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Author Topic: Cracked going the way of SA, SJW pozzing up humor all over the place  (Read 327262 times)

cis scum 1.0

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decided to check today, and still full of sjw bullshit. FAn article called "5 everyday annouances that are actually worldwide disasters" which can be summed up as ' AMERICANS RUIN THE WORLD :madgoon: '

Traffic jams = global warming, too many ads on tv = turns you into a robot for The Man, bad weather forecasts = we need more socialized style government where we put more tax money on that shit, brief power outages = same shit, spam emails = pollutions and scams and shit

Yeah, a website supposed to be about humor and weird shit just went on a Ralph Nader rant from 1995.

It's not even as bad as "5 Unfortunate Biases Hard Coded into your DNA", which should have been called "5 reasons why white cis males should die"

5. You think Dark-skinned people are bad!
4. You don't respect fat people!
3. Women are only boobs and asses and vaginas to you!
2. You don't really care about the poor!
1. You're happy with your privilege and think you're better than everyone!

The comments also love the article, and include gems like

- A german guy who took a University test and realized because of it that he's actually prejudiced against Black people even though he barely ever met any in his life, and he doesn't feel hatred or has racist thoughts on a subconsious level
- Doctors are jerks to the obese!
- "If only black Africans had colonized America instead of white Europeans" (lmao)
- hegel posts there: "Nothing quite like a person telling you how modern feminism is pointless and sexist, while addressing this to your tits. Yes this has happened to me."



the list goes on and on. burn cracked to the ground

cis scum 1.0

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Turn on the TV right now and watch any comedy show. It doesn't have to actually be funny; it just has to be attempting to make jokes. Odds are you'll see one or two mildly racist jokes, maybe a couple of religious jokes, and a freaking avalanche of fat jokes. Making fun of fatties is the "last acceptable prejudice," because deep down we all associate being fat with being a terrible person. Why else would you try to drown yourself in Cheetos if not to consciously rid the world of your own horribleness?

The prejudice is so ingrained, we don't even know we have it, and it is getting worse -- weight discrimination has increased 66 percent in the past two decades. It starts early, too. A study in the U.K. found that kids as young as 4 assume that fat children have fewer friends, are less likely to be invited to parties, and are dumber than slim children, based on absolutely no knowledge of the children in question beyond their physical appearance. These same biases follow them into adulthood -- a separate study found that doctors who specifically treat obesity tend to think that fat people are lazy and stupid, findings that were presumably reinforced by the doctors' inclination to prescribe roller skates and book learnin' to their overweight patients.

Even more troubling, it turns out that male jurors, specifically thin male jurors, are more likely to convict an overweight person, especially if the accused is a woman (this is called "the Hamburglar effect," by us, just now). So just by being overweight, your chances of going to jail increase. People are also more likely to judge their bosses harshly and consider them less effective if they are overweight, even if their size doesn't affect their job in any way, and obese people (particularly obese women) actually earn less money than their colleagues. Considering that half the population is going to be staggeringly overweight within a few decades, we assume this prejudice is going to develop into fat people shunning slightly fatter people based on the size of their Rascal scooters rather than their actual waistlines.

 :lf:

The Trumpriarch

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Good. The more disadvantages that fat people face the better. Being fat needs to be made as unappealing as possible.
cry "bigot!" and let slip the troons of war

Aran

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Fat is where it's at.

sex bot semen tank

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will someone knock winston "888" rowntree off his soapbox already.

e: oh holy lol. these people are fucking broken

« Last Edit: November 26, 2013, 01:01:26 PM by DICKS CURE DYKES »


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It's identity creating. Suddenly, it means something when you say you're a Slytherin, in the same way it means something to say you're a reformed Jew.

cis scum 1.0

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I keep trying to read the 5 biases in your DNA but it's so hard. I mean the list open with this:

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I've told you before that we're all more racist than we think
:christina: x 1000

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Unless you have avoided every single form of media for your entire life, you are probably aware that women are viewed as sexual objects in a way that men just aren't. However, we are so conditioned to this behavior that both men and women are equally guilty of looking at a female body as no more than a collection of round, bouncy parts.

