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Author Topic: Funny Shit From The News  (Read 167176 times)

Dem Wypipo

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4975 on: February 17, 2018, 10:22:05 PM »
+7
Goddamn, they really are a cancer, aren't they?

Edit: Supposedly it is fake news but not to worry, he'll be saying it here soon enough.
« Last Edit: February 17, 2018, 10:26:47 PM by Dem Wypipo »

amulet of faggotry +2

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4976 on: February 18, 2018, 02:06:52 PM »
+2
Not much of a rabbi, he's missing two candles

InsideOutside

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4977 on: February 18, 2018, 10:44:51 PM »
+12
Looks like its the beginning of the end for diagnosing Autism off a Facebook quiz and collecting disability:

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2018/feb/19/autism-children-blood-urine-test

Quote
Scientists in Britain say they have developed a blood and urine test that can detect autism in children.

Researchers at the University of Warwick said the test, believed to be the first of its kind, could lead to earlier diagnosis of autism spectrum disorders (ASD) in children who could then be given appropriate treatment much earlier in their lives.

Scientists said their research found a link between ASD and damage to proteins in blood plasma. They found the most reliable of the tests they developed was examining protein in blood plasma, which found children with ASD had higher levels of the oxidation marker dityrosine (DT) and certain sugar-modified compounds called advanced glycation end-products (AGEs).

Genetic causes are thought to be responsible for about a third of cases of ASD, while the rest are believed to be caused by a combination of environmental factors, mutations, and rare genetic variants. However, researchers believe their new tests could reveal yet-to-be-identified causes of ASD.

They also confirmed the previously held belief that mutations of amino acid transporters are a genetic variant associated with ASD.

The Warwick team worked with collaborators at the University of Bologna in Italy, who recruited 38 children who had been diagnosed with ASD along with a control group of 31 other children between the ages of five and 12. Blood and urine samples were taken from the children for analysis.

The Warwick team discovered there were chemical differences between the two groups. Working with a further collaborator at the University of Birmingham, the changes in multiple compounds were combined using artificial intelligence algorithm techniques to develop a mathematical equation to distinguish between ASD and healthy controls. The outcome was a diagnostic test better than any existing method.

The research has been published in the journal Molecular Autism.

#TimesUp fauxtists


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Dog-O-Tron 5000v4.0

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4979 on: February 19, 2018, 08:19:56 AM »
+4
Looks like its the beginning of the end for diagnosing Autism off a Facebook quiz and collecting disability:

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2018/feb/19/autism-children-blood-urine-test

Quote
Scientists in Britain say they have developed a blood and urine test that can detect autism in children.

Researchers at the University of Warwick said the test, believed to be the first of its kind, could lead to earlier diagnosis of autism spectrum disorders (ASD) in children who could then be given appropriate treatment much earlier in their lives.

Scientists said their research found a link between ASD and damage to proteins in blood plasma. They found the most reliable of the tests they developed was examining protein in blood plasma, which found children with ASD had higher levels of the oxidation marker dityrosine (DT) and certain sugar-modified compounds called advanced glycation end-products (AGEs).

Genetic causes are thought to be responsible for about a third of cases of ASD, while the rest are believed to be caused by a combination of environmental factors, mutations, and rare genetic variants. However, researchers believe their new tests could reveal yet-to-be-identified causes of ASD.

They also confirmed the previously held belief that mutations of amino acid transporters are a genetic variant associated with ASD.

The Warwick team worked with collaborators at the University of Bologna in Italy, who recruited 38 children who had been diagnosed with ASD along with a control group of 31 other children between the ages of five and 12. Blood and urine samples were taken from the children for analysis.

The Warwick team discovered there were chemical differences between the two groups. Working with a further collaborator at the University of Birmingham, the changes in multiple compounds were combined using artificial intelligence algorithm techniques to develop a mathematical equation to distinguish between ASD and healthy controls. The outcome was a diagnostic test better than any existing method.

The research has been published in the journal Molecular Autism.

#TimesUp fauxtists

LOL is you think mere science will stop these Munchausen Moms from speaking their "truths".

:niggershine:

kornbeef

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4980 on: February 19, 2018, 07:11:36 PM »
+1
detect autism in children?  more like detecting autism in your posts

InsideOutside

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4981 on: February 19, 2018, 07:57:24 PM »
+4
Looks like its the beginning of the end for diagnosing Autism off a Facebook quiz and collecting disability:

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2018/feb/19/autism-children-blood-urine-test

Quote
Scientists in Britain say they have developed a blood and urine test that can detect autism in children.

Researchers at the University of Warwick said the test, believed to be the first of its kind, could lead to earlier diagnosis of autism spectrum disorders (ASD) in children who could then be given appropriate treatment much earlier in their lives.

Scientists said their research found a link between ASD and damage to proteins in blood plasma. They found the most reliable of the tests they developed was examining protein in blood plasma, which found children with ASD had higher levels of the oxidation marker dityrosine (DT) and certain sugar-modified compounds called advanced glycation end-products (AGEs).

Genetic causes are thought to be responsible for about a third of cases of ASD, while the rest are believed to be caused by a combination of environmental factors, mutations, and rare genetic variants. However, researchers believe their new tests could reveal yet-to-be-identified causes of ASD.

