just wanna sit in our underwear and eat PIzZA for breakfast!!!!!! Like the NINJA TURTLES!!!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on March 20, 2014, 06:13:40 PM
I think the last few posts explain why Cracked is going SJW: there are a lot of twentysomething and thirtysomething manchildren who are taking up the SJW cause.  Instead of jerking off about bacon, they're jerking off to themselves for decrying bigotry.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Hollywood Shabat Goy Yaro on March 20, 2014, 06:37:00 PM
I think the last few posts explain why Cracked is going SJW: there are a lot of twentysomething and thirtysomething manchildren who are taking up the SJW cause.  Instead of jerking off about bacon, they're jerking off to themselves for decrying bigotry.

I've noticed this shift as well.  What the Christ prompted it?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on March 20, 2014, 08:13:15 PM
I think the last few posts explain why Cracked is going SJW: there are a lot of twentysomething and thirtysomething manchildren who are taking up the SJW cause.  Instead of jerking off about bacon, they're jerking off to themselves for decrying bigotry.

I've noticed this shift as well.  What the Christ prompted it?

It's cyclical. The flower children move in and tell everyone to be sensitive. Everyone gets tired of being pestered by the flower children, so they get edgy just to piss them off. The edginess starts offending the normal folks, so then the PC crowd moves in and tells us not to badthink. Then they get so annoying that they get pushed back against and we get stuff like early SA. Then the poison womb stuff pushes things back toward the SJWs. Now they're starting to get some pushback, I think we're already seeing that pendulum start to flip back the other way because people are sick of hearing this shit.

Basically, it's driven by what the mushy middle is willing to put up with at any given point- either "we shouldn't be mean to people" which leads to SJW faggotry, or "quit fucking preaching at us every time we say 'blacked out'" which leads to the edgy trend.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on March 20, 2014, 10:49:25 PM
teddy roosevelt would've totally boxed a goddam motherbitching bearshark for gay equality
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on March 20, 2014, 10:57:46 PM
It's cyclical. The flower children move in and tell everyone to be sensitive. Everyone gets tired of being pestered by the flower children, so they get edgy just to piss them off. The edginess starts offending the normal folks, so then the PC crowd moves in and tells us not to badthink. Then they get so annoying that they get pushed back against and we get stuff like early SA. Then the poison womb stuff pushes things back toward the SJWs. Now they're starting to get some pushback, I think we're already seeing that pendulum start to flip back the other way because people are sick of hearing this shit.

Basically, it's driven by what the mushy middle is willing to put up with at any given point- either "we shouldn't be mean to people" which leads to SJW faggotry, or "quit fucking preaching at us every time we say 'blacked out'" which leads to the edgy trend.

4chan does things like the Bikini Bridge troll (http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/bikini-bridge), so I'm wondering when we're going to start seeing more monumentally dumb stuff designed to drive people away from SJWs. They genuinely tried to get people to stop using the word bossy which is essentially a self-inflicted version of what I'm talking about. I want to see a Twitter campaign that tries to convince people that saying you owned somebody in a game is racist.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on March 20, 2014, 11:04:47 PM
It's cyclical. The flower children move in and tell everyone to be sensitive. Everyone gets tired of being pestered by the flower children, so they get edgy just to piss them off. The edginess starts offending the normal folks, so then the PC crowd moves in and tells us not to badthink. Then they get so annoying that they get pushed back against and we get stuff like early SA. Then the poison womb stuff pushes things back toward the SJWs. Now they're starting to get some pushback, I think we're already seeing that pendulum start to flip back the other way because people are sick of hearing this shit.

Basically, it's driven by what the mushy middle is willing to put up with at any given point- either "we shouldn't be mean to people" which leads to SJW faggotry, or "quit fucking preaching at us every time we say 'blacked out'" which leads to the edgy trend.

4chan does things like the Bikini Bridge troll (http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/bikini-bridge), so I'm wondering when we're going to start seeing more monumentally dumb stuff designed to drive people away from SJWs. They genuinely tried to get people to stop using the word bossy which is essentially a self-inflicted version of what I'm talking about. I want to see a Twitter campaign that tries to convince people that saying you owned somebody in a game is racist.

lol the comments on that, what a successful troll

Quote
To the women who think men are pressuring women to look dangerously thin like this... No... No we aren't. Most guys find this unattractive and wish these ladies would eat a god damned double bacon cheeseburger with an extra large side of fries...

The people pressuring you to look like this are fashion magazines and hollywood.

Being healthy means being having a proper lean-fat ratio at a healthy weight based on your own physical build... Yes, there is such a thing as being "big boned"---It simply means you have a larger bone structure, i.e. broad shoulders and a deeper chest (distance from the peak of the ribs to the back of the shoulder blades)
    :say:
:parsons:

Quote
Why the fuck would you want a girl who eats double bacon cheeseburgers more than a salad? Are you actually looking for hamplanets?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on March 21, 2014, 01:02:28 AM
a few days ago I came across 'Listverse' which seemed like Cracked without the lame ninja star war turtle zombie skyrim dick comedy so I thought "I guess this is a good site" but then I saw an article titled "8 reasons the moon landing might be a hoax"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Trump is the New Norma on March 21, 2014, 11:04:49 AM
I think the last few posts explain why Cracked is going SJW: there are a lot of twentysomething and thirtysomething manchildren who are taking up the SJW cause.  Instead of jerking off about bacon, they're jerking off to themselves for decrying bigotry.

I've noticed this shift as well.  What the Christ prompted it?
Internet echo chambers, mostly. SJWs are shockingly good at taking over online communities, simply because they don't have anything else to do other than sit online all day and bitch.

The whole "blame society" rhetoric also appeals to unemployable/retail/permastudent nerds who are desperately seeking excuses for their failures in life.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on March 21, 2014, 12:09:04 PM
Could you imagine if hitler built a casino?!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?! That would be like DARTH VADER opening a BACON FACTORY and MARIO is the salesman and SOLID SNAKE is the customer!!!!!!!!"


It always made me cringe.

You just described the "comedic styling" of Seth MacFarlane.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on March 22, 2014, 03:33:45 AM
Thats what I'm betting.

Also, why does everyone, including SS, keep referring to cracked as a comedy site or articles as funny? I never remember so much as smirking at a cracked article. I read them because sometimes they were interesting, and had some really cool historical events, places, or people that I'd never heard of.

I know the authors try to shoehorn phrases like "well he was out of fucks to give!" about some war hero or something, but eh.

Cracked.com articles used to be good if you spent about 4 minutes skimming them. "Six Alternate Movie Endings That Totally Redeem The Movie" or whatever. Sometimes it's interesting. The writing was always contrived over-written goonfiction.txt shit, but skimming the list used to be a good way to kill a few minutes.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SSOUL TRANN on March 22, 2014, 02:45:55 PM
I hated cracked before hating cracked was cool.

 :colbert:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Mullah Omar on March 22, 2014, 06:16:27 PM
I liked cracked because of its TEN COOL THINGS and not the bad writing/jokes.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OSI on March 22, 2014, 07:15:23 PM
I think the last few posts explain why Cracked is going SJW: there are a lot of twentysomething and thirtysomething manchildren who are taking up the SJW cause.  Instead of jerking off about bacon, they're jerking off to themselves for decrying bigotry.

I've noticed this shift as well.  What the Christ prompted it?

"Maybe now I'll finally get laid."

Beta males unwilling to struggle so they think they'll get some if they just submit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Internet Catchphrase on March 22, 2014, 07:43:32 PM
I hated cracked before hating cracked was cool.

 :colbert:

This. My dad had boxes full of old 70s mad magazines when they came in the novel sized editions in Italian that I used to read as a kid. Cracked was for the "OMG SO RANDOM" faggots that became Family Guy fans.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on April 01, 2014, 02:33:28 AM
e: nm
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: LiberalNutJob on April 04, 2014, 06:05:12 PM
I think the last few posts explain why Cracked is going SJW: there are a lot of twentysomething and thirtysomething manchildren who are taking up the SJW cause.  Instead of jerking off about bacon, they're jerking off to themselves for decrying bigotry.

Pretty much every social media site is going this way. People can't take jokes anymore and take everything seriously as a personal insult to them because of how rapidly the internet has been inserted into our lives, and because it's extremely easy to unify the loudest and smallest groups of people in the world if they only have the will to do so...and even that's changing with the internet providers and companies making the entire thing into an echo chamber
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on April 04, 2014, 11:01:38 PM
I don't think its a coincidence that the people with few things keeping them from spending all their time on social media comprise the most vocal parts of the internet.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on April 04, 2014, 11:19:51 PM
The Arab Spring also kicked social justice warrior bullshit to a more obnoxious level.  People seriously believed that it was possible to carry out revolutions with social media and that we were all headed towards pozzed social democracy thanks to Facebook and Twitter.  Of course, Arab Spring was kind of a bust as secular leaders are now getting replaced with Islam fundamentalists but that's neither here or there.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rocket on April 05, 2014, 12:53:07 AM
(http://i.imgur.com/rV5Dsiv.jpg)

sick pubeburns brah
Someone with XY chromosomes wrote that? And then with the picture, come on... you're kidding, right? Like, what jury would even think of convicting you for just beating him and beating him until you got tired?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on April 05, 2014, 04:25:17 PM
Someone with XY chromosomes wrote that? And then with the picture, come on... you're kidding, right? Like, what jury would even think of convicting you for just beating him and beating him until you got tired?

The jury that finds your continual references to 'that little faggot over there' in the closing argument to be offensive?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on April 14, 2014, 05:45:01 PM
Cracked Humor for 2014

(http://i.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/article/5/8/9/260589.jpg?v=1)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on April 14, 2014, 10:45:44 PM
MARIO on drums with TEDDY ROOSEVELT on the KEYbOArd!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on April 15, 2014, 12:07:54 AM
MARIO on drums with TEDDY ROOSEVELT on the KEYbOArd!!!!!!!

rofl
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on April 23, 2014, 11:52:50 AM
MARIO on drums with TEDDY ROOSEVELT on the KEYbOArd!!!!!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=va66qI7GRdc
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on April 23, 2014, 01:16:15 PM
Debunking cracked articles would be a pretty decent SS shtick/troll when SA goes away.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on April 23, 2014, 01:23:00 PM
I dont get how cracked peddles fruity sjw shit but still gets apparently normal guest writers to write articles like 6 things you dont know about submarine life wtf
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on April 23, 2014, 01:26:16 PM
I dont get how cracked peddles fruity sjw shit but still gets apparently normal guest writers to write articles like 6 things you dont know about submarine life wtf

The informative lists about movies, etc are pretty damned entertaining.  Besides that and the guest writers/photoplasties, I'd never visit the fucking site.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on May 13, 2014, 06:05:30 PM
fat piece of shit who went on the biggest loser and lost complains about how its hard to lose weight and how reality tv shows are faked

http://www.cracked.com/article_21137_5-details-they-cut-from-my-season-the-biggest-loser.html
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Black Gardener on May 13, 2014, 08:26:34 PM
Thinkgeek.com is still in business, so there is a market for crap like that.  Still not funny, though.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on May 14, 2014, 10:26:10 AM
fat piece of shit who went on the biggest loser and lost complains about how its hard to lose weight and how reality tv shows are faked

http://www.cracked.com/article_21137_5-details-they-cut-from-my-season-the-biggest-loser.html

Article is shit, but so is the regimen described for the TV show.

No surprise that a reality show cares more about drama and dramatic results than healthy, sustainable weight loss.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: unprivsplain on May 14, 2014, 11:18:24 AM
She keeps talking about healthy weightloss, but that isn't geared towards the obese. They could probably shed 15 pounds in a week just from not drinking coke.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on May 14, 2014, 11:33:42 AM
She keeps talking about healthy weightloss, but that isn't geared towards the obese. They could probably shed 15 pounds in a week just from not drinking coke.

Long-term it is exactly geared toward the obese. Her mistake is that she thinks three pounds a month is 'excellent' when it's at the low end of the more healthy and sustainable six-to-eight pounds a month. Now early on there will be some quick drops from taking out the truly sick unhealthy shit like sodas, but a fifteen pound loss is a drop in the bucket for 300+ pounds.

Running fat people hard will just fuck their joints, shock their system into calorie conservation, and cause them to rebound right back to fat hard once they slow down. Then they get bummed out and give up.

Also, a proper exercise regimen will result in plateaus from gaining lean muscle, which is why a program has to be long-term and not obsess over bullshit weekly totals.

The ideal regimen to take somebody from morbidly obese down to healthy weight is a year to two-year program with steady progress, not a high-speed conversion to eye candy.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on May 14, 2014, 12:24:59 PM
She keeps talking about healthy weightloss, but that isn't geared towards the obese. They could probably shed 15 pounds in a week just from not drinking coke.

I stopped drinking pop years ago and it didn't result in any noticeable changes, but keep parroting that!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on May 14, 2014, 12:30:32 PM
Fat people who cut soda out of their diet entirely and don't lose weight either

1) Didn't drink enough soda to be a problem (like a couple of cans a week)
2) Replaced the calories with other calories

The only way to lose weight is to cut calories, not a specific foodstuff.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on May 14, 2014, 01:22:10 PM
She keeps talking about healthy weightloss, but that isn't geared towards the obese. They could probably shed 15 pounds in a week just from not drinking coke.

I stopped drinking pop years ago and it didn't result in any noticeable changes, but keep parroting that!

I used to drink proto-goon levels of soda, like a case a week. Bootcamp broke me of that habit, and almost as importantly made me replace soda with water and powerade. Now I limit myself to a maximum of 24 oz of soda a week, only with meals or alcohol. Soda has a shitton of calories, but stuff like juice drinks have as much or more.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on May 14, 2014, 02:43:13 PM
yeah exactly if you switch soda with juice it might actually be worse, that shit is full of sugar. I barely drink juice because I'd rather drink water and coffee and eat more instead

or smoothies. those are fucking excellent
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on May 14, 2014, 05:37:25 PM
Fat people who cut soda out of their diet entirely and don't lose weight either

1) Didn't drink enough soda to be a problem (like a couple of cans a week)
2) Replaced the calories with other calories

The only way to lose weight is to cut calories, not a specific foodstuff.

if you're running a 1,000 calorie a day surplus like a lot of obese people, and cut out soda, a lot of times that's only enough to slow your rate of weight GAIN.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Babomb on May 14, 2014, 06:50:17 PM
She keeps talking about healthy weightloss, but that isn't geared towards the obese. They could probably shed 15 pounds in a week just from not drinking coke.

I stopped drinking pop years ago and it didn't result in any noticeable changes, but keep parroting that!
I used to drink goon levels of soda.  Now I'm down to a few 20 oz bottles a week and am decreasing that as well.  I've noticed that when I get thirsty I don't even crave soda anymore and the thought of injesting how much i used to makes me sick. 

You can't just starve yourself and hope you'll weight either.  Starving yourself is the worst thing you can do since your body goes into survive mode and burns much fewer calories.  Best thing is to increase your activity, slow enough so your fat turns to muscle and you shed excess weight but not so fast that you burn out and your body just can't take it. 

The end goal is to make healthy eating and activity a part of your lifestyle.  Having an active lifestyle is much healthier than one where you just sit around all day playing video games on Steam eating shitty processed foods and downing a case of soda a day.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on May 14, 2014, 06:51:45 PM
'survival mode' is bullshit and it's what fats use as an excuse to explain why they haven't lost weight

a calorie is a calorie and if you're eating at deficit your body won't suddenly adjust itself and your 3500 deficit won't make you lose a pound
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Babomb on May 14, 2014, 08:42:34 PM
'survival mode' is bullshit and it's what fats use as an excuse to explain why they haven't lost weight

a calorie is a calorie and if you're eating at deficit your body won't suddenly adjust itself and your 3500 deficit won't make you lose a pound
Survival mode means your body burns calories slower.  It still cannabilizes its own energy reserves (fat and muscle).

Of course you need to manage your calorie intake to how many calories you burn, but you don't get the best results by starving yourself.  Your body needs incoming calories for energy.  The trick is to eat better foods and increase your activity, not cut all food completely and starve yourself.

I'm not saying eating a deficit is bad when trying to lose weight.  I'm saying not eating at all, or not eating enough while being active won't get you the best results.

tl;dr Eat better foods, learn portion control, and increase your activity to lose weight.  While starving yourself can work it isn't very healthy.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on May 14, 2014, 08:55:56 PM
'survival mode' is bullshit and it's what fats use as an excuse to explain why they haven't lost weight

a calorie is a calorie and if you're eating at deficit your body won't suddenly adjust itself and your 3500 deficit won't make you lose a pound
Survival mode means your body burns calories slower.  It still cannabilizes its own energy reserves (fat and muscle).

Of course you need to manage your calorie intake to how many calories you burn, but you don't get the best results by starving yourself.  Your body needs incoming calories for energy.  The trick is to eat better foods and increase your activity, not cut all food completely and starve yourself.

I'm not saying eating a deficit is bad when trying to lose weight.  I'm saying not eating at all, or not eating enough while being active won't get you the best results.

tl;dr Eat better foods, learn portion control, and increase your activity to lose weight.  While starving yourself can work it isn't very healthy.

The heart of your message is correct, but a person with enough excess fat (goons) can eat at a huge deficit and burn their fat stores... not muscle.

The body *does* burn muscle... but only if it has to.  It'd much rather burn fat.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on May 14, 2014, 08:57:05 PM
Don't eat a shitty diet that destroys your metabolism though, yeah.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Transaction on May 14, 2014, 09:08:35 PM
She keeps talking about healthy weightloss, but that isn't geared towards the obese. They could probably shed 15 pounds in a week just from not drinking coke.

I stopped drinking pop years ago and it didn't result in any noticeable changes, but keep parroting that!

I used to drink proto-goon levels of soda, like a case a week. Bootcamp broke me of that habit, and almost as importantly made me replace soda with water and powerade. Now I limit myself to a maximum of 24 oz of soda a week, only with meals or alcohol. Soda has a shitton of calories, but stuff like juice drinks have as much or more.

Powerade contains more sugar than soft drinks like Coke.

Don't stop drinking it, but be careful with that stuff.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on May 14, 2014, 10:14:40 PM
Survival mode is not bullshit. Eating at a deficit is a good and necessary part of weight loss, but it's important to manage it carefully so that your body efficiently converts the fuel you use into the muscle you're building from exercise.

The main reason people don't lose weight is because it's a long-term project that requires dramatic changes to lifestyle. Food substitutions need to be made from shit food, certain luxuries need to be cut out (soda soda soda, french fries, ice cream) and weight should be lost in a gradual, measured fashion.

To take somebody from 300 to 160 can take upwards of a bit under two years at a good rate of six pounds a month. Doing it in a nice, gradual fashion helps insure that the healthy routines become ground in enough for the subject to retain the habits after they've reached optimal weight.

The most important facets of a diet are this:

Does it provide the body with the fuel and nutrients it needs?

Does it provide enough calorie deficit to promote the burning of fat?

Is it sustainable for the individual taking the diet?

Once they hit maintenance level, is the maintenance level diet plan going to work for them?

So yeah, HTFU and all, but do it smart. Crash diets and ersatz boot camp bullshit for a few months won't accomplish that. The recidivism rate on those is phenomenal and because we live in a "results, NOW" oriented society that's one reason fat people stay fat.

The turtle won the race, go with the turtle.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on May 15, 2014, 04:24:39 AM
Survival mode is not bullshit. Eating at a deficit is a good and necessary part of weight loss, but it's important to manage it carefully so that your body efficiently converts the fuel you use into the muscle you're building from exercise.

Cis and 19CVS are both right. Survival mode is not bullshit, but Calories are calories - just remember your body doesn't take in 100% of the calories you give it. When you body is in calorie deficit mode, it will absorb things at different rates than when its in surplus -when your body is running a deficit its more likely to try to get as much nutrition out of the food you feed it.

The Atkins takes advantage of this:  fats and proteins take more energy to absorb, so when there is a lack of 'easy' calories, like sugars and starches, your body will not absorb every calorie of protein and fat that passes through. Likewise the body of a goon is going to be less likely to try to squeeze every gram of protein out of its diet than someone getting swole.

This is also partly why eating many smaller meals helps with weightloss - your body never exits absorption mode so its not just burning more calories, but its less likely to try to squeeze extra calories out of the food you've already eaten. 
These are pretty slight differences, but over time they can add up.

tl;dr
"Eat less calories and you burn and you will lose weight" is more accurately stated "Have your body absorb less calories than it burns and you will lose weight". However eating less calories than it burns pretty much guarrantees that.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on May 15, 2014, 07:43:33 AM
This is also partly why eating many smaller meals helps with weightloss - your body never exits absorption mode so its not just burning more calories, but its less likely to try to squeeze extra calories out of the food you've already eaten.

Incidentally this is also a huge trap because it's really easy to eat way more than you're supposed to.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on May 15, 2014, 08:06:57 AM
Survival mode is not bullshit. Eating at a deficit is a good and necessary part of weight loss, but it's important to manage it carefully so that your body efficiently converts the fuel you use into the muscle you're building from exercise.

Cis and 19CVS are both right. Survival mode is not bullshit, but Calories are calories - just remember your body doesn't take in 100% of the calories you give it. When you body is in calorie deficit mode, it will absorb things at different rates than when its in surplus -when your body is running a deficit its more likely to try to get as much nutrition out of the food you feed it.

The Atkins takes advantage of this:  fats and proteins take more energy to absorb, so when there is a lack of 'easy' calories, like sugars and starches, your body will not absorb every calorie of protein and fat that passes through. Likewise the body of a goon is going to be less likely to try to squeeze every gram of protein out of its diet than someone getting swole.

This is also partly why eating many smaller meals helps with weightloss - your body never exits absorption mode so its not just burning more calories, but its less likely to try to squeeze extra calories out of the food you've already eaten. 
These are pretty slight differences, but over time they can add up.

tl;dr
"Eat less calories and you burn and you will lose weight" is more accurately stated "Have your body absorb less calories than it burns and you will lose weight". However eating less calories than it burns pretty much guarrantees that.

Not all calories are created equal though.  They're finding more and more evidence that 1 kcal of sugar is different than 1kcal of protein for example.

Bomb calorimetry is a dumb fucking way of measuring how a chemical engine like your body reacts to things.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on May 15, 2014, 10:44:52 AM
Despite decades of effort, nutrition is still barely a science because long-term testing is fucking hard.

It's fairly reasonable to consider that not all calories are created equally- complex carbs are better than simple carbs, unless the simple carbs are introduced immediately after a nice intense glycogen-depleting workout, for example. There are serious schools of thought examining how the gut microflora play into caloric absorption, etc.

That's why taking the more general approach is key and aiming for long term steady-rate weight loss. Find the pattern that works for good gradual loss, then cultivate the discipline it takes to stick to it. People have to set their short-term goals modestly and realize that this is a long (as in lifelong) game and be patient with it.

It takes time, research, thought, consideration, dedication, denial of immediate gratification.

Also, the way the body responds to caloric deficit is a reason that they now encourage cheat/victory/whatever days, and I've seen that sort of food patterning work first-hand. One day a week of just eating whatever helps to keep the body from thinking that it needs to go full conservation.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on May 15, 2014, 10:48:51 AM
I literally never cared about 'calories' or even looked into that, I just eat until I feel like I've had enough, minimize the amount of junk food and work out and I can keep myself fit just fine

I guess that's some form of :coolmad: privilege :coolmad:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on May 15, 2014, 11:29:55 AM
Not all calories are created equal though.  They're finding more and more evidence that 1 kcal of sugar is different than 1kcal of protein for example.

Bomb calorimetry is a dumb fucking way of measuring how a chemical engine like your body reacts to things.

1 kcal of glucose requires almost no effort by your body to uptake, its pretty much directly absorbed.

Now, and I might not the specifics right since its been a few years since I took my nutrition science class.
Complex carbs are almost directly absorbed, but require additional processing to be broken down into glucose - the net gain of complex carbs is greater than simple carbs, but you have put in energy to get it out.

Protein and especially fat require a fair bit more processing to be ready for use in your gut. I can't remember the exact processes, so assume lots of iircs pepper through this. I can't remember what it is for Protien, but most lipids (fats) have to be transported through the walls of the intestinal cells. This requires 2 ATP to move a molecule that when 'burned' for energy gives off upto 9 ATP.

If your body is in ketosis, like in a low carb diet, your body has a general lack of ATP and seems to opt not absorb every fat molecule its able. Conversely when you've got a lot of simple sugars mixed in with that fat, the body generally opts to use the ATP from simple sugars to drive the process to absorb the fat.

the tl;dr of this is that even if you're using raw "how well does it burn?" calorie number, if you know your BMR + how much energy you burn during the day, and consume less than in calories, you are guaranteed to have a reduction in fat, if not in weight.
This might trigger a BMR reduction, and its important to do something, like excercise, to keep your BMR from falling or compensate with further calorie reduction.


Despite decades of effort, nutrition is still barely a science because long-term testing is fucking hard.

It's fairly reasonable to consider that not all calories are created equally- complex carbs are better than simple carbs, unless the simple carbs are introduced immediately after a nice intense glycogen-depleting workout, for example. There are serious schools of thought examining how the gut microflora play into caloric absorption, etc.

That's why taking the more general approach is key and aiming for long term steady-rate weight loss. Find the pattern that works for good gradual loss, then cultivate the discipline it takes to stick to it. People have to set their short-term goals modestly and realize that this is a long (as in lifelong) game and be patient with it.

It takes time, research, thought, consideration, dedication, denial of immediate gratification.

Also, the way the body responds to caloric deficit is a reason that they now encourage cheat/victory/whatever days, and I've seen that sort of food patterning work first-hand. One day a week of just eating whatever helps to keep the body from thinking that it needs to go full conservation.

Cheat days are more psychological than physiological. The physiological side is, firstly, that unless you are literally starving* (i don't just mean running a calorie deficit, like serious long term cannibalizing skeletal muscle because there is nothing left starvation), your body tends to largely ignore occasional calorie spikes. This is why you can eat 3 servings of thanksgiving dinner, plus pie and a midnight snack of leftovers and not literally gain three pounds once you take your shit post-turkey shit - your body will take up more calories than normal simply because they are there and a fair number are low hanging fruit, but it won't take up literally 100% of them.
Why people usually gain 5+ lbs over the holidays is because between travel, stress, and the longer term availability of excess food, its usually not just a one day glut.

The second is that if your body is lacking something, an essential amino acid or nutrients, your body (provided it has the ATP on tap) is going to dig through your shit harder to try to find it, and usually when its digging what it finds is just more calories. Cheat days increase the nutritional variety in your diet, meaning your body is less likely to be lacking in something it needs.



*the semi exception to this if you are in a low carb diet and take up a lot of carbs, especially simple carbs, because this has a possibility of knocking your body out of ketosis. This can make your body uptake calories it would otherwise not, meaning you'll suck up more calories for a few hours to a day or two. But if you're in Ketosis your body is essentially staving.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on May 27, 2014, 06:10:47 PM
Sorry to interrupt Carbtalk but I thought I'd chime in

I've loved The Onion for like 20 years but I'm putting them on Poz Threat Level Orange

College Rape Victim Pretty Thrilled She Gets To Recount Assault To Faculty Committee (http://www.theonion.com/articles/college-rape-victim-pretty-thrilled-she-gets-to-re,36129/)

New STEM Education Initiative Inspires Girls To Earn Less Than Men In Scientific Career (http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-stem-education-initiative-inspires-girls-to-ea,36126/)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: VFW on May 27, 2014, 07:29:22 PM
Sorry to interrupt Carbtalk but I thought I'd chime in

I've loved The Onion for like 20 years but I'm putting them on Poz Threat Level Orange

College Rape Victim Pretty Thrilled She Gets To Recount Assault To Faculty Committee (http://www.theonion.com/articles/college-rape-victim-pretty-thrilled-she-gets-to-re,36129/)

New STEM Education Initiative Inspires Girls To Earn Less Than Men In Scientific Career (http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-stem-education-initiative-inspires-girls-to-ea,36126/)

All comedy is basically going full poz since young people are weaklings and need to have their BS leftist ideology constantly reaffirmed by idiots.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on May 27, 2014, 10:27:40 PM
The Onion has pulled a lot of that shit in the past.  It's pretty much a site for shitlibs to say "WOW, THE GOP NOW SOUNDS LIKE THE ONION!!!"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on May 27, 2014, 10:39:56 PM
The Onion has been leaning towards the tumblr direction since around 2010 or so.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Autistic Yankee on May 27, 2014, 11:10:05 PM
Yeah could you imagine them printing this article today?  :allears:

http://www.theonion.com/articles/marxists-apartment-a-microcosm-of-why-marxism-does,1382/
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on May 28, 2014, 01:31:31 AM
Yeah could you imagine them printing this article today?  :allears:

http://www.theonion.com/articles/marxists-apartment-a-microcosm-of-why-marxism-does,1382/
http://www.theonion.com/articles/gaypride-parade-sets-mainstream-acceptance-of-gays,351/

2001 was a very different age............
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: armchair nazi on May 28, 2014, 11:52:49 AM
daily show back when kilborn was doing it used to be the same way. this was the hollywood guy's take on the ellen show being nominated for an emmy: "ellen degeneris is up for best actress in a comedy series, proving the old showbiz maxim that if you take a barely funny sitcom, remove the humor, and make it your own personal soapbox, people will feel guilty enough to nominate you for a prize"

i'm pretty sure you would be removed from the media for saying that now.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on June 03, 2014, 11:22:50 AM
I read the title, decided this was appropriate to post here, and then closed the article.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-uncomfortable-truths-behind-mens-rights-movement/
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on June 03, 2014, 11:25:59 AM
The writer actually did a pretty good job at brainwashing his audience into believing what he said 100%. Most of his quotes come from the RedPill subreddit which is actually largely takes an anti-MRA stance and he also links PUAs to the MRA community. Basically what SJWs do all the time, try to fool people (and themselves) into thinking MRAs are a serious, big, dangerous group by extending the definition of "MRA" to mean "any man that makes me LITERALLY SHAKE".

I'm no MRA supporter but fuck if this isn't a perfect example of emotion-appeal SJW propaganda. It's actually kinda creepy how effective it is even on a supposed 'comedy website'.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on June 03, 2014, 11:45:05 AM
The onion used to have a pretty goddamn good edge to it.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/columbine-jocks-safely-resume-bullying,661/
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on June 03, 2014, 11:49:32 AM
The onion used to have a pretty goddamn good edge to it.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/columbine-jocks-safely-resume-bullying,661/

They used to be really damned good.  I like this one:

http://www.theonion.com/articles/im-like-a-chocoholic-but-for-booze,10739/
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Sum Beezy on June 03, 2014, 01:11:01 PM
I read the title, decided this was appropriate to post here, and then closed the article.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-uncomfortable-truths-behind-mens-rights-movement/

Quote
I'm not saying that every MRA is on the verge of killing people or even a bad person, because I'm kind of a doofy idealist and I think "bad people" are way more rare than that. But I do think anger is a dangerous emotion. And I know that if you spend all day on the internet trying to make that anger feel justified and righteous, something important inside you will start to rot away.

 :allears:

But see, when we're outraged over the latest videogame/movie/tv show, or an offensive joke we overheard that one time, it's okay because
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on June 03, 2014, 05:57:58 PM
My favorite onion article: http://www.theonion.com/articles/school-bully-not-so-tough-since-being-molested,8848/
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on June 03, 2014, 08:46:51 PM
their Joe Biden shit is hilarious
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Black Gardener on June 04, 2014, 05:14:53 AM
their Joe Biden shit is hilarious

Co-signed.  Pick up The President of Vice on Kindle, you won't regret it.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on June 08, 2014, 04:00:01 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/OCojfUy.jpg)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Black Gardener on June 09, 2014, 09:00:00 AM
Obsession with genitals is a hell of a drug.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on June 09, 2014, 09:48:05 AM
At least they don't lie and say they are a humor site.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on June 09, 2014, 10:32:09 AM
(http://i.imgur.com/FRzqRlf.jpg)

(http://i.imgur.com/3cC1d7x.jpg)

from infuriating statistics photoshop contest

good job missing the forest for the trees cracked :rolleyes:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on June 09, 2014, 10:41:39 AM
lol they skipped the "criminals" chart
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on June 09, 2014, 08:22:49 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/OCojfUy.jpg)

Is that completely unedited? Because if so holy shit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on June 09, 2014, 11:33:02 PM
No, they took all the sjw articles and lumped them in one image. Still shameful though.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on June 15, 2014, 05:21:53 PM
Well, at least The Onion isn't totally lost. They launched a new site called Clickhole (http://www.clickhole.com/) that's a parody of shitty sites like Buzzfeed and Cracked.

They've got blog posts like "I’m Not Saying I Hope My Child Is Transgender, But I Would Hit It Out Of The Park" and "It’s Time To Publicly Execute Ronald McDonald." :allears:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on June 15, 2014, 06:47:50 PM
That site is p funny but it's so on the nose I think the vast majority of the Internet will think it's real.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: armchair nazi on June 15, 2014, 11:13:13 PM
Well, at least The Onion isn't totally lost. They launched a new site called Clickhole (http://www.clickhole.com/) that's a parody of shitty sites like Buzzfeed and Cracked.

They've got blog posts like "I’m Not Saying I Hope My Child Is Transgender, But I Would Hit It Out Of The Park" and "It’s Time To Publicly Execute Ronald McDonald." :allears:

holy shit, reading clickhole feels like reading the onion from 2002. i didn't know they could still be funny.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on June 15, 2014, 11:28:21 PM
Don't worry, Gawker, Slate, or The Atlantic will write a bunch of screeds about how problematic Clickhole is and The Onion will fall in line.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Black Gardener on June 16, 2014, 12:01:18 AM
You wasn't kiddin'!

http://www.clickhole.com/blogpost/only-way-us-move-country-forward-all-americans-sit-253
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on June 16, 2014, 12:25:42 AM
please, shallowly funny clickbait list site whose articles never get deeper than 10 WAYS INDIANA JONES TOTALLY BEAT DARTH VADER IN A DUEL WITH ROOSEVELT MOOSE HANDS XD, tell me how america can best go about changing itself.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on June 16, 2014, 12:29:38 AM
please, shallowly funny clickbait list site whose articles never get deeper than 10 WAYS INDIANA JONES TOTALLY BEAT DARTH VADER IN A DUEL WITH ROOSEVELT MOOSE HANDS XD, tell me how america can best go about changing itself.
:facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

That site is p funny but it's so on the nose I think the vast majority of the Internet will think it's real.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on June 16, 2014, 12:41:30 AM
realtalk though every buzzfeed article is some inane combination of wacky tumblr gifs, NETFLIX!, PIZZA!!!, EATING PIZZA WHILE WATCHING NETFLIX!!!!, and gay gen y shit like 21 OF THE MOST BAFFLING CELEBRITY TWEETS.  :facepalm:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Black Gardener on June 16, 2014, 01:02:33 AM
please, shallowly funny clickbait list site whose articles never get deeper than 10 WAYS INDIANA JONES TOTALLY BEAT DARTH VADER IN A DUEL WITH ROOSEVELT MOOSE HANDS XD, tell me how america can best go about changing itself.

C'mon, CK, you're better than this.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on June 16, 2014, 01:14:51 AM
i fucking know clickhole is satire, i'm talking about the people who take that kind of shit from CRACKED seriously.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: neat on June 16, 2014, 01:15:41 AM
please, shallowly funny clickbait list site whose articles never get deeper than 10 WAYS INDIANA JONES TOTALLY BEAT DARTH VADER IN A DUEL WITH ROOSEVELT MOOSE HANDS XD, tell me how america can best go about changing itself.

C'mon, CK, you're better than this.

No. No she isn't.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Black Gardener on June 16, 2014, 01:24:36 AM
please, shallowly funny clickbait list site whose articles never get deeper than 10 WAYS INDIANA JONES TOTALLY BEAT DARTH VADER IN A DUEL WITH ROOSEVELT MOOSE HANDS XD, tell me how america can best go about changing itself.

C'mon, CK, you're better than this.

No. No she isn't.

Well excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me, princess! :eminem:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on June 16, 2014, 04:59:37 AM
Well, at least The Onion isn't totally lost. They launched a new site called Clickhole (http://www.clickhole.com/) that's a parody of shitty sites like Buzzfeed and Cracked.

They've got blog posts like "I’m Not Saying I Hope My Child Is Transgender, But I Would Hit It Out Of The Park" and "It’s Time To Publicly Execute Ronald McDonald." :allears:

I'm calling the Clickhole is closed in 6 months when they realize their parody is indistinguishable from the the thing they are mocking.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on June 16, 2014, 07:21:32 AM
i fucking know clickhole is satire, i'm talking about the people who take that kind of shit from CRACKED seriously.

People do. It's really depressing. When I was growing up Cracked was a comic book for ten year olds, now it's a masturbatory aid for people who want to feel smart and progressive without reading real articles in real magazines for adults. Kids in college who think they know jack shit about anything will actually cite Cracked in conversation.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on June 16, 2014, 10:47:34 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/12-video-game-annoyances-that-need-to-die-part-2_p3/

1/2 SJW, 1/2 whine, all poz
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Rapper on June 16, 2014, 11:19:47 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/12-video-game-annoyances-that-need-to-die-part-2_p3/

1/2 SJW, 1/2 whine, all poz

Stop giving us choices and features that don't matter. Start focusing on the important moral decisions like the characters Gender and Otherkin spirit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: New Feminist Jihad on June 16, 2014, 12:44:19 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/12-video-game-annoyances-that-need-to-die-part-2_p3/

1/2 SJW, 1/2 whine, all poz

Stop giving us choices and features that don't matter. Start focusing on the important moral decisions like the characters Gender and Otherkin spirit.
I read that as "genderkin" and realized it's a better name for the Transgender illness.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on June 16, 2014, 01:40:54 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/12-video-game-annoyances-that-need-to-die-part-2_p3/

1/2 SJW, 1/2 whine, all poz

It took me a few paragraphs to check the URL and see it wasn't a Clickhole parody.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: deceased negroid depot on June 16, 2014, 01:50:28 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/12-video-game-annoyances-that-need-to-die-part-2_p3/

1/2 SJW, 1/2 whine, all poz
A lot of those amount to "why aren't video games a perfect simulation of the real life I'm not living?"

(http://i.imgur.com/F3lTUa6.png)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on June 16, 2014, 02:54:12 PM
Watching this video nearly made me have a panic attack. Fuck the modern culture of sexist, racist, cissexist, ableist gamers, fuck the sexist, racist, cissexist and ableist industry that gave birth to said toxic culture, and above all else, fuck this patriarchal oppressive bullshit that surrounds us everywhere. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6vR8EHatIIE
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on June 16, 2014, 04:06:59 PM
Ubisoft's mistake was engaging this argument at all. The game will sell absurdly well regardless of what they've done, putting out these dumb excuses does nothing but give the "twitter-verse" some more fodder for a couple of days until this all blows over and they get upset about GTV VI's portrayal of Hong Kong gangsters or something.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on June 16, 2014, 04:25:22 PM
Hideki Kamiya (Devil May Cry 1, Bayonetta, Viewtiful Joe, Okami, etc) has openly said that he doesn't give a fuck about Anita Sarkeesian or people thinking his games are sexist. David Jaffe (Twisted Metal, God of War 1) has made outright negative comments about Anita's videos on Twitter. Edmund McMillen, the guy who made Super Meat Boy, doesn't have as much money or as many industry connections as the other two and yet he wrote a big Tumblr post about how the website's social justice culture is bad and how it tends to promote the concept of 'justified hatred against the right groups' under the guise of helping disadvantaged groups.

I don't really buy that industry people aren't allowed to have an opinion on this stuff beyond "yes we're sorry for being huge bigots, we shall accept the love of Feminist Frequency in our hearts and wash away our original privilege".
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on June 16, 2014, 06:16:00 PM
Noone has every adequately explained why its so bad for a videogame series to cater to its core audience, that is, men.

You don't see me going to Romance novel conventions demanding they change to suit my personal tastes. If there aren't enough women in video games maybe some women should go make video games for women. (http://www.newzoo.com/insights/supercell-vs-king-how-do-their-gamers-compare/)

They say the industry is full of men who cater to men.

 :adam: Its almost as if the vast majority of developers and players of videogames for the past 30+ years have been men...  Why would they want to market directly to this core audience? Don't they know the only reason women don't line up to buy the 120 dollar Halo Collector's Edition is because Master Chief isn't a woman?!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Black Gardener on June 16, 2014, 07:59:13 PM
People will buy what they are told to buy.  Simple as that.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on June 16, 2014, 11:04:05 PM
Being a gamer is now an identity instead of something to be ashamed of.  I remember even back in my college days a decade ago I had to hide the video games I had if I was going to have a girl over and there was a chance that she was going to touch my penis.  Maybe it was okay to have a sports game or two but when your collection was a bunch of Japacrap for your PlayStation 2, you had to get that shit out of sight.

I think a big part of this issue is that there are now a lot of people who have spent their entire lives playing video games.  As a kid, it was ok.  As a teenager, I guess that is fine but it was assumed you'd put the controller down if you were going to get some pink stink.  In college, maybe for a pregame before going to a house party.  As a college graduate, no.  As a 35 year old man who still wears T-shirts with Atari paddles with the caption "KNOW YOUR ROOTS", hell no.  Most of this gaming activist set are people in the latter two categories: it's easier to say that you're a gamer if you're just not interested in games themselves but the industry in general.  Furthermore, it is even more okay if you present yourself as some kind of activist for women or gays or trannies in games.  Otherwise you're just some fucking loser spending weekends you will never get back on DOTA raids.  With this activism is a strong undercurrent of shame.

Even if women were even marginally appreciative of this "activism", who the fuck are these clowns impressing?  Anita Sarkeesian basically conned a bunch of suckers by putting out a couple of shitty Youtubes with little more content than just reading from TVTropes.  She has pocketed the couple hundred thousand dollars that remained.  That's not bad work: a few shitty Youtubes, buying a few thousand dollars worth of games, and keeping the excess $200,000+.  I don't think most if any women are impressed that gamer goons are mad that a character has huge titties.  Most of them don't give a shit because they have other things going on in their lives.  I bet the number of times gamer goons have had sex with women who appreciate their activism can be counted on one hand, with fingers remaining.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on June 17, 2014, 02:27:19 AM
I like to play video games when I'm in the mood for it but if you ever call me a gamer you're a goddamned faggot.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Black Gardener on June 17, 2014, 02:39:12 AM
The only thing anyone is calling you is "never late for lunch."
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on June 17, 2014, 02:54:21 AM
The only thing anyone is calling you is "never late for lunch."

I do the cooking, how could I be late?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on June 17, 2014, 03:09:55 AM
Being a gamer is now an identity instead of something to be ashamed of.  I remember even back in my college days a decade ago I had to hide the video games I had if I was going to have a girl over and there was a chance that she was going to touch my penis.  Maybe it was okay to have a sports game or two but when your collection was a bunch of Japacrap for your PlayStation 2, you had to get that shit out of sight.

I think a big part of this issue is that there are now a lot of people who have spent their entire lives playing video games.  As a kid, it was ok.  As a teenager, I guess that is fine but it was assumed you'd put the controller down if you were going to get some pink stink.  In college, maybe for a pregame before going to a house party.  As a college graduate, no.  As a 35 year old man who still wears T-shirts with Atari paddles with the caption "KNOW YOUR ROOTS", hell no.  Most of this gaming activist set are people in the latter two categories: it's easier to say that you're a gamer if you're just not interested in games themselves but the industry in general.  Furthermore, it is even more okay if you present yourself as some kind of activist for women or gays or trannies in games.  Otherwise you're just some fucking loser spending weekends you will never get back on DOTA raids.  With this activism is a strong undercurrent of shame.

Even if women were even marginally appreciative of this "activism", who the fuck are these clowns impressing?  Anita Sarkeesian basically conned a bunch of suckers by putting out a couple of shitty Youtubes with little more content than just reading from TVTropes.  She has pocketed the couple hundred thousand dollars that remained.  That's not bad work: a few shitty Youtubes, buying a few thousand dollars worth of games, and keeping the excess $200,000+.  I don't think most if any women are impressed that gamer goons are mad that a character has huge titties.  Most of them don't give a shit because they have other things going on in their lives.  I bet the number of times gamer goons have had sex with women who appreciate their activism can be counted on one hand, with fingers remaining.

I imagine I'm in the minority of women in that seeing your games (Japacrap can't be H games or Somethingawful CP shit) wouldn't turn me away outright, just because I play so many myself, but they would be a huge warning sign.

Exactly like what you said though. I thought it was cool when my dude was able to say, 'yeah, female character designs and shit can be incredibly cringe worthy and over the top, especially as an adult playing this shit,' but that was the extent of it, from both sides. Wow, these character designs are dumb and cringe worthy. End of that discussion. Had it gone any further than that I would have suggested taking some time in the real world and looking at issues that actually affect real life women instead of your stupid fucking waifu that we all know you masturbate to anyway.

Turns out Lulu from FFX doesn't trigger me when sex trafficking is alive and well all over the world. Her stupid design goes away as soon as the playstation is shut off dude, maybe you should try pressing the bright red button for once.

Like Jesus (http://christaylor.8bitx.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/kuja1.jpg)

considering that is a fucking dude character designs in video games are pretty fucking stupid and over the top, it's a given you pathetic manchildren. go help actual women if you care that fucking much about our image in the eyes of humanity.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on June 17, 2014, 07:11:22 AM
I mean, I have the new Nintendo. I play a scattered game of Donkey Kong or Mario Kart, but I would be embarrassed as shit if someone walked into my house and I was sitting down playing this unfolding super serious melodrama design to milk faggot gamer tears like Final Fantasy or some shit. Games are fun, they can help you unwind after a long day, but games are toys. When you take them more serious than that, you are a weirdo. When you bitch about games "Refusing to Tell Serious Stories" like in that Cracked article, you are basically mad because no one takes your toys serious enough.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on June 17, 2014, 11:05:54 AM
So...I'm guessing that there's actually money to be make from games tailor made for autistic faggots and shrill SJWs. It's a niche market, but from what I'm hearing it is possible to squeeze money from these retards, and a lot of it.

If I had any programming abilities at all, I'd try to come up with some game where the player choices are all trannies, otherkin, or Swedes. Maybe one of the game storylines is where you get to fight against the Front National in France and open the floodgates for niggers and Muslims.

Hey, how about another storyline where our otherkin heroes go on a quest to obtain the lost teachings of Islam? You know, they discover that Islam was once tolerant and accepting of faggots and trannies, but these highly progressive tenets were removed and forgotten due to the actions of homophobic Crusaders and later European Imperialists. We discover that Avicenna pioneered the first successful SRS, and that the Umayyad Caliphs had medical coverage for everyone including hormones.

And storyline #3: our heroes set the record straight on Joe Stalin and expose the hoax of the Holodomor and the fictitious "purges."

What do you guys think?

Fuck, maybe I could come up with a cartoon...
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on June 17, 2014, 11:33:54 AM
I like to play video games when I'm in the mood for it but if you ever call me a gamer you're a goddamned faggot.

99 reasons to call you a faggot but being a gamer aint one
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on June 17, 2014, 12:33:35 PM
Being a gamer is now an identity instead of something to be ashamed of.

If what kind of media you consume (movies, TV, games, books) is a primary bullet point when you answer the question "tell me about yourself" then you've failed at life.

Anyone over ~14 who identifies as "I'm a Gamer!" is a worthless piece of shit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on June 17, 2014, 03:58:50 PM
Being a gamer is now an identity instead of something to be ashamed of.

If what kind of media you consume (movies, TV, games, books) is a primary bullet point when you answer the question "tell me about yourself" then you've failed at life.

Anyone over ~14 who identifies as "I'm a Gamer!" is a worthless piece of shit.

If you life revolves around the video game industry and you are over 14 you are a faggot.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Autistic Yankee on June 17, 2014, 06:57:23 PM
Honestly, if you life revolves around one single thing only then you are kind of a faggot. 

 :bronson: "So... tell me about yourself?"

 :unparsons:"Ok!  First and foremost, I am a ________.  That is what I identify as."


Like, there is not a whole lot you could put in there that isn't pretty pathetic.  Democrat, Republican, Born Again Christian, Movie Buff, Civil War Reenactor, Gamer, Cyclist, Competitive Eater, NY Yankees Fan, Dog Lover.

What can you put in ______ that doesn't make you sound like a faggot?  Don't fucking join a team and have that team be your identity.  That's stupid as hell. 

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on June 18, 2014, 10:39:10 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-deviant-sex-acts-that-science-says-are-good-you/

BDSM is good for your psychological health.

Polyamory builds stronger relationships.

It's true, because Science.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on June 18, 2014, 11:36:04 AM
Quote
Science says that polyamorous relationships are the best kind, but why would I trust Science? He's just the guy who hangs out behind the 7-Eleven near my house and sells me experimental bear tranquilizers. He says all kinds of crazy shit. So I did some research and discovered that Science is, perhaps coincidentally, totally right. The reasoning is pretty simple: Because both parties are out there sowing their wild oats, or having wild oats ... sown in them (I'm not sure what the female version of the euphemism is), communication becomes even more necessary.

For example: Polyamorous Charlie will say, "Hey, I like to fuck all the time, but sometimes you're at work or whatever, so how about I fuck other people?" and then Polyamorous Ashley is all, "Hey that's cool, dawg," because that's how they all talk. Bam. Communication. And as we all know, communication is the most important part of a relationship.

According to Science.

I like how they cite an interview on a click bait science blog with this woman. (http://elisabethsheff.com/)

Quote
One of a handful of global experts on polyamory and the foremost international expert on children in polyamorous families, Dr. Elisabeth Sheff is an educational consultant and expert witness serving sexual and gender minorities. She is author of the book The Polyamorists Next Door: Inside Multiple-Partner Relationships and Families as well as numerous academic and legal articles pertaining to polyamory, gender, families, and sexual minorities. Sheff has given more than 20 radio, podcast, print, and television interviews with sources from Radio Slovenia to National Public Radio, the Sunday London Times to the Boston Globe and Newsweek, CNN to National Geographic Television.

By emphasizing research methodology and findings in her presentations, Dr. Sheff offers the kind of public intellectualism that encourages audience members to think critically about gender, sexualities, and families.  Sheff’s research explains the unique strategies polyamorists use in navigating their complex family lives and describes how they could prove tremendously useful for people in monogamous relationships, as well as other gender and sexual minorities like kinksters (people who participate in BDSM/sadomasochism) and people on the transgender spectrum.  Dr. Sheff can effectively translate research findings into accurate legal and social representation for families of sexual and gender minorities.

Dr. Elisabeth Sheff lives in Atlanta with her girlfriend, their children, dog, cats, and the small wild animals the cats bring in.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Carbpoole on June 18, 2014, 12:47:01 PM
So...I'm guessing that there's actually money to be make from games tailor made for autistic faggots and shrill SJWs. It's a niche market, but from what I'm hearing it is possible to squeeze money from these retards, and a lot of it.

If I had any programming abilities at all, I'd try to come up with some game where the player choices are all trannies, otherkin, or Swedes. Maybe one of the game storylines is where you get to fight against the Front National in France and open the floodgates for niggers and Muslims.

Hey, how about another storyline where our otherkin heroes go on a quest to obtain the lost teachings of Islam? You know, they discover that Islam was once tolerant and accepting of faggots and trannies, but these highly progressive tenets were removed and forgotten due to the actions of homophobic Crusaders and later European Imperialists. We discover that Avicenna pioneered the first successful SRS, and that the Umayyad Caliphs had medical coverage for everyone including hormones.

And storyline #3: our heroes set the record straight on Joe Stalin and expose the hoax of the Holodomor and the fictitious "purges."

What do you guys think?

Fuck, maybe I could come up with a cartoon...

If anyone did that, they'd wring their hands and talk about money being tight right now, but that they'll signal boost your game/kickstarter. Then they'll go and buy the latest popular game and rage about how sexist/transphobic/shit it is while sinking hundreds of hours into it.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: tender of the rape garden on June 18, 2014, 05:01:05 PM
I mean, I have the new Nintendo. I play a scattered game of Donkey Kong or Mario Kart, but I would be embarrassed as shit if someone walked into my house and I was sitting down playing this unfolding super serious melodrama design to milk faggot gamer tears like Final Fantasy or some shit. Games are fun, they can help you unwind after a long day, but games are toys. When you take them more serious than that, you are a weirdo. When you bitch about games "Refusing to Tell Serious Stories" like in that Cracked article, you are basically mad because no one takes your toys serious enough.

That's precisely it - this kind of shit is coming from idiots who don't understand art, don't understand stories, don't understand adulthood, and most of all don't understand fucking video games.

So you get shitlords like David Wong complaining about games "refusing to tell serious stories" (if you want serious stories, watch a movie or read a fucking book) or having elements that "break immersion" (such a big deal to Wong that his fagotty ass has six entries out of twelve across the two articles touching upon it).

And yet, despite grumbling that video games haven't "matured" to match his adult tastes, he has the nerve to complain about "Social Gaming Bullshit Instead of Real-Life Multiplayer on the Sofa" which is one of the biggest accommodations to adulthood.  I mean sure, local multiplayer is a nice thing to have, but it's basically a feature for kids.  Most adults don't have the luxury of being able to have their friends come over when we want to play (because most of us don't have friends who are socially-retarded alcoholic manchildren who work as hack writers for click-bait websites).  And even if social elements can sometimes be intrusive, it's not like there's a shortage of purely single-player games out there... it's almost as if there's more to games than just what's shown at the E3 press conferences.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on June 18, 2014, 05:14:12 PM
I mean, I have the new Nintendo. I play a scattered game of Donkey Kong or Mario Kart, but I would be embarrassed as shit if someone walked into my house and I was sitting down playing this unfolding super serious melodrama design to milk faggot gamer tears like Final Fantasy or some shit. Games are fun, they can help you unwind after a long day, but games are toys. When you take them more serious than that, you are a weirdo. When you bitch about games "Refusing to Tell Serious Stories" like in that Cracked article, you are basically mad because no one takes your toys serious enough.

"I play video games that look like this http://i.imgur.com/Gu1hduY.jpg but if you play this OTHER sort of video game you're a big faggot and should be embarrassed of yourself"

lol arbitrary nerd hierarchies lol
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: White Power Superhero on June 18, 2014, 06:49:43 PM
im mad because spongebob hasnt matured to my adult tastes

how about some episodes where mr crabs goes to the seajew for a loan and the seajew gets put in jail for usury
or an episode where pearly comes out as gay
or what about an episode where spongebob kills patrick for sleeping with his wife
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Jack Ruby on June 18, 2014, 07:08:29 PM
David Wong has just godawful opinions about vidya games, and he has for years. He wrote some bullshit about how fun it would be to have a game where the protagonist talked back to you, the player, and wouldn't do what you told him to. Shockingly, this did not kick off a new genre in the form of "third person shooter where you can't control your third person."

Basically, his thoughts on this (amazingly unimportant) bullcrap are the opposite of Erik Wolpaw's, and therefore he's wrong (http://www.oldmanmurray.com/longreviews/46.html).

Quote
What is with this "thinking man" crap?  People willl put "thinking man" in front of fucking anything as if those words magically makes it better.   All it means is that the fun's been replaced with a spreadsheet.  Every goddamn boring thing I do all day is the thinking man's something or other.  From the moment I brew my first cup of the thinking man's coffee, tea, to the moment I try desperately to fall asleep while thinking about how I hope to God they don't repossess my car tonight, all I do all fucking day is think.  And now my head's tired.
...
When will somebody make the action man's chess?  On second thought, that sounds too complicated.  I want to play the action man's Robotron - a game like Robotron but with much less thinking.

Stop worrying that your mindless hobby isn't a faggoty art form, Wong.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on June 19, 2014, 04:28:27 AM
David Wong has just godawful opinions about vidya games, and he has for years. He wrote some bullshit about how fun it would be to have a game where the protagonist talked back to you, the player, and wouldn't do what you told him to. Shockingly, this did not kick off a new genre in the form of "third person shooter where you can't control your third person."

Basically, his thoughts on this (amazingly unimportant) bullcrap are the opposite of Erik Wolpaw's, and therefore he's wrong (http://www.oldmanmurray.com/longreviews/46.html).

Quote
What is with this "thinking man" crap?  People willl put "thinking man" in front of fucking anything as if those words magically makes it better.   All it means is that the fun's been replaced with a spreadsheet.  Every goddamn boring thing I do all day is the thinking man's something or other.  From the moment I brew my first cup of the thinking man's coffee, tea, to the moment I try desperately to fall asleep while thinking about how I hope to God they don't repossess my car tonight, all I do all fucking day is think.  And now my head's tired.
...
When will somebody make the action man's chess?  On second thought, that sounds too complicated.  I want to play the action man's Robotron - a game like Robotron but with much less thinking.

Stop worrying that your mindless hobby isn't a faggoty art form, Wong.
To be honest, that sounds tongue-in-cheek, and is also 14 years old. After doing writing for Psychonauts, Half Life and Portal and spending so much time in the industry I could see him developing a different stance.

Dude seems totally unpretentious when it comes to games though. He unironically praised MISOGYNIST, NON-ART game God Hand and the initial reaction of his pseudo-intellectual Valve following was to assume he was being sarcastic.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Jack Ruby on June 19, 2014, 08:54:58 AM
To be honest, that sounds tongue-in-cheek, and is also 14 years old. After doing writing for Psychonauts, Half Life and Portal and spending so much time in the industry I could see him developing a different stance.

Dude seems totally unpretentious when it comes to games though. He unironically praised MISOGYNIST, NON-ART game God Hand and the initial reaction of his pseudo-intellectual Valve following was to assume he was being sarcastic.
I disagree. Wolpaw's always been focused on playability. It's not that story doesn't matter, it's just that it should never, ever interfere with you having fun. That attitude's carried over to his Valve work - he's quick to point out that play-testing is far more important than jokes.

Meanwhile, Wong's sick of games that interrupt their heart-wrenching cutscenes by making him shoot bad guys. I'm surprised he didn't mention Gone Home. Seems like it would be right up his alley.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on June 19, 2014, 09:40:46 AM
Quote
Science says that polyamorous relationships are the best kind, but why would I trust Science? He's just the guy who hangs out behind the 7-Eleven near my house and sells me experimental bear tranquilizers. He says all kinds of crazy shit. So I did some research and discovered that Science is, perhaps coincidentally, totally right. The reasoning is pretty simple: Because both parties are out there sowing their wild oats, or having wild oats ... sown in them (I'm not sure what the female version of the euphemism is), communication becomes even more necessary.

For example: Polyamorous Charlie will say, "Hey, I like to fuck all the time, but sometimes you're at work or whatever, so how about I fuck other people?" and then Polyamorous Ashley is all, "Hey that's cool, dawg," because that's how they all talk. Bam. Communication. And as we all know, communication is the most important part of a relationship.

According to Science.

I like how they cite an interview on a click bait science blog with this woman. (http://elisabethsheff.com/)

Quote
One of a handful of global experts on polyamory and the foremost international expert on children in polyamorous families, Dr. Elisabeth Sheff is an educational consultant and expert witness serving sexual and gender minorities. She is author of the book The Polyamorists Next Door: Inside Multiple-Partner Relationships and Families as well as numerous academic and legal articles pertaining to polyamory, gender, families, and sexual minorities. Sheff has given more than 20 radio, podcast, print, and television interviews with sources from Radio Slovenia to National Public Radio, the Sunday London Times to the Boston Globe and Newsweek, CNN to National Geographic Television.

By emphasizing research methodology and findings in her presentations, Dr. Sheff offers the kind of public intellectualism that encourages audience members to think critically about gender, sexualities, and families.  Sheff’s research explains the unique strategies polyamorists use in navigating their complex family lives and describes how they could prove tremendously useful for people in monogamous relationships, as well as other gender and sexual minorities like kinksters (people who participate in BDSM/sadomasochism) and people on the transgender spectrum.  Dr. Sheff can effectively translate research findings into accurate legal and social representation for families of sexual and gender minorities.

Dr. Elisabeth Sheff lives in Atlanta with her girlfriend, their children, dog, cats, and the small wild animals the cats bring in.

Of course, this sort of woman is going to peddle the idea that this kinky shit is good, because all sexuality is good, except for pedophilia.

Seriously, is there any sexual practice that draws any condemnation these days other than pedophilia? I mean, I'm not white-knighting for pedos here, but that's pretty much the last taboo remaining.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on June 19, 2014, 09:41:27 AM
To be honest, that sounds tongue-in-cheek, and is also 14 years old. After doing writing for Psychonauts, Half Life and Portal and spending so much time in the industry I could see him developing a different stance.

Dude seems totally unpretentious when it comes to games though. He unironically praised MISOGYNIST, NON-ART game God Hand and the initial reaction of his pseudo-intellectual Valve following was to assume he was being sarcastic.
I disagree. Wolpaw's always been focused on playability. It's not that story doesn't matter, it's just that it should never, ever interfere with you having fun. That attitude's carried over to his Valve work - he's quick to point out that play-testing is far more important than jokes.

Meanwhile, Wong's sick of games that interrupt their heart-wrenching cutscenes by making him shoot bad guys. I'm surprised he didn't mention Gone Home. Seems like it would be right up his alley.
I just highly doubt he'd ever call Planescape: Torment or some other storyfag darling like that boring shit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Chael P Sonnen on June 19, 2014, 09:45:12 AM
Quote
Science says that polyamorous relationships are the best kind, but why would I trust Science? He's just the guy who hangs out behind the 7-Eleven near my house and sells me experimental bear tranquilizers. He says all kinds of crazy shit. So I did some research and discovered that Science is, perhaps coincidentally, totally right. The reasoning is pretty simple: Because both parties are out there sowing their wild oats, or having wild oats ... sown in them (I'm not sure what the female version of the euphemism is), communication becomes even more necessary.

For example: Polyamorous Charlie will say, "Hey, I like to fuck all the time, but sometimes you're at work or whatever, so how about I fuck other people?" and then Polyamorous Ashley is all, "Hey that's cool, dawg," because that's how they all talk. Bam. Communication. And as we all know, communication is the most important part of a relationship.

According to Science.

I like how they cite an interview on a click bait science blog with this woman. (http://elisabethsheff.com/)

Quote
One of a handful of global experts on polyamory and the foremost international expert on children in polyamorous families, Dr. Elisabeth Sheff is an educational consultant and expert witness serving sexual and gender minorities. She is author of the book The Polyamorists Next Door: Inside Multiple-Partner Relationships and Families as well as numerous academic and legal articles pertaining to polyamory, gender, families, and sexual minorities. Sheff has given more than 20 radio, podcast, print, and television interviews with sources from Radio Slovenia to National Public Radio, the Sunday London Times to the Boston Globe and Newsweek, CNN to National Geographic Television.

By emphasizing research methodology and findings in her presentations, Dr. Sheff offers the kind of public intellectualism that encourages audience members to think critically about gender, sexualities, and families.  Sheff’s research explains the unique strategies polyamorists use in navigating their complex family lives and describes how they could prove tremendously useful for people in monogamous relationships, as well as other gender and sexual minorities like kinksters (people who participate in BDSM/sadomasochism) and people on the transgender spectrum.  Dr. Sheff can effectively translate research findings into accurate legal and social representation for families of sexual and gender minorities.

Dr. Elisabeth Sheff lives in Atlanta with her girlfriend, their children, dog, cats, and the small wild animals the cats bring in.

Of course, this sort of woman is going to peddle the idea that this kinky shit is good, because all sexuality is good, except for pedophilia.

Seriously, is there any sexual practice that draws any condemnation these days other than pedophilia? I mean, I'm not white-knighting for pedos here, but that's pretty much the last taboo remaining.

Dog fucking maybe? Or have they accepted Mr Hands
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on June 19, 2014, 10:48:19 AM
I'm a firm believer in the positive effect good art can have on people. The 20s had Fitzgerald as its voice, the 50s - 60s had the Beatniks, then the hippies after that. As a generation our major cultural contribution is turning gender into a taxonomy. And pronouns. Even if the hippies were proto-gen Y at least most of the music that inspired them had substance.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on June 19, 2014, 11:13:51 AM
Like most, I'm glad John Cheese isn't my dad.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-pieces-advice-your-dad-gave-you-that-are-total-b.s./

Bubbacat Edit: Hit modify instead of reply.
:gapo:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: BubbaCat on June 19, 2014, 11:38:25 AM
Like most, I'm glad John Cheese isn't my dad.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-pieces-advice-your-dad-gave-you-that-are-total-b.s./


All of that advise is still very pertinent.  The author is either completely pozzed or 18 years old.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on June 19, 2014, 12:06:57 PM
I mean, I have the new Nintendo. I play a scattered game of Donkey Kong or Mario Kart, but I would be embarrassed as shit if someone walked into my house and I was sitting down playing this unfolding super serious melodrama design to milk faggot gamer tears like Final Fantasy or some shit. Games are fun, they can help you unwind after a long day, but games are toys. When you take them more serious than that, you are a weirdo. When you bitch about games "Refusing to Tell Serious Stories" like in that Cracked article, you are basically mad because no one takes your toys serious enough.

"I play video games that look like this http://i.imgur.com/Gu1hduY.jpg but if you play this OTHER sort of video game you're a big faggot and should be embarrassed of yourself"

lol arbitrary nerd hierarchies lol

I'm not trying to argue that any of this shit will get you laid. I'm just saying that one of these things is made by people who know they are making toys and one is made by fags who think they're making high art. At least I can play Mario Kart with my wife and kid.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on June 19, 2014, 03:38:23 PM
Seriously, is there any sexual practice that draws any condemnation these days other than pedophilia? I mean, I'm not white-knighting for pedos here, but that's pretty much the last taboo remaining.

Just wait.

We've seen how fast things went from "Just like you and me!" to what we've got now, and trannys are the hip new thing already, so I have little doubt we'll go down that particular alternative lifestyle rabbit hole when we come to it. Pedos were part of the sexual liberation movement for a while before they got the boot, but with our culture as damaged as it is now...
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: tender of the rape garden on June 19, 2014, 04:34:47 PM
To be honest, that sounds tongue-in-cheek, and is also 14 years old. After doing writing for Psychonauts, Half Life and Portal and spending so much time in the industry I could see him developing a different stance.

Dude seems totally unpretentious when it comes to games though. He unironically praised MISOGYNIST, NON-ART game God Hand and the initial reaction of his pseudo-intellectual Valve following was to assume he was being sarcastic.
I disagree. Wolpaw's always been focused on playability. It's not that story doesn't matter, it's just that it should never, ever interfere with you having fun. That attitude's carried over to his Valve work - he's quick to point out that play-testing is far more important than jokes.

Meanwhile, Wong's sick of games that interrupt their heart-wrenching cutscenes by making him shoot bad guys. I'm surprised he didn't mention Gone Home. Seems like it would be right up his alley.

This is what I mean by guys like Wong not getting art, story, or video games.

So he doesn't comprehend that the narrative in a video game is not the focal point, it's a framing device that gives context to the things you do in-game and the order in which you do them - which is why a lot of really good games can get away with having no story at all, and conversely why a lot of story-heavy games aren't actually very good as games.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on June 19, 2014, 04:41:20 PM
To be honest, that sounds tongue-in-cheek, and is also 14 years old. After doing writing for Psychonauts, Half Life and Portal and spending so much time in the industry I could see him developing a different stance.

Dude seems totally unpretentious when it comes to games though. He unironically praised MISOGYNIST, NON-ART game God Hand and the initial reaction of his pseudo-intellectual Valve following was to assume he was being sarcastic.
I disagree. Wolpaw's always been focused on playability. It's not that story doesn't matter, it's just that it should never, ever interfere with you having fun. That attitude's carried over to his Valve work - he's quick to point out that play-testing is far more important than jokes.

Meanwhile, Wong's sick of games that interrupt their heart-wrenching cutscenes by making him shoot bad guys. I'm surprised he didn't mention Gone Home. Seems like it would be right up his alley.

This is what I mean by guys like Wong not getting art, story, or video games.

So he doesn't comprehend that the narrative in a video game is not the focal point, it's a framing device that gives context to the things you do in-game and the order in which you do them - which is why a lot of really good games can get away with having no story at all, and conversely why a lot of story-heavy games aren't actually very good as games.
He actually made a point about this in one of his older articles, that the term "video games" covers a wide variety of different experiences and that 'interactive story' games aren't really 'games' in the truest sense.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: nerdball on June 19, 2014, 07:55:03 PM

Seriously, is there any sexual practice that draws any condemnation these days other than pedophilia? I mean, I'm not white-knighting for pedos here, but that's pretty much the last taboo remaining.

Outside of the online echo chamber, none of the tumblerkin kinks are in any way accepted in the majority of society. There's pozzed-out pockets in major metropolitan areas, people are still pretty in their right minds.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Carbpoole on June 19, 2014, 10:00:06 PM

Seriously, is there any sexual practice that draws any condemnation these days other than pedophilia? I mean, I'm not white-knighting for pedos here, but that's pretty much the last taboo remaining.

Outside of the online echo chamber, none of the tumblerkin kinks are in any way accepted in the majority of society. There's pozzed-out pockets in major metropolitan areas, people are still pretty in their right minds.

Online crap is more important now than it ever was before, it's easy reporting. Instead of having to go and report on a demonstration they can check Twitter and write a piece about how literally hundreds of people around the world are mad about something happening somewhere.
Just look at how much less attention the G8/etc hooligans have gotten over the last few years.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: nerdball on June 19, 2014, 10:08:06 PM

Seriously, is there any sexual practice that draws any condemnation these days other than pedophilia? I mean, I'm not white-knighting for pedos here, but that's pretty much the last taboo remaining.

Outside of the online echo chamber, none of the tumblerkin kinks are in any way accepted in the majority of society. There's pozzed-out pockets in major metropolitan areas, people are still pretty in their right minds.

Online crap is more important now than it ever was before, it's easy reporting. Instead of having to go and report on a demonstration they can check Twitter and write a piece about how literally hundreds of people around the world are mad about something happening somewhere.
Just look at how much less attention the G8/etc hooligans have gotten over the last few years.

That's a fair point, but I don't think the media being full of lazy, dumb shitstains who wouldn't know how actual journalism works if their lives depended on it, will move the needle in favor of diaperfurs in most of flyover country.


I admit this might be wishful thinking on my part.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on June 20, 2014, 03:51:39 PM
Seriously, is there any sexual practice that draws any condemnation these days other than pedophilia? I mean, I'm not white-knighting for pedos here, but that's pretty much the last taboo remaining.

Don't let the Internet make you think things are more acceptable than they are.

There's "accepted by tumblrites" and "Not a big deal if you bring it up at Thanksgiving dinner".

Know the difference.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Martin Looter King on June 20, 2014, 05:14:52 PM
Seriously, is there any sexual practice that draws any condemnation these days other than pedophilia? I mean, I'm not white-knighting for pedos here, but that's pretty much the last taboo remaining.

Don't let the Internet make you think things are more acceptable than they are.

There's "accepted by tumblrites" and "Not a big deal if you bring it up at Thanksgiving dinner".

Know the difference.

That is so true.  I work with some tech savvy people and most of them haven't heard about any of this SJW shit like "Check Your Privilege" or TransfaggotPollys, etc.  This is the same shit that has been on the internet since 1996, you have an extremely loud vocal minority of morons making a shitton of noise about stupid shit.  See also: every video game forum ever.

The ultimate insult to these #SJW faggots is that the people their rail against the most probably don't even know they exist.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Spokker on June 20, 2014, 05:30:08 PM
None of this stuff has ever been an issue in my real life.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Spokker on June 20, 2014, 05:34:47 PM
Like most, I'm glad John Cheese isn't my dad.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-pieces-advice-your-dad-gave-you-that-are-total-b.s./


All of that advise is still very pertinent.  The author is either completely pozzed or 18 years old.
They got one thing wrong.

Quote
Advice That's Followed by "You'll Understand When You're My Age"
should be
Quote
Advice That's Followed by "You'll Understand When You Own a Potentially Appreciating Asset, Like a Home

Once you own a home, you start to give a shit about things like property values, which tends to make people more conservative as they age. Next thing you know you are yelling at the city council not to allow a developer to build low income housing near your McMansion.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Martin Looter King on June 20, 2014, 06:17:18 PM
Once you own a home, you start to give a shit about things like property values, which tends to make people more conservative as they age. Next thing you know you are yelling at the city council not to allow a developer to build low income housing near your McMansion.

So fucking true.  That was me about 3 weeks ago.  Took my 5 year old too to show her how government works.  She thought it was boring, and she's right. 

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on June 20, 2014, 08:49:27 PM
Seriously, is there any sexual practice that draws any condemnation these days other than pedophilia? I mean, I'm not white-knighting for pedos here, but that's pretty much the last taboo remaining.

Don't let the Internet make you think things are more acceptable than they are.

There's "accepted by tumblrites" and "Not a big deal if you bring it up at Thanksgiving dinner".

Know the difference.

That is so true.  I work with some tech savvy people and most of them haven't heard about any of this SJW shit like "Check Your Privilege" or TransfaggotPollys, etc.  This is the same shit that has been on the internet since 1996, you have an extremely loud vocal minority of morons making a shitton of noise about stupid shit.  See also: every video game forum ever.

The ultimate insult to these #SJW faggots is that the people their rail against the most probably don't even know they exist.

I didn't know bullshit like a degree in "gender studies" actually existed until I saw goons boasting about obtaining them (before bitching about remaining unemployed on top having debt afterwards).
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on June 20, 2014, 09:52:01 PM
It's really interesting how these worldviews seem to be shared by two primary groups: the academic elite, and trendy, attention-whoring teenage girls on Tumblr.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on June 20, 2014, 09:58:36 PM
I went to a school that emphasized STEM and the feminists repeatedly tried to reform the school's engineering department.  I've mentioned a lot of the stories before here.  I knew about this pozzed shit before Tumblr was a thing.  Except back then they'd refer to everything as sexist instead of misogynistic.  I'm guessing they thought that misogynistic is an uglier word or something and eventually switched over to using that term instead.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on June 20, 2014, 11:51:35 PM
yea outside of some clickbait blogs the crazier shit has no pull. At least publicly. If I tried to explain any of this shit to my coworkers they'd think I'm nuts.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on June 22, 2014, 11:47:06 AM
Looks like someone is asleep at the wheel over at the ole cracked aych queue, which is the only way I figure this article got through the grinder

http://www.cracked.com/blog/3-ways-checking-your-privilege-never-fixed-anything/

Quote
The first problem with "check your privilege" is the most stated one: It makes assumptions. Whom do you say it to? Just anyone who disagrees with your point on race, gender, sexual orientation, and/or socio-economics? Or do you just say it to white dudes who disagree with you? Cisgendered? Or whoever looks like the power elite on whatever topic you're fighting about?


But OK, let's say you're arguing over one of the many things people love to fight about and your adversary has expressed an opinion directly opposite to what you believe to be true. What does "check your privilege" say? It says you believe the root of the disagreement is your adversary's background. He or she feels this way because they're white, because they're straight, because they're rich.

In a very odd way, "check your privilege" is kind of racist, because it assumes someone's background dictates their opinions. Of course, we are all products of environments, but do you really think you can sum up someone's entire argument, if not existence, by referring to their background? You may not call it their race, gender, orientation, or social stratus. You call it their "privilege," but, ultimately, that's just code for saying, "Hey, your opinions are wrong because you're ___."

Aside from the dangers of assuming someone is privileged based on appearance, you're also assuming that background leads to only one conclusion. You're judging someone based on where they're from. Assuming why they believe what they believe. It's behavior beneath the dignity of someone who allegedly cares about prejudice and discrimination.


I've had friends explain that to me -- "check your privilege" is only trying to start a dialogue. That's almost the equivalent of saying that "check my cock for your wife's lipstick" would start a dialogue about the state of one's marriage. The phrase is insulting. It's a shortcut allowing you to dismiss the opposing views of your adversary. It does absolutely nothing to illuminate.

If you're a black transsexual woman arguing with some white cisgendered male and you truly want to explain how his "privilege" prevents him from understanding your point, your struggle, or simply you, then spouting "check your privilege" isn't going to help. "Check your privilege" fosters no mutual understanding. Why not talk about you? Explain you? Share you?

What do you want: to be an understood, accepted part of the world with an equal chance for happiness and success, or just to tell the people you perceive as privileged that they're wrong? What is your goal? What is your endgame?



 :nixon: a well earned Nixon.

Lets see whats going on in the comments, shall we?

Quote
Unfortunately, in addition to being transsexual, I'm also an engineering student, which means I don't have time to explain (often read: justify) my whole life to every single person operating off of false premises. At least half of the people who try to engage me in conversation aren't doing it in good faith either. I once had a guy ask me to explain being trans to him, so I said it meant that I'm neurologically female. His response (issued mid-sentence) was "no, that's wrong. You have a penis. You have an adams apple."

 :stewart:

Quote
Although I am Black, a woman, and a lover of sociology, social justice and race relations, I've been put down on Tumblr because I've expressed my disgust and disdain over some SJ people's overt combativeness, offensiveness and unwillingness to have useful dialogue. Check Your Privilege is one of the fastest ways to stifle conversation I know, and it's never gotten anyone anywhere except on the fast-track to hating social justice.

Some people are smart with their dialogue, and others are just offensive and stupid. I have been accused of siding with the oppressors. An entire group tried to force me to unfollow them for disagreeing with one single post out of hundreds that I'd followed.

Those Tumblr SJ people who hate discussing things in a smart manner hurt more than help. And they're fake as all get out. Hiding behind screens and being condescending.

Give me some real breathing people in front of me and let us discuss the facts at a round table, not hiding behind screens and hot-headed loaded language.

Damn. They make me mad sometimes. Rant over.

Woah. Nooooot bad.

Quote
Yes to this article. I am a 20 year old girl, and when I was eight years old I was raped pretty consistently by a relative for about eight months. And a lot of people would say that I have more right to talk about, legislate, and make deductions regarding rape, and birth control and abortion in these sorts of scenarios. But what people don't seem to understand, and I never used to, was that all the decisions can't be made by me, because I'm as irrational, emotional and bias as every other person on the planet. Especially regarding rape, where I've been known to have unreasonable emotional reactions to certain things. That's not correct, I can't fly off the handle at everyone because they unwittingly did something, or made a joke that struck me wrong. they didn't rape me, and Do not deserve to be treated like that. And often times I need other people from outside of my experience to let me know that I'm being irrational.

Long story short, I can give my testimony, but in the end I don't know any better than a straight white man on how to stop, or curb rape. I am a victim of a crime, not an expert in psychology, or law. I'm just someone something happened to, and I need people with a different "privilege" to tell me when I'm being unfair. Everyone gets a voice.

Holey fukkin guacamole are we seeing the unraveling of time and space here with all this realtalk?



Quote
If you're white and poor, you are privileged over the non-white poor.

If you are white and middle class, you are privileged over the non-white middle class.

If you are male, you are privileged over females.

It's not about their background. And it's not "racist" in that anybody is accusing anybody of being bad for being white or male.

It's a fair, reasonable retort when somebody says something that suggests that they do not realize they have benefited from being white and/or male.

Like when white people suggest Treyvon Martin should not have worn a hoodie -- something that definitely would not be said had a white 16 year old been shot after being deemed suspicious for walking down the street with candy.

White privilege, male privilege, is simply not having to worry about, and suffer from, what minorities and females have to suffer through when faced with the exact same circumstances that whites and males have no trouble getting through.

(http://i.imgur.com/DArHJOG.jpg)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: bareback bathhouse sodomy on June 22, 2014, 12:54:30 PM
Hmm. I'm thinking of writing a book, it's going to be called “So you’re a lefty Jewish intellectual who championed a new order based on reason and progress and when it reached the popular stage you realized you only created a new thuggish orthodoxy which you fearfully wonder if you may or may not still be in charge of, 2nd Edition.”


   Do you already have the 1st edition published??


   It's being renamed for republication - the original title was "The Communist Manifesto" and it didn't go down too well with the American public.


 :nixon:

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on June 22, 2014, 11:48:46 PM
Except back then they'd refer to everything as sexist instead of misogynistic.  I'm guessing they thought that misogynistic is an uglier word or something and eventually switched over to using that term instead.

presumable because people would turn 'sexist' around on them with stuff like all the soldiers dying in all the wars being male and shit like that
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Trump is the New Norma on June 23, 2014, 01:36:31 AM
It's really interesting how these worldviews seem to be shared by two primary groups: the academic elite, and trendy, attention-whoring teenage girls on Tumblr.
Both of whom are completely insulated to reality by the academic/tenure/insular worldview in academia, and their parents/the government in the case of SJWs. They're actually being *propped up* rather than held down by society. If shit were really in the toilet like they claim, they'd be out on the street.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on June 23, 2014, 12:48:23 PM
It's really interesting how these worldviews seem to be shared by two primary groups: the academic elite, and trendy, attention-whoring teenage girls on Tumblr.

That element is ALL OVER THE PLACE at liberal arts colleges, but for the most part it's self-contained. They live in a little hugbox bubble which makes them all think that they're super relevant and on the bleeding edge of social justice and are making big changes, because they don't really venture out into real life very much (hint: much like Tumblr). There are efforts to "reach out to the community" but for the most part they're totally ignored. There are occasional activists that are the champions and heroes of those groups, but most of them are lazy undergrad students on student loans / daddy deep pockets who don't give a shit about social justice when it requires anything involving more effort than clicking "re-blog".

It's SUPER rare that someone who actually gives a fuck because they're paying their own way through college wastes their time on these programs. Incredibly liberal USA student loan policies that allow students to live for free, consequence free for like 6 years, are really the absolute heart of this trend.

I only had to cross paths with this shit if I wanted to. There was a big sign at the "student bike collective" that said "Gender is a SOCIAL CONSTRUCT so ALL are welcome at our weekly Ladies / trans / queer / POC bicycle ride" which translates to "die white male cis scum, let's ride bikes like faggots". Those idiots and their constituents make up about 20% of the college but if you just ignore them, they basically don't exist.

(hint: just like tumblr)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on June 23, 2014, 01:01:36 PM
It's really interesting how these worldviews seem to be shared by two primary groups: the academic elite, and trendy, attention-whoring teenage girls on Tumblr.

That element is ALL OVER THE PLACE at liberal arts colleges, but for the most part it's self-contained. They live in a little hugbox bubble which makes them all think that they're super relevant and on the bleeding edge of social justice and are making big changes, because they don't really venture out into real life very much (hint: much like Tumblr). There are efforts to "reach out to the community" but for the most part they're totally ignored. There are occasional activists that are the champions and heroes of those groups, but most of them are lazy undergrad students on student loans / daddy deep pockets who don't give a shit about social justice when it requires anything involving more effort than clicking "re-blog".

It's SUPER rare that someone who actually gives a fuck because they're paying their own way through college wastes their time on these programs. Incredibly liberal USA student loan policies that allow students to live for free, consequence free for like 6 years, are really the absolute heart of this trend.

I graduated from the small computer science program at what is arguably the most pozzed out colleges in the USA and even then, I only had to cross paths with this shit if I wanted to. There was a big sign at the "student bike collective" that said "Gender is a SOCIAL CONSTRUCT so ALL are welcome at our weekly Ladies / trans / queer / POC bicycle ride" which translates to "die white male cis scum, let's ride bikes like faggots". Those idiots and their constituents make up about 20% of the college but if you just ignore them, they basically don't exist.

(hint: just like tumblr)

Your post reminds me of something that happened when I was in college back in 2002. The Student Union used to give out these day planners. A local strip club sponsored the printing of the planners and there was an ad with a woman in lingerie on the last page. I'm not talking the cover or anything, this was the last paper page of the planner and it was super easy to tear out and toss in the trash if you didn't like it. But there was this group of feminists on campus who took to the media and the student union was forced to do a reprint and offer an apology. There was no sponsor this time around, so it blew like half the student union's budget for the year (This is a campus with 15,000 students). The feminist group went so far as to insist that they be allowed to set up a table in the student center and hand out the planners themselves as a way of taking credit. I remember watching this 300 pound woman give people these new non-stripclub planners with just the most smug look on her face. I don't even think most people opted to trade in their planners with the ad, so the bulk of the new ones just got tossed in the trash anyway.  Great job, gang! :reagan:

The point is, like twenty people created all this noise in the media over a non-issue, cost the Student Union north of $20,000, and 99% of the people on campus did not give a shit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on June 23, 2014, 01:18:52 PM
I graduated from the small computer science program at what is arguably the most pozzed out colleges in the USA and even then, I only had to cross paths with this shit if I wanted to. There was a big sign at the "student bike collective" that said "Gender is a SOCIAL CONSTRUCT so ALL are welcome at our weekly Ladies / trans / queer / POC bicycle ride" which translates to "die white male cis scum, let's ride bikes like faggots". Those idiots and their constituents make up about 20% of the college but if you just ignore them, they basically don't exist.

(hint: just like tumblr)


(http://i.imgur.com/EKjMiXr.gif)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Monostats Infected Scrotum on June 24, 2014, 10:28:54 AM
Here's a refreshingly anti-pozzed Cracked article:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/3-ways-checking-your-privilege-never-fixed-anything/
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on June 24, 2014, 11:05:17 AM
Here's a refreshingly anti-pozzed Cracked article:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/3-ways-checking-your-privilege-never-fixed-anything/
scroll up a few posts smrtgy
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Monostats Infected Scrotum on June 24, 2014, 12:12:30 PM
Here's a refreshingly anti-pozzed Cracked article:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/3-ways-checking-your-privilege-never-fixed-anything/
scroll up a few posts smrtgy

Alright, I  :gapo: that up.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on June 29, 2014, 10:33:35 PM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21339_5-reasons-being-male-porn-star-less-fun-than-it-looks.html

Quote
I was having a lot of anal one day thanks to two girls with strap-ons, and while I was in the bathroom cleaning out my butt, I saw James Franco next to me washing his hands.

fucking disgusting
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on June 30, 2014, 12:20:23 PM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21289_7-things-i-learned-as-accomplice-to-mass-murder.html

Woman gets dragged into fucked up shit as a child because mother was accomplice to mass murder, still is less pozzed than vast majority of reg cracked columnists (seriously was an interesting story).
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Neat's little buddy on June 30, 2014, 03:30:25 PM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21339_5-reasons-being-male-porn-star-less-fun-than-it-looks.html

Quote
I was having a lot of anal one day thanks to two girls with strap-ons, and while I was in the bathroom cleaning out my butt, I saw James Franco next to me washing his hands.

fucking disgusting

That article is some fucked up, degenerate shit.  :eminem:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on July 03, 2014, 10:25:00 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-5-stupidest-habits-you-develop-growing-up-poor-part-2/

John Cheese is terrible
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: As a white male I on July 03, 2014, 01:23:30 PM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21339_5-reasons-being-male-porn-star-less-fun-than-it-looks.html

Quote
I was having a lot of anal one day thanks to two girls with strap-ons, and while I was in the bathroom cleaning out my butt, I saw James Franco next to me washing his hands.

fucking disgusting

That article is some fucked up, degenerate shit.  :eminem:

Holy shit no kidding.

Quote
I had no idea I'd be turned on by clowns. But a couple of months ago, I was filming with this girl and got fucked in the ass by Harley Quinn

:facepalm:
Day by day I'm starting to agree more with radical muslims about burning down the degenerate west.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Obese-n-Triggered on July 03, 2014, 08:24:44 PM
im mad because spongebob hasnt matured to my adult tastes

how about some episodes where mr crabs goes to the seajew for a loan and the seajew gets put in jail for usury
or an episode where pearly comes out as gay
or what about an episode where spongebob kills patrick for sleeping with his wife
"Ohhhhhh who lives in a pineapple under the sea? "

My fucking ex-wife, that's who. Bitch took everything in the divorce.
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_loyzdh2Jbk1qif5qvo4_500.jpg)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on July 06, 2014, 01:20:17 AM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21171_5-adventures-i-had-as-cam-girl-with-niche-in-sex-puppets.html

not even gonna read this one, i'm done with cracked, for real this time i'm finished, no more extended breaks no more checking in out of curiosity no more reading old articles for nostalgia, i'm really finished this time
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Obese-n-Triggered on July 06, 2014, 01:35:58 AM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21171_5-adventures-i-had-as-cam-girl-with-niche-in-sex-puppets.html

not even gonna read this one, i'm done with cracked, for real this time i'm finished, no more extended breaks no more checking in out of curiosity no more reading old articles for nostalgia, i'm really finished this time

At least there's tit pics  :unparsons:
http://t.co/FWpIDXckCI
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on July 06, 2014, 12:41:26 PM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21171_5-adventures-i-had-as-cam-girl-with-niche-in-sex-puppets.html

not even gonna read this one, i'm done with cracked, for real this time i'm finished, no more extended breaks no more checking in out of curiosity no more reading old articles for nostalgia, i'm really finished this time

Girl fucking her Ventriloquist dummy admits she is nuts, expects this to be some sort of revelation.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on July 06, 2014, 10:21:26 PM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21339_5-reasons-being-male-porn-star-less-fun-than-it-looks.html

Quote
I was having a lot of anal one day thanks to two girls with strap-ons, and while I was in the bathroom cleaning out my butt, I saw James Franco next to me washing his hands.

fucking disgusting

That article is some fucked up, degenerate shit.  :eminem:

Holy shit no kidding.

Quote
I had no idea I'd be turned on by clowns. But a couple of months ago, I was filming with this girl and got fucked in the ass by Harley Quinn

:facepalm:
Day by day I'm starting to agree more with radical muslims about burning down the degenerate west.

What we need is a new Vlad, willing to stake both radical muslims AND male ass-fucking porn stars:

(http://econc10.bu.edu/economic_systems/NatIdentity/EE/Romania/explicit_xy.gif)

I long for the days of simple Wallachian justice.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on July 07, 2014, 02:28:25 AM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21171_5-adventures-i-had-as-cam-girl-with-niche-in-sex-puppets.html

not even gonna read this one, i'm done with cracked, for real this time i'm finished, no more extended breaks no more checking in out of curiosity no more reading old articles for nostalgia, i'm really finished this time

At least there's tit pics  :unparsons:
http://t.co/FWpIDXckCI

yon clown faced maiden indeed
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on July 22, 2014, 01:48:18 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-uncomfortable-truths-about-rape-college-campuses/


pozzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz


prob should crosspost in approx 10 other ss threads
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on July 22, 2014, 09:32:28 PM
Being a gamer is now an identity instead of something to be ashamed of.

If what kind of media you consume (movies, TV, games, books) is a primary bullet point when you answer the question "tell me about yourself" then you've failed at life.

Anyone over ~14 who identifies as "I'm a Gamer!" is a worthless piece of shit.

Exactly this.  If when someone asks you your hobbies, if "vidya games" are in the top 3, you probably have a problem.  I say probably because a lot of people unfortunately would use that same time watching terrible TV, so it kind of depends.  It is when vidya games become part of who you are that you have crossed the line.  In the same way, if your favorite TV show becomes part of your identity, chances are you're in trouble too.

I know plenty of well-adjusted guys who watch nerdy TV shows, play *some* vidya games (generally sports and shooting games) but it isn't their life.  If you have enough time in your life to play that much vidya games, consider getting into a team sport or working out more.  Or, I dunno, learn a new skill.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on July 23, 2014, 11:55:14 AM
todays article is all about stereotypes in fiction and its people butthurt about Fat Bastard or Rob Schneider playing an asian stereotype
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on July 23, 2014, 11:58:55 AM
todays article is all about stereotypes in fiction and its people butthurt about Fat Bastard or Rob Schneider playing an asian stereotype

I'm pretty sure rob schneider is half asian making his inclusion in surf ninjas incredibly appropriate even though he's never surfed a day in his life.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on July 23, 2014, 01:50:24 PM
todays article is all about stereotypes in fiction and its people butthurt about Fat Bastard or Rob Schneider playing an asian stereotype

I'm pretty sure rob schneider is half asian making his inclusion in surf ninjas incredibly appropriate even though he's never surfed a day in his life.

Yeah, he's part Flip
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on July 23, 2014, 05:49:27 PM
http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty_982_18-offensive-stereotypes-you-still-see-in-movies-tv/

Until the last one, this is a bunch of OMG my feels shit. The last one isn't really funny on its own, but is pretty funny relative to the rest.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Autistic Yankee on July 23, 2014, 06:25:43 PM
http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty_982_18-offensive-stereotypes-you-still-see-in-movies-tv/

Until the last one, this is a bunch of OMG my feels shit. The last one isn't really funny on its own, but is pretty funny relative to the rest.

I'm surprised they included white Europeon sterotypes.  But here is the thing, no Italian, Irishman, or Russian I know would ever fucking CARE about this shit.  In fact, they would think it was fucking hilarious.


Also, no one on Earth makes more :chank: CHING CHONG DING DONG :chank: jokes than 2nd+ generation Asian immigrants.  Every Asian I know would not only laugh at that joke, but they would probably be the ones who came up with it in the first place.


This is just white  :goonette:'s getting offended on behalf of other cultures.  Which is pretty fucking racist.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on July 23, 2014, 06:34:54 PM
lol they're gooning out about people having accents.

HOW DARE THE RUSSIAN GANGSTER SPEAK WITH A RUSSIAN ACCENT! :madgoon:

I guess give him a southern drawl next time and confuse everyone (including the person who complained because they aren't actually upset they just wanna whine)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on July 23, 2014, 06:36:55 PM
It was pretty funny when NPR tried to burn  :adam: during an interview accusing him of doing a racist asian impersonation. He replied that it was his friend who happens to be asian and called them out for being dicks which led to NPR burying the entire story.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on July 23, 2014, 06:44:17 PM
its particularly funny when asian americans who embrace white american liberalism try to speak for non-american asians, see the 'avril lavigne's hello kitty video is racist towards japan' thing. like there was this tumblr post where the OP was like 'I AM AN ASIAN-AMERICAN AND I DON'T KNOW JAPANESE VERY WELL, BUT AS A PERSON OF COLOR I THINK THAT...'

and she actually got realtalked pretty hard in the notes
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Renegade Jew on July 23, 2014, 06:54:00 PM
People getting offended for each other pisses me off. Dude, it's none of your business, lay it off.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Autistic Yankee on July 23, 2014, 07:01:48 PM
People getting offended for each other pisses me off. Dude, it's none of your business, lay it off.

It's worse than that.  It's treating other races like they are the retarded kid in school.  I have to be offended FOR him because he just doesn't know any better!

You see, as white (cis) men, it is our burden to uplift the lesser (privileged) races.  They are just like children and we need to guide them.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on July 23, 2014, 07:40:26 PM
People getting offended for each other pisses me off. Dude, it's none of your business, lay it off.

It's worse than that.  It's treating other races like they are the retarded kid in school.  I have to be offended FOR him because he just doesn't know any better!

You see, as white (cis) men, it is our burden to uplift the lesser (privileged) races.  They are just like children and we need to guide them.

I wish there was a way to explain that by fighting the white cis het patriarchal scums racism (or for the most part lack therof) by doing exactly as you describe, they are really being racist sacks of shit. doublethink is a hell of a drug.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on July 26, 2014, 06:07:35 PM
SIGH. Here we go with more SJW bullshit:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-uncomfortable-truths-about-rape-college-campuses/

THIS IS A HUMOR SITE! WHERE THE FUCK IS THE FUNNY?!!?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: unprivsplain on July 27, 2014, 12:13:51 AM
The comments are usually a goldmine.
Quote
To be honest I didn't read this one for about two days, I'm not exactly sure why but rape just gets to me in a way that feels like a 2 ton wrecking ball. My friend told me about her experience of getting raped by a friend on coke and it seriously fucked me up for the next week, I have a very intense sense of empathy but this is just something else.

I hear descendants of hollocaust survivors still retain epigenetic changes (this affects how your genes that encode proteins behave) that predispose them to stress and other adjustments to traumatic situations. My mom was raped in her childhood by an older sibling (pedophile and has moved to the US, I only know about him through my mom), could this have predisposed me to this trigger? The most fucked up part is I have a rape fantasy. (me receiving, not the other way around)

Anyways rape is awful and the reason you'll have to play your way through subtle psychological tests if you chat me up at the bar along with a myriad of other behaviour's Men find annoying when trying to find a consensual partner so we'd better f*****g deal with that s**t because sex is seriously awesome and we are all missing out when we have to worry about sociopaths and drunk/high people thinking they don't have to ask first. And yes there are ways of giving consent without words but you'd better use some serious discretion.

PS. I have a dick but I wouldn't strictly consider myself a man, I feel about equally comfortably thinking of myself as a tomboyish woman or effeminate man.

Quote
Omg, I love you. This whole comment was great for me-I'm a cross dressing bisexual but when I meet a guy into cross dressers I go borderline trans and I'm also pretty kinky. I know I could get into a rape fantasy scenario as a sub. Also as a sub I know how easy it would be for a partner to go to far if I'm bound....

Quote
You both are f a g s with genetic defects
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: bareback bathhouse sodomy on July 27, 2014, 03:14:00 AM
Mods, please change my name to "PS : 'I have a dick'

Thank You.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on July 27, 2014, 12:57:02 PM
The comments are usually a goldmine.
Quote
To be honest I didn't read this one for about two days, I'm not exactly sure why but rape just gets to me in a way that feels like a 2 ton wrecking ball. My friend told me about her experience of getting raped by a friend on coke and it seriously fucked me up for the next week, I have a very intense sense of empathy but this is just something else.

I hear descendants of hollocaust survivors still retain epigenetic changes (this affects how your genes that encode proteins behave) that predispose them to stress and other adjustments to traumatic situations. My mom was raped in her childhood by an older sibling (pedophile and has moved to the US, I only know about him through my mom), could this have predisposed me to this trigger? The most fucked up part is I have a rape fantasy. (me receiving, not the other way around)

Anyways rape is awful and the reason you'll have to play your way through subtle psychological tests if you chat me up at the bar along with a myriad of other behaviour's Men find annoying when trying to find a consensual partner so we'd better f*****g deal with that s**t because sex is seriously awesome and we are all missing out when we have to worry about sociopaths and drunk/high people thinking they don't have to ask first. And yes there are ways of giving consent without words but you'd better use some serious discretion.

PS. I have a dick but I wouldn't strictly consider myself a man, I feel about equally comfortably thinking of myself as a tomboyish woman or effeminate man.

Quote
Omg, I love you. This whole comment was great for me-I'm a cross dressing bisexual but when I meet a guy into cross dressers I go borderline trans and I'm also pretty kinky. I know I could get into a rape fantasy scenario as a sub. Also as a sub I know how easy it would be for a partner to go to far if I'm bound....

Quote
You both are f a g s with genetic defects

Which one of these is Shmorky?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Problematic on August 02, 2014, 09:44:24 PM
too bad he is 2 years late,but now Seanbaby is Fighting the Patriarchy one faggy tweet at a time.

(http://s16.postimg.org/ev694pb2d/sjw_baby111.png)



Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: New Feminist Jihad on August 02, 2014, 10:43:15 PM
too bad he is 2 years late,but now Seanbaby is Fighting the Patriarchy one faggy tweet at a time.
nice linux dude
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Problematic on August 02, 2014, 11:15:32 PM
Fixed

(http://s28.postimg.org/urtb5bu4d/resized_600.jpg)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on August 04, 2014, 09:27:19 AM
None of these campaigns are based on what men or women say the prefer. Nope.

http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty_1004_18-ad-campaigns-built-straight-up-sexism/
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on August 04, 2014, 09:38:48 AM
I just clicked through that and ugh. HOW DARE YOU USE PINK TO APPEAL TO WOMEN, HOW DARE YOU THINK WOMEN LIKE TO SHOP, HOW DARE YOU THINK *a bunch of objectively true stuff about the vast majority of wymyn*.

What is their solution? Marketing gun toys and violent vidya to women? Marketing pink stuff to men? Isn't that going to lead these same shitlibs to declare their own kids as trannies and start them on hormones and shit?

When I was a little boy I liked gun toys and sword toys and pro wrasslin and fighting with my brothers and movies with 'splosions and big guns and tough guys and playing in the mud and dirt and rough housing with my dogs. Companies knew this and made toys and movies and TV shows for me, which my parents bought and I enjoyed. The little girls I knew liked princesses and tea parties and dresses and plastic jewelry and movies about princesses marrying handsome princes in big fancy castles. Companies knew that too, and made stuff for them too.

Isn't that freedom? To choose what I wanted? Based on healthy natural tendencies for boys and girls?

Oh wait no we were all brainwashed by the patriarchy into artificial gender roles. That's why I liked to swordfight with sticks at the fucking age of 4.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on August 04, 2014, 09:51:31 AM
Oh and on the same day they run an article about the EVILS OF SEXIST ADVERTISING they have an article saying hey, doing meth isn't so bad :unparsons:

http://www.cracked.com/article_21522_5-facts-about-meth-anti-drug-ads-wont-show-you.html

its not all that bad you guys c'mon stop stigmatizing meth

Its like the left is trying to destroy society.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: ompb on August 04, 2014, 09:59:15 AM
Its like the left is trying to destroy society.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on August 04, 2014, 02:34:55 PM
Its like the left is trying to destroy society.

Well, yeah. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cultural_Marxism)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on August 04, 2014, 03:00:27 PM
I just clicked through that and ugh. HOW DARE YOU USE PINK TO APPEAL TO WOMEN, HOW DARE YOU THINK WOMEN LIKE TO SHOP, HOW DARE YOU THINK *a bunch of objectively true stuff about the vast majority of wymyn*.

There was a whole load of poz injected into the watch thread in YLLS when someone suggested that automatic watches with elaborate and complicated precision engineering are an inherently more attractive product to a male market than to females.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on August 04, 2014, 04:26:48 PM
Its like the left is trying to destroy society.

Well, yeah. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cultural_Marxism)

Quote from: Wikipedia
Cultural Marxists use Marxist methods (historical research, the identification of economic interest, the study of the mutually conditioning relations between parts of a social order) to try to understand the complexity of power in contemporary society and to make it possible to criticise what, cultural Marxists propose, appears natural but is in fact ideological.

 :lolno: What in the fuck?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on August 06, 2014, 07:16:36 AM
The comments are usually a goldmine.
Quote
To be honest I didn't read this one for about two days, I'm not exactly sure why but rape just gets to me in a way that feels like a 2 ton wrecking ball. My friend told me about her experience of getting raped by a friend on coke and it seriously fucked me up for the next week, I have a very intense sense of empathy but this is just something else.

I hear descendants of hollocaust survivors still retain epigenetic changes (this affects how your genes that encode proteins behave) that predispose them to stress and other adjustments to traumatic situations. My mom was raped in her childhood by an older sibling (pedophile and has moved to the US, I only know about him through my mom), could this have predisposed me to this trigger? The most fucked up part is I have a rape fantasy. (me receiving, not the other way around)

Anyways rape is awful and the reason you'll have to play your way through subtle psychological tests if you chat me up at the bar along with a myriad of other behaviour's Men find annoying when trying to find a consensual partner so we'd better f*****g deal with that s**t because sex is seriously awesome and we are all missing out when we have to worry about sociopaths and drunk/high people thinking they don't have to ask first. And yes there are ways of giving consent without words but you'd better use some serious discretion.

PS. I have a dick but I wouldn't strictly consider myself a man, I feel about equally comfortably thinking of myself as a tomboyish woman or effeminate man.

burn the country to the ground
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on August 06, 2014, 07:34:33 PM
I can't see shit like that as anything but white men wanting to be part of SJW cliques but realizing that they'll always be shat on and treated as less than human no matter how hard they try to be 'allies' so they decide to call themselves 'agender' or 'genderqueer' or some shit instead.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on August 06, 2014, 11:27:35 PM
Theoretically you can be a dude who is genderfluid/genderqueer who is in boymode every day of their life.  However if you call them anything other than those terms, you are a triggering bigot.

As society becomes more pozzed out, if you're shameless enough, it's a good way to get oppression points without actually changing anything about yourself.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on August 06, 2014, 11:53:28 PM
queer is a super vague meaningless term
queer is for two types of people

1. Gay people where gay isn't special enough anymore
2. Straight people who want to get their foot in the door for LGBT shit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on August 07, 2014, 01:44:32 AM
Theoretically you can be a dude who is genderfluid/genderqueer who is in boymode every day of their life.  However if you call them anything other than those terms, you are a triggering bigot.

As society becomes more pozzed out, if you're shameless enough, it's a good way to get oppression points without actually changing anything about yourself.

Really you could just straight up claim to be a woman and change nothing. If they want to be internally consistent there isn't anything they can say about it.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: bolonium on August 07, 2014, 02:54:01 AM
Theoretically you can be a dude who is genderfluid/genderqueer who is in boymode every day of their life.  However if you call them anything other than those terms, you are a triggering bigot.

As society becomes more pozzed out, if you're shameless enough, it's a good way to get oppression points without actually changing anything about yourself.

Really you could just straight up claim to be a woman and change nothing. If they want to be internally consistent there isn't anything they can say about it.
Right, because glaring inconsistencies in their argument has bothered them before.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Autistic Yankee on August 07, 2014, 03:30:43 PM
Couldn't I argue that I'm a lesbian transgender female who identifies as male, but was also born with a mans body?


I'm a man who was born a man and I like to fuck chicks
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on August 07, 2014, 04:16:54 PM
Couldn't I argue that I'm a lesbian transgender female who identifies as male, but was also born with a mans body?


I'm a man who was born a man and I like to fuck chicks

No, since according to them, whatever you identify as = what you are. They'd realize you were just fucking with them if you didn't use their EXACT logic.

You COULD say that you're a assigned-male-at-birth lesbian who is very butch but doesn't suffer from any dysphoria, hence being male-bodied and presenting as traditionally male and not wanting any reassignment treatment. Some people might shout "bullshit" but it meshes perfectly with their idea of what "gender" is.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on August 12, 2014, 02:02:17 PM
Cracked appeals to the same type of nerdy shut-in ultralib goons that SA appeals to, which is why this is the best lol in a cracked article yet:

http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/robin-williams-why-funny-people-kill-themselves/

Quote
By now you know that Robin Williams has committed suicide, but I'm not here to talk about him. He's gone, and you're still here, and suicidal thoughts are so common among our readers and writers that our message board has a hidden section where moderators can coordinate responses to suicide threats. And in case you're wondering, no, that's not a joke -- I remember the first time John tracked down a guy's location and got an ambulance dispatched to his house. Then we all sat there, at 4 in the morning, waiting to hear if they got there in time (they did).

These losers are so pathetic that when they snap and tell someone they are suicidal, its not a friend, a relative, a doctor...no no no its cracked dawt cawm.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Slacktivist on August 12, 2014, 03:05:38 PM
Quote
suicidal thoughts are so common among our readers and writers that our message board has a hidden section where moderators can coordinate responses to suicide threats

 :tom:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: New Feminist Jihad on August 12, 2014, 05:39:02 PM
Maybe this'll out me as a loser but I don't really care who someone tells as long as they tell someone and are safe in the end. I'm not going to mock someone for being suicidal and afraid to tell anyone they know personally, even if it's "pathetic".
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on August 12, 2014, 05:51:28 PM
hello my name is caylen burroughs and i have nothing to live for


suicide? no i was just sayin'.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Babomb on August 12, 2014, 05:53:43 PM
I just clicked through that and ugh. HOW DARE YOU USE PINK TO APPEAL TO WOMEN, HOW DARE YOU THINK WOMEN LIKE TO SHOP, HOW DARE YOU THINK *a bunch of objectively true stuff about the vast majority of wymyn*.

What is their solution? Marketing gun toys and violent vidya to women? Marketing pink stuff to men? Isn't that going to lead these same shitlibs to declare their own kids as trannies and start them on hormones and shit?

When I was a little boy I liked gun toys and sword toys and pro wrasslin and fighting with my brothers and movies with 'splosions and big guns and tough guys and playing in the mud and dirt and rough housing with my dogs. Companies knew this and made toys and movies and TV shows for me, which my parents bought and I enjoyed. The little girls I knew liked princesses and tea parties and dresses and plastic jewelry and movies about princesses marrying handsome princes in big fancy castles. Companies knew that too, and made stuff for them too.

Isn't that freedom? To choose what I wanted? Based on healthy natural tendencies for boys and girls?

Oh wait no we were all brainwashed by the patriarchy into artificial gender roles. That's why I liked to swordfight with sticks at the fucking age of 4.
Yes.

On average boys like violence and explosions and fighting and weapons and girls like dressing up being princessess and befriending princes and the like.

Of course there are going to be some boys who like the girls things and girls who like the boys things, which is fine, play with whatever you like.  But on average this is how it is, and a broad marketting campaign focused for boys or girls is what sells toys.  Parents know the brands and can easily tell if its a girl toy or a boy toy, but ultimately it is up to the parent to interact with their kid and figure out if they like those toys or if they should get somethign different.

tl;dr do some goddamn parenting and interact with your kids before they all grow up and turn into SJW special snowflakes
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on August 12, 2014, 11:04:16 PM
Cracked is interesting when they shed light on otherwise obscure historical facts, beyond that their articles tend to be trite or just plain preachy. We get it John, your life sucked growing up.

:wgas:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Slacktivist on August 12, 2014, 11:33:08 PM
Maybe this'll out me as a loser but I don't really care who someone tells as long as they tell someone and are safe in the end. I'm not going to mock someone for being suicidal and afraid to tell anyone they know personally, even if it's "pathetic".

I agree since a lot of folks feeling that bad are going to figure that if they tell their friends and family that they'll lose what little support/respect they have left so they shut off an important outlet. I think basic human dignity is important and that even the most dull and pathetic person can work to turn themselves around(a little or a lot) and at least be a beneficial member of society, if an unexciting one.  A lot of current generational angst comes from people unable to cope with the fact that they are not extraordinary.

More amused that Cracked actually wrote that line out. "Hey we know the SJW crowd we appeal to has an alarming high ratio of failures who become painfully aware of it..."
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on August 13, 2014, 12:08:24 AM
I was an RA at school and had to deal with suicide stuff all the time. 9/10 it was for attention. It got kind of ridiculous where I started not giving a shit that susieQ is threatening suicide for the 3rd time this semester. Most people who commit suicide don't tell a soul about it. And It gets harder and harder to  deal with the ones who are truly suicidal and trying to get help and separate them from the ones who are doing it for attention. Like its as bad as those people who pretend to have cancer. Disgusts me on a visceral level.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on August 13, 2014, 12:16:23 AM
SusieQ got her comeuppance though my coworker was around the next time she locked herself (locked ut her roomie again too) and made threats/demands to see all of the staff and her friends over some bullshit drama. He kept it quiet and just called the cops+shrinks straight away instead of showering her with attention and concern.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on August 13, 2014, 01:15:30 AM
A friend told me about a former friend of his who would go on her Tumblr and post about wanting to overdose on pills and kill herself constantly, and then go on Skype and say "heh no way am I gonna do that, I'd miss my animes if I did :DDD". Lo and behold she's now a horribly broken 'genderqueer' social justice warrior and literally did a complete 180 from "lol fuck social justice" and laughing at 4chan making 13 year old girls cry to "fuck cis white men they are scum". She also makes posts calling her dad a "cis white man".

People who pretend to be suicidal for attention are pure garbage is what I'm saying.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on August 13, 2014, 04:06:32 AM
Being an RA was the most pozzed thing I've ever come into contact with irl. Free rent oncampus alone for like 10 hr/wk owned though.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on August 13, 2014, 08:47:32 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-terrifying-things-about-living-with-food-allergies/


I don't know if this is true about the author, but there are people who literally lie about food allergies and sensitivities because they need to feel special. My buddy used to date a girl like that. The shit she was allergic to would change week to week, we caught her stories falling apart a couple of times, (It has soy? Oh that's OK, it only makes me break out if I eat a lot of it.) She would also go on these angry tirades about recipe books and how they don't cater enough to people with allergies. Like, just substitute with stuff you're not allergic to, dipshits. Someone is literally allergic to every food.

Also, people who work in restaurants have gotten to the point where they roll their eyes when someone claims allergies because the majority of the time "I'm allergic to X" translates into "I'm trying the latest fad diet, but don't want to put the work into it" or "I don't like green peppers so I'll say I'm deathly allergic to them." People who are deathly allergic to fish are going to know that Ceaser sauce has anchovies in it.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on August 13, 2014, 09:49:58 AM
I think I said this before but there are a bunch of fat secretaries where I work and all of them without fail jump on the next bandwagon.  A while ago, it was gluten intolerance.  They made a big show about how they were allergic to gluten and how great their life is without gluten.  Except they ate gluten all the time.  These fat secretaries were like vultures and leftover donuts after meetings were over with were the carcasses.  There was one secretary in particular who did this at least a couple times to the meetings I've been so I presume she does this often enough: she slowly works her way to the donuts, loudly declares that even though she is gluten intolerant, she has been "good" so she feels she earned a couple of donuts, and then she takes the box of donuts out of the room, where I presume she hoovered them instantly.

Then they moved on to Bikram Yoga.  I doubt those fatasses ever went more than two or three times.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Mad at the Internet on August 13, 2014, 12:44:52 PM
Cracked is interesting when they shed light on otherwise obscure historical facts, beyond that their articles tend to be trite or just plain preachy. We get it John, your life sucked growing up.

:wgas:
I agree. Most of their best content isn't really the articles; it's Cracked's version of Photoshop Phriday. They're basically little factoid memes made and submitted by users. I don't know if anyone on staff at Cracked does any fact-checking on the submissions they use but it's pretty telling that the best Cracked articles aren't even written by their own fucking authors.

 :stewart:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on August 13, 2014, 03:42:40 PM
Cracked is interesting when they shed light on otherwise obscure historical facts, beyond that their articles tend to be trite or just plain preachy. We get it John, your life sucked growing up.

:wgas:
I agree. Most of their best content isn't really the articles; it's Cracked's version of Photoshop Phriday. They're basically little factoid memes made and submitted by users. I don't know if anyone on staff at Cracked does any fact-checking on the submissions they use but it's pretty telling that the best Cracked articles aren't even written by their own fucking authors.

 :stewart:

At least Cracked know how to handle Photoshop Phriday.

Cracked: "If you make the best picture, you win money! Also, forum registration is free!"

Something Awful: "Pay us so you can get to submit content that we can slap the SOMETHING AWFUL DOT COM watermark onto in order to make ourselves richer; you won't get anything substantial in return, but why would you want to when you get to live with the orgasmic knowledge that you have contributed to the smartest photoshop community on the internet? Plus, you get to fund Lowtax's next $1000 chair!"

And hell it's not even just Photoshop Phriday. So much of SA's content is user-provided it's amazing; you have Comedy Goldmine, Weekend Web posts are screenshotted by users and sometimes they literally just turn FYAD threads into front page articles.

Just take a step back and think about it for a second. SA has YOU pay THEM so that you can do work for them. This has been a thing since forever and goons have historically been stupid enough to fall for it, even during the 'golden age' that some people here get nostalgic over.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on August 14, 2014, 12:12:21 AM
one of my alts got a goldmined photoshopped thread and a mention in the photoshop friday a few months ago.

"Thanks to forums user CatAnusSurprise!"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on August 19, 2014, 08:44:01 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-sports-are-worst-thing-ever-unbiased-opinion/ beta
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Hollywood Shabat Goy Yaro on August 19, 2014, 10:36:37 PM
I love how there's no delineation between individual and team sports.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on August 20, 2014, 04:06:34 AM
jesus christ that was bad
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: [SWOLE]Grode Jar on August 20, 2014, 09:03:11 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-sports-are-worst-thing-ever-unbiased-opinion/ beta

Anytime someone complains about sports, I instantly think he's a beta and likely was bullied by jocks growing up and/or a jock fucked his girlfriend at some point (e.g. The kid from the movie Boyhood is a perfect example of this type of faggot).  These are the men who become SJWs and these are the whiteknights who excuse all terrible female behavior.  They will purposely castrate themselves just for the mere glimpse of a pussy.  It's amazing and incredibly pathetic at the time.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on August 20, 2014, 09:20:33 AM
Nerds should idolize football coaches at bare minimum. They essentially play an RTS with real people. I personally don't follow any sports team, but when I sit down to watch it (and it isn't soccer or golf), it's as entertaining as fuck.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on August 20, 2014, 09:28:22 AM
Nerds should idolize football coaches at bare minimum. They essentially play an RTS with real people. I personally don't follow any sports team, but when I sit down to watch it (and it isn't soccer or golf), it's as entertaining as fuck.

But the team owners are dirty kkkaptialist rethuglicans.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: [SWOLE]Grode Jar on August 20, 2014, 09:52:24 AM
I love how the betas' need to :ultlibrage: all SJW causes comes into direct conflict with their need to :bieber: jocks.  It's hilarious to watch their reactions when a minority athlete commits a crime.  Their brains short-circuit and they go full :confurage:. 
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Carbpoole on August 20, 2014, 01:15:46 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-sports-are-worst-thing-ever-unbiased-opinion/ beta

Quote
Scheduling your day around a game that other people play and having an emotional response to whether they win or lose seems super weird to me

Being emotionally invested in the "drafting" of a new Doctor Who, the sexual orientation of Sherlock or videogame shit: perfectly normal

And hockey rules, it's the closest thing we have to those hyper violent sports we were promised by movies from the 70's that took place in the year 2000.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Slacktivist on August 20, 2014, 01:28:26 PM
Quote
Scheduling your day around a game that other people play and having an emotional response to whether they win or lose seems super weird to me

Sports are unhealthy. Now scheduling your day around a video game that you play with nine other people and having a bitter emotional response to whether you win or lose loot and treating it like an unpaid 2nd job is totally normal.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Trump is the New Norma on August 20, 2014, 01:33:58 PM
Anytime someone complains about sports, I instantly think he's a beta and likely was bullied by jocks growing up and/or a jock fucked his girlfriend at some point (e.g. The kid from the movie Boyhood is a perfect example of this type of faggot).  These are the men who become SJWs and these are the whiteknights who excuse all terrible female behavior.  They will purposely castrate themselves just for the mere glimpse of a pussy.  It's amazing and incredibly pathetic at the time.
The SJW meta-commentary on sports is really ridiculous. It's a competition to see who can be the most sanctimonious, pious, totally-the-opposite-of-"THOSE"-sports-fans. You see it with the columnists on sites like Deadspin, Grantland, etc, and in SAS and Reddit. All they talk about is the NCAA, concussions, homophobia, on and on.

Their main focus is on viewing sports in the CORRECT way (and looking down on "typical" fans). They want to turn sports into another culture war battleground.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: [SWOLE]Grode Jar on August 20, 2014, 01:44:47 PM
They also manage to turn all sports discussion into a :parsons: and :unparsons: debate where all discussion involves a stream of 10,000 word 888s about everything BUT the actual sport itself.  Real strategy and tactics in sports is ignored by these people.  These people are by far the worst kind of sports fan.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Carbpoole on August 20, 2014, 02:17:21 PM
They also miss the simply joys, like when Plaxico Burress tucks a gun in his pants, goes out clubbing and shots himself in the foot. Or when Nick Diaz gets paid half a million for a fight and explains that all he wants is to earn enough money to buy a house, but he doesn't know what that might cost(in Stockton) or how you buy one because he was never taught those things in school.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Hollywood Shabat Goy Yaro on August 20, 2014, 02:29:12 PM
I love how the betas' need to :ultlibrage: all SJW causes comes into direct conflict with their need to :bieber: jocks.  It's hilarious to watch their reactions when a minority athlete commits a crime.  Their brains short-circuit and they go full :confurage:.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-sports-are-worst-thing-ever-unbiased-opinion/ beta

Anytime someone complains about sports, I instantly think he's a beta and likely was bullied by jocks growing up and/or a jock fucked his girlfriend at some point (e.g. The kid from the movie Boyhood is a perfect example of this type of faggot).  These are the men who become SJWs and these are the whiteknights who excuse all terrible female behavior.  They will purposely castrate themselves just for the mere glimpse of a pussy.  It's amazing and incredibly pathetic at the time.

I've said it before and I'll say it again - All progs, SJWs, and betas never got over being bullied in middle and high school which would explain why they view the world like Goddamn children.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on August 20, 2014, 04:50:54 PM
Nerds should idolize football coaches at bare minimum. They essentially play an RTS with real people. I personally don't follow any sports team, but when I sit down to watch it (and it isn't soccer or golf), it's as entertaining as fuck.

Please don't tell the nerds this, they are already faggoting up movies and vidya and everything else, keep their faggot paws off the gridiron for another 50 years or so. When I die they can have it.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: ompb on August 20, 2014, 05:37:15 PM
I love how the betas' need to :ultlibrage: all SJW causes comes into direct conflict with their need to :bieber: jocks.  It's hilarious to watch their reactions when a minority athlete commits a crime.  Their brains short-circuit and they go full :confurage:.

They think its because of racism, oppression, and concussions.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on August 20, 2014, 10:37:18 PM
Nerds should idolize football coaches at bare minimum. They essentially play an RTS with real people. I personally don't follow any sports team, but when I sit down to watch it (and it isn't soccer or golf), it's as entertaining as fuck.

Please don't tell the nerds this, they are already faggoting up movies and vidya and everything else, keep their faggot paws off the gridiron for another 50 years or so. When I die they can have it.

Sorry bro. P. soon there is going to be the sport version of that depression game
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on August 21, 2014, 02:44:29 PM
I love how the betas' need to :ultlibrage: all SJW causes comes into direct conflict with their need to :bieber: jocks.  It's hilarious to watch their reactions when a minority athlete commits a crime.  Their brains short-circuit and they go full :confurage:.

this is not English
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: New Feminist Jihad on August 21, 2014, 09:45:04 PM
I love how the betas' need to :ultlibrage: all SJW causes comes into direct conflict with their need to :bieber: jocks.  It's hilarious to watch their reactions when a minority athlete commits a crime.  Their brains short-circuit and they go full :confurage:.

this is not English
that's why I ad-blocked all the emoticons
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on August 22, 2014, 08:04:35 AM
Welcome to common core English brought to you by the inventors of common core math.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on August 28, 2014, 08:50:12 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/7-wacky-farts-that-can-help-us-understand-ferguson-mo/

Can a T-cell count go lower than zero? Click here to find out!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on August 28, 2014, 03:57:54 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/2jJTd92.jpg?1)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on August 28, 2014, 07:48:40 PM
really enjoyed the weight loss listicle on the front page that just tells you "weight loss is hard"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: castratedabomination on August 28, 2014, 07:52:16 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/7-wacky-farts-that-can-help-us-understand-ferguson-mo/

Can a T-cell count go lower than zero? Click here to find out!

lol it was originally titled "7 wacky farts that can help us understand ferguson" but now it's "7 Important Details Nobody Mentions About Ferguson"

so to answer your question: yes
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on August 29, 2014, 12:37:36 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/7-wacky-farts-that-can-help-us-understand-ferguson-mo/

Can a T-cell count go lower than zero? Click here to find out!

lol it was originally titled "7 wacky farts that can help us understand ferguson" but now it's "7 Important Details Nobody Mentions About Ferguson"

so to answer your question: yes

I think most of the cracked editors share a single t-cell, passing it around like a joint
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on September 02, 2014, 10:20:33 AM
viral load reaching critical levels.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on September 02, 2014, 10:25:18 AM
viral load reaching critical levels.

When they go as one is never supposed to go (i.e. full retard), they get called out in the comments. I guess good for them for not scrubbing it?

Regardless, each editor is likely taking viral loads to the wherever constantly.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Mullah Omar on September 02, 2014, 02:56:41 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/7-wacky-farts-that-can-help-us-understand-ferguson-mo/

Can a T-cell count go lower than zero? Click here to find out!

lol it was originally titled "7 wacky farts that can help us understand ferguson" but now it's "7 Important Details Nobody Mentions About Ferguson"

so to answer your question: yes

I think most of the cracked editors share a single t-cell, passing it around like a joint

The section on the St Louis shooting. I like how they know the knife isn't in an overhand grip from the pixels. In fact they claim he doesn't have a knife... looks like he took something out of his pocket to me but its hard to see in the higher resolution copy of the video. And his hand is in an overhand grip if those tiny pixels are a small blade. And OH MY GOD HIS 4ft DISTANCE GUESS WASN'T ACCURATE, FUCK THA PIGS.

EDIT: Hahaha they claimed he was 15 ft away. Looking at the video he is around 4ft away. Definitely closer to 4ft than 15ft. Nope, somewhere in between but I'm bad at distance estimating.

Geniuses.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on September 05, 2014, 08:53:49 AM
Dan O'Brien getting his preach on. (http://www.cracked.com/blog/what-our-reaction-to-nude-celeb-leaks-says-about-us_p2/)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on September 05, 2014, 10:00:42 AM
Dan O'Brien getting his preach on. (http://www.cracked.com/blog/what-our-reaction-to-nude-celeb-leaks-says-about-us_p2/)

Came to post this. Its the e-version of the argument that women shouldn't take any precautions to protect themselves from bad people, men need to stop being bad. He makes some stupid stealing argument.

"When you use this argument, here is what you're really saying:

Person A owned a thing. Person B stole it. Let's all blame person A for having the audacity to own a thing in the first place."

Person A owned a thing. Person B stole it. Let's all blame person A for leaving thing viewable from a window in a ghetto apartment without a deadbolt. Also person B is a dick.

Apparently fault can only completely go to one party or the other.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on September 05, 2014, 10:56:30 AM
That's what I find with all these sorts of arguments that go on online. Everything is in these absolute, black and white terms when in reality the world doesn't work that way. People and society are complex.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: weirddogtreats on September 05, 2014, 11:17:05 AM
They'll twist themselves in knots trying to make it work but basically their core belief is that in any form of human interaction that doesn't occur between people of equal "privilege" is "problematic", and the "more privileged" person is always at fault.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on September 05, 2014, 11:58:34 AM
Remember just a couple of years ago when most SJWs would swear up and down that stuff like checking white privilege and problematic speech weren't about making one party feel bad, it was just about "raising awareness" and positive behavior modification and shit? That was a fun lie while it lasted, wasn't it?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on September 05, 2014, 01:10:33 PM
Dan O'Brien getting his preach on. (http://www.cracked.com/blog/what-our-reaction-to-nude-celeb-leaks-says-about-us_p2/)

Came to post this. Its the e-version of the argument that women shouldn't take any precautions to protect themselves from bad people, men need to stop being bad. He makes some stupid stealing argument.

"When you use this argument, here is what you're really saying:

Person A owned a thing. Person B stole it. Let's all blame person A for having the audacity to own a thing in the first place."

Person A owned a thing. Person B stole it. Let's all blame person A for leaving thing viewable from a window in a ghetto apartment without a deadbolt. Also person B is a dick.

Apparently fault can only completely go to one party or the other.

These people just can't accept that there are just always going to be people out there who don't give a fuck and no amount of hand-wringing or education about rape is going to change that. There's literally no reason to not take precautions regarding your own health and safety. Until we live in a perfect world its downright stupid not to.

They'll twist themselves in knots trying to make it work but basically their core belief is that in any form of human interaction that doesn't occur between people of equal "privilege" is "problematic", and the "more privileged" person is always at fault.

Hmm I wonder who has more privilege, an internationally known multi-millionaire actress or a handful of lonely dudes jacking it in the basement  :tuss:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Justice Dredd on September 05, 2014, 01:23:57 PM
Remember just a couple of years ago when most SJWs would swear up and down that stuff like checking white privilege and problematic speech weren't about making one party feel bad, it was just about "raising awareness" and positive behavior modification and shit? That was a fun lie while it lasted, wasn't it?

remember even more years ago when proto-SJWs just wanted tolerance and that was it?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on September 05, 2014, 06:11:34 PM
They'll twist themselves in knots trying to make it work but basically their core belief is that in any form of human interaction that doesn't occur between people of equal "privilege" is "problematic", and the "more privileged" person is always at fault.

Thanks to being on the autistic spectrum and watching movies and cartoons made for kids, SJWs only can interpret the world as 100% good and 100% evil.  It's not a coincidence that there is a surge of SJW, My Little Pony fandom, Frozen fandom, and Adventure Time fandom amongs adults.  We're now a society where we can sustain the lifestyles of grown adults who are perpetual adolescents.  I just wish society stopped paying attention to them so the rest of us don't have to worry about triggering some 275 lb "male" with tits that would give you a boner if they were on a skinny chick.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Carbpoole on September 05, 2014, 06:55:20 PM
Remember just a couple of years ago when most SJWs would swear up and down that stuff like checking white privilege and problematic speech weren't about making one party feel bad, it was just about "raising awareness" and positive behavior modification and shit? That was a fun lie while it lasted, wasn't it?

remember even more years ago when proto-SJWs just wanted tolerance and that was it?

That happened in 1953, that's like 800 internet years ago.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: J Dog on September 05, 2014, 07:18:45 PM
Thanks to being on the autistic spectrum and watching movies and cartoons made for kids, SJWs only can interpret the world as 100% good and 100% evil.

"Oh look, its another south park fan who thinks the truth is in the middle."  :rolleyes:

-Goon SJW, anytime you point out that an issue might be more complicated than it seemed on last night's Daily Show

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on September 08, 2014, 06:28:48 PM
Dan O'Brien getting his preach on. (http://www.cracked.com/blog/what-our-reaction-to-nude-celeb-leaks-says-about-us_p2/)

Came to post this. Its the e-version of the argument that women shouldn't take any precautions to protect themselves from bad people, men need to stop being bad. He makes some stupid stealing argument.

"When you use this argument, here is what you're really saying:

Person A owned a thing. Person B stole it. Let's all blame person A for having the audacity to own a thing in the first place."

Person A owned a thing. Person B stole it. Let's all blame person A for leaving thing viewable from a window in a ghetto apartment without a deadbolt. Also person B is a dick.

Apparently fault can only completely go to one party or the other.

In significant sea accidents involving commercial and naval vessels, the governing body actually assigns a percentage of blame and liability to each involved party.

Kinda cool.

If the IMO was run by SJWs, the Colregs would say "whichever captain is least oppressed is at fault"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Babomb on September 08, 2014, 07:51:22 PM
Remember just a couple of years ago when most SJWs would swear up and down that stuff like checking white privilege and problematic speech weren't about making one party feel bad, it was just about "raising awareness" and positive behavior modification and shit? That was a fun lie while it lasted, wasn't it?

remember even more years ago when proto-SJWs just wanted tolerance and that was it?
Yes, I remember that was the goal.  Then it was achieved and they realized they liked power and loved making people feel guilty.

Now I just can't even comprehend how these white guilt apologest people even think, since there is no fucking way a white couple who gets beat up by 10 blacks is responsible for that.   
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on September 09, 2014, 03:19:43 AM
In significant sea accidents involving commercial and naval vessels, the governing body actually assigns a percentage of blame and liability to each involved party.

Kinda cool.

If the IMO was run by SJWs, the Colregs would say "whichever captain is least oppressed is at fault"

Chinese traffic cops can do the same thing, and the percentages don't have to add to 100% - you can go over or under.

Before you start saying that's because cops can't do math, remember that these cops are asians, so OWNED.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Niggerdeath Hugbox on September 09, 2014, 04:05:31 PM
remember even more years ago when proto-SJWs just wanted tolerance and that was it?
Yes, I remember that was the goal.  Then it was achieved and they realized they liked power and loved making people feel guilty.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on September 12, 2014, 04:49:20 PM
In significant sea accidents involving commercial and naval vessels, the governing body actually assigns a percentage of blame and liability to each involved party.

Kinda cool.

If the IMO was run by SJWs, the Colregs would say "whichever captain is least oppressed is at fault"

Chinese traffic cops can do the same thing, and the percentages don't have to add to 100% - you can go over or under.

Before you start saying that's because cops can't do math, remember that these cops are asians, so OWNED.

"White man is 150 percent guirty!"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OZMA CURES HAM on September 12, 2014, 08:41:59 PM
"White man is 150 percent guirty!"
"writu mannu eez one hundred and fifty percent guirty!"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on September 12, 2014, 09:10:24 PM
"White man is 150 percent guirty!"
"writu mannu eez one hundred and fifty percent guirty!"

Wrong chingchongs. a shameful klansman.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OZMA CURES HAM on September 12, 2014, 10:30:49 PM
They all talk alike to me.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on September 13, 2014, 09:11:40 AM
(http://i.imgur.com/LSv306e.png)


NO FUCKING WAY!!!!
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Niggerdeath Hugbox on September 13, 2014, 03:33:00 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/LSv306e.png)


NO FUCKING WAY!!!!

Welcome to the PewDiePie economy of effortless profit.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on September 14, 2014, 12:03:57 AM
"White man is 150 percent guirty!"
"writu mannu eez one hundred and fifty percent guirty!"

Wrong chingchongs. a shameful klansman.

I knew somebody was going to bring that up. Some autistic faggot who insists on factual veracity in his hatespeech humor.

You disappoint me, Ghoste.

E: But you are as my brother and I will always find it in my heart to forgive you.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: DreddBOSS on September 14, 2014, 02:46:44 AM
"White man is 150 percent guirty!"
"writu mannu eez one hundred and fifty percent guirty!"

Wrong chingchongs. a shameful klansman.

I knew somebody was going to bring that up. Some autistic faggot who insists on factual veracity in his hatespeech humor.

You disappoint me, Ghoste.

E: But you are as my brother and I will always find it in my heart to forgive you.

Also, your average chinaman don't have trouble pronouncing their L's.   :evola:

Luckily for your bigot educational purposes, I neither require nor need forgiveness.  :colbert:

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on September 14, 2014, 05:42:22 AM
"White man is 150 percent guirty!"
"writu mannu eez one hundred and fifty percent guirty!"

Wrong chingchongs. a shameful klansman.

I knew somebody was going to bring that up. Some autistic faggot who insists on factual veracity in his hatespeech humor.

You disappoint me, Ghoste.

E: But you are as my brother and I will always find it in my heart to forgive you.

Hating things for real reasons and not made up feels is all that separates us from liberals.

Well, that and jobs.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: unprivsplain on September 14, 2014, 10:05:43 AM
Not exactly cracked, but worthless click bate sites:
(http://i.imgur.com/49n6BX2.jpg)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Chael P Sonnen on September 14, 2014, 10:11:31 AM
theres an article today about a child sex slave

its not even like positively sjw but man what the fuck happened to "5 wacky coincidences!!!" or the okay seanbaby articles
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on September 14, 2014, 10:32:58 AM
Quote
There were (and probably still are) these fetishist chat rooms on Yahoo, where my mom would just go in and start dropping code words to determine if the guy really wanted to pay for my time or if he was just a random pervert. There was a whole system for the discerning customers: "Snow White" meant a dark-haired girl with pale skin; "Sleeping Beauty" meant a blond-haired, blue-eyed girl; "Strawberry Shortcake" meant a redhead; "Oreos" were black or mixed-race girls; "Fortune Cookies" were Asian girls. If that sounds incredibly racist, or downright silly, you're right. No one's accusing the dudes who buy children of being mature adults.

Yup the worst thing about this is the racist code words. Are you fucking shitting me

:megatuss:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on September 14, 2014, 10:38:25 AM
"Just be white to the gentlemen Fancy, and they'll be white to you."
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on September 14, 2014, 11:20:28 AM
Quote
There were (and probably still are) these fetishist chat rooms on Yahoo, where my mom would just go in and start dropping code words to determine if the guy really wanted to pay for my time or if he was just a random pervert. There was a whole system for the discerning customers: "Snow White" meant a dark-haired girl with pale skin; "Sleeping Beauty" meant a blond-haired, blue-eyed girl; "Strawberry Shortcake" meant a redhead; "Oreos" were black or mixed-race girls; "Fortune Cookies" were Asian girls. If that sounds incredibly racist, or downright silly, you're right. No one's accusing the dudes who buy children of being mature adults.

Yup the worst thing about this is the racist code words. Are you fucking shitting me

:megatuss:

Eh, I could see it coming from an actual molestation/trafficking victim. Abuse victims often focus on other details to avoid grappling with the big bad.

The article sounds like stdh, though.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on September 14, 2014, 12:14:33 PM
I think Wong personally edits all the guests articles so I can see it being one of his shittastic contributions. I get they were probably just trying to lighten the mood, though.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on September 14, 2014, 01:07:20 PM
I think Wong personally edits all the guests articles so I can see it being one of his shittastic contributions. I get they were probably just trying to lighten the mood, though.

Well yeah, we really need to lighten up our horrific stories of sexual slavery and horrendous child abuse. Otherwise they'd just be fucking morbid.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on September 14, 2014, 02:04:17 PM
Cracked is rapidly turning into the Reader's Digest of the internet.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on September 14, 2014, 06:27:29 PM
Cracked is rapidly turning into the Reader's Digest of the internet.

Even now Reader's Digest still makes for some funny bathroom reading. Cracked is what comes out the other end.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on September 15, 2014, 02:00:13 AM
I actually looked at cracked a few days ago (?) with the "badass quotes" thing from soldiers; for a minute I thought they'd gotten their shit together.

:lolno:

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Jack Ruby on September 16, 2014, 08:09:32 AM
Time to rephrase the thread title so it's no longer a question. (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-things-i-learned-as-internets-most-hated-person/)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OZMA CURES HAM on September 16, 2014, 08:38:22 AM
Time to rephrase the thread title so it's no longer a question. (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-things-i-learned-as-internets-most-hated-person/)
21 trackers on that page.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on September 16, 2014, 08:43:47 AM
Time to rephrase the thread title so it's no longer a question. (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-things-i-learned-as-internets-most-hated-person/)

I wonder if she'll admit to doing anything questionable or wrong or lol what am I thinking.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on September 16, 2014, 10:02:05 AM
Here, I rewrote the article for you Zoe:

Well, I cheated on my boyfriend with five guys (at least) to get my 1990's style html choose your own adventure game published/reviewed. I also took nude pictures for a website. How could all of these problems that I am complaining about be prevented? and how dare internet people distribute the nude internet pictures that I put on the an internet website featuring nude people.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on September 16, 2014, 10:16:48 AM
The Indie game scene is a few gems stewing in a festering pile of self-aggrandizement and shit.

I made more complex game in my C++ class in High School, I am literally more of a developer than Zoe Quinn is.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on September 16, 2014, 10:18:50 AM
Here, I rewrote the article for you Zoe:

Well, I cheated on my boyfriend with five guys (at least) to get my 1990's style html choose your own adventure game published/reviewed. I also took nude pictures for a website. How could all of these problems that I am complaining about be prevented? and how dare internet people distribute the nude internet pictures that I put on the an internet website featuring nude people.

Excuse me, you sexist piece of shit. I think you'll find that none of the people she slept with actually reviewed her game. They just promoted it. There is a big difference.

 :goon:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on September 16, 2014, 10:41:44 AM
Isn't it weird how women who have actually made real contributions in the field don't define themselves by their gender  :adam:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on September 16, 2014, 01:11:46 PM
Isn't it weird how women who have actually made real contributions in the field don't define themselves by their gender  :adam:

Buncha Aunt Toms.  :colbert:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on September 16, 2014, 01:38:50 PM
I wonder if there's still a guy at Cracked with a pile of classic Cracked content that was actually interesting to read like "10 Greatest Movies You Didn't Know Were Remakes" waiting to publish and slowly getting edged out by "Six Reasons Sex Slavery is Actually Bad" until he quits so they don't have to pay him unemployment
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Mad at the Internet on September 16, 2014, 02:22:44 PM
No matter what Cracked has devolved into in the modern era, I'll always remember it as a second-rate alternative to MAD magazine. I liked Bill Ward's and John Severin's art.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on September 16, 2014, 03:00:28 PM
I wonder if there's still a guy at Cracked with a pile of classic Cracked content that was actually interesting to read like "10 Greatest Movies You Didn't Know Were Remakes" waiting to publish and slowly getting edged out by "Six Reasons Sex Slavery is Actually Bad" until he quits so they don't have to pay him unemployment

They are retarded not diversifying and keeping the humor site and the sjw site. The google researched film, music, game, war articles are usually at least somewhat entertaining. It seems like when I find myself actually lolling at cracked, its usually a submitted article that david "so white it's" wong or whoever didn't completely halal the humor out of. It's approaching more entertaining to read the poorly researched/written popculture clickbait articles/picture galleries.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on September 16, 2014, 03:42:50 PM
Time to rephrase the thread title so it's no longer a question. (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-things-i-learned-as-internets-most-hated-person/)
21 trackers on that page.

install ghostery
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Obese-n-Triggered on September 16, 2014, 08:22:32 PM
Time to rephrase the thread title so it's no longer a question. (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-things-i-learned-as-internets-most-hated-person/)
21 trackers on that page.

install ghostery

Thanks for this! 
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on September 16, 2014, 11:29:22 PM
No surprise here, but they're totally shameless about this shit

(http://i.imgur.com/FeXS3uH.png)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on September 17, 2014, 12:21:56 AM
must be nice getting paid for sitting on a toilet
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OZMA CURES HAM on September 17, 2014, 04:00:15 AM
Time to rephrase the thread title so it's no longer a question. (http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-things-i-learned-as-internets-most-hated-person/)
21 trackers on that page.

install ghostery
That's how I knew there were 21 trackers. :reagan:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on September 17, 2014, 09:44:23 AM
(http://i.imgur.com/t6OAUlS.png)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Mad at the Internet on September 17, 2014, 11:25:20 AM
(http://i.imgur.com/t6OAUlS.png)

WTF is up with imgur lately?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on September 17, 2014, 01:57:54 PM
Goon writes article for Cracked, the Circle of Poz is complete and the Pozageddon can officially begin.

Ozma will be Famine, EPG will be Pestilence, Grover will be War, and Vilerat will be Death.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on September 17, 2014, 02:20:48 PM
Goon writes article for Cracked, the Circle of Poz is complete and the Pozageddon can officially begin.

Ozma will be Famine, EPG will be Pestilence, Grover will be War, and Vilerat will be Death.
:kaneclap:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on September 18, 2014, 08:57:10 AM
Did anyone post this yet?

Extreme:  :david:

4 Ways Gamers Still Suck at Dealing With Women (http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-ways-gamers-still-suck-at-dealing-with-women/)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: URANIUM CURES HIPPIES on September 18, 2014, 10:13:42 AM
http://www.donotlink.com/

Don't give them any clicks.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: freak puke on September 18, 2014, 08:15:09 PM
Did anyone post this yet?

Extreme:  :david:

4 Ways Gamers Still Suck at Dealing With Women (http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-ways-gamers-still-suck-at-dealing-with-women/)


All you need to know about this "article" is that he cited Encyclopedia Dramatica.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on September 22, 2014, 09:44:01 PM
So you might recall the Gawker media clickbait sites had a recent kerfluffle when their SJW writers and mods had a meltdown because of the triggering meanthoughts and badfeels in their comments sections. Basically people could write all sorts of "problematic" sexist, racist, homophobic, etc stuff as well as posting nekkid pictures of women which were DEGRADING and NOT EMPOWERING, so the writers were threatening to quit.

Their "solution" was to hide unapproved comments, but someone has to approve them. Won't those people get triggererd too?  :parsons:

So since the writers are afraid to read the comments, and the moderators are too, they are now doing this:
http://io9.com/do-you-want-to-help-create-a-good-commenter-community-o-1637729716

Quote
We're looking for people who would like to help make the comments on io9 posts more useful. You can do that by volunteering to help bring comments out of the "pending" zone and into the light.

Here's how it works. You post in comments below about why you'd like to help (just a sentence or two is fine). If your reasoning is sound, we'll magically make you one of the commenters who is "followed" by io9. Followed commenters can pull comments out the "pending" section by starring or replying to them. That means you can help shape the conversation, and make sure more people are able to participate.

Want to volunteer? Just tell us why in comments and join this follow party!

So now they will have "superusers" who will volunteer to be triggered by the horrors of unmoderated comments to protect the pearl clutching :christina: s and :goonette: s .

Here's what the hoi polloi thinks:
Quote
I'm already followed (yay!) but I was wondering if you guys ever review the activity of those already on the list? I was pretty disheartened last week to see a lot of sexist grey comments get starred on Rob's 10 Stupid Arguments article.

I mean, I went forth and braved the greys, saw a lot of bs sexism, so I clicked away and when I came back, multiple people had starred that shit black. And then people engaged with the trolls and whatnot. I don't mean the at least reasonably written comments either, I mean comments using the word feminazi.
:bieber:

"braved the greys" means they girded their loins and waded forth into the horrors of unmoderated triggering comments.

Quote
something I would like to see is for the 'moderation' to work both ways—not just that the reader is able to star people out of the greys, but also the reader can hide or grey out commenters that they find distasteful or insulting.
:ozma:

Keep in mind that this is being set up by the mods so that they don't have to moderate. :swanson:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Monostats Infected Scrotum on September 22, 2014, 10:24:49 PM
So you might recall the Gawker media clickbait sites had a recent kerfluffle when their SJW writers and mods had a meltdown because of the triggering meanthoughts and badfeels in their comments sections. Basically people could write all sorts of "problematic" sexist, racist, homophobic, etc stuff as well as posting nekkid pictures of women which were DEGRADING and NOT EMPOWERING, so the writers were threatening to quit.

Their "solution" was to hide unapproved comments, but someone has to approve them. Won't those people get triggererd too?  :parsons:

So since the writers are afraid to read the comments, and the moderators are too, they are now doing this:
http://io9.com/do-you-want-to-help-create-a-good-commenter-community-o-1637729716

Quote
We're looking for people who would like to help make the comments on io9 posts more useful. You can do that by volunteering to help bring comments out of the "pending" zone and into the light.

Here's how it works. You post in comments below about why you'd like to help (just a sentence or two is fine). If your reasoning is sound, we'll magically make you one of the commenters who is "followed" by io9. Followed commenters can pull comments out the "pending" section by starring or replying to them. That means you can help shape the conversation, and make sure more people are able to participate.

Want to volunteer? Just tell us why in comments and join this follow party!

So now they will have "superusers" who will volunteer to be triggered by the horrors of unmoderated comments to protect the pearl clutching :christina: s and :goonette: s .

Here's what the hoi polloi thinks:
Quote
I'm already followed (yay!) but I was wondering if you guys ever review the activity of those already on the list? I was pretty disheartened last week to see a lot of sexist grey comments get starred on Rob's 10 Stupid Arguments article.

I mean, I went forth and braved the greys, saw a lot of bs sexism, so I clicked away and when I came back, multiple people had starred that shit black. And then people engaged with the trolls and whatnot. I don't mean the at least reasonably written comments either, I mean comments using the word feminazi.
:bieber:

"braved the greys" means they girded their loins and waded forth into the horrors of unmoderated triggering comments.

Quote
something I would like to see is for the 'moderation' to work both ways—not just that the reader is able to star people out of the greys, but also the reader can hide or grey out commenters that they find distasteful or insulting.
:ozma:

Keep in mind that this is being set up by the mods so that they don't have to moderate. :swanson:

What a bunch of dickless faggots.  :clint:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OZMA CURES HAM on September 22, 2014, 10:28:30 PM
I would volunteer to be a super whatever and approve everything in the queue, but that would mean having to visit gawker sites. Fuck that noise.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on September 22, 2014, 11:40:59 PM
"What did you do in the Great War, gender-unspec parent?"

(With pain in xir eyes) "I braved the greys, gender-unspec child. I braved the greys."
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on September 23, 2014, 12:12:41 AM
I would volunteer to be a super whatever and approve everything in the queue, but that would mean having to visit gawker sites. Fuck that noise.

Worm your way in and then only approve those "I MAKE $600 A DAY WORKING FROM HOME CLICK HERE TO SEE HOW!!!!" spambots.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Trump is the New Norma on September 23, 2014, 01:40:45 AM
Much like in the early days of the internet where "UNCENSORED OPINIONS" were a huge draw, we'll circle back around to where it'll be cool to be edgy again.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on September 24, 2014, 12:16:15 PM
Seriously there is. I imagine something humorous/interesting like this ancient cracked piece from 2010 (http://www.cracked.com/article_18753_the-6-most-creative-abuses-loopholes.html) would really stand out now.  No agenda, not trying too hard with the humor, 6 legit interesting stories.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pyongyangs finest on September 24, 2014, 06:22:56 PM
So now they will have "superusers" who will volunteer to be triggered by the horrors of unmoderated comments to protect the pearl clutching :christina: s and :goonette: s .

Brilliant. The bean counters in management must have been jumping for joy when this “controversy” happened. I’d love to have been a fly on the wall in that staff meeting:

 :christina: “In the name of social justice, I demand that my job description be outsourced to unpaid volunteers working for e-cred!”

 :draper: “We agree completely. All that time spent literally shaking was hindering your writing output, so now that you no longer have to read the comments, we’ve doubled your weekly pageview and word count quotas.”

:christina: “Do I get a raise?”

:draper: “No.”
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on September 25, 2014, 12:16:36 AM
Amazing how in the years between SASS and SS these people have gone from reading every troll post and trying to respond with catlady burns to just going "we're pre-trolled to the point were comments existing is a potential trigger"


"What did you do in the Great War, gender-unspec parent?"

(With pain in xir eyes) "I braved the greys, gender-unspec child. I braved the greys."


hahaha 'gender-unspec parent'  :nixon:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on September 25, 2014, 10:47:17 AM
Wow Cracked really fucking loves Zoe Quinn :stare:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on September 25, 2014, 12:26:00 PM
Wow Cracked really fucking loves Zoe Quinn :stare:

Holy Fuck, sjw are out in full force in the comments. Every time someone says, "I think we are only getting one side of the story here." Like three come out of the woodwork to says, "There are only two sides, the criminals and the victim."
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on September 25, 2014, 01:15:41 PM
The victim that makes 3K a month for doing nothing.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on September 25, 2014, 01:46:41 PM
I think this person sleeps with people for press. I guess I am a criminal too now.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Niggerdeath Hugbox on September 25, 2014, 04:13:36 PM
I think this person sleeps with people for press. I guess I am a criminal too now.

It's called thoughtcrime look it up :swanson:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on September 26, 2014, 08:59:00 PM
I think this person sleeps with people for press. I guess I am a criminal too now.

Thats some pretty gross misogyny there, bro :smug:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on October 04, 2014, 10:37:55 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-you-should-be-in-mixed-race-relationship/


 :swanson:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: ompb on October 04, 2014, 12:32:38 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-you-should-be-in-mixed-race-relationship/


 :swanson:

I wanna go down there with a bat.

 :clint:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on October 04, 2014, 12:39:41 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-you-should-be-in-mixed-race-relationship/


 :swanson:

I wanna go down there with a bat.

 :clint:

(http://i.imgur.com/YZbDaAP.png)

Yeah lets mix German, English, and French genes with that.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OZMA CURES HAM on October 04, 2014, 01:12:03 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-you-should-be-in-mixed-race-relationship/
Fuck you, I won't fuck who you tell me. :madgoon:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on October 04, 2014, 01:42:56 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-you-should-be-in-mixed-race-relationship/


 :swanson:

:nazibrain:

It feels like society is actively working to make me more racist*. #2 on that list is "It's the only thing that will literally get rid of race." I don't WANT to get rid of different races. Having different races is pretty neat. My heritage is almost pure German with a tiny bit of English sprinkled in for extra Imperialist flavor flavour, and the media is bombarding us with shit like this article.

*"racist" like Muhammad Ali in that interview clip I posted the other day.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on October 04, 2014, 02:57:21 PM
There will never be an end to race/ethnic hierarchy as we know it.  In the event that absolutely nobody is white, black, etc, half breeds will start determining which other half breeds are better.  Basically like Latin America. 
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: J Dog on October 04, 2014, 03:10:43 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-you-should-be-in-mixed-race-relationship/


 :swanson:

Which races chew with their mouths closed, because I only want to eat with them.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on October 04, 2014, 03:20:31 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-you-should-be-in-mixed-race-relationship/


 :swanson:

Which races chew with their mouths closed, because I only want to eat with them.

Also can they please be the ones that don't wipe their asses with their bare hands?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Niggerdeath Hugbox on October 04, 2014, 05:26:46 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-you-should-be-in-mixed-race-relationship/

Allow me to write a much better article on the subject.

1 Reasons You Should Be in Mixed Race Relationship

1. It produces the hottest offspring.

There. Anything else is just wasted words.

There will never be an end to race/ethnic hierarchy as we know it.  In the event that absolutely nobody is white, black, etc, half breeds will start determining which other half breeds are better.  Basically like Latin America.

Hotel Rwanda 2194

It feels like society is actively working to make me more racist*. #2 on that list is "It's the only thing that will literally get rid of race." I don't WANT to get rid of different races. Having different races is pretty neat. My heritage is almost pure German with a tiny bit of English sprinkled in for extra Imperialist flavor flavour, and the media is bombarding us with shit like this article.

*"racist" like Muhammad Ali in that interview clip I posted the other day.

You could say that wanting to breed individual races out is a bit... racist. :adam:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: There's No Way Somebody can be that Fat and not be Gay on October 04, 2014, 07:37:07 PM
I could swear Crack markets itself as a comedy site, but I'm just not seeing the humour in that cringe-inducing liberal vomit with no basis in reality.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on October 04, 2014, 08:25:59 PM
I could swear Crack markets itself as a comedy site, but I'm just not seeing the humour in that cringe-inducing liberal vomit with no basis in reality.

they removed the thing under the logo calling it a comedy site months ago
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Niggerdeath Hugbox on October 04, 2014, 08:47:29 PM
I could swear Crack markets itself as a comedy site, but I'm just not seeing the humour in that cringe-inducing liberal vomit with no basis in reality.

they removed the thing under the logo calling it a comedy site months ago

Kind of like how "MUSIC TELEVISION" was reduced to fine print by 2002. Cracked and SA are to comedy what MTV is to music these days.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: freak puke on October 04, 2014, 08:48:20 PM
Apparently Wong has been taking pointers from Lowtax for quite a while now. (http://thecommentsection.org/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=1502)

Also:

(http://i.imgur.com/4uJHHiK.png)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Aran on October 04, 2014, 10:44:23 PM
Allow me to write a much better article on the subject.

1 Reasons You Should Be in Mixed Race Relationship

1. You found a person of another race you're interested in.

There. Anything else is just wasted words.


Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on October 04, 2014, 11:07:06 PM
but doesn't SJW thoughtcrime include white people who are attracted to other races? Like if you're white and want to bang asian or black girls, you're racist scum with internalized pedophilic/slaveowner tendencies
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: DreddBOSS on October 04, 2014, 11:20:29 PM
but doesn't SJW thoughtcrime include white people who are attracted to other races? Like if you're white and want to bang asian or black girls, you're racist scum with internalized pedophilic/slaveowner tendencies

Sounds right; not to mention white people not being instantly attracted to those outside the race are racist.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OZMA CURES HAM on October 04, 2014, 11:36:19 PM
Apparently Wong has been taking pointers from Lowtax for quite a while now. (http://thecommentsection.org/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=1502)
They ban people for using adblock? Gaaaaaaaaaaay.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Niggerdeath Hugbox on October 05, 2014, 12:09:46 AM
but doesn't SJW thoughtcrime include white people who are attracted to other races? Like if you're white and want to bang asian or black girls, you're racist scum with internalized pedophilic/slaveowner tendencies

Sort of; banging black women means you're open-minded and can appreciate lesser-established manifestations of feminine beauty and culture. Banging Asian women means you're a patriarchal, misogynistic loser attracted to women deemed "weaker" and more "submissive" by society.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Floridian on October 05, 2014, 12:28:59 AM
but doesn't SJW thoughtcrime include white people who are attracted to other races? Like if you're white and want to bang asian or black girls, you're racist scum with internalized pedophilic/slaveowner tendencies

Sounds right; not to mention white people not being instantly attracted to those outside the race are racist.

Goons get really passive aggressively :ultlibrage: whenever white guys date nonwhite girls when the subject at hand comes up.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on October 06, 2014, 09:09:04 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-you-should-be-in-mixed-race-relationship/

Allow me to write a much better article on the subject.

1 Reasons You Should Be in Mixed Race Relationship

1. It produces the hottest offspring.

There. Anything else is just wasted words.

1. Look to the 5 foot tall, 200 lbs., shit-colored squat monsters with the scruffy adolescent male mustaches lined up outside your local "Home Depot" to cure you of the idea that race-mixing creates "HOT OFFSPRING."

2. Or better yet, just go to Brazil and take a look at all the fat-ass mulattoes they've got down there. They're not as hot as advertised.

3. (http://i1.mirror.co.uk/incoming/article3602550.ece/alternates/s2197/Elliot-Rodger.jpg)

There will never be an end to race/ethnic hierarchy as we know it.  In the event that absolutely nobody is white, black, etc, half breeds will start determining which other half breeds are better.  Basically like Latin America.

Hotel Rwanda 2194

It feels like society is actively working to make me more racist*. #2 on that list is "It's the only thing that will literally get rid of race." I don't WANT to get rid of different races. Having different races is pretty neat. My heritage is almost pure German with a tiny bit of English sprinkled in for extra Imperialist flavor flavour, and the media is bombarding us with shit like this article.

*"racist" like Muhammad Ali in that interview clip I posted the other day.

You could say that wanting to breed individual races out is a bit... racist. :adam:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on October 06, 2014, 09:12:47 AM
Naturally, the CRACKED dipshits think it's important to "get rid of race" so nobody will be racist. Eh, well, what are these raceless cocksuckers gonna do when they learn that the Muslim mulattoes still wanna kill all the non-Muslim mulattoes?

WE STILL GOT THAT FUCKIN' RELIGION PROBLEM

And plus, you'll still have white Jews, unless you're planning to gas them again. You'll never pressure a bunch of Satmar Hasidics into letting their daughters fuck niggers.

In the end, nobody really wants a half-nigger China or a half-white Africa. All the "multicultural" SJWs really want, when you get to the core of their desires, is for white people* to be DEAD, DEAD, DEAD, and DEADER than the fucking dodo bird. And if not dead, then some sort of situation where they're enslaved, impoverished, helpless, and otherwise suffering in some grim fashion or other.

And that's it.


*straight white people, anyway.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on October 06, 2014, 09:21:41 AM
To me, saying you're going to get rid of race is the same as saying, "Oh, let's get rid of blond hair," or "Let's get rid of green eyes."
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on October 06, 2014, 09:28:37 AM
To me, saying you're going to get rid of race is the same as saying, "Oh, let's get rid of blond hair," or "Let's get rid of green eyes."

What is saying "let's get rid of all SJWs" the same as saying?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on October 06, 2014, 09:31:20 AM
"I am a normal functional human being, what the fuck is wrong with you?"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on October 06, 2014, 09:57:49 AM
To me, saying you're going to get rid of race is the same as saying, "Oh, let's get rid of blond hair," or "Let's get rid of green eyes."

What is saying "let's get rid of all SJWs" the same as saying?

"I crapped my pants, better wash my pants"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Babomb on October 06, 2014, 12:46:28 PM
but doesn't SJW thoughtcrime include white people who are attracted to other races? Like if you're white and want to bang asian or black girls, you're racist scum with internalized pedophilic/slaveowner tendencies

Sort of; banging black women means you're open-minded and can appreciate lesser-established manifestations of feminine beauty and culture. Banging Asian women means you're a patriarchal, misogynistic loser attracted to women deemed "weaker" and more "submissive" by society.
But banging a black woman is shoving your CIS white opressionist penis in her.  Whites males can only go as far as wanting to bang black women, if they actually do  they are racist scum trying to enslave them.  White women must reject white men and go for darler men, and white males need to stop opressing women of color before they can actually penetrate one.  But we all know that just by having a penis white men are opressing women and just by being white they are opressing people of color.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on October 06, 2014, 01:49:55 PM
So basically, white women have to bang people of other races, while white men are supposed to keep their dicks in their hand and watch because they are the root of all evil and must not pass on their nazi dna. Repeat until there are no white people left. Have I got that right?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Monostats Infected Scrotum on October 06, 2014, 01:59:15 PM
So basically, white women have to bang people of other races, while white men are supposed to keep their dicks in their hand and watch because they are the root of all evil and must not pass on their nazi dna. Repeat until there are no white people left. Have I got that right?

White men have been oppressors since time immemorial. They must be eliminated if bigotry is to cease.
 :say:
 :goon:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Carbpoole on October 06, 2014, 02:17:32 PM
So basically, white women have to bang people of other races, while white men are supposed to keep their dicks in their hand and watch because they are the root of all evil and must not pass on their nazi dna. Repeat until there are no white people left. Have I got that right?

I read a column in a newspaper some years ago, it was written by a pozzed white lady and it was about the straw that broke the camels back - when things just got too pozzed for her.

She and a bunch of colleagues from around the country where getting together for some white women's middle-management/age conference or something and a bunch of them got together during a break for coffee and chatting. Anyway, it turns out one of the women recently had a baby. She pulled out her phone, pulled up the picture and it got passed around. Lots of "aaaw how cute" as you'd expect, but when a couple of women who apparently knew each other got the phone/picture they snarked "oh, it's just a white baby, how boring".
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on October 06, 2014, 02:54:39 PM
So basically, white women have to bang people of other races, while white men are supposed to keep their dicks in their hand and watch because they are the root of all evil and must not pass on their nazi dna. Repeat until there are no white people left. Have I got that right?

I was watching something last night, and they had images of a small city meant to be all at harmony and idyllic, 888 blah blah. So of course it showed an interracial couple, and it was a black dude and a white girl: you almost never see the reverse, and never as a 5 second diversity shot. If they do have a white man and black woman, its central to the plot.

So its just another case of white women saying they are the pinnacle of human beauty; why would that noble negro want to spend time with the frog-eyed nappy-haired Preciouses of his own race?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Mad at the Internet on October 06, 2014, 03:06:13 PM
just a white baby

Like everyone else, I see a lot of pics of friends' babies on FB. I rarely see black babies as I have few black friends and they're all well past child-rearing age anyhow. So I see mostly white chilrenz but I do have a couple of mixed-race couples as friends (white husband/black wife) and at least one young white lady who got muh dikked and stuck with sole custody of her nigger babby. The truth of the matter is that the white babies are the best looking hands down. I have another friend couple who is a white dude plus a half white/black girl and their baby is almost 100% white so they get a pass because she's cute and looks more white than black.

Anyhow, white babies best babies.  :nixon:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on October 06, 2014, 03:17:10 PM
"I have a few black friends" would be a funny SS username
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on October 06, 2014, 05:04:20 PM
"I have a few black friends" would be a funny SS username

I made the avatar and custom title:


Yeah, that's the ticket!
 :say:
(http://i.imgur.com/mhotg3Z.png)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on October 06, 2014, 06:16:29 PM
Wired has been oozing of pozz lately.

Today's example:

The Conference That's Trying to Crack Tech's Race Problem (http://www.wired.com/2014/10/focus100/)

It takes a special kind of idiocy to look at the tech industry and claim that it has a race problem.

Tech companies are fucking DYING to hire minorities.

The only reasonable conclusion to make from the statistic "Less than 2% of silicon valley workers are black" is "Black culture produces a very small number of qualified tech industry workers"

This isn't "Tech's Race Problem", it's Race's Tech Problem.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on October 06, 2014, 06:28:47 PM
So basically, white women have to bang people of other races, while white men are supposed to keep their dicks in their hand and watch because they are the root of all evil and must not pass on their nazi dna. Repeat until there are no white people left. Have I got that right?

I'm pretty sure that post is enough to earn you a doctorate somewhere these days.

Edit: That'll be $75,000 please.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Niggerdeath Hugbox on October 06, 2014, 08:38:25 PM
Wired has been oozing of pozz lately.

Today's example:

The Conference That's Trying to Crack Tech's Race Problem (http://www.wired.com/2014/10/focus100/)

It takes a special kind of idiocy to look at the tech industry and claim that it has a race problem.

Tech companies are fucking DYING to hire minorities.

The only reasonable conclusion to make from the statistic "Less than 2% of silicon valley workers are black" is "Black culture produces a very small number of qualified tech industry workers"

This isn't "Tech's Race Problem", it's Race's Tech Problem.

I wonder how many Latinos are in tech. Bet its more than the Afros. Maybe because there's more of them near the Silicon Valley area?

These are the kinds of people that would start a sitcom in Utah and make the cast half black against all real-world logic.

Obviously this doesn't explain AzN's but you get the idea.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: J Dog on October 06, 2014, 09:10:37 PM
Tech companies are fucking DYING to hire minorities.

*besides Asians, who make up the majority of tech workers. 

Also, 
(http://i.imgur.com/Pcb77pF.jpg)

:lilal:

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: freak puke on October 06, 2014, 09:33:21 PM
Wired has been oozing of pozz lately.

Today's example:

The Conference That's Trying to Crack Tech's Race Problem (http://www.wired.com/2014/10/focus100/)

It takes a special kind of idiocy to look at the tech industry and claim that it has a race problem.

Tech companies are fucking DYING to hire minorities.

The only reasonable conclusion to make from the statistic "Less than 2% of silicon valley workers are black" is "Black culture produces a very small number of qualified tech industry workers"

This isn't "Tech's Race Problem", it's Race's Tech Problem.

I gave up on Wired when I found out they listed Cody Wilson as the 14th most dangerous person in the world. (http://www.wired.com/2012/12/most-dangerous-people/?pid=1696#slideid-1696)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: ompb on October 06, 2014, 09:56:16 PM
Also, 
(http://i.imgur.com/Pcb77pF.jpg)


 :stewart:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on October 06, 2014, 10:21:57 PM
The dirty secret behind all this hand-wringing is that to hit the magic quotas they're going to have to penalize asians.

As far as most liberals are concerned, Asians have joined Jews in the ranks of "not the sort of minority we like" and so they just get lumped in with the "oppressor class" in all practical matters except for a few tokens they throw to perma-students ala Suey Park.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on October 06, 2014, 11:49:15 PM
The lawsuits against universities' affirmative action policies are always launched by Asians. To be fair, it must suck to spend an entire childhood locked in your room with extra math homework, a cello, and some reeking seafood for a snack. No wonder they top themselves so much more.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: OZMA CURES HAM on October 07, 2014, 12:16:11 AM
I gave up on Wired when I found out they listed Cody Wilson as the 14th most dangerous person in the world. (http://www.wired.com/2012/12/most-dangerous-people/?pid=1696#slideid-1696)
With this thousand dollar piece of finicky electronics, you too can build an unreliable firearm that might blow up in your hands! THE STREETS WILL RUN RED WITH BLOOD.

Or you can stick a shotgun shell in a pipe and hit it with a nail.

We need a libfag wringing his hands while thinking of the children emote.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Bitter Weirdo on October 07, 2014, 12:52:45 AM

Or you can stick a shotgun shell in a pipe and hit it with a nail.


Heh. I've got that book too   :salute:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Niggerdeath Hugbox on October 07, 2014, 01:12:20 AM
Tech companies are fucking DYING to hire minorities.

*besides Asians, who make up the majority of tech workers. 

Also, 
(http://i.imgur.com/Pcb77pF.jpg)

:lilal:

848y 607 84ck
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Linebacker in a Dress on October 07, 2014, 11:56:03 AM
But banging a black woman is shoving your CIS white opressionist penis in her.  Whites males can only go as far as wanting to bang black women, if they actually do  they are racist scum trying to enslave them. 

However, actually enslaving black women and mentally/physically abusing them is very much approved and acceptable behavior in the SJW set.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on October 13, 2014, 12:28:14 AM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21329_5-tiny-common-sense-changes-that-would-save-world.html

 :lolno:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on October 13, 2014, 12:47:14 AM
good god

Quote
And in case you're assuming that because something works in Germany (where they drive on the wrong, anti-freedom side of the road) doesn't mean it can work in the USA

 :facepalm:

realtalk you gotta be fucking retarded to produce this sentence and this is a great example why Millennials who are convinced they know more about the way the world should work than others should never, ever be listened to
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: As a white male I on October 13, 2014, 05:40:52 AM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21329_5-tiny-common-sense-changes-that-would-save-world.html

 :lolno:

Yep, that's it. We've reached peak Gen crY. Pack it up boys, there's nothing left to see here.

Right? Please?  :myecred:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: New Feminist Jihad on October 13, 2014, 08:16:53 AM
Lol, Germany drives on the same side as the U.S. so way to stick in some untrue bs to make fun of "LOL FREEDOM AMERICA HAHA"
good job cracked
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on October 13, 2014, 10:16:37 AM
http://www.cracked.com/article_19831_5-horrifying-things-postal-workers-know-about-mail.html

Newman on Seinfeld was not an exaggeration apparently. Seriously lol at any government worker that thinks anyone should give them a tip for anything.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on October 13, 2014, 11:43:00 AM
Lol, Germany drives on the same side as the U.S. so way to stick in some untrue bs to make fun of "LOL FREEDOM AMERICA HAHA"
good job cracked

Most of the world drives on the same side as the USA, which makes it even dumber.

(http://i.imgur.com/HdsQIRW.png)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on October 13, 2014, 11:56:15 AM
http://www.cracked.com/article_19831_5-horrifying-things-postal-workers-know-about-mail.html

Newman on Seinfeld was not an exaggeration apparently. Seriously lol at any government worker that thinks anyone should give them a tip for anything.

I had a mailman I would have left a christmas tip to. Because he climbed my icy death stairs every winter, knew where my hole in the wall was, and would try to get my neighbor or landlady to let him into the hall to leave packages.

i never did because the the other 50% of the time the mailman was some worthless fucking maillady who couldn't deliver a letter on time to save her life. Guaranteed 1 day delay on anything she touched. And I never knew what their schedule was.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on October 13, 2014, 12:03:13 PM
http://www.cracked.com/article_19831_5-horrifying-things-postal-workers-know-about-mail.html

Newman on Seinfeld was not an exaggeration apparently. Seriously lol at any government worker that thinks anyone should give them a tip for anything.

I had a mailmail I would have left a christmas tip to. Because he climbed my icy death stairs every winter, knew where my hole in the wall was, and would try to get my neighbor or landlady to let him into the hall to leave packages.

i never did because the the other 50% of the time the mailman was some worthless fucking maillady who couldn't deliver a letter on time to safe her life. Gaurranteed 1 day delay on anything she touched. And I never knew what their schedule was.

That's a good fucking point honestly, our dude breaks out the chain when shit ices over and has brought me packages when I personally couldn't remove my car from my parking spot. I might give out some weather related, how in the fuck did you get your truck up that icy hill, related tips this winter.


Lol, Germany drives on the same side as the U.S. so way to stick in some untrue bs to make fun of "LOL FREEDOM AMERICA HAHA"
good job cracked

Most of the world drives on the same side as the USA, which makes it even dumber.

(http://i.imgur.com/HdsQIRW.png)

Stupid fucking americans, north americans, central americans, much of carribeaners, most of south americans, green and icelanders, vast majority of europeans, russians, most of asians, middle easterners, most of africans driving on the right side of the road.
-Greg Cugino or whatever dudes bloody lol name is

Might as well say earthlings drive on the right side of the road honestly
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on October 18, 2014, 11:38:55 AM
Some unfunny broad on cracked actually made her own "facebook fan page". See, she has so many fans that it necessitated the creation of a fan page.

https://www.facebook.com/ChristinaHWombat

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXuCgD4cbHs
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on October 18, 2014, 03:28:03 PM
I had a mailman I would have left a christmas tip to. Because he climbed my icy death stairs every winter, knew where my hole in the wall was, and would try to get my neighbor or landlady to let him into the hall to leave packages.

Jesus, why on Earth would you leave him a tip for that?! I don't care if he's bisexual, it's still really poor form for a gigolo to make a pass at neighboring ladies right after he's done servicing his john's gloryhole. Irresponsible too, since he could infect them with the "icy death" he just caught from his john's passageway.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on October 18, 2014, 05:08:35 PM
I had a mailman I would have left a christmas tip to. Because he climbed my icy death stairs every winter, knew where my hole in the wall was, and would try to get my neighbor or landlady to let him into the hall to leave packages.

Jesus, why on Earth would you leave him a tip for that?! I don't care if he's bisexual, it's still really poor form for a gigolo to make a pass at neighboring ladies right after he's done servicing his john's gloryhole. Irresponsible too, since he could infect them with the "icy death" he just caught from his john's passageway.

:clappo:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on October 18, 2014, 05:26:42 PM
I had a mailman I would have left a christmas tip to. Because he climbed my icy death stairs every winter, knew where my hole in the wall was, and would try to get my neighbor or landlady to let him into the hall to leave packages.

Jesus, why on Earth would you leave him a tip for that?! I don't care if he's bisexual, it's still really poor form for a gigolo to make a pass at neighboring ladies right after he's done servicing his john's gloryhole. Irresponsible too, since he could infect them with the "icy death" he just caught from his john's passageway.

Jesus you're clingy. I told you it was over. No need to start sniping about the mailman, that had nothing to do with what happened between us.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on October 19, 2014, 02:05:48 AM
i thought tipping the mailman and the newspaper guy at Christmas was normal


not now that it's a different negress every three months though, no
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: bigperm on October 19, 2014, 05:41:58 PM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21329_5-tiny-common-sense-changes-that-would-save-world.html

 :lolno:

The cameras for police is actually a pretty good idea. It would make incidents like what happened with that poor boy in Ferguson a lot more cut and dry.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on October 20, 2014, 12:04:20 PM
Yeah these aren't really terrible ideas.

"Stopped clock" and all that.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on October 20, 2014, 01:43:18 PM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21329_5-tiny-common-sense-changes-that-would-save-world.html

 :lolno:

The cameras for police is actually a pretty good idea. It would make incidents like what happened with that poor boy in Ferguson a lot more cut and dry.

To be honest, I think that cameras in badges would put cops at a huge disadvantage, because sometimes they legit need to break the rules a little to keep the public safe. Now I'm not saying there aren't shitty, corrupt cops out there, but there are also a lot of criminals who I guarantee you will take advantage and manage to get away with more shit if they know big brother is watching johnny law at all times. Traffic cops with cameras? I could see that. Criminal investigators and cops at the scene of a shootout and shit like that? No way. We have to trust the police to police themselves to some degree, and we do have mechanisms in our society to try and enforce that. Now, I'm not saying those mechanisms don't need tweaking, but I don't think putting cameras on all cops at all times is the answer. The vast majority of cops are very good people.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on October 20, 2014, 02:50:43 PM
Cameras on police have been tried before and the results have been overwhelmingly positive. Why wouldn't you want to have easy proof every-time of your own lawful actions? Anyone trying to make a false report of police brutality will have to consider the higher chance people are going to see their shit and next time a Judge Dredd wannabe decides to beat some kid up for having $50 of weed on him will think twice to. We all win here.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on October 20, 2014, 03:22:52 PM
I dunno, I can just imagine some legit dangerous criminals getting off on technicalities if every single thing the cops do is videotaped. I could be totally out to lunch in saying that, but you see guys who have done stuff like drown their own kids getting off on technicalities(This actually happened this year*) now because officers didn't follow "procedure X" properly. I just imagine that kind of thing getting worse if the entire investigation is taped start to finish, and the defense can use the video evidence in court to get a murderer or rapist off because an officer used an improper choke-hold to bring him to the ground or some shit. I think a better solution is to encourage more use of non-lethal force such as tasers and pepper-spray when the situation permits. We may have to agree to disagree on this instead of escalating into a pointless Something Awfulisque slap fight over personal politics.

*No joke, they said he was poor and uneducated, and therefore it was not fair for officers to outsmart him to get a confession the way they did. Check it out: http://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/mr-big-ruling-a-game-changer-for-those-convicted-in-sting-operations-1.2724310
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on October 20, 2014, 05:11:10 PM
I think cameras on cops is a good idea, but I'd be totally down for more nonlethal takedown methods being employed first.

The problem with the Michael Brown shit isn't that Wilson is some racist shitlord out to murder niggers. It's the whole use of force guidelines. From everything I've heard here and other places from gun owners and LEO folks, the decision tree is this:

1. You don't draw your gun unless you intend to shoot
2. You don't shoot unless you shoot intending to kill (no "wounding" shots to the legs or whatever like on tv)
3. There are many things that constitute a threat to the officer which call for lethal force besides just going up against a guy with a gun

Based on that, Wilson did nothing wrong. Putting him on trial is useless, because it is indeed The System liberal true believers, and railroading a guy who only followed his training and the rules of engagement he was given is only going to take him out, but not the thousands of other cops still following those rules.

Did Michael Brown deserve to die for rushing a cop while unarmed after committing robbery? Only in they eyes of Judge Dredd or some real hardcore racists who only wish they could throw him over a tree branch themselves because niggers. So right now we do have some innocent people getting hurt or killed, or not so innocents getting death for a crime that doesn't warrant it. So using more nonlethal force would stop that.

The counterpoint is that could cause more cops to be hurt or killed, so it's a bit of a trade-off. Though I wouldn't at all argue to eliminate cops having guns like in the UK, more just to add more non-lethal options to their arsenal and/or encourage them to use the ones they have more often when situations require it.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: sub-base turf sniffing boner diarist on October 20, 2014, 05:39:38 PM
I can think of a perfect weapon to arm police with for dealing with uppity aspiring rappers:
(https://i.imgur.com/G5Rxo6z.jpg)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on October 20, 2014, 06:18:12 PM
uppity aspiring rapper

new username.txt
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Carbpoole on October 20, 2014, 06:26:21 PM
I think cameras on cops is a good idea, but I'd be totally down for more nonlethal takedown methods being employed first.

The problem with the Michael Brown shit isn't that Wilson is some racist shitlord out to murder niggers. It's the whole use of force guidelines. From everything I've heard here and other places from gun owners and LEO folks, the decision tree is this:

1. You don't draw your gun unless you intend to shoot
2. You don't shoot unless you shoot intending to kill (no "wounding" shots to the legs or whatever like on tv)
3. There are many things that constitute a threat to the officer which call for lethal force besides just going up against a guy with a gun

Based on that, Wilson did nothing wrong. Putting him on trial is useless, because it is indeed The System liberal true believers, and railroading a guy who only followed his training and the rules of engagement he was given is only going to take him out, but not the thousands of other cops still following those rules.

Did Michael Brown deserve to die for rushing a cop while unarmed after committing robbery? Only in they eyes of Judge Dredd or some real hardcore racists who only wish they could throw him over a tree branch themselves because niggers. So right now we do have some innocent people getting hurt or killed, or not so innocents getting death for a crime that doesn't warrant it. So using more nonlethal force would stop that.

The counterpoint is that could cause more cops to be hurt or killed, so it's a bit of a trade-off. Though I wouldn't at all argue to eliminate cops having guns like in the UK, more just to add more non-lethal options to their arsenal and/or encourage them to use the ones they have more often when situations require it.

If I had to choose between the law according to Dredd or the law being enforced by the whimsical lynchings of the liberal left, I'd go Dredd every time.

And tasers won't work where it's cold because of the clothing. The best non-lethal option available would be not trying to fight the cops, trying to find solutions to balance the fight and make the fight more fair is insanity.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on October 20, 2014, 06:51:09 PM
Rubber bullets, Northern Ireland style, could be a decent middle ground between tasers and guns, I suppose. Though I also wouldn't want the police to have to rely exclusively on them.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on October 20, 2014, 07:30:18 PM
hold on mr brown, plz stop trying to grab my gun for a moment while i attempt to use a non-lethal means of subduing you first

ok, it seems the pepper spray didnt work, hold on a moment while i draw and fire my taser.

ok, i know you are very impatient mr brown, but as all other means have failed i will now remove my firearm from its holster and shoot you, plz do not attempt to shoot me with my own firearm while i do this
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Professor of Niggerology on October 20, 2014, 08:27:23 PM
I think cameras on cops is a good idea, but I'd be totally down for more nonlethal takedown methods being employed first.

The problem with the Michael Brown shit isn't that Wilson is some racist shitlord out to murder niggers. It's the whole use of force guidelines. From everything I've heard here and other places from gun owners and LEO folks, the decision tree is this:

1. You don't draw your gun unless you intend to shoot
2. You don't shoot unless you shoot intending to kill (no "wounding" shots to the legs or whatever like on tv)
3. There are many things that constitute a threat to the officer which call for lethal force besides just going up against a guy with a gun

Based on that, Wilson did nothing wrong. Putting him on trial is useless, because it is indeed The System liberal true believers, and railroading a guy who only followed his training and the rules of engagement he was given is only going to take him out, but not the thousands of other cops still following those rules.

Did Michael Brown deserve to die for rushing a cop while unarmed after committing robbery? Only in they eyes of Judge Dredd or some real hardcore racists who only wish they could throw him over a tree branch themselves because niggers. So right now we do have some innocent people getting hurt or killed, or not so innocents getting death for a crime that doesn't warrant it. So using more nonlethal force would stop that.

The counterpoint is that could cause more cops to be hurt or killed, so it's a bit of a trade-off. Though I wouldn't at all argue to eliminate cops having guns like in the UK, more just to add more non-lethal options to their arsenal and/or encourage them to use the ones they have more often when situations require it.
If you were Officer Wilson and some huge linebacker nigger tried to grab your gun would you not fear for your life? Lethal force was justified
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Monostats Infected Scrotum on October 20, 2014, 08:53:58 PM
Said it before, will say again: I agree with the forensic evidence, and it says Wilson removed a threat to his life who also happened to have been a petty criminal beforehand.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on October 20, 2014, 10:25:49 PM
hold on mr brown, plz stop trying to grab my gun for a moment while i attempt to use a non-lethal means of subduing you first

ok, it seems the pepper spray didnt work, hold on a moment while i draw and fire my taser.

ok, i know you are very impatient mr brown, but as all other means have failed i will now remove my firearm from its holster and shoot you, plz do not attempt to shoot me with my own firearm while i do this

Our police should be more like Australian cops. :unparsons:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-0Ds05UnrA

"Mr. Brown, would you please accompany me to the police station?"
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on October 20, 2014, 11:09:59 PM
Said it before, will say again: I agree with the forensic evidence, and it says Wilson removed a threat to his life who also happened to have been a petty criminal beforehand.

Well like I said, if you believe any criminal activity deserves death, then there's no issue with criminals getting killed by police no matter how small the crime. Not everyone feels that way. Some people don't even believe that the crime of threatening a cop or making him feel uncomfortable deserves death. Liberal of me, I know.

I'm not saying that cops should never use lethal force, just maybe the guidelines should be reviewed and maybe we can use technology to continue to come up with new, nonlethal ways to stop people. We didn't have tasers and rubber bullets 100 years ago so it stands to reason there may be further things we can invent to lessen the need for deadly force.

Let me also reiterate: I totally agree that Wilson did exactly what he was trained to do, should have done under current guidelines, and was completely within the bounds of the law to do. I'm not saying he was wrong. I'm saying maybe the guidelines should be looked at.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Smello on October 20, 2014, 11:51:30 PM
lol if you're stupid enough to charge a cop and try to take his gun you deserve to die.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on October 21, 2014, 12:26:33 AM
Well like I said, if you believe any criminal activity deserves death, then there's no issue with criminals getting killed by police no matter how small the crime. Not everyone feels that way. Some people don't even believe that the crime of threatening a cop or making him feel uncomfortable deserves death. Liberal of me, I know.

im not sure what case you're reading about, because this guy assaulted a police officer and attempted to take his gun

im pretty sure for as long as cops will be allowed to carry guns (lol britain), attempting to take a cop's gun has been and will always be a situation in which the cop will attempt to shoot you
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on October 21, 2014, 12:53:01 AM
I hate that "well it doesnt deserve the death penalty!!!" line. Its so dishonest.

Actions have risks. If you create a violent situation (like attacking a police officer or mugging someone) theres a risk that it might end up very badly for the aggressor. thats not a "death penalty", its more like a hazard of the job. 
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on October 21, 2014, 01:17:22 AM
I guess it's me not aspiring to rap, but I figure I if attacked a cop, being tased or severely beaten would be a best case scenario.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on October 21, 2014, 02:56:23 AM
hold on mr brown, plz stop trying to grab my gun for a moment while i attempt to use a non-lethal means of subduing you first

ok, it seems the pepper spray didnt work, hold on a moment while i draw and fire my taser.

ok, i know you are very impatient mr brown, but as all other means have failed i will now remove my firearm from its holster and shoot you, plz do not attempt to shoot me with my own firearm while i do this

Our police should be more like Australian cops. :unparsons:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-0Ds05UnrA

"Mr. Brown, would you please accompany me to the police station?"

if our criminals were more like that guy then absolutely

unfortunately it's more like this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WfFd4mlf5RQ
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on October 21, 2014, 04:43:40 AM
Rubber bullets, Northern Ireland style, could be a decent middle ground between tasers and guns, I suppose. Though I also wouldn't want the police to have to rely exclusively on them.

rubber bullets are extremely dangerous, particularly at close range where a large number of self defense shootings take place. rubber bullets in riot control are designed to be fired from a distance to let them slow down before they hit someone. they also only inflict pain, which a motivated nigger can work through. alternatively a shot that does more than just inflict pain (ie to wind them) has just as good a chance as killing them anyway

non-lethal weapons are simply not effective most of the time. with the exception of the taser, non lethal weapons like pepper spray or rubber bullets are designed to irritate or inflict temporary pain. tasers are slightly better in that they induce involuntary muscle convulsions - but only if they get a good shot and they really arent that reliable.

its one thing for a woman to put mace in their purse and spray a nigger to buy enough time to run away, its another thing for a cop to use it to put a nigger down.

this is all irrelevant because no police department encourages their cops to go out of their way to shoot niggers and deadly force is always the last resort for when the cop is in fear of their life or the lives of other people. funnily enough its somehow as if assaulting a police officer and attempting to take his firearm makes people think you're dangerous or something

Quote from: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0
1. You don't draw your gun unless you intend to shoot
2. You don't shoot unless you shoot intending to kill (no "wounding" shots to the legs or whatever like on tv)
1. some people misrepresent this, but it should be "you do not draw your gun unless you are prepared to shoot". ie if you draw your gun, and the other guy backs down then the situation has de-escalated and you dont need to pull the trigger.
2. im not sure how serious, but if you believe for one single second that shooting to wound is a viable option at all there is no hope for you.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on October 21, 2014, 07:22:48 AM
Because I've heard people say shooting to wound isn't the way it's done over and over, including n this very board?

Or are you in fact saying that cops can and should try to not aim for center mass but try and wing guys like Mike Brown in the legs to non-lethally take them down?

Same goes for "don't draw your gun unless you intend to shoot." maybe that's more for your average Joe carrying in public and not cops, but I know if you draw your gun and don't shoot in some places that's brandishing and it's illegal.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on October 21, 2014, 09:11:31 AM
If I was going to shoot someone in a justifiable way I would absolutely want a recording of it. As far as I'm concerned anything that makes public servants more accountable is good in my book.

There are certainly some downsides though and its not like I've put a huge amount of research into this so I'm definitely open to alternative points of view.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Martin Looter King on October 21, 2014, 10:48:21 AM
Brandishing your weapon is considered assault.

Weapons training is all about what to do with your firearm after you have drawn it.  It is almost a point of no return.  Once the gun is out, training kicks in because in a situation where you need a gun every second counts.  Once you have made the decision that your life is in danger, gun time.

The reason you aim for center mass is because you are responsible for the bullets;  you want them to go into the threat and not into some bystander. Also go look in the mirror and compare the size of your chest with the size of your bird arms/legs.  Unless you are Jesus from Person of Interest you aren't going to snapshot wound people. 
 
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on October 21, 2014, 07:33:29 PM
Brandishing your weapon is considered assault.

Weapons training is all about what to do with your firearm after you have drawn it.  It is almost a point of no return.  Once the gun is out, training kicks in because in a situation where you need a gun every second counts.  Once you have made the decision that your life is in danger, gun time.

this is true, but it varies considerably by situation, if you draw you should definitely have your finger on the trigger ready to go, but if the situation changes (ie the other guy backs down or runs away), there is no need to pull the trigger. you'll definitely get into more trouble for shooting st trayvon in the back vs pulling out your gun and st trayvon running away.

you definitely need to be in fear of your life to draw in the first place though. for cops its that + fear for public safety i believe.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on October 22, 2014, 07:01:24 AM
I can shoot someone to protect someone else even if I'm safe. Cops have slightly more leeway in that letting a guy run away who just tried to seriously injure or kill either them or another they can shoot to stop them from hurting others.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on October 22, 2014, 07:05:33 AM
A lot of those rules are highly dependent on the stituation. Is it two people shoving and throwing half hearted punches? Or is one one them slamming the other's head into the pavement again and again. Also this is sort of sad but the color of the people involved also matters alot.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: weirddogtreats on October 22, 2014, 07:33:51 AM
*No joke, they said he was poor and uneducated, and therefore it was not fair for officers to outsmart him to get a confession the way they did. Check it out: http://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/mr-big-ruling-a-game-changer-for-those-convicted-in-sting-operations-1.2724310

This Mr. Big shit isn't really "outsmarting" the suspect.  The cops go undercover as criminals and gain the person's trust, then demand he confess to a previous crime so they can gain his trust.  The reason courts are not accepting these "confessions" aren't because the cops pull one over on the suspect. The suspect has every reason in the world to "confess" to the crime they were publicly accused of even if they didn't do it, because it's way more believable to say "yo remember that crime I was charged with but was acquitted?  Yeah I actually did that," than it is to just make something up.

As it stands now courts accept the confessions garnered in this way when the suspect provides specific details that they can verify with other evidence, which is pretty much how normal confessions too.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on October 22, 2014, 11:45:06 AM
Back to our regularly scheduled programming... (http://www.donotlink.com/c6ip)

 :stewart: Got some impressive clickbait feminism comparing women to children.

Quote
Why this double standard? We hope you won't call us misogynists when we say that Mother Nature is a bit of a bitch when it comes to women. Humans in general tend to be pretty equal in lower-body strength, but when it comes to the upper body, men are on average about twice as strong as women. And since most hitting is done with the upper body rather than with a series of acrobatic kicks, this gives men an advantage that just isn't sportsmanlike. It's similar to why it's socially unacceptable to punch children in the face.


Got some oh so clever jabs at MRA's, that scourge of fringe internet boards everywhere.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Salacious B. Crumb on October 22, 2014, 01:39:04 PM
I like how they didn't even sign their name to it. It's just Cracked Staff, but you can probably guess the faggots that jerked one another off onto the page.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on October 22, 2014, 07:11:06 PM
Back to our regularly scheduled programming... (http://www.donotlink.com/c6ip)

 :stewart: Got some impressive clickbait feminism comparing women to children.

Quote
Why this double standard? We hope you won't call us misogynists when we say that Mother Nature is a bit of a bitch when it comes to women. Humans in general tend to be pretty equal in lower-body strength, but when it comes to the upper body, men are on average about twice as strong as women. And since most hitting is done with the upper body rather than with a series of acrobatic kicks, this gives men an advantage that just isn't sportsmanlike. It's similar to why it's socially unacceptable to punch children in the face.


Got some oh so clever jabs at MRA's, that scourge of fringe internet boards everywhere.

BIOTRUTHS
:aspero:

Also lol at what the link anonymizer does to Cracked:
http://www.donotlink.com/dnl/faq

Quote
Linking to dubious websites

You've all heard there's no such thing as bad publicity. On the internet this is doubly true. When you link to a website — regardless of the reason — this strengthens its position in search engines. This means that a bad review of a website makes it more popular.

When you are discussing or alerting others to a website that promotes a fraud, scam, cult or other questionable business and you link to that site, search engines will (after a while) improve the offending site's rank.
Therefore, more people will find these shady websites, and will be exposed to their content without getting the proper context.
That's where donotlink comes in.

With donotlink.com, you can link to sites without giving them "Google juice".

:tom:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on October 22, 2014, 08:04:59 PM
How did we miss this gem? (http://www.donotlink.com/c6vn) Piss bottling and binging on energy drinks ITT.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on October 28, 2014, 08:42:19 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-reasons-ebola-panic-secretly-racist/

If you are scared of Ebola, it is because you are racist.

SJWs have to get over this stuff. Africa is a place where there is no quality medical care, women get raped all the time, children routinely get enslaved, brainwashed and given AK47s, every second country is torn apart by civil war. It is a shithole. Notice I didn't say anything about black people in that statement. That's because I am not calling Africa a shithole because there are black people there, I am calling Africa a shithole because it fucking sucks. Like seriously, there are countries in Africa where 15% of the fucking population has HIV. If you call a place largely populated by black people a shithole because it is a shithole, you are not some magical closet raciest that hates black people. I think Russia is a shithole too, and everyone there is white. Some places in the world are just bad places to live.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Monostats Infected Scrotum on October 28, 2014, 08:54:17 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-reasons-ebola-panic-secretly-racist/

If you are scared of Ebola, it is because you are racist.

SJWs have to get over this stuff. Africa is a place where there is no quality medical care, women get raped all the time, children routinely get enslaved, brainwashed and given AK47s, every second country is torn apart by civil war. It is a shithole. Notice I didn't say anything about black people in that statement. That's because I am not calling Africa a shithole because there are black people there, I am calling Africa a shithole because it fucking sucks. Like seriously, there are countries in Africa where 15% of the fucking population has HIV. If you call a place largely populated by black people a shithole because it is a shithole, you are not some magical closet raciest that hates black people. I think Russia is a shithole too, and everyone there is white. Some places in the world are just bad places to live.

 :reagan: Yeah, SJWs are choosing a really stupid hill to die on concerning a place that has been a shithole regardless who has been in charge for millennia.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on October 28, 2014, 09:01:59 AM
like 90% of the women are missing their clits too
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on October 28, 2014, 10:53:59 AM
Selective woman's rights movement. So I guess they only care about white women, bigots
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on October 28, 2014, 12:53:28 PM
So racist just means anything you disagree with now huh cracked?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on October 28, 2014, 12:56:36 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-reasons-ebola-panic-secretly-racist/

If you are scared of Ebola, it is because you are racist.

SJWs have to get over this stuff. Africa is a place where there is no quality medical care, women get raped all the time, children routinely get enslaved, brainwashed and given AK47s, every second country is torn apart by civil war. It is a shithole. Notice I didn't say anything about black people in that statement. That's because I am not calling Africa a shithole because there are black people there, I am calling Africa a shithole because it fucking sucks. Like seriously, there are countries in Africa where 15% of the fucking population has HIV. If you call a place largely populated by black people a shithole because it is a shithole, you are not some magical closet raciest that hates black people. I think Russia is a shithole too, and everyone there is white. Some places in the world are just bad places to live.

imo the difference in shitholeitude between Africa and Russia is like the difference between shooting a bullet and tossing it underhand.
Title: Re: nerds vs niggers
Post by: SSOUL TRANN on October 28, 2014, 01:06:33 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-reasons-ebola-panic-secretly-racist/

If you are scared of Ebola, it is because you are racist.

SJWs have to get over this stuff. Africa is a place where there is no quality medical care, women get raped all the time, children routinely get enslaved, brainwashed and given AK47s, every second country is torn apart by civil war. It is a shithole. Notice I didn't say anything about black people in that statement. That's because I am not calling Africa a shithole because there are black people there, I am calling Africa a shithole because it fucking sucks. Like seriously, there are countries in Africa where 15% of the fucking population has HIV. If you call a place largely populated by black people a shithole because it is a shithole, you are not some magical closet raciest that hates black people. I think Russia is a shithole too, and everyone there is white. Some places in the world are just bad places to live.

imo the difference in shitholeitude between Africa and Russia is like the difference between shooting a bullet and tossing it underhand.
Russia is the underhand in your analogy?

If there is anyone here that would rather live in sub Saharan Africa than Russia I'd love to hear why.

Pro Russia:
Beautiful Women (until they get old)
Less Disease and proper quarantine
Something like Healthcare
Civilization, mostly
Putin
Lack of lions dragging you out of your mudhut in the middle of the night

Pro Africa:
Warmer
Scenic in some places
Exotic animals (to eat you)
Small possibility to become a warlord and make millions
Ability to rape young virgins to cure aids
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on October 28, 2014, 01:15:33 PM
Yes, Russia is underhand, as in the thing I'd prefer to have hit me.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Got Soylent? on October 28, 2014, 01:44:59 PM
Yeah yeah, it was just an example of a place without black people where I wouldn't want to live to argue against the, "You just don't want to live there because *racism*" thing that SJWs throw out there. Truth be told, most places in the world seems pretty shitty, and I don't think I'd really want to live anywhere other than the US or Canada. It has nothing to do with racism. I like living somewhere where I can own several acres of land and also not get shot.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on October 28, 2014, 03:23:55 PM
It actually really shocked me when I looked up how terrible Russian really is, like I'd always assumed it was kind of drab and dull but at least kind of put together, right? Going by the male life expectancy, Russia gets beaten by such stellar champs as Cambodia, Ghana, Botswana, India and Yemen.



Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on October 28, 2014, 05:20:48 PM
It actually really shocked me when I looked up how terrible Russian really is, like I'd always assumed it was kind of drab and dull but at least kind of put together, right? Going by the male life expectancy, Russia gets beaten by such stellar champs as Cambodia, Ghana, Botswana, India and Yemen.

TBF that is because they drink vodka like it is water. Since the regular water is undrinkable thanks to communism.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on October 28, 2014, 05:31:11 PM
My anecdotal experience with Russians (outside of Russia) tells me that how much potable water is available does not seem to decrease their daily alcohol consumption.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on October 28, 2014, 05:50:23 PM
My anecdotal experience with Russians (outside of Russia) tells me that how much potable water is available does not seem to decrease their daily alcohol consumption.

i'm pretty sure when a Mexican sneaks into the US, they still default to bottled water because they were raised in a place where you get the unending shits if you drink from the wrong tap.

When you grow up drinking Vodka, you aren't going to stop just because there is a bucket of free Dasani.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: wimpb on October 28, 2014, 07:52:12 PM
~russia facts~

10 years ago, russia had more than twice as many abortions as live births and they still have more abortions than live births today despite a population decline that makes japan blush

~russia facts~
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on October 29, 2014, 12:14:25 AM
~russia facts~

10 years ago, russia had more than twice as many abortions as live births and they still have more abortions than live births today despite a population decline that makes japan blush

~russia facts~

You should just drop ~russia facts~ into random ss threads b/c they really makes you think
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0 on October 29, 2014, 12:41:36 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-reasons-ebola-panic-secretly-racist/

If you are scared of Ebola, it is because you are racist.

SJWs have to get over this stuff. Africa is a place where there is no quality medical care, women get raped all the time, children routinely get enslaved, brainwashed and given AK47s, every second country is torn apart by civil war. It is a shithole. Notice I didn't say anything about black people in that statement. That's because I am not calling Africa a shithole because there are black people there, I am calling Africa a shithole because it fucking sucks. Like seriously, there are countries in Africa where 15% of the fucking population has HIV. If you call a place largely populated by black people a shithole because it is a shithole, you are not some magical closet raciest that hates black people. I think Russia is a shithole too, and everyone there is white. Some places in the world are just bad places to live.

imo the difference in shitholeitude between Africa and Russia is like the difference between shooting a bullet and tossing it underhand.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-K5RlyKcfo
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on October 29, 2014, 06:02:33 AM
Yeah yeah, it was just an example of a place without black people where I wouldn't want to live to argue against the, "You just don't want to live there because *racism*" thing that SJWs throw out there. Truth be told, most places in the world seems pretty shitty, and I don't think I'd really want to live anywhere other than the US or Canada. It has nothing to do with racism. I like living somewhere where I can own several acres of land and also not get shot.

You want white shitholes, try Albania. Or Kosovo.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on October 29, 2014, 02:28:59 PM
Yeah yeah, it was just an example of a place without black people where I wouldn't want to live to argue against the, "You just don't want to live there because *racism*" thing that SJWs throw out there. Truth be told, most places in the world seems pretty shitty, and I don't think I'd really want to live anywhere other than the US or Canada. It has nothing to do with racism. I like living somewhere where I can own several acres of land and also not get shot.

You want white shitholes, try Albania. Or Kosovo.

Muslims.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on October 30, 2014, 12:15:35 AM
nah, if you want a nice vacation go to the coast in Albania, everyone is Christian and they drink like fish. Nice beaches, good seafood, absolutely cheap as shit too. Orders of magnitude cheaper than Greece and cheaper than Croatia has gotten. Drive down through Montenegro.


not that anyone you will see there is white, but Africa begins at the Pyrenees anyways
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: As a white male I on October 30, 2014, 05:48:27 AM
nah, if you want a nice vacation go to the coast in Albania, everyone is Christian and they drink like fish. Nice beaches, good seafood, absolutely cheap as shit too. Orders of magnitude cheaper than Greece and cheaper than Croatia has gotten. Drive down through Montenegro.


not that anyone you will see there is white, but Africa begins at the Pyrenees anyways

I've been wanting to go to Serbia and Croatia on vacation for a while now. I've been in most mediterranean countries and Bulgaria, but the Balkans are still on my to do-list.

Also a friend of mine who spent time in Croatia said it has pretty much the hottest women in the world.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: pavlovian hard-on on October 30, 2014, 09:44:41 AM
nah, if you want a nice vacation go to the coast in Albania, everyone is Christian and they drink like fish. Nice beaches, good seafood, absolutely cheap as shit too. Orders of magnitude cheaper than Greece and cheaper than Croatia has gotten. Drive down through Montenegro.


not that anyone you will see there is white, but Africa begins at the Pyrenees anyways

I can attest to this 100%  :reagan:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on October 30, 2014, 10:56:51 PM
Also a friend of mine who spent time in Croatia said it has pretty much the hottest women in the world.


Absolutely true and they're almost universally in fantastic shape. I thought Bulgaria wasn't bad either.

It really makes history come together. I understand now why the Romans would rather hold onto a little bit of that than all of Northern Europe
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on November 02, 2014, 01:04:26 AM
Well, I guess this was bound to happen someday.

http://www.cracked.com/article_21858_what-its-like-to-survive-point-blank-blast-from-shotgun.html
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SSOUL TRANN on November 02, 2014, 01:25:44 AM
Well, I guess this was bound to happen someday.

http://www.cracked.com/article_21858_what-its-like-to-survive-point-blank-blast-from-shotgun.html
Lol I forgot all about that moron Ryan Jarcy

I'm sure he'll use the $50 from cracked to buy some drugs
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: marlon perkins on November 02, 2014, 01:41:03 AM
I think someone in the comments found us; "I googled this guy's name and found a discussion about how he blew it off while he was high, and he was trying to defraud his insurance".

This of course triggered librage, and massive downvotes.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on November 08, 2014, 01:38:53 PM
http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty_1158_19-surprisingly-sexist-messages-in-modern-pop-culture/

This is pretty much more pozzed than an HIV jizzblood smoothie
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on November 08, 2014, 02:44:37 PM
They have another terrible article about how not to be a bad person which I won't bother linking here because they don't need the clicks.

Typical feel good preaching to the choir bullshit. I'm sure a random dude hanging out in the street at 10:30AM on a weekday harassing random people who walk by really gives a shit what a bunch of lily white trust fund bloggers think about their behavior.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Americas Most Trusted News Source on November 08, 2014, 04:10:54 PM
The only good part about Captain Goonhab's story is that he has 60 grand in medical bills that he can't get disability, food stamps, or Medicaid to help with which means his attempt to commit insurance fraud/sue his doctor for not giving him unlimited oxycontin or whatever was ultimately fruitless.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on November 08, 2014, 11:42:15 PM
http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty_1158_19-surprisingly-sexist-messages-in-modern-pop-culture/

This is pretty much more pozzed than an HIV jizzblood smoothie


It's so fucking disingenuous because they're stretching the definition of "modern pop culture" to absurd levels

this TV commercial, among the most ephemeral of all media types, is blatantly sexist and clearly a reflection of major social trends

...this Samsung commercial which was written, filmed, and archived by Asians for internal industry use at trade expos and no average person would have seen had it not been leaked to reddit and the ensuing shitstorm etc. etc. etc. is clearly a reflection of major social trends in the West
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: freak puke on November 09, 2014, 04:36:58 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/UuH0EJn.png)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Scourge Of Kansai on November 09, 2014, 04:52:57 PM
I'm not really sure what they're trying to claim there. Twitter isn't a place to have debates, its people throwing fortune-cookie length snippets at each other. People on twitter tweet at people they disagree with, so what? What does that prove?


 :madgoon: Oh, they're women??? :madgoon:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on November 09, 2014, 08:17:46 PM
i don't think she looks better now but isn't running an entire article on your website splashing her picture up and saying her face is scary a fairly misogynistic thing to do


even though without opening the article I still know it's gonna be an 888 about body image issues, etc.

what a bunch of hopeless pozlords
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on November 11, 2014, 12:15:09 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/UuH0EJn.png)
the amazing thing about that study is that it actually proves the great majority of the posts made with the hash tag are neutral towards the 'victims'. but since the study was funded by SJWs they tried to paint it as PROOF GG IS A HATE GROUP!!!!!!!!!!! anyway.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: freak puke on November 12, 2014, 11:10:10 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/v1haqkd.jpg)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on November 16, 2014, 07:50:51 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/3-excuses-online-plagiarists-need-to-stop-making/

Gladstone should be pumped that anyone wanted to steal his jokes
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on November 16, 2014, 08:02:48 PM
Gotta have jokes first.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on November 24, 2014, 08:38:30 AM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21988_6-weird-ways-world-looks-different-when-youre-asexual.html

What on earth can SS make fun of without something awful???
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on November 24, 2014, 10:00:08 PM
That article has three authors and most of the upvoted comments are "me too" or "oh, this has a name? I totally have this"

Normally I would say it's cool that all of these pozzed-out weirdos are voluntarily removing themselves from the gene pool, but in the article they mention that asexuals "can enjoy sex" jesus christ
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on November 24, 2014, 10:02:52 PM
can't wait for tomorrow's 'six reasons why the michael brown injustice is X :christina:'
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Small Weinered Goon on November 24, 2014, 10:37:05 PM
Asexuals are like incels in that they probably wouldn't be asexual anymore if their internet connections just stopped working one day.  There is a good part of the population where their lives basically revolve around the internet.  I don't mean keeping up with IRL (lol) friends, I mean people whose every waking minute NEEDS to be in front of a screen of some kind.  With all that screen time, it's next to impossible to find someone, especially someone who will tolerate their broken, goony selves.  Since they're narcissists, they can't comprehend why they're not with anyone.  To cover their ass mentally, they just declare sex isn't for them.

It's a sad life to live but to be fair, most of them are going to blow their brains out in their 30s and 40s.  It'd suck to be 55 years old and never fuck someone, even if it is a 300 lb feminist-butterbeast.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on November 26, 2014, 02:31:42 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-movie-ratings-that-would-actually-be-helpful/

holy fuck I used to exaggerate about this site being all about getting mad at PROBLEMATIC things but now almost much every time I see Cracked tweet something it's some kind of :ultlibrage: article

e: wait holy fuck he actually complains about leftist messages in movies too

that was extremely unexpected given who this guy is

That article has three authors and most of the upvoted comments are "me too" or "oh, this has a name? I totally have this"

Normally I would say it's cool that all of these pozzed-out weirdos are voluntarily removing themselves from the gene pool, but in the article they mention that asexuals "can enjoy sex" jesus christ

I agree that theres probably a legit disorder out there which makes you unable to find anyone sexually attractive, and that must suck, but most people calling themselves asexual are probably 15 year old girls who want attention or virgins who are looking for an excuse.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Carbpoole on November 26, 2014, 07:07:25 AM
Enjoy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7iltTNzZQ0&list=UUwcxPTYqkg2JM3lFq6TifzA
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on November 26, 2014, 02:25:44 PM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-movie-ratings-that-would-actually-be-helpful/

holy fuck I used to exaggerate about this site being all about getting mad at PROBLEMATIC things but now almost much every time I see Cracked tweet something it's some kind of :ultlibrage: article

e: wait holy fuck he actually complains about leftist messages in movies too

that was extremely unexpected given who this guy is

I clicked a Cracked link because of this post basically for the first time since this thread got rolling, and

(http://i.imgur.com/KVkNOiq.png)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on November 26, 2014, 05:47:34 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/KVkNOiq.png)

Well its true. People of all ages pointed and laughed at him.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on November 26, 2014, 05:57:36 PM
Well its true. People of all ages pointed and laughed at him.

And Bugs was aping only the most cosmetic characteristics of a woman in order to fool men. Hmm, maybe the author is right.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Carbpoole on November 26, 2014, 06:10:02 PM
A while ago I was leafing through a book about the diversity of sexuality from the early seventies('68 represent!) and the description that seems to fit many goon-troons were called "exhibitionistic transvestism", something that accurately describes the guy that gets a boner about dressing up and trying to be perceived as a woman.

I'm sure it had a chapter about the so called "piss-fags" as well, they were the kind of people that hung out in male restrooms and would give you the equivalent of a buck if you stuck your cock in the pocket of their pants and pissed down their legs.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: GameDev Grade Dildo on November 27, 2014, 07:58:39 AM


I'm sure it had a chapter about the so called "piss-fags" as well, they were the kind of people that hung out in male restrooms and would give you the equivalent of a buck if you stuck your cock in the pocket of their pants and pissed down their legs.
goddamnit Sweden
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on November 27, 2014, 09:47:07 AM
I'm sure it had a chapter about the so called "piss-fags" as well, they were the kind of people that hung out in male restrooms and would give you the equivalent of a buck if you stuck your cock in the pocket of their pants and pissed down their legs.

Yes.. ok, but only if I can tell you that its raining.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SSOUL TRANN on November 27, 2014, 05:06:52 PM
Enjoy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7iltTNzZQ0&list=UUwcxPTYqkg2JM3lFq6TifzA
What in the actual fuck?  I watched that whole thing with my jaw dropped.  Who gives a shit that they're asexual?  Why the fuck are they having a meeting (with not one but two sign language interpreters) about how to spread awareness and understanding of asexuality?  Who cares?  Is it just attention whoredom?  Attempt to profit from YouTube views and selling books on a "controversial" topic?

I'm totally at a loss on this one.  It's not like there's some kind of -ism against asexual idiots.  Jesus Christ what a bunch of narcissistic retards.

Also, obligatory: would fuck the redhead and cure her asexuality.

Oh, and bowtie boy just needs to accept his gayness and move on with his life with another nice gay boy.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Triggered by Pepe on November 28, 2014, 06:08:09 AM
There's what, 10 people at that conference from what I saw? The hell did they rent a place that big for?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on November 28, 2014, 11:31:21 AM
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-things-no-one-tells-you-about-driving-through-desert/

Oh man holy shit you drove through the desert? Something millions of people do daily? Holy shit can't wait to hear all the amazing things you learned.

Potential ideas for next article:

4 things nobody tells you about washing the dishes
5 insane things I learned while walking my dog
3 completely bizarre things I experienced while vacuuming my living room
4 ways I almost died driving to the store for a dewski code red

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Tranny Feet on November 28, 2014, 02:20:34 PM
Asexuals are like incels in that they probably wouldn't be asexual anymore if their internet connections just stopped working one day.  There is a good part of the population where their lives basically revolve around the internet.  I don't mean keeping up with IRL (lol) friends, I mean people whose every waking minute NEEDS to be in front of a screen of some kind.  With all that screen time, it's next to impossible to find someone, especially someone who will tolerate their broken, goony selves.  Since they're narcissists, they can't comprehend why they're not with anyone.  To cover their ass mentally, they just declare sex isn't for them.

It's a sad life to live but to be fair, most of them are going to blow their brains out in their 30s and 40s.  It'd suck to be 55 years old and never fuck someone, even if it is a 300 lb feminist-butterbeast.

The asexual bullshit is the only way they can square the circle of their self-assured, cocksure internet personas and the real-life fact that they've never touched a tit. They develop a character and pride from the former but that pride collapses like dust when put against something as Real-Life common as a randy drunk chick; having to admit you don't know what you're doing (even to yourself), being maladroit and fumbling, being in your twenties but not being au fait with the physical mechanics of banging - all of this is extremely embarrassing and they know it but rather than face up to that, they write it off completely.

Excluding the ones who've been molested as kids or whatever or the chicks (who I'll give a pass) or religious crazies, every single incel dude conforms to the above - they're stuck in a feedback loop that sustains their social ineptitude but drives their narcissism.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: neat on November 28, 2014, 04:28:30 PM
Find me one asexual who:

1) is reasonably attractive
2) has no history of mental illness (depression, anxiety, homosexuality, etc)
3) has had a reasonably normal childhood (no sexual assaults, no incest etc)

And maybe I'll change my mind. Until then, asexuality is just incel dressed up in cultural Marxist jargon.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Gender Swapped Dinosaur on November 30, 2014, 05:33:14 AM

Asexuality just seems like a no-effort way for boring suburban white people to seem interesting and score oppression points.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on November 30, 2014, 10:29:18 AM
Seriously, don't even have to buy a wig or an ill fitting dress.

Just sit around doing what they were already doing (keeping genitals away from other genitals).
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 07, 2014, 12:14:02 AM
Quote
Ferguson, Eric Garner and Why Death Should Outrage Us

:ultlibrage:

Quote
Until this month, I had no idea that black moms teach their sons how to survive police encounters. It's called "The Talk," and black boys get it as soon as they start hitting puberty, because their moms realize that there's apparently nothing scarier to cops than a black teenager. I can barely manage reminders for my kids to wear their deodorant. The only good news in this crapstorm of awful is that history tells us that moments like these birth the changes that mean better futures.
:say:
(http://i.imgur.com/gnoPMyZ.jpg)

Quote
#4. Shut Up About Riots, White People
:say:
(http://i.imgur.com/gnoPMyZ.jpg)

and on and on and on

the ending is just the best though:

Quote
We've been mad about a lot of stuff this year. School shootings, sexual harassment, more sexual harassment, oh, and those kidnapped Nigerian school girls are still missing. It's been eight months, so I'm guessing that when we find them, they're going to have some newborn babies that need rescuing as well. That's assuming anyone is still looking.

See what I did there? I got mad all over again. That's a good thing. NOTHING CHANGES when people aren't mad. Two years ago, I was one of those foolheads who shared the Kony 2012 video, and I swear to God I'd do it again. I have zero ill will against a filmmaker who raised awareness about one of the world's biggest evils. Why are we still more mad at the guy who made that movie than we are at Joseph Kony? "Kony 2012" is a hilarious joke that people make when they want to bring up a dumb fad that we were all into for 24 hours. Not hilarious: child soldiers.

Oh crap, I digressed again. My point is that I suspect these constant spurts of outrage aren't for nothing. You're not a bad person for hashtagging a cause. In fact, I think we're going to look back on these heady days of hashtag activism as the Civil Rights Movement of the Twenty-Tweenies, assuming that's what we end up calling this decade. We're the new hippies, you guys. And like it or not, hippies changed the world by being loud and stupid-looking and unafraid of looking back on their passionate big talk with regret.

The scariest thing isn't looking back and getting embarrassed that you reblogged the Kony video, the scariest thing is looking back and realizing you never got angry at all.

yeah, getting mad on the internet is really a productive thing to do, and leads to a lot of change

SIGNAL BOOST THIS WITH PROPER OUTRAGE, PEOPLE :christina:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 07, 2014, 04:02:28 AM
I just copypasted that "OUR HASHTAGS WILL SAVE EVERYONE" paragraph to a black friend

He didn't feel very empowered :(

edit: actually he asked if it's satire lol
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Hogbox on December 07, 2014, 08:10:01 AM
The asexual bullshit is the only way they can square the circle of their self-assured, cocksure internet personas and the real-life fact that they've never touched a tit. They develop a character and pride from the former but that pride collapses like dust when put against something as Real-Life common as a randy drunk chick; having to admit you don't know what you're doing (even to yourself), being maladroit and fumbling, being in your twenties but not being au fait with the physical mechanics of banging - all of this is extremely embarrassing and they know it but rather than face up to that, they write it off completely.

Excluding the ones who've been molested as kids or whatever or the chicks (who I'll give a pass) or religious crazies, every single incel dude conforms to the above - they're stuck in a feedback loop that sustains their social ineptitude but drives their narcissism.

Fucking spot on, and can apply to a huge percentage of SJWs and self-negating millennials.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Danish Plastic Bigotry on December 07, 2014, 08:46:34 AM

Quote
I think we're going to look back on these heady days of hashtag activism as the Civil Rights Movement of the Twenty-Tweenies, assuming that's what we end up calling this decade. We're the new hippies, you guys. And like it or not, hippies changed the world by being loud and stupid-looking and unafraid of looking back on their passionate big talk with regret.

The scariest thing isn't looking back and getting embarrassed that you reblogged the Kony video, the scariest thing is looking back and realizing you never got angry at all.

hahaha "hashtag activism" will go up there with black grandmas getting pulled off the bus, college kids getting dogs sicced on them and MLK Jr. losing the top of his dome  :tuss:

at least this big-chinned ginger bitch realizes Generation Y social justice crusaders are just as loathsome and useless as hippies, who either abandoned their ideals and actually changed society through their actions or currently spend their golden years driving around the country in crumbling vans with unwashed beards reminiscing about the great old days of stink


Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Muh Dick on December 07, 2014, 08:53:09 AM
Quote
Ferguson, Eric Garner and Why Death Should Outrage Us

:ultlibrage:

Quote
Until this month, I had no idea that black moms teach their sons how to survive police encounters. It's called "The Talk," and black boys get it as soon as they start hitting puberty, because their moms realize that there's apparently nothing scarier to cops than a black teenager. I can barely manage reminders for my kids to wear their deodorant. The only good news in this crapstorm of awful is that history tells us that moments like these birth the changes that mean better futures.
:say:
(http://i.imgur.com/gnoPMyZ.jpg)

Quote
#4. Shut Up About Riots, White People
:say:
(http://i.imgur.com/gnoPMyZ.jpg)

and on and on and on

the ending is just the best though:

Quote
We've been mad about a lot of stuff this year. School shootings, sexual harassment, more sexual harassment, oh, and those kidnapped Nigerian school girls are still missing. It's been eight months, so I'm guessing that when we find them, they're going to have some newborn babies that need rescuing as well. That's assuming anyone is still looking.

See what I did there? I got mad all over again. That's a good thing. NOTHING CHANGES when people aren't mad. Two years ago, I was one of those foolheads who shared the Kony 2012 video, and I swear to God I'd do it again. I have zero ill will against a filmmaker who raised awareness about one of the world's biggest evils. Why are we still more mad at the guy who made that movie than we are at Joseph Kony? "Kony 2012" is a hilarious joke that people make when they want to bring up a dumb fad that we were all into for 24 hours. Not hilarious: child soldiers.

Oh crap, I digressed again. My point is that I suspect these constant spurts of outrage aren't for nothing. You're not a bad person for hashtagging a cause. In fact, I think we're going to look back on these heady days of hashtag activism as the Civil Rights Movement of the Twenty-Tweenies, assuming that's what we end up calling this decade. We're the new hippies, you guys. And like it or not, hippies changed the world by being loud and stupid-looking and unafraid of looking back on their passionate big talk with regret.

The scariest thing isn't looking back and getting embarrassed that you reblogged the Kony video, the scariest thing is looking back and realizing you never got angry at all.

yeah, getting mad on the internet is really a productive thing to do, and leads to a lot of change

SIGNAL BOOST THIS WITH PROPER OUTRAGE, PEOPLE :christina:

So, where in the flying fuck is the FUNNY in that damn screed? Cracked IS a HUMOR site, right?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on December 07, 2014, 11:01:50 AM
Sure, just like SA.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Obese-n-Triggered on December 07, 2014, 12:10:26 PM
Sure, just like SA.

 :nixon:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on December 07, 2014, 12:24:25 PM
So when exactly does the West hit peak OUTRAGE fatigue? At what point will we collectively just stop acting like we have to give a single fuck about every little thing that comes up?
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Whig Historian on December 07, 2014, 12:55:15 PM
So when exactly does the West hit peak OUTRAGE fatigue? At what point will we collectively just stop acting like we have to give a single fuck about every little thing that comes up?
Probably not until the grid fails and people no longer have the time (or forum) to status-whore through staged shows of anger.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: hair sniffing boner diary on December 07, 2014, 04:21:58 PM
Quote
We've been mad about a lot of stuff this year. School shootings, sexual harassment, more sexual harassment, oh, and those kidnapped Nigerian school girls are still missing. It's been eight months, so I'm guessing that when we find them, they're going to have some newborn babies that need rescuing as well. That's assuming anyone is still looking.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ueZ6tvqhk8U
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pinochet Airways on December 10, 2014, 02:41:35 AM
I don't think THE TALK is a thing exclusive to black people.

I don't know about y'all, but my parents always told me not to mess with the police and be polite because they carry a gun and can screw up your life forever.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 10, 2014, 08:01:19 AM
In fact if you don't have the talk with your children, whatever race or social income class they are, you are a terrible parent because it doesn't matter who you are, if you do stupid shit with the cops there are consequences up to being killed.

It's not like a white kid doing what Michael Brown did would have survived, it's just that no one would have given a crap about some trailer park white trash charging at a cop getting shot except for saying 'good riddance, one less of those'
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 10, 2014, 08:31:03 AM
also lmao what a fucking gay website, always one of those articles whenever i go there nowadays

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-ignorant-jokes-from-last-comedians-youd-expect/
Quote
5 Ignorant Jokes From the Last Comedians You'd Expect

THAT'S IGN'NANT!
(http://i.imgur.com/3yErmsv.gif)

Quote
That's why, when a comic actually pushes the envelope with smart, thought-out, witty, edgy, progressive material, I both drop to my knees in appreciation and curse them out for writing those awesome jokes before I could. The problem with comedians who embody everything I just wrote and am too lazy to copy-paste is that when they fuck up and write ignorant, sub-intellectual humor, they actually look dumber than the people who write that swill full-time. If Babe Ruth swings at a batting tee, misses the ball, slips on dirt, and lands on his ass, that's way worse than when a scrawny, unathletic toddler does it.

what kind of a faggot has 'is it progressive enough, comrade?' has a criteria for humor? cracked writers in the year 2014, apparently

Quote
#5. George Carlin's Uneducated (and Plagiarized) Defense of the Word "Indian"
:madgoon:

Quote
Aside from his misguided belief that Jason is a stupid name, George Carlin wasn't really wrong about much. His opinions were extremely inflammatory, and certainly not everyone agreed with them, but there was usually something -- observable logic, verifiable facts, educated theories -- backing up his naughty words and fart jokes. He never just pulled a shitty argument out of his ass for the sake of having material.
:sjw:

Quote
One of Carlin's favorite activities was to pick on clumsy, politically correct euphemisms. His 1997 book Brain Droppings pissed all over the term "Native American," calling it a "pussified, trendy, bullshit phrase." On the other hand, he felt "Indian" was a perfectly acceptable and honorable name for people, even though they were only called that because some dumbass white dude thought he was in India.
           :say:
(http://i.imgur.com/DizSvpl.jpg?1)


Quote
If that wasn't enough, Carlin wrote that "India" wasn't even a thing back in 1492, as the area in question was known as Hindustan. So not only is Columbus suddenly not a genocidal racist, he's also a genius navigator who didn't just pratfall his way onto a landmass he knew squat about.[/b]

That one genuinely pisses me off. Describing fucking Columbus has a bumbling genocidal racist is just so far off from the truth I actually want to smack him. Then he went on to use Google Translate to prove that Carlin was wrong, so I was just left at laughing at him being such a massive faggot and moved on.

Quote
#4. Louis C.K. Has No Idea What a Vagina Is
:madgoon:

Quote
C.K. kicked off his 2008 stand-up show Chewed Up with several minutes about something that gets chewed up a lot -- vaginas. According to him, even though he enjoys saying the word "cunt," he doesn't like using it to describe a vagina. Good for him? You go, girl? Nope, not really. Actually, not at all. Because to him, the word "cunt" is strong and harsh, where an actual vagina is ... adorable. "Vaginas are so sweet. They're little pretty things, with little flower petal-y lips." That's a view of ladyparts so ignorant, a 100-year-old monk born and raised in the monastery that he never left, not even to hit the corner store and get milk to pour over his Halo Nut Cheerios, would look at him and say, "Really, guy? Really."

He continues on with the most inaccurate description of anything since Mama Wilkes Booth described her son as "quirky," by claiming he hears a gentle little piccolo in his head whenever he sees a vagina, as opposed to the mass of fucking lambeg drums that would realistically accompany an organ capable of passing ten pounds of wriggling flesh in under a workday.

Louis then proposes we stop calling vaginas "vaginas," because even that's too tough a word for such a delicate instrument of princessy innocence. His pitch: call it a "falalalalalalala" because if a vagina had legs, its two lips would spend all day skipping and frolicking through the tulips. He also feels there should be a beautiful butterfly fluttering around every vagina like in a damn fairy tale, though good luck convincing the powerful Butterfly Union to include that in their next contract.

But besides being totally inaccurate, why else is Louis dead wrong? After all, calling something "pretty" and "sweet" is normally a compliment, right? Well, as pointed out by fellow Cracked writer and non-fellow vagina owner Amanda Mannen, it's patronizing as fuck. It's a dude headcanoning something he doesn't own and re-imagining it as an instrument of pure happiness and pleasure. Namely, his happiness and pleasure. It's the old "pussy on a pedestal" way of thinking. They don't go there. They go wherever their owner wants them to go.
:lilal:

Quote
#2. Weird Al Gets Accidentally Racist With "Taco Grande"
:madgoon:

Quote
Amazingly, some people still see Weird Al as a mere goofball novelty singer, because they're idiots. Al's a legitimate musical and comedic genius, capable of playing in any style and making an intelligent and subversive mockery of virtually anyone -- except for Latinos, apparently. Because then, his intelligent and subversive message becomes "teehee, your culture's funny."

Al's 1992 album Off the Deep End features a takeoff of Gerardo's "Rico Suave," because when Weird Al parodies your song, you know you've made it as an artist. Yankovic's version is called "Taco Grande," and you'll never in a million billion years guess what it's about. On the surface, it's whatever -- Al's written about food more than Anthony Bourdain, so what's another ode to pre-poop? But where "Fat" took a song by a really skinny dude and turned it into an ode to girth, "Taco Grande" took a song by a Latino and turned it into four minutes of a Latino guy who worships Qdoba.
:madgoon:

Quote
#1. Bill Hicks' Pity Party About Being Stuck in the Friendzone
:ultlibrage:

Quote
Hicks despised anything he felt inhibited human progress, meaning he hated 99 percent of things (except smoking, but that was more a murderous addiction than a spiritual belief). But most of all, he hated stupid, loud, macho men, both for destroying the planet with their alpha male shit and for ... fucking all the women? Apparently, yeah. Hicks, more than once, riffed about how he -- a good, smart, respectful person who wouldn't hurt anyone except maybe Billy Ray Cyrus -- hasn't gotten laid in forever, but every grr grunt punch caveman on the planet rolls in ladies every night.

This was no more evident than during Hick's second album, Relentless. Hicks, who also dabbled in music, recorded a ditty called "Chicks Dig Jerks." It's exactly what the title suggests -- he spends five minutes whining about being stuck in the Friendzone. I'm not exaggerating in the least:

In Bill's world, there are two types of men: decent dudes, and the scum of the fucking Universe. No in-betweenies. Bill is, reluctantly, in Group 1 -- sentenced to a world without love and a bed without ladyparts because he's too darn nice.

Maybe don't call a strange woman "babe"? That might help your hoochie-coochie cause. And how do you know that guy's a jerk? Is he actively hitting her or screaming at her? Because if so, calling 911 is probably a nicer route to take than throwing up your arms and going "aww". But who am I kidding? He probably just looks like a jerk, AKA Not You.

And then, the real Friendzone bullshit begins, with some strawwoman uttering lines like "You're so sweet / can't we just be friends? / I think of you as a brother." Yep, a brother who's gone on record as saying "Hitler had the right idea, he was just an underachiever." Wonder if that played a role in your dry spell any.

:ultlibrage: :ultlibrage: :ultlibrage:

what a fucking worthless article devoid of laughs. Fuck that guy:
(http://i.imgur.com/DizSvpl.jpg?1)
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 10, 2014, 08:36:34 AM
i think this is seriously the worst shit ive read on cracked, and the comments are universally panning him and calling him a faggot while the sjw brigade is mostly silent or even calling him sexist for his opinions on women lol
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: unprivsplain on December 10, 2014, 08:44:06 AM
Besides the overall level of faggotry, there's a weird thing (and probably edited in because it's cracked) where he gives weird nick names to things. There's the dumbass white dude for Columbus, and calling food pre-poop. I'm not sure what the point of it is, but it makes me think even less of its writers.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on December 10, 2014, 08:46:52 AM
Woah yeah, the comments really are ripping that cunt a new one.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: 888 Didnt Read Shit on December 10, 2014, 09:32:53 AM
Besides the overall level of faggotry, there's a weird thing (and probably edited in because it's cracked) where he gives weird nick names to things. There's the dumbass white dude for Columbus, and calling food pre-poop. I'm not sure what the point of it is, but it makes me think even less of its writers.

Columbus Day is magical because you are reminded which of your friends need a punch in the face for being such pozz'd out faggots
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on December 10, 2014, 11:46:01 AM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21822_5-studies-that-prove-racism-still-way-worse-than-we-think.html

Lol
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on December 10, 2014, 12:28:17 PM
http://www.cracked.com/article_21822_5-studies-that-prove-racism-still-way-worse-than-we-think.html

Lol

Quote
A group of researchers led by Katherine Milkman at the University of Pennsylvania wanted to see if professors responded differently to unsolicited emails reaching out for mentorships, depending on whether said request came from Todd Stevenson, Jenny Bluth, or Lamar McPersonofcolorston. After emailing more than 6,500 professors at the top 250 schools in the country, they found that names that sounded like they belonged to minorities and women were as much as 25 percent less likely to get a positive reply than white-sounding male names, such as Channing Butterworth.

Yes, because even the most pozzed of professors is still smart enough to know that keeping white males around means the threat of a pointless lawsuit, sexual harassment claims, or general monkeyshines are no longer a problem.

Also the white guys had to earn it. No special quotas or lowered bars for  :goonette: or :tyrone: apply to them.

Actions and policies have consequences, and people behave in their own self interest. This eludes liberals.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Backpfeifengesicht on December 10, 2014, 03:29:09 PM
That garbage article boils down to a little faggot too young to remember Rico Suave who has obviously never heard of Georgia "Yes All My Paintings are Flower-Vaginas" O'Keeffe telling us what is approved comedy. And it's not even new material, he's reaching back to Carlin and early 90's Weird Al parodies, Ministry of Truth style.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 10, 2014, 04:31:25 PM
That garbage article boils down to a little faggot too young to remember Rico Suave who has obviously never heard of Georgia "Yes All My Paintings are Flower-Vaginas" O'Keeffe telling us what is approved comedy. And it's not even new material, he's reaching back to Carlin and early 90's Weird Al parodies, Ministry of Truth style.

i will also never get why beta faggots deny the existence of the friendzone either

sometimes you want to bone/get boned someone of the opposite/same sex, but they just want friendship. what's the big fucking deal? :shrug:
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Pizza Cancellation Specialist on December 10, 2014, 05:51:38 PM
That garbage article boils down to a little faggot too young to remember Rico Suave who has obviously never heard of Georgia "Yes All My Paintings are Flower-Vaginas" O'Keeffe telling us what is approved comedy. And it's not even new material, he's reaching back to Carlin and early 90's Weird Al parodies, Ministry of Truth style.

i will also never get why beta faggots deny the existence of the friendzone either

sometimes you want to bone/get boned someone of the opposite/same sex, but they just want friendship. what's the big fucking deal? :shrug:

Yeah you know what I gotta be honest the  :madgoon: about the whole concept of 'the friend zone' in the last year has baffled the shit out of me. It went from an innocuous, helpful phrase everyone has been using as long as I can remember to some horrible trigger to people.

If you're an attractive woman, you have a few options.
1. Have zero straight male friends
2. Fuck every single man who wants to fuck you
3. Understand that you'll have some male friends who want a sexual relationship, but keep them on as friends anyway


By denying the idea of 'the friend zone', you are basically trying (and failing) to rob women of choice. Men too. I've got a friend, she's funny, she cooks and bakes for me sometime, and she's a blast to get drunk with, but she's big and fat and not attractive. She has made advances to me before, and I gently let her down because I'm not interested. The friendship is valuable enough to me to tolerate a handful of short awkward moments, its valuable enough to her to hang around me knowing its not going to advance beyond that. I have friend zoned her. Its not evil, its not the end of the world.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on December 10, 2014, 06:47:08 PM
That garbage article boils down to a little faggot too young to remember Rico Suave who has obviously never heard of Georgia "Yes All My Paintings are Flower-Vaginas" O'Keeffe telling us what is approved comedy. And it's not even new material, he's reaching back to Carlin and early 90's Weird Al parodies, Ministry of Truth style.

i will also never get why beta faggots deny the existence of the friendzone either

sometimes you want to bone/get boned someone of the opposite/same sex, but they just want friendship. what's the big fucking deal? :shrug:

95% of "friendzone" bullshit is goons carrying printers uphill in the snow and wondering why their dick remains dry, and then raging about it on the internet and how all women are cunts, etc.
5% is actual manipulative cunts who string said desparate goons along for attention and/or printing services.

The friendzone exists, but almost always the person keeping you there is you.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: The Watcher on December 10, 2014, 08:44:54 PM
That garbage article boils down to a little faggot too young to remember Rico Suave who has obviously never heard of Georgia "Yes All My Paintings are Flower-Vaginas" O'Keeffe telling us what is approved comedy. And it's not even new material, he's reaching back to Carlin and early 90's Weird Al parodies, Ministry of Truth style.

i will also never get why beta faggots deny the existence of the friendzone either

sometimes you want to bone/get boned someone of the opposite/same sex, but they just want friendship. what's the big fucking deal? :shrug:

95% of "friendzone" bullshit is goons carrying printers uphill in the snow and wondering why their dick remains dry, and then raging about it on the internet and how all women are cunts, etc.
5% is actual manipulative cunts who string said desparate goons along for attention and/or printing services.

The friendzone exists, but almost always the person keeping you there is you.
From what I have witnessed; it is closer to 45% 55% split.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Psycho Dad on December 10, 2014, 11:22:15 PM
Has anybody yet said that Luke McKinney was the faggot responsible for introducing all this poz to Cracked?

The place had the occasional funny shit when junkies and drunks were free to be themselves (see John Cheese) but then went downhill like a Buick with a Sears brake job when Luke came in and "educated" all of the staff and inspired them to sober up (see John Cheese).

I stopped reading after that fucking homo queer shitbag started infecting the rest of the staff. Goddamn bunch of poz zombies now.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Ghostse on December 11, 2014, 06:21:18 AM
From what I have witnessed; it is closer to 45% 55% split.

My metric usually is "Have you told the other person you like them as more than a friend/want to be more than friends?" before friendzoning blame shifts from you to them. Most betanerds never reach this point.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Triggered by Pepe on December 11, 2014, 08:17:50 AM
Something has fucked up. I've tried to tell people that friendzoning is ok, that you can be in the friendzone, still want to bang them but know you won't because she won't let you. The trick is most people move on and try with someone else.

Problems start happening when a betacunt gets into this position, because they can't let go. Because said betacunt exists and is the only person willing to talk to the fucking headcases that rail against the friendzone, they only ever experience the "can't let go" part and don't understand that if they were normal they'd be able experience the other side.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: famous woman on December 11, 2014, 08:36:22 AM
Quote
Ferguson, Eric Garner and Why Death Should Outrage Us

Why Death Should.Outrage Us

Why Anger is Problematic

Why Rain is Never Okay

Why Babies Happen

Why Words Exist and How to Stamp Them Out

Why Worms and Gross Bugs are Constantly Upskirting You

Why There Are Piles of Trash, Garbage and Diapers in My Dwelling-Place

Why the Atmosphere is Literally Crushing Us

Why the Metal Face in the Sky Still Thinks it's Okay to Oppress Me, in 2014
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Hollywood Shabat Goy Yaro on December 11, 2014, 01:38:16 PM
I don't think there is a single male feminist / beta out there who has strictly platonic friendships with the opposite sex.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: Rape Artist on December 11, 2014, 02:07:44 PM
Just because you'd gladly fuck your female friend given the chance doesn't mean your friendship is invalid.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SooperPooper on December 11, 2014, 03:06:40 PM
Just because you'd gladly fuck your female friend given the chance doesn't mean your friendship is invalid.

Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: internet culture on December 11, 2014, 08:27:41 PM
I don't think there is a single male feminist / beta out there who has strictly platonic friendships with the opposite sex.
I've seen at least one gay man who's a "sexism is power plus prejudice"-type feminist

this stuff is taking over gay culture so if you're a gay man and you're not on board with it then you're a bigot oppressor too
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on December 11, 2014, 08:33:13 PM
Friend zone is just something people take way too literally and between the mra and she ppl built it up into this complex system. It just means,guy or girl, they don't have any sexual interest in you. Friendzone was just a funny turn of phrase when I was in middle school.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: EaglesDick on December 11, 2014, 08:34:11 PM
I don't think there is a single male feminist / beta out there who has strictly platonic friendships with the opposite sex.
I've seen at least one gay man who's a "sexism is power plus prejudice"-type feminist

this stuff is taking over gay culture so if you're a gay man and you're not on board with it then you're a bigot oppressor too
sedanchair is playing the men can't be victims because of privilege card in the uva rape thread.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: SSOUL TRANN on December 12, 2014, 01:14:47 AM
Friendzone rhymes with end zone and that's a football term so it's very problematic and shitty you MRA PUA bigot shitlord dudebro rapist.
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: level 69 memelord on December 12, 2014, 02:45:59 AM
the whole indian/in dios thing was totally bogus and carlin was really stupid for falling for it
Title: Re: Is Cracked going the way of SA? aka SJWs pozzing up humor all over the place
Post by: cis scum 1.0 on December 12, 2014, 10:34:45 AM
This is amazing. All of this :christina: :ultlibrage: bullshit

Quote
5 Nice Things You Do Daily (That Secretly Ruin the World)

#3. Good Conversational