All the women on tv shows, movies and video games are model quality while the men are just your average joe looking perfectly normal, and not models with perfectly sculpted abs, and there is absolutely no objectification of men in media directed toward women the same way there is of women when directed toward men. Just take the twilight movies, it's all about women tits and ass, not glistening vampire abs and shit.

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n general, you are more likely to recognize objects through their individual pieces, but our brains seemed evolutionarily primed to see other humans as single entities, rather than a set of arms and legs. Except for women, whom we literally view as objects.

hegel.txt

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When you pass homeless people on the street, there is a good chance you look away, or check your watch, or play dead to avoid having to speak to them. Sometimes you might give that person money, but you would be hard-pressed to recall anything about their appearance once you walked away. That's because science has proven that you care about that homeless person even less than you could've ever imagined.

Yeah it's not because the brain is wired in such a way that useless information, including the faces of people we think we will never see again, is immediately discarded. We never instantly forget who the cashier at a gas station or convenience store is if don't see them on a daily basis, it's just that our brains hate homeless people.

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On paper, it seems ridiculous that people would devote so much time and money to a bunch of strangers playing a game they have absolutely nothing invested in and no possible way of affecting the outcome. Yet people will tattoo their bodies, end friendships, destroy relationships, and even start freaking riots just to prove their team (or "group") is better than everyone else's. The groups don't even stay the same -- team rosters change, sometimes on a yearly basis. People aren't devoted to the people in the group, but to the idea of the group itself, and they will attack you (verbally or physically) for even daring to wear the shirt of a different group in their presence.

bleep bloop bleep bloop what is this "sports" thing what you are talking makes no logical sense bleep bloop sports fans are violent alpha males bleep bloop engage evade subroutine

:aspero:

Failure to communicate

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Holy fuck this "Racist DNA" shit.  It's like this is pushing for mandatory diversity classes because you have to wash away the evil born sin of racism (of course, only whites need attend, everyone else's DNA is pure!)

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I've told you before that we're all more racist than we think. Many cultures have a fashion bias against darker skin. For example, last year in India, people bought over 230 metric tons of skin-lightening cream. Back in 2008, the cosmetics company L'Oreal was accused of lightening Beyonce Knowles' complexion in a series of ads, as if her blackness would suddenly terrify the millions of fans she'd earned around the globe over the previous decade.

When this shit starts out with a comparison of the western world with India (which is so racist it makes the KKK look like a goddamn diversity rally) and one instance of a single advertising company which was probably fired right after, you know they're grasping for all the tiniest straws they can get their hands on.

wimpb

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theres all this chatter about how we're all racist but they never actually explain why racism is bad

Backpfeifengesicht

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will someone knock winston "888" rowntree off his soapbox already.

e: oh holy lol. these people are fucking broken



How are they still getting away with insinuating people they don't like/agree with must be gay? Isn't that thoughtcrime?
Quote from: George Lincoln Rockwell
The Conservatives have a slogan which I think is despicable and defeatist: "It's better to be dead than red." And the Commies and Liberals have a slogan which is even worse, it's treason, they say: "It's better to be red than dead." We say this: "You don't have to be Red and you don't have to be Dead. Not dead. Not Red. Dead Reds"


Justice Dredd

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Except for women, whom we literally view as objects.

 :facepalm:

Small Weinered Goon

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Who are these faggots at Cracked trying to impress?  This kind of house nigger type of white male guilt has to be really taxing on the psyche.

marlon perkins

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Now more than ever we need the viruscomix emot.
"In the end, I believe that prosperity allows more room for people to bellyache.
, Sterling G Mace"


marlon perkins

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Today's "Five everyday occurrences that are actually disasters" was literally* written by a hyperventilating fat 14 year old girl.

"In the end, I believe that prosperity allows more room for people to bellyache.
, Sterling G Mace"


wimpb

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Except for women, whom we literally view as objects.

 :facepalm:

when the only woman in your life is a fleshlight you might think everyone views women the same way you do

The Watcher

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will someone knock winston "888" rowntree off his soapbox already.

e: oh holy lol. these people are fucking broken


Lets make one of these for SA
His name was Harry Anderson

Backpfeifengesicht

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will someone knock winston "888" rowntree off his soapbox already.

e: oh holy lol. these people are fucking broken


Lets make one of these for SA

It would all translate to "I hate myself." Maybe one or two "NO, FUCK YOU DAD"s.
Quote from: George Lincoln Rockwell
The Conservatives have a slogan which I think is despicable and defeatist: "It's better to be dead than red." And the Commies and Liberals have a slogan which is even worse, it's treason, they say: "It's better to be red than dead." We say this: "You don't have to be Red and you don't have to be Dead. Not dead. Not Red. Dead Reds"


Gas Chamber of Commerce

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I stopped reading cracked back when that stupid fucking article on sexism was posted a few months ago. I used to respect Wong and Cheese a lot for their articles, but that SJW clickbait is just too easy money for them to pass up.

This thread was like identifying a body at the morgue. Yes that's him, you can put the sheet back over him now.

Failure to communicate

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This just in : The author of that "Racist DNA" article is a goddamn manatee.



I-is that a skin suit? :stonk: Jesus fucking christ.  I think it sees us.  Don't flinch, it's vision is based on movement.

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wtf is wrong with her skin :stonk:
Trigger warning: the second video contains powerful audio of the manís fragmented urine stream.

Bitter Weirdo

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Look at the fucking orange peel in that makeup. Bitch needs to be wet sanded for a while.

Pizza Cancellation Specialist

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Her face looks like if you touch it it would give in and crumble like old cake. It is disturbing.
I have a pet conspiracy theory about Lil Yachty. The Jews made him famous to put all the marginally talented blacks like Jay-Z and whomever on notice that their fame and fortune has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with any talent they might have. Jewish producers can take the most retarded nigger they can find, a guy so dumb he can't even write his own name, hook him up to autotone, and make him a star. They don't need Jay-Z; Jay-Z needs them.

Hollywood Shabat Goy Yaro

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That is one of the deadest pair of eyes I've ever seen.


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Don't pick a fight with Al Franken, this is the guy who in truth should be President. Smart, ethical and generally a good person. And he is a comic so in a verbal war he will make you look stupid.

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Thanks Maureen. I've been dealing with that pedantic argument of not being able to spell makes me an idiot since grade school. I'm autistic with a 130+ iq who writes a graphic novel about sex abuse and with an obsession about pshycology to the point I'm more informed than my therapists about current news.

Harry D Greek

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This just in : The author of that "Racist DNA" article is a goddamn manatee.



I-is that a skin suit? :stonk: Jesus fucking christ.  I think it sees us.  Don't flinch, it's vision is based on movement.

lol, anyone who writes articles like that should have to put their picture up next to it so people can know that the article isn't based on actually interacting with people irl
Quote from: a man with an asymmetrical haircut
This was posted on the page before, but I was only able to catch up on this thread now. I'd like to point out that not all lesbian relationships have two vaginas, and it really sucks as a queer trans woman to hear this sort of generalization all the time.

Quote from: Vargo
Just realized Billy Oceans "get out of my dreams (and into my car)" is pretty blatantly about street harassment

cis scum 1.0

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two thoughts:

1) that could easily be a tranny
2) cracked's very own fistgrrl

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lol, anyone who writes articles like that should have to put their picture up next to it so people can know that the article isn't based on actually interacting with people irl

you know she's pissed that she's never been seen as "just a pair of breasts"
« Last Edit: November 27, 2013, 06:19:21 PM by cis scum »

marlon perkins

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Look at the fucking orange peel in that makeup. Bitch needs to be wet sanded for a while.

Strip back to the bare metal, scrub with steel wool, remix primer with more flow improver, respray.

Yes I did spend time working in an auto body shop in my teens why do you ask.
"In the end, I believe that prosperity allows more room for people to bellyache.
, Sterling G Mace"