They also confirmed the previously held belief that mutations of amino acid transporters are a genetic variant associated with ASD.

The Warwick team worked with collaborators at the University of Bologna in Italy, who recruited 38 children who had been diagnosed with ASD along with a control group of 31 other children between the ages of five and 12. Blood and urine samples were taken from the children for analysis.

The Warwick team discovered there were chemical differences between the two groups. Working with a further collaborator at the University of Birmingham, the changes in multiple compounds were combined using artificial intelligence algorithm techniques to develop a mathematical equation to distinguish between ASD and healthy controls. The outcome was a diagnostic test better than any existing method.

The research has been published in the journal Molecular Autism.

#TimesUp fauxtists

LOL is you think mere science will stop these Munchausen Moms from speaking their "truths".

:niggershine:

They can continue shouting it from the goddamn rafters and I hope they do. I want them to amp up the noise. But much like all the dumb bitches on Oprah who claim to be the daughter of Anastasia, lets laugh when they shuck and jive about taking a blood test.

I fucking love science, but not if it contradicts my self diagnosed autism!

Dem Wypipo

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4982 on: February 19, 2018, 10:53:26 PM »
+14
"My girl friend Breelynne told me that autism test was dangerous.  She recommended that I can tell if my son is autistic if I buy these essential oils instead!"
                                                                                                         \

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4983 on: February 20, 2018, 12:01:01 AM »
+4
"My girl friend Breelynne told me that autism test was dangerous.  She recommended that I can tell if my son is autistic if I buy these essential oils instead!"
                                                                                                         \


It's not autism. Little Dawsunn is an indigo child!
      :say:
   :christina:

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Dem Wypipo

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4985 on: February 20, 2018, 07:09:48 AM »
+8
Rocket's senility is showing yet again

Rob Halford's Scrotal Sack

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4986 on: February 21, 2018, 09:41:46 AM »
+6
Just murder anyone who claims to be autistic. Suddenly nobody is autistic anymore.  :jesse:

Rocket

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4987 on: February 21, 2018, 10:00:39 AM »
+4
Design a study that links autism to homosexuality or maybe having a small penis.
Yes, that is me in court with my enormous penis.


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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4988 on: February 21, 2018, 11:39:36 PM »
+2
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ad_higXixRA" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ad_higXixRA</a>

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nl_Qyk9DSUw" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nl_Qyk9DSUw</a>

Aran

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4989 on: February 22, 2018, 12:09:33 AM »
+3
To be completely fair to the dude who literally doesn't shop for himself ever but hears screams of "EVERYTHING'S SO EXPENSIVE WHY IS IT ALL SO EXPENSIVE CAN'T AFFORD TO EAT!" coming from every useless sack of shit around, his guesses are pretty fair based on the echo chamber.

Hell, I do all the shopping in the house but don't buy any of those particular products and my guesses were $2.50, $12, $2, $10, and $5 so I lost the game too.

blasting_asshole

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4990 on: February 22, 2018, 07:38:16 AM »
+1
Yea, I got fooled too. The dental floss looked generic, so my guess there was under a dollar. They didn't mention how many Tide pods there were in the box, so that could have been anywhere from $10 - $40 and you're a goon if you eat rice-a-roni, pizza rolls and frozen TGI Fridays shit.

A gallon of milk, a dozen eggs and a loaf of name-brand bread would have been more tangible. Even something as common as a 12 pack of chicken drumsticks or bag of onions is gonna vary, depending on the store.
« Last Edit: February 22, 2018, 07:46:49 AM by blasting_asshole »

J Dog

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4991 on: February 22, 2018, 07:45:27 AM »
+1
Who spends $4 on dental floss?

Rocket

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4992 on: February 22, 2018, 09:08:11 AM »
0
Who spends $4 on dental floss?
I buy a lot of Plackers at ~ $4.
Yes, that is me in court with my enormous penis.



kosher nostra

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4994 on: February 22, 2018, 10:08:26 PM »
+7
I'm really failing to find a fault with this guy.

What's his opinion on Israel?

Dr. Hatchet-Wound

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4995 on: February 22, 2018, 10:37:15 PM »
+2
I'm really failing to find a fault with this guy.

What's his opinion on Israel?

Wondering too, I hope it involves rats in buckets strapped to chests.

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4996 on: February 22, 2018, 11:32:22 PM »
+6
lol a guy who works for human rights watch and describes himself on tinder as "championing economic and social justice" but also makes an auschwitz joke on the tinder profile has the predictable happen to him when other lizard-like beings complain:
https://www.rt.com/news/419306-hair-room-auschwitz-hrw/
« Last Edit: February 22, 2018, 11:35:14 PM by Dr. Hatchet-Wound »

Rocket

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4997 on: February 23, 2018, 05:09:52 AM »
+2
I don't get the joke. But then some retard clipped part of the sentence so I don't know what I'm missing.
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asip

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4998 on: February 23, 2018, 06:22:53 AM »
+7
augh? What the fuck could the first letter possibly be?

Rocket

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Re: Funny Shit From The News
« Reply #4999 on: February 23, 2018, 09:21:13 AM »
+1
augh? What the fuck could the first letter possibly be?
Ok, then, explain the stupid joke.